


Ghosts That We Knew

by LaLopez1981



Series: Picture Perfect [3]
Category: The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst and Humor, Come Back To Me, Established Relationship, Explicit Language, Family Drama, FrostIron - Freeform, Humor, IronFrost - Freeform, M/M, Male Slash, Minor Character Death, Picture Perfect, Threats of Violence, Trilogy, Twisted and Fluffy Feelings, dark side, starki - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-15
Updated: 2015-04-12
Packaged: 2017-12-15 00:54:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 145,984
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/843412
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LaLopez1981/pseuds/LaLopez1981
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After 8 years of marriage, Tony and Loki Stark are starting to crack under the pressures of work, a young family, and aging gracefully. After yet another fight, Tony flees and the next day he can’t remember a thing. But someone else does. Tony vows to fix his marriage even as a faceless threat tries to bring the Stark Empire down.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Snowy Dream, A Stark Reality

Loki Stark was sleeping peacefully, dreaming of lying out in the sun on a deserted island. Why, he did not know. He was not overly fond of tanning because fair skin and long exposure to the sun meant getting burned. And he was not really big on islands either, preferring mountains and snow and icy wind…and bundling up under a blanket with his husband. He sighed in his sleep as the dream melted into that scenario: a log cabin, a warm fire; and he was sure that was hot chocolate he could smell.

_ Could you smell in a dream? Ah, who cared? _

And there he was…his husband. Looking as handsome as always, smiling wide, his teeth bright white against the salt and pepper goatee — more pepper than salt, he would argue, adamantly — his deep chocolate brown eyes focused on Loki, holding that blanket open, waiting for Loki to join him. Dream Loki sat and handed off a steaming mug to Tony, holding his own with two hands now.

_ "Did you remember the marshmallows?" _

_ "Yes, of course, I did, darling." _

They cuddled together as they settled the blanket around them and Loki watched the fire, enjoying the burn in his eyes as the flames danced across the burning log. He could just hear high-pitched laughter and he smiled warmly thinking of his children. Then the peaceful moment was broken as a sudden siren blast pierced the relative quiet and his dream self jolted, but Tony had no reaction, only continuing to sip at his hot chocolate and twirling his fingers in Loki's hair, as was his habit.

_ "Did you hear that?" _

_ "Hear what, babe?" _

The siren sounded again.  _ "That." _

Tony looked at him and smiled.  _ "I think you're starting to hear things in your old age, baby." _

Loki pouted. The siren grew louder by the second and Loki had to clasp his hands over his ears. His mug had suddenly disappeared from his hand, as things tend to do in dreams.  _ "How can you not hear that?!" _

Tony continued to talk but Loki couldn't hear him. His green eyes scanned the room, looking for the source of the noise, and when he turned back to look at Tony again, his husband had a familiar look in his eyes, a smirk on his lips. Still wincing from the siren, Loki ignored it and let his eyes slip closed, because he wanted that kiss, that contact. He craved it. He missed it. He waited, moved closer and closer, anticipating Tony's lips on his…

And Tony shoved him.

Loki's eyes flew open and he jerked with a start. He stared at the alarm clock on his nightstand and sighed. He slammed a palm over it to silence it and felt another weak prod at his back. "Stop pushing at me. I've turned it off." He pressed a hand to his head, shoving his long hair from his face. "Come, let's get up. We've a big day ahead."

"What time is it?" Tony mumbled from under his pillow.

"Six-thirty," Loki answered, stretching his long, lean body in the bed before stopping to think about what was on the family's agenda today, mentally going over where he had to drive, whom he had to get where by what time, and somewhere in there, figure out the shopping and dinner.

"Mm-mm, too early."

Loki threw his covers aside and moved to roll out of bed but was unexpectedly pulled back by an arm around his waist. "Oh! Anthony…"

"Cuddle me," he demanded.

He sighed, clamping down on the surge of resentment that sprung up in him, remembering Tony's usual brush-offs when he was the one seeking a little attention. He had gotten so tired of the rejection, the excuses of work or being tired, that he couldn't remember the last time he had initiated any kind of physical contact. "I would, Anthony, but —"

"No, buts," he mumbled against Loki's shoulder, moving his head out from under the pillow. "Cuddle."

Loki was being squeezed against Tony's body, his calloused overworked hands roaming. And he rolled his eyes impatiently — despite the fact that his body tingled and warmed wherever Tony touched him. "We do not have time for that."

"Sure we do."

Another exasperated sigh left his lips. "No, we do not. It is the first day of school." He jerked again, yelping, when Tony's cold hand was down his pajama pants and palming his crotch. "Anthony!"

"Whatever, you know you like it," Tony teased, chuckling against him. Loki tentatively shared the laugh and hesitantly, testing, he nudged himself into Tony's hand.

" _ Pappa! _ " a high-pitched voice called out.

" _ Da-ad! _ " immediately followed.

_ "Get out of my way, Spaz!" _

Both men went still and Tony groaned softly. "Is the door locked?" he asked against Loki's ear, before pressing his lips to the skin behind it.

"No…"

"Ah, shit." Tony removed his arms and lightly moved Loki away, rolling all the way over until he could get out of the bed. "I'm gonna hit the shower."

Loki again suppressed more feelings of rejection and frustration and willed his arousal away. "Don't be long," he said, doing as Tony had, standing from the bed. He automatically began to fix the sheets and make up the bed. "You have to take Sebastian to school."

Tony stopped in the doorway of the bathroom, his morning arousal evident in the skimpy black shorts he had worn to bed. "Why am I taking him?"

Loki sighed loudly again, wanting badly to throw the pillow in his hand at Tony's head. "It's on your way to work, remember?" he said calmly, but also tightly.

"No, it's not," Tony argued, apparently oblivious to Loki's indignant manner. "It's out of my way. Why can't you take him — like you always do?"

Loki rigidly tossed down the last pillow and headed for their bedroom door where muted yelling was still going on, on the other side. "Yes, it is on your way. He starts at the junior high today, Anthony — on  _ your _ side of town. I cannot take him  _ and _ take Jameson and Audrey to their school. It's Audrey's first day, I need to walk her in." He pressed his lips together. "And Sebastian requested  _ you _ take him, anyway."

"But —"

Loki held up a finger and pulled open the door. "You had better be getting dressed while doing all that yelling! Be downstairs for breakfast by seven am!" He closed it again and crossed his arms as he faced Tony.

Tony scratched at his head, grateful once again that he stuck with the buzz cut he had to get when Jazz had come home with lice last year. At least, he thought it was Jazz. It could have been Bash. Either way, it cut down on the time he had to work on his hair. Speaking of Bash… "Bash is starting junior high?" Tony knew that was the wrong thing to ask when Loki threw up his hands in frustration.

"Do you listen to me when I speak to you?"

"Yes! Ugh." Tony scrubbed his hands over his face, scratching at the beard that he had grown in, and padded toward Loki. "I swear I do, Loki. I've just got a lot on my plate right now here and in New York and there's some shit going on with the employees in London…" When he reached Loki, Tony slipped his arms around his waist to hold him close. oki immediately tried to pull away, going tense and rigid in against him.

"Yes. I know. Work, work, work. Can you take him or not?" He pushed Tony's arms away and stepped back to walk to the closet.

Tony frowned a little, more hurt by the rejection than he would admit, and started back to the bathroom. "You know what, Loki?"

He twisted around quickly, eyebrows drawn high at the harsh tone but Tony never got to finish his thought. Audrey, their five year old, came bursting into the room, without knocking. With a glare aimed in Loki's direction, Tony stepped into the bathroom and slammed the door shut.

" _ Pappa! _ It's my first day of school for real!"

Loki erased the irritation from his face and smiled down at his only daughter, grinning up at him with bright hazel eyes, her jet black hair in messy curls around her face and shoulders. "Yes, darling, I know. But you forgot to knock again," he lightly scolded, tapping a long finger to her nose — a nose just like her mother's.

"Oops. Sorry!" she nearly sang, hunching tiny little shoulders.

Loki chuckled and laid his hand on her head, turning her around. "Come, my dear. You cannot go to school dressed in your sleeping clothes, now can you?"

"How come?" She questioned as they walked to the door again. "They're comfortable."

He laughed again. "Go get dressed. I put a few choices of outfits out for you last night."

"Ugh!" Looking exactly like Tony when he didn't get his way, in Loki's mind, Audrey threw her body around, showing her disapproval of whatever he said. "You chose  _ dresses _ . I  _ hate _ dresses."

"I'm sorry, darling. Feel free to pick something else you are more comfortable in. As long as it is not your pajamas." He watched her stomp out of the room and closed the door behind her.

He shot daggers at the closed bathroom door where the shower was now running as he headed for it to begin his morning ritual. His jaw clenched tightly when the door didn't budge, for Tony had locked it from the other side. Snatching his clothes for the day from the closet, Loki headed to the downstairs bath, which, thankfully, they kept spare toiletries in, fuming the entire time. After he was dressed, he didn't return to the bedroom, but instead headed for the kitchen to begin making breakfast.

And to avoid Tony.

* * *

True to his word, Loki had breakfast on the table for the family of five by seven o'clock. Audrey, dressed in jeans and an LA Dodgers t-shirt, and Jameson, in an almost identical outfit, were at the table with him, the little boy regaling tales of his first day of school — two long years ago — and plowing through their breakfasts. Loki called for Sebastian one more time, who had yet to come down for breakfast.

"Jameson, is your brother awake?"

"Uh-huh. But he was on his phone when I came downstairs."

Loki sighed wearily again and picked up his tea when Tony burst into the room, attempting to wind a red tie around his neck, something tucked under his arm. "Your food's on the counter," he murmured, barely glancing at him, and picked up his phone when it buzzed with a text from Natasha.

"No time for breakfast. Damn secretary just scheduled a conference call with London at eight-thirty. Where's Bash?"

Loki tried not to dwell on the bacon, eggs, and toast that was about to go to waste. "He has yet to come down. I've called for him but —"

"Bash! Get down here!" Tony yelled, standing just behind Loki.

"All right," he muttered under his breath. "You two." Jameson and Audrey's heads whirled around his way. "If you've finished your breakfasts, go brush your teeth. We leave in five minutes."

"Hey, hey, hey, come here." Tony waved the two over and knelt before them. "What grade are we starting, Jazz?"

"Second." The seven year old said with a big smile, missing a tooth in the bottom row of teeth. He had big brown eyes, lined with long, black lashes, just like Tony's.

"And you, Monkey?" he looked at Audrey. "You're in what, fifth, sixth now?" Loki playfully rolled his eyes as the two fell into a fit of giggles.

"It's my first day, Daddy," Audrey laughed, jumping in her spot excitedly.

"Oh, god, my bad!" Tony patted his hands over his chest and sides. "And I didn't get you anything. But you know who did?" He reached up to the counter and pulled a plastic wrapped pack from atop it. "Aunt Pepper brought this back for you from Tokyo." He handed her a Hello Kitty notepad, pencil and eraser set. Audrey's hazel eyes went wide and her mouth fell open.

"Wow!" Tony's heart swelled at Audrey's happiness.

"Anthony."

Tony glanced at Loki and checked his watch. "Okay, you crazy kids, you gotta go and I've got to go. So…" he stood and pressed a kiss to each child's head. "Have a good first day. And remember everything so you can tell me about it tonight, okay? Love you."

"Love you, Daddy!" They both yelled as they ran out, Jazz nearly tripping over his own foot, to brush their teeth.

Tony waited exactly two seconds after they were gone to turn to Loki. "What the hell crawled up your ass today?"

"Excuse me?" Loki asked on an incredulous laugh, rising to collect the dishes from the table. "You are the one who cannot be bothered to listen to anything I say about our children."

"Excuse me for having something else on my mind."

Loki smiled darkly at him. "Oh, yes, I know. Because no one else in this house carries a burden like the breadwinner, do they?"

Regretting this line of conversation, Tony only sighed. "That's not what I meant."

"I care not what you meant," he muttered, dumping the dishes in the sink with a loud crash.

Tony just watched him, silently seething because there was nothing he could say without looking like an asshole. What he wanted to say, what he would have been glad to remind his husband of nearly eight years of, was that it hadn't been his decision for Loki to be the stay-at-home dad.

Four years ago, the Stark family had relocated to the West Coast, following Sif after she scored a head chef's position at an extremely trendy Hollywood restaurant. They wanted to settle in the Malibu house, but both Loki and Tony felt the secluded, cliff-side mansion wasn't the best place to raise the kids. So they found a more modest — at least for Tony Stark — four-bedroom house not too far a drive from Natasha and Clint.

Because of the move, Loki left his position at NYU, and at first, continued his freelance writing. But Los Angeles was full of hungry writers and teaching positions at colleges were hard to find. Tony had suggested many things: starting a blog, writing a novel, teaching high school. Ultimately, Loki decided, with three kids under the age of ten, and in a new city, maybe it would have been best for him to stay at home with them. At least, he had said at the time, for a few years.

Moving to L.A. wasn't a big deal for Tony; he had offices there and Pepper easily took over control in New York, moving into the living space of the tower with her new husband, Happy, after he and Loki had moved out. And the arrangement actually helped their working relationship; they weren't getting on each other's nerves or bickering as much, and they easily split up the workload; she handled the day-to-day business, he did his thing in the lab, and every once in awhile they came together — or, more accurately, Pepper dragged him into the business part.

After the whole debacle eight years ago with Thanos Anderson and Justin Hammer, Tony was able to snatch up the deal with Japan he had lost to Hammer Industries just months before, and Pepper worked something out with a lab in London, making Stark Industries a worldwide company. The co-CEOs alternated business trips, which became even more difficult when Pepper and Happy adopted a baby girl they named Emma, three years before; but between them, they managed very well.

It was a life Tony Stark never thought he would have — marriage, kids, and the whole domestic kick. But he had loved every minute of it.

Sebastian, almost a teenager now, was proving to be just like his father — intelligent, obstinate, very mischievous, and once in awhile, a complete pain in the ass. Tony noticed lately that he didn't seem to want to be around Loki, preferring to linger around Tony or be by himself in his bedroom, buried in a book. It wasn't a cause for concern yet, but Tony could only see it becoming more trouble than necessary the older Sebastian got.  His natural son, Jameson, or "Jazz" as everyone but Loki called him, reminded him so much of himself. He was quiet, until you got him started on something he knew every detail about. Early on, Tony suspected Jazz might be of a higher intelligence than most children his age and, like a young Tony, he had a knack for science and math. And while he was unwilling to push Jazz, as Howard had pushed him, Loki worried that he wasn't being challenged enough — especially since he often got into trouble when he was idle. Just like Tony. Two years after Jazz was born, Tony and Loki approached Sif once again about another child, and Tony finally got to name one of his kids after a car. Her full name, at Loki's insistence, was Audrey Maria, but Tony called her Audi — his favorite make of car. And as much as Sebastian was a miniature Loki, Audi turned out to be a miniature Sif. Even at the tender age of five, and the baby sister of two brothers with very strong-personalities, Audi was smart, sassy, and Tony doted on her like the Stark Princess she was.

The first five years of their marriage flew by so quickly, Tony's head nearly spun with the thought of everything they had done in those years. But some time in the last couple, the relationship between them had taken a backseat to the kids, the sports practices, the music lessons, and the playdates. And, of course, Tony's work. Jarvis was still the control center of the house, and kept them all safe, but the only one who truly utilized him was Tony, especially in the lab he built himself in the basement of the house.

He tried not to spend too much time down there when he was home; mostly he sought solitude there when he and Loki were engrossed in one of their spats — which were happening more often than he liked lately. This morning wasn't the first time they had been interrupted, nor was it the first time he had to initiate any kind of physicality between them. Loki seemed to have lost interest. And Tony missed him. A lot. He missed waking up with those long limbs tangled with his. He missed falling asleep with his husband's head on his chest, his raven hair tickling his throat, his fingers carding through it, even in his sleep. He missed drowning in that forest scent that comforted him, especially when he was away. He would often take a sweater or scarf of Loki's and sleep with it on his work trips. And he missed having sex. It had been a while since they had done it — understandable with three kids that constantly sought their attention.

But, damn, if he didn't love those kids. Kids he wouldn't have if it wasn't for Loki — and Sif.

While they had settled in an affluent suburb of Los Angeles, near Clint, Natasha, and their kids, Sif got herself ensconced in North Hollywood, and within weeks, found a girlfriend who was an artist, to complete the bohemian image. When they were in New York, Sebastian alternated between the apartment Tony had given her after she gave birth to Jazz, and Stark Tower, spending roughly two weeks at one then the other. But upon moving to L.A., Sif felt the best place for Sebastian was with Tony and Loki. So she wasn't around enough to see the change in both Tony and Loki's relationship and Sebastian's behavior.

Tony sighed, and not for the first time, clamped down on a smart remark. "Could we not start the day like this?"

"Like what?" Loki was vigorously scrubbing the pan he had cooked the eggs in then set it aside to dry. He dried his hands on a dish towel and faced Tony.

He angled his head to the side. "Loki, can we just —" The sound of feet trampling down the stairs cut him off and he growled angrily to himself, turning away so the kids didn't see his angry expression.

"I’m ready,  _ Pappa! _ " Audrey ran in, her purple backpack flapping against her as she came to a stop in front of Loki, Jazz right beside her. Loki plucked two brown bags from the counter and held one out to each of them.

"Here's your lunch." He swiped up his car keys and held them toward Jazz, who held out his hand. "You can get in the car. I'll be out in a moment. Backseat, Jameson. No arguments. And do not turn on the radio."

He scoffed and rolled his eyes, closing his fingers around the keys when Loki dropped them into his open palm. "Fine…"

They shouted goodbyes to Tony again and Loki listened to their voices as they made their way to the front of the house, waiting until he heard the door close. "What were you going to say this morning?"

Tony stared at him for a moment, drawing a complete blank. He couldn't really remember what happened before the shocking hot water hit his face, waking him up, and he worked down the raging hard-on he had woken up with. "I don't…I don't know what you're talking about."

Loki clucked his tongue, looking away. "Never mind."

"No — don't 'never mind' me, goddamn it!" Tony slapped a hand to the counter, drawing Loki's gaze. "You got a problem, tell me. Don't just sit there, giving me that fucking little bitch face, stewing in whatever is wrong with you!  _ Talk _ to me, Loki."

Surprise flickered across those green eyes so quickly Tony thought maybe he imagined it. Then that cool, calm veneer immediately replaced it. His voice was just above a whisper when he said, "Why should I bother telling you anything when you clearly do not listen to me?"

"I fucking listen to you!"

"…Dad…?"

Tony stared at Loki for a moment longer then clenched his teeth together.  _ Shit. _ He ran a hand over his head, turning to look at Sebastian, standing in the doorway. He frowned a little at the way his black hair flopped over half of his face, hiding one of his eyes from view. He hated that damn haircut. "Hey, kiddo," he said more cheerfully than he felt at the moment. "You ready for your first day?"

Sebastian's lone visible eye darted to Loki then back to Tony. "Yeah…"

"Cool. Why don't you head out to the car and I'll be out in a minute?"

Sebastian started to turn, but halted, peeking sheepishly at his fathers, when Loki spoke up. "No need. Your brother and sister are waiting for me." Loki picked up a third brown bag and walked around a quietly blustering Tony. He held the brown bag out to Sebastian, who hesitantly took it, and pressed a light kiss to the top of his head. A tiny part of Loki's heart ached at the fact that Sebastian was nearly up to his shoulder now. "Good luck on your first day, darling."

Sebastian nodded, but barely looked at him. Loki bit back a sigh, frustrated at Sebastian's sudden withdrawal from him and glanced over his shoulder toward Tony.

"Have a good day at work."

Tony smiled tightly, wanting badly to just pull him back, drag him upstairs, and have it out — whether that meant screaming and yelling out all their frustrations with each other or fucking each other senseless, he didn't care. He just wanted this tension between them to disappear. "Sorry you had to see that, Bash," he said when they were alone.

Sebastian shrugged lazily. "It's not like I haven't heard you guys fight before," he said as he started to turn away.

"That's not — we don't…" Tony trailed off as Sebastian walked out of the house. He snatched up his keys, and sent a message to Jarvis through his phone to set a map to Sebastian's school. He paused, just outside the closed door, when he realized he had no idea what the school's name was. Jarvis informed him — smugly, he just knew, damn it — that Loki had already programmed it for him two weeks ago.

With equal amounts of love and frustration for his husband, Tony jumped into his car, and much to the delight of his oldest son, he sped out of the garage and down the quiet suburban street.

 


	2. Romeo, Explosions, and an Attitude Adjustment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Had an awesome a/n that stupid ff.net lost. -____-
> 
> Apologies for the angst! And, yes, there will be more. :P
> 
> XOXO, LaLa

"I dunno. Maybe I should just go for Tybalt or Mercutio."

Loki frowned as he ran his knife through the broccoli on his cutting board. "Why do you not think you are a Romeo? You have two shining examples of him as your fathers," he said with a grin. Sebastian snickered but rolled his eyes. "Do not underestimate yourself, love. Go for the role that is the most challenging; not the one you believe you can skate by on."

Sebastian only shrugged his shoulder. He reached a long, slinky arm over the island between him and Loki and snatched up a small floret of broccoli. Loki clucked his tongue at him, but he popped it into his mouth before he could do much else.

"Honestly, I think you are very much the other side of Romeo." Loki scooped up the broccoli, dumping it on the saucepan next to him, and moved on to the cauliflower. "At least, I would hope you are not the lovesick teenager who acts much too rashly. But…he is the eldest son of a very important man. He is quiet, sensitive, and a little broody." He smirked up at his oldest boy. "I believe you have all those colors in you."

Sebastian's lips quirked, mirroring the smirk on his father's face. "I'm not sensitive," he mumbled.

"All right…" Loki murmured concentrating on his cutting. He scooped the cauliflower into the pan and reached for the carrots next. "Will you be digging up your old accent? Or will this be an American version?" He bit back a big smile when Sebastian let out a tickled laugh.

"I don't know what the teacher wants, but I'm sure I can sound like my old self again. Though I'll probably sound more like you. Heh."

"You say that like it's a bad thing, my boy. So, what made you decide to audition for the play? You have never shown an interest in acting. Are you giving up on your music?"

"No." Sebastian nibbled on a chunk of carrot. "I'll still play. It's just…" He continued to chew thoughtfully, not noticing Loki watching him closely. "Someone told me I should go for it."

Loki suppressed a smile. "Someone…who perhaps is going for the role of Juliet?"

Sebastian gave him a very impatient look, but Loki could see the tinge of pink on the one cheek not hidden by his black hair. "Pop…" Loki raised his hands in surrender and carried the saucepan to the stove.

A little part of him was heartbroken that Sebastian had stopped calling him  _Pappa_  about a year before—around the time his voice dropped—and chose to adopt the less childish, Pop.  _Like_   _I'm a damn soft drink_ , he would often think to himself. But these days he had to take what he could get and just counted himself grateful they hadn't had any incidents the last few days. He hoped it was coincidental that Tony happened to be out of town in those few days. "You know I did a paper—well, actually a few papers—on  _Romeo and Juliet_."

Sebastian's only response was a lift of his eyebrows as Loki turned back to the island.

"And I spent some time on a stage or two in my day." He smiled softly. "I can help you prepare a piece for your audition. If you would like," he added belatedly.

The boy only shrugged noncommittally. "Maybe…"

Loki kept the smile on his face but all he could think was,  _You are too much like me_. He returned to the stove to check on the chicken baking in the oven and to hide the slight hurt he felt. He wished he understood why Sebastian had grown to pull away from him. He wasn't overly talkative with anyone, withdrawn just as Loki had been at his age, but he was less hesitant with Sif and his siblings, and even with Tony a little. But it took a lot of patience and tongue-biting—on both sides, he imagined—for him and Sebastian to talk to each other. Considering it was a problem he was simultaneously having with Tony, Loki wondered if maybe  _he_  was the problem, after all.

" _Pappa_!  _Pappa_!"

Audrey pulled him from his dire thoughts and he forced his lips to curve in the semblance of a smile. "Yes, my sweet?"

"Look!" She held up a large piece of lined paper, showing her attempt at writing the alphabet. "I finished my letters."

Loki took the paper and studied it briefly. "Is this cursive?"

Audrey swung herself from side to side. "Uh-huh."

"Well, look at that. Marvelous." He bent a little and took her chin in his hand, tipping up her tiny face. "I insist you stop, my sweet girl. You are growing up far too fast."

Her eyes went wide when he told her to stop then her lips spread in a wide, baby-toothed smile and she giggled. "You're silly,  _pappa_."

Loki laughed with her, handing her back the paper, but something deep inside him ached. He quickly turned away and checked the food on the stove.

"When is daddy coming home?"

"Oh, he should be back tonight. But you know your father; he can be very unpredictable." He switched off the heat under the pan the rice was in and once more checked the chicken. Deciding it was done, he pulled on some oven mitts and took it out.

"Can I stay up to see him?"

Loki chuckled and glanced at his little girl, crawling up onto a stool set at the island. "You should be a comedienne, my dear."

"Please,  _pappa_? I miss him." Her little legs, in long jean shorts decorated with glitter and skulls, dangled over the edge of the stool.

"Well, we all miss him, my sweet. But it is a school night." He turned to face her, leaning one hand on the island and crossing his feet at the ankles. "And you will be all tight and snugly in your bed, asleep, before he gets here."

Audrey threw her head back, in that dramatic fashion that children do, slumping on the stool. "Pleeeease, please, please, please…!"

Loki chuckled. "You sound just like your dad—"

"Will you just tell her yes, so she can shut the hell up?"

Both Loki and Audrey went quiet, turning their heads in unison to look at Sebastian. Audrey slumped differently now, aiming a very angry expression at her big brother. " _Hei_." Loki waited for Sebastian to look at him, a stern gaze pinching his features. " _Det ikke er behov for det_."

Sebastian's jaw clenched. "Why do you always take her side?"

Loki straightened. "I am not taking her side, Sebastian. I don't want you talking to her—or anyone—like that."

"Whatever," he scoffed, picking up his copy of  _Romeo and Juliet_  and started to walk out.

 _And we're back_ , Loki thought with a sigh. "Stay here, Audrey." He followed Sebastian, catching him just as he was heading up the stairs. "Sebastian."

"What?" the young boy snapped, stopping halfway up the staircase.

Loki's brow furrowed. "Mind your tone."

"I don't have a tone."

"Actually, young man, you do. And I don't like it. I won't have you talking to anybody in this house like that, do you understand me? Now I want you to go in there and apologize to your sister."

"For what? She was whining like a little baby. It's not my fault she acts like that. She probably learned it from  _you_."

A mixture of hurt and indignation swirled inside Loki, and slowly, he moved up the few steps that had him towering over Sebastian. "What did you say?"

Sebastian stared back, his emerald eyes defiantly locked on Loki's, pinching his lips together. "I didn't stutter," he said softly, but acerbically.

Dear gods, Loki was actually feeling sorry for Odin having to deal with him and Thor at this age. He sighed sharply and lifted his chin, glowering down at Sebastian. "No. You didn't. But you have just earned yourself two weeks of extra chores and no phone or computer privileges outside of schoolwork."

"What? Why?" Sebastian's eyes went wide as saucers. "That's not fair! I didn't do anything."

"Disrespecting me is not doing anything?" Sebastian didn't respond, only glared at the carpeted stairs. "I don't enjoy punishing you, Sebastian. But you give me no choice when you behave this way."

His head snapped up, his mouth still in a tight pout. "You sure act like you enjoy it. Dad wouldn't have punished me."

"Oh, no? You think he would have allowed you to tell your sister to shut up. He would not," he snapped, silencing whatever tart remark Sebastian was about to let out. He sighed, upset that he was near to losing his temper. "Go to your room; I'll call you for dinner."

" _Faen dette_ ," Sebastian muttered under his breath as he started to turn away.

" _Excuse me?!_ " Loki shouted loud enough to have Sebastian hunch his shoulders and freeze. "Did you just say what I think you said?" Sebastian turned halfway, but didn't look directly at him. " _Svar meg_ _!_ "

"Yes!" He yelled back, facing him fully.

Loki's eyes were tight and his lips pressed together. "I can only guess where you heard that word, but don't you ever use that language in front of me again, do you understand?"

Sebastian mumbled a yes and Loki excused him to his bedroom again. The preteen huffed quietly, turned and stomped his way up the stairs.

Loki slumped against the wall, pressed his fingers to his eyes, wondering if anything that had just transpired in the last ten minutes would have been different if Tony was there at that moment. He would never know.

"Pappa _, the pot's bubbling!"_

"Shit. Shit," he repeated at his own swearing, after scolding Sebastian for using the 'F' word, and sprinted back to the kitchen. "Thank you, darling." He kissed Audrey's forehead as he passed by her and turned the heat off under the steaming vegetables. He looked down at a tug on his shirt, surprised to find Audrey had climbed down from the stool on her own. This was why Tony called her Monkey. "Yes?"

"Can I please stay up?" she asked softly, pushing out her bottom lip.

He barked out a laugh, knowing full well who she learned that little trick from. He hooked his hands under her armpits and hefted her up, pressing a kiss to her cheek as her short arms went around his neck. "Just this once, all right?"

"Yay!" Audrey cupped his face and pressed a smacking kiss to his lips.

"Tell your brothers to wash up." He set her down, lightly patted her bottom. "And tell Jameson it's his turn to set the table."

"'Kay. If he ever stops pouting like a big old baby," she muttered under her breath.

"Don't forget your homework." He took it from the counter and held it out to her. She ran out and Loki moved to the refrigerator to look at the calendar attached to it, with the family's schedules. Tony had gone to Tokyo this time, since Pepper had gone the previous trip, but was due back on a late flight that evening.

The rest of the space of the refrigerator was covered here and there with pictures of the kids, of him and Tony, handmade magnets and precious works of art going as far back as a picture Sebastian drew for him when he was six. Studying a picture of him and Tony, from a few years back, before things started going downhill, Loki thought back to a time when it was just four of them, and the boys were small. When Tony would go on his business trips, Loki would leave them with Pepper and meet Tony at the airport to pick him up. They would often have to stop at the nearest hotel, barely making it out of the place without mounting each other right then and there. It was still a honeymoon phase when going a day without each other was torture.

Loki missed the days when they would spend one entirely in bed, wrapped around each other. Those days were long gone—and not just because of the children. As it does, life and responsibilities got in the way. He didn't know for sure when things between he and Tony changed; he just wished he knew how to fix it.

He blamed himself. He was so concerned about the kids and raising them right and making sure they were healthy and happy, he felt maybe he had let himself go. He hadn't gained any weight, but rather he had become much too lean. He still wore his hair shoulder-length, but he had noticed that between those jet-black strands, peeks of silver were starting to poke through. That frustrated him more than it should; he was going to be forty in a few months, after all. Still, the salt-and-pepper look didn't work on him as it did on Tony. Tony looked distinguished and it made him even more handsome. On Loki, it just looked… _wrong_.

He could feel himself falling, day by day, deeper and deeper into that dark place; a place he hadn't been in since before Tony became the light in his life. And he felt ashamed for it. He loved his children, and despite this rough patch they were in, he loved his husband, dearly. He had a nice home, a good life—he had no business feeling the way he did. And that only served to make him feel worse.

He would often watch Clint and Natasha with their two young kids, a newborn, and two successful careers—something Loki couldn't lay claim to anymore. He still wrote in his free time, what he had of it, but he hadn't worked at an actual job since they left New York. He wondered how the Romanov-Barton household pulled it off.

"Neither of them has to travel for their jobs," he whispered to himself, touching a long finger to Tony's face on the silver door. He was violently pulled from his reverie when Jameson came speeding into the kitchen, avoiding looking at Loki, and headed straight to the drawer with the utensils. Letting it slide, Loki began to pull four plates from an upper cabinet and moved to the stove.

"Pappa, are you gonna tell daddy what I did at school?" Jameson asked softly.

"Yes, of course, I am." He handed a full plate to the little boy, who pouted just like Audrey said he was doing.

"Am I grounded?"

Loki laid a hand against his cheek, tapped it lightly, and returned his attention to pouring food on the second plate. "We will discuss it tomorrow with your dad."

Jameson groaned. "I'm  _so_  grounded."

* * *

Tony couldn't deny that he was a little disappointed when, upon entering the house, there was no one there waiting up for him in the living room. He knew the late time he was getting in was partly to blame, but it still would have been nice to see his little girl running to him and slamming into him with a hard hug. Or Jazz tripping his way to him. Or even a small smile from Sebastian.

Would it have been too much to hope for Loki to welcome him back with those five little words he uttered every time Tony would return to him, going back to their college days?

Exhausted, he dumped his bag by the stairs, careful not to leave it where anyone—namely clumsy little Jazz—could trip over it, then climbed up the steps to the second floor. He was about to turn and head toward the boys' room, just to check in on them, but he noticed the light coming from under the door of his own bedroom. Loki was usually asleep by this hour. His curiosity won out, so he instead headed for their shared room. He pushed open the already slightly ajar door and leaned against the doorjamb with a small, satisfied smile.

Loki was sitting up on his side of the bed, a book spread open on his chest, fast asleep. Audrey was curled up in the middle facing Jazz, who was stretched out like a starfish on Tony's side. He glanced back over his shoulder, wondering why Sebastian wasn't in there with them.

He watched them sleeping for a minute, enjoying the rare quiet. He had to press a hand to his mouth, stifling a chuckle, when Jazz twitched in his sleep and raised his arm, hitting Audrey as he dropped it back down. She whined and kicked out her leg, hitting Loki, and his book started to slide from his listless hands.

Tony sprinted across the short distance to the bed, catching the hardbound book before it thumped to the floor. He flipped it over and grinned to himself at Loki's penchant for rereading  _The Count of Monte Cristo_ , in French, every year.

"You're home…"

Tony's eyes shot to Loki, sleepily looking up at him through half-lidded green eyes, and smiled at him. He set the book on the nightstand, sitting beside Loki on the bed, hiding his disappointment that those weren't the words Loki used to say. "Yeah…" He shot a glance toward the other side of the bed and gave a short nod. "Gone for a couple of nights and you give my spot away?"

Loki's lips curved lazily. "They begged me to let them wait up for you. Jameson fell asleep first. Poor Audrey. She held on as long as she could." He started to push up. "Let me take them to their rooms."

"No, no." Tony laid a hand on Loki's stomach, urging him back down. "Just let them sleep. I'll bunk in the lab tonight."

"…Are you sure?"

Tony enjoyed the look of distress in Loki's eyes and the way he laid a pale hand over his, still on his belly. "Yeah, it's just one night." He rubbed his hand over Loki before he removed it and bent down to begin untying his shoelaces. "Where's Bash?"

"He opted to stay in his room." He sighed, then said, "He's upset with me. Well, we're upset with each other. We had a bit of an argument."

Tony turned his head. "Again? What happened this time?"

Loki shook his head, letting out a long breath, and launched into a brief explanation of his and Bash's exchange of words. Tony was shocked. Sure, every once in awhile a shit or a damn would slip through in front of the kids. But they both were conscious about reserving the big F word for when they were alone. "He scowled all through dinner."

"Why would he think I would let him get away with that?" Loki shrugged, pursed his lips. Tony knew Bash's behavior was weighing heavy on him, heavier than he was willing to talk about with him. So he just let it go. "I'll talk to him," he said with a soft smile. "Anything else exciting happen while I was gone?"

"He is planning to audition for the school play."

"No shit?" he whisper-shouted. Loki nodded. "What play?"

" _Romeo and Juliet_."

Tony smiled even wider. "Is he going for Romeo?"

"When we ended our discussion, he was leaning that way."

"That's my boy." Loki giggled softly and Tony smirked at him, enjoying the sound. "What about my Monkey and Jazz?"

"Audrey's got most of her letters down…in cursive," he added even softer than before.

Tony was stuffing his socks into his shoes and turned on the bed, facing Loki fully. "Shut up." Loki's lips curved, but Tony could see it was bittersweet.

"It's true." He looked down at her now, rubbing a hand over her back. "Our baby's getting too big, too fast, Anthony," he said so softly, if Tony wasn't sitting as close as he was, he wouldn't have heard it.

He twisted around to look at her, as well, and slipped two fingers under her tiny hand, rubbing his thumb over her knuckles. "She could be a hundred years old, she'll still be our baby, hon." He watched her sleep, laid a hand over her ribcage just to feel the rise and fall of her breathing. Most people thought she was a tiny version of Sif—if they knew Sif. And while she had Sif's honey-toned eyes and jet black wavy hair, to him, she was just a more delicate version of Loki—which was probably why he doted on her. He sighed heavily, yawned, and righted his body. "I'm beat. I'm going to head down to bed."

Loki's fingers caught his wrist before he could rise. Tony looked at him expectantly and he seemed hesitant. "We need to talk about Jameson."

Tony frowned at the seriousness in Loki's tone, and because it seemed like that wasn't what he originally wanted to say. "Why? What happened?"

"He was suspended from school for three days today."

His frown deepened and he scoffed. "What? He's in second grade. And it's barely been a month of school. How does that happen?"

Loki chuckled lightly, his fingers loosening around Tony' wrist, but not falling from it. "Actually, it's been almost two months. He's not been very forthcoming with the details, but from what the principle explained to me, he created some sort of sodium solution that caused an eruption in the boys' bathroom."

Tony squeaked out a laugh and hurriedly covered his mouth to stop it. Especially with the look Loki was giving him. "How did he know—oh my god, that kid."

" _Your_  child, clearly," Loki muttered with a small smirk. "He would like to spend his three days of suspension with you at work…" Tony grinned excitedly at that. " _But_  I am afraid that would not be very much of a punishment."

He deflated a little, but chuckled softly. "No, I guess it wouldn't… Let's talk about it tomorrow. Since I got in so late, I'm gonna work from home."

"Oh…that's too bad." Loki smiled almost apologetically when Tony looked up. "I will be busy and away tomorrow. I've promised Natasha I would help her prepare for the party on Saturday. She's running a little ragged with the baby having come early. So I may not be around to get your lunch."

Tony shrugged, grinned, enjoying that Loki was even concerned about that. "Then I'll just have to make my own tuna sandwich." He started to place his hand over Loki's, still on his wrist, but the younger man removed it before he could. "Hey, uh, don't get mad at me, but what party is this on Saturday?"

Loki sighed softly and his lips tightened a little. "It is their usual Back to School BBQ they throw after the first month of school. Natasha is cursing Clint's name every five seconds, but it gives all the parents a chance to get to know each other. And the children seem to enjoy it. It was delayed, of course, because of Alexander. But they are determined to still have it."

Tony sighed. "Great. Can't wait," he said very unenthusiastically. "I'm gonna go…" He yawned again, rubbed a hand over his tired eyes.

"Anthony…stay here."

Tony started to protest again, but Loki had turned to roll Audrey closer to him. In her sleep, the little girl curled herself around her father, her tiny hands fisted into the hem of his cotton t-shirt. He chuckled and let her settle, reaching for Jazz's arm and leg, dragged him closer and put him on his side, leaving a larger space for Tony. He grinned sleepily at his husband. "Thanks."

Loki's lips curved a little and their eyes met almost accidentally, and held. He looked so beautiful in the dimmed light of the lamp next to their bed, soft and mussed from his earlier sleep. There was still so much love here; it was probably why they hadn't separated, trudging through the hard time. Tony raised a hand to Loki's face, sweeping a few strands back from over his eyes, and let his fingers trail down the side of his angular face. He wanted to kiss him, to just brush his lips over his, to feel them give and part against his. And he could tell Loki wanted him to.

They both froze when Audrey murmured  _pappa_  in her sleep and burrowed into him.

The moment gone, Tony simply squeezed Loki's hand and walked around the bed to slide in on his own side.

* * *

"Where the hell did you even learn how to do that, Jazz?"

Tony sat in the chair from Jazz's desk, across from the little boy who was perched on the edge of his twin bed, set against one side of the bedroom, as far from Sebastian's as the older boy could get it.

Tony hadn't had the best night of sleep. When he wasn't having some of the steamier dreams of Loki that he'd had in quite some time, he was being aggressively awakened by tiny hands and feet digging into his back and pushing at his head, and reminded why he and Loki had stopped letting the kids sleep in their bed. By the time he was able to get comfortable, and before the alarm even went off, he could hear hushed giggling and feel little fingers gliding in his hair, poking at his cheek, and pinching his nose. Loki came to his rescue and dragged his laughing monsters away, letting him sleep just a little longer.

Once he was up and dressed, he made his way to the boys' room, forced Sebastian to go down for breakfast, the preteen grumbling the whole way, and set Jazz down for a little talk.

He shrugged his little shoulders. "I dunno."

"That's not an answer, buddy."

His fingers started to twitch and he brought them together in front of him, wringing and twisting them together. "I read it in my science book…?"

Tony frowned, cocked his head. "Was that a question?"

Jazz sighed heavily, almost whining. "I asked Jarvis," he finally admitted.

Tony had to stifle a giggle. "You…" He cleared his throat to hide the chuckle that bubbled up through his throat. "You asked Jarvis? When did you ask Jarvis?"

The little boy scratched at his head, shrugged again. "Um…I don't 'member," he almost whispered.

Tony leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees and clasping his hands together over his mouth. "Did you go into my lab, Jazz?" He stared at him unmoving, brown eyes wide, for a moment. "Jameson."

He squeezed his eyes closed and let out a muffled whine. "Yes."

"You know you're not supposed to be down there when I'm not here. Right?" He nodded, lowering his head to stare at the carpet. "So you not only broke the school's rules, you broke mine. For two weeks, when I'm working, you're downstairs sweeping up the lab and doing whatever extra chores I can find for you, you got me?"

Jazz's eyes lifted briefly to Tony's, a smile curving his little lips, and nodded. A punishment, yes, but he still got to be in the lab. "Can I go to work with you today?"

Tony shook his head. "Sorry, hon. You'll be with your  _pappa_  all day, helping out your Aunt Natasha," he said, getting to his feet and replacing the chair to the desk.

The little boy made a disapproving clucking sound. "Why?" he asked, drawing out the word. "Why can't I go with you?"

"Because going with me isn't punishment, buddy," he said with a lighthearted laugh. "Go down and get your breakfast before you're  _pappa_  has a heart attack."

"Why do I still have to get up if I'm not going to school anyway?" he complained as he dragged his feet to the door.

"You're not on vacation!" Jazz screamed excitedly as Tony snatched him up and hauled him over his shoulder to carry him downstairs.

After the kids were fed, they all piled into cars and went their separate ways again. Tony was merging onto the freeway, heading toward Sebastian's school, and reached over to turn down the radio.

"I like that song," Sebastian mumbled.

"Me, too, but I've got to talk to you."

"Gee…let me guess what about."

Tony glanced at him. He was staring out the window, his lips in a pout. He shook his head at the thought that he looked so much like Loki it was ridiculous. "Bash…what's going on with you?" He got no response. "O-kay…you wanna play the silence game. I can do that. I was going to try and treat you with a little dignity and have a conversation. But if you'd rather me talk  _at_  you, so be it."

Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Sebastian turn his head just slightly his way.

"Since I'm talking at you, I'm going to tell you what you're  _not_  going to be doing from here on out." He checked his blind spot, flicked on his blinker and moved into the right lane to pull onto the off-ramp. "You are  _not_  going to talk to your father like that ever again, I don't care how upset you are with him. You are  _not_  going to tell your baby sister to shut up—or anyone else for that matter. There are easier and even more fun ways of getting people to stop talking. Being a dick about it isn't going to win you any friends."

He glanced at the boy and caught the roll of his eyes.

"What? Oh, I see. Big, bad Bash doesn't need any friends, right?" Sebastian shifted a little, looking uncomfortable. "Why would you ever think I'd be okay with you talking to them like that?"

"I never said you would be."

"Really, because that's not what your father told me."

He shifted again. "All I said was that you wouldn't have punished me for it."

Tony pulled up to a stoplight and chuckled softly. "Well, you're wrong, son; I would have done exactly what your father did. You know you're lucky, Bash. The first time I used the F-word in front of my dad, he smacked me right in the mouth. And I was fourteen." He remembered it wasn't long after that that he had tried to kill himself and pressed his lips together.

"Fine. I'm already grounded."

"Can you even hear yourself?" He pulled the car to a stop behind a line of cars leading up to the school. "You sound like the most miserable person on this planet and I cannot for the life of me understand why."

Sebastian finally looked at him, his green eyes wide, and his lips still in a pout. "I'm not miserable," he defended softly.

The car moved up a few feet and Tony raised his eyebrows even higher. "Then what? Bash, the last few months you've walked around the house like a goddamn zombie. Shit, don't tell your father I said that. Or that."

Sebastian chuckled softly.

"Oh my god, did you just laugh?" Tony reached over and playfully shook Sebastian by the arm, as the car moved closer to the school. "Jesus, we're gonna have an earthquake or something! You cracked a smile! Hallelujah!"

Sebastian giggled again, swatting at Tony's arm.

"Listen, kiddo, I don't know what's going on with you. But you know I'm always here to listen. I don't always have great advice—you're better off going to your father for that. Then again, I'm a genius; I could invent a solution."

Tony pulled the car to a stop and waited as Sebastian unbuckled his seatbelt.

"Hey." Sebastian was halfway out the door and looked over his shoulder back at Tony. "Just promise me you'll work on your attitude a little bit?" The young boy made a face but nodded. Tony held up his fist toward his son and Sebastian limply bumped his fist to it. "Love you, kiddo."

"Same," he mumbled before stepping out and closing the door behind him. He watched his dad drive off, drawing attention as the wheels of his black Audi skidded along the pavement, and hunched into himself at the stares, giggles and fingers aimed his way. Feeling himself turn red, Sebastian turned and ran from the school as fast as he could.


	3. Sif Catches Up and Loki Gets Jealous

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, my lovely readers! I hope you're all enjoying these quick updates. I start summer session on Monday, going from 8:30-3:50 MTW and 8:30-11:05 on Thursdays, so who knows what my time will be like. Until then I'm writing as much as I can and posting when I think it's ready. :)
> 
> I guess I should apologize for all the feels and drama with the kids, but, hey, that's real life. How realistic would it be if everything is always hunky dory? And I do apologize. Because it's not going to get better anytime soon. Sorry. :(
> 
> XOXO, LaLa

The Family Stark arrived at the Barton's home and found the party was well underway. Getting the kids together proved difficult for both Loki and Tony. It was the last time Loki would let Tony get Audrey ready. Her hair was in knots, a bow or three randomly placed here and there, and he wouldn't even think about the clothes he had put her in.

Loki had been dealing with a very hyper Jazz, who wouldn't stay still long enough to get dressed, and arguing with Sebastian about his punishment while he did. Tony finally got tired of hearing the yelling, marched into the room, and yanked Loki out. They were able to finally calm everyone down, but were running nearly forty minutes late.

On the short drive, Tony struggled to focus on the road, respond to the flood of messages he was getting from work on both coasts and across the pond, and keep Sebastian and Jazz from killing each other, and not kill Audrey in the process, while Loki bitched about him worrying about work on the weekend and Natasha's incessant text messages.

Once they arrived and were let out of the car, Jazz and Audrey bolted toward the house, eager to greet their friends. Loki spotted a little redhead in the front windows of the house, who had likely been sitting there for awhile, awaiting Sebastian's arrival. He let the younger two run ahead, and Sebastian walked up alone. He waited for Tony as he lagged behind, glued to his phone.

"Anthony."

"Hmm…?" He didn't look up until he bumped lightly into his husband. "Oh. Sorry." He glanced up and caught the look on Loki's face. "What?"

Loki breathed out slowly, his patience already wearing thin. "Could you please put aside work for one evening?"

Tony spread his hands, his phone still buzzing in one of them. "I'm here, aren't I?"

"That is not the same thing."

"Loki, I told you we have some issues with the London office, didn't I? I'm here, I'm looking forward to seeing our friends, but I can't stop people from sending me updates, okay? So get off my back."

Loki stiffened, his face hardened, even as Tony realized what he had said and apologized. Without a word, or an acknowledgement of the apology, Loki turned and walked into the house, leaving his husband rushing to follow. He put a smile on his face as neighbors and parents of his children's friends greeted him.

"Loki."

He turned his head to look at Tony and caught sight of Ana leading Sebastian toward her bedroom. He laid a hand against Tony's chest and jerked his chin in their direction. Tony followed and half-frowned, half-smiled.

"Bash!" Sebastian jolted and spun around. Loki frowned when sent an irritated glare his way. "Keep it in the living room, huh?" Tony said, flicking a hand in that direction.

"Why?" he challenged, speaking more loudly than he usually did. "They don't have the same rules you guys do."

"I don't care what you  _think_  their rules are, kiddo." He beckoned them both over, waiting at the end of the hall with Loki beside him. "Natasha would skin you  _and_  us alive if she saw you going into Ana's room. Stick to the public areas, okay?" He gave his son's shoulder a nudge as the two wandered back toward them.

"Hello, Anastasia," Loki greeted as she followed Sebastian and leaned up on her tiptoes to kiss his cheek then Tony's.

"Hi," she said softly. "Come on, Bash. Let's get a soda. The coolers are outside in the backyard. Mama's in the kitchen," she said to Loki before tugging on Sebastian's sleeve and pulling him away.

"Thank you," he murmured to Tony once they were far enough away.

"For what…?" Tony mumbled back, lifting his phone again. "You would have done the same."

"Yes. But he would be made a much bigger scene if it was I who had said something. As it is, he likely thinks I made you do it." He lowered his head, frowning hard, and felt Tony's eyes on him.

"He'll get past this phase, Loki. Eventually," he added with a lazy shrug.

"Loki! You're here. Give me a hand?" Clint popped his head out from the kitchen and quickly disappeared again.

"I'll be right there." He smiled at his old friend, but when he looked back at his husband again, it was gone. "You're here physically, Anthony. Try to enjoy yourself mentally…please?"

Before Tony got the chance to respond, Loki walked away.

* * *

Sif wandered around the party like a lost child searching for her parents in a crowd. She recognized a few faces here and there from some of the school events she had been to for Sebastian. But she wasn't confident enough to approach them, afraid she would get someone's name wrong. She could make a hundred entrees from scratch in one busy night without once looking at instructions, yet she was terrible at remembering a person's name.

Added to that, it was exhausting sometimes talking to people who were more familiar with Tony and Loki than her and Loki. To have to explain to the uninitiated that while she birthed Jazz and Audrey, they did not know her as their mother, was a difficult thing and at times awkward. To them she was just Aunt Siffy. And there was always an uncomfortable moment that followed. Most people, other mothers in particular, didn't understand how not being a mother to Jazz and Audrey didn't bother her. No matter how she explained it, she always came off cold and heartless, when really it was the most selfless thing she had ever done.

And people also seemed to forget that she was still a mother. It wasn't an easy decision to let Sebastian go and live full-time with his fathers. She just really wanted him to grow up with his siblings. And, she knew very well, living in a small apartment in North Hollywood wasn't ideal. Nor was the amount of time he would have spent alone as Sif mostly worked evenings and often on Saturdays.

And anyway, it all seemed to be working out wonderfully. Sif got to spend nearly every weekend with her son and was at Loki and Tony's for every holiday and birthday, and the couple was vigilant about including her in everything, so there wasn't very much she missed out on.

Coming to the house late meant by the time Sif got there, people were sitting with whom they wanted to talk with. After grabbing herself a beer, Sif settled by herself on the steps leading to the second floor bonus room that Natasha and Clint let the kids use as a toy room. She was in relative darkness, so most who passed by didn't even take notice of her. But when she spotted a gangly, dark-haired boy pass by, she pounced.

"Hey, you!"

A rarely seen smile curved Sebastian's lips when he recognized who had called to him. "Mama…?"

Standing on the bottom step, making her a few inches taller, Sebastian was still almost as tall as her, as she held open her arms to give him a hug. "Baby, stop growing." She pulled back and cupped his lean face. "Were you this tall the last time I saw you?" She pressed a kiss to his cheek when he just laughed shyly. "Come sit with me for a bit so we can catch up."

Sif stepped up a few steps and Sebastian climbed up to settle next to her. "How long have you been here?"

"Oh, for awhile now. I saw you outside with Ana on the swings, but I didn't want to interrupt. You looked like you were in a deep conversation. What's going on there?"

He lowered his head, his face hidden by the sweep of black hair falling over it, but not before Sif saw his cheeks go pink. "Nothin'…" he muttered, barely parting his lips.

"Nothing? Please. You two have been inseparable since you were in diapers. It only got worse—or should I say easier—when we moved closer. So?" She bumped her shoulder to his. "Have you kissed her yet?"

"Mama!" He hunched into himself, trying to hide his reddened face. "Stop it."

Sif laughed deeply, trying to catch her breath, and wrapped her arm around him, hugging him close. "Okay, okay,  _elskling_. You know you can talk to me about it, right? I'm an excellent resource on the subject of girlfriends."

The young boy scoffed lightly and the color started to slowly fade from his cheeks. "Yeah, I know."

"But I will understand if you're more comfortable going to your father." She brushed the hair hanging over his face away with her fingers, not noticing the unhappy face he made. "Either one of them, actually. They have both wooed many in their day. Though, I'd steer clear of Tony's methods," she said with a small laugh. "His way was more for short-term involvements than Loki's."

Sebastian said nothing for a moment then lifted his green eyes to hers. "Am I coming over next weekend?"

She pouted softly. "I'm afraid not, love. I've got to work all day next Saturday. The restaurant is hosting some reality star's baby shower." She gave a roll of her eyes.

"Can I come and help, like last time? I can cut stuff up. You know I'm good with a knife." She smiled, a little sadly, at Sebastian's excitement.

"Sorry, baby. Not this time. But I've got you the weekend after that and I will see you on Halloween. Have you got your costume yet?" Disappointment apparent, Sebastian only shook his head. "Hey…" Sif curled a finger under his chin, lifting his face. "Why so down? I've got big plans for us when you come," she said excitedly, a big smile on her face.

He frowned a little. "Did you tell Pop?"

"No, I've not had a chance yet. Why do you ask?"

He jerked a shoulder. "I don't know if he'll let me do anything fun."

She laughed again. "Why wouldn't he let you have fun?"

"Because he's grounded."

They both looked up to see Loki, arms crossed and leaning against the wall the stairs were set next o. Sebastian's face fell into a pout and Sif dropped her arm from him, smiling at Loki. "Oh? What'd you do?" she asked her son. His eyes traveled to her before focusing on Loki.

"Tell her," he encouraged with a nod to Sif. Sebastian remained tight-lipped.

"Talk to you later, mama," he murmured before reaching over to place a light kiss to his mother's cheek and quickly made his escape.

Sif chuckled softly. "What was that about?"

Loki sighed and moved to take Sebastian's spot next to Sif. "That…is what we have been dealing with lately. Well, mostly just me."

"You mean he's been behaving like that at home?"

"Home, school, everywhere…" he sighed. "I cannot seem to get him to have a normal conversation with me without us both getting angry and frustrated. He does not want to spend any time with me and he gets very moody with me, very quickly."

Sif's brows drew together. "And Tony? Is he like this with him?" She frowned further thinking this was so unlike the bubbly little boy he used to be, who was once so attached to his father.

"No," Loki answered quietly with a shake of his head.

In that single word, Sif heard a million things. She reached out and took Loki's hand, lacing their fingers together. "I'm sure it is just a phase, darling."

He grinned, weakly, and kissed her fingers. "That's what Anthony keeps telling me."

"And think! He's only twelve. We still have the teen years to look forward to." Loki chuckled, groaned, and then dropped his head to her shoulder, letting her pet him. "What did he do?"

"Hmm…?"

"To get grounded," she clarified.

"Oh." Loki straightened and released her hand, pushing his hands through his hair. "It wasn't just one thing, really. He was rude to Audrey, sassed me, and swore at me—which I blame you for." He leaned back and aimed a long finger at her.

Sif laughed and pressed a hand to her chest. "Me?"

"Yes. I told you over and over to watch what you said around him in Norwegian."

"What did he say?"

" _Faen dette_." He laughed harder than he should have when her mouth fell open and her eyes went wide.

"Oh, he is  _so_  grounded." She shook her head in disbelief as Loki's laughter slowly died. "So is that what's going on with you and Tony?"

Loki blinked but didn't look at her. "What?"

She grinned softly. "I'm not blind, Loki. I've been here for a bit. I've watched you avoid each other all night. And while you busy yourself in the kitchen, he wanders around, barely talking to anyone, and watching you like a hawk. Is it Sebastian? Or something else?"

Loki was quiet for a beat before turning to her with a brilliant smile. "There's nothing going on, darling. Thankfully, we're on the same page with Sebastian."

Sif eyed him closely, but Loki had always been skilled at hiding the truth, and she couldn't see anything in his eyes to give him away. "Are you sure?"

"Yes, but I thank you for your concern."

She let it go, but suspected there was something else going on. Tony and Loki had always been publicly affectionate, no matter who was around or where they were; Loki's hand was on Tony's knee or in his hand, and similarly, Tony's fingers were always toying with Loki's hair or hung loosely from one of his belt loops. They were like magnets, finding and fusing to each other in any crowd. She didn't believe Loki for one hot minute, but she knew when not to push.

"Loki. Take him."

Sif chuckled as Loki jumped when Natasha shoved a baby in his face. He calmed, smiled, and took him, resting the tiny bundle against his knees as his dark aquamarine eyes wandered toward Sif and a chubby little hand reached for her.

"What's wrong?" he asked distractedly, making cooing noises at the baby.

"Clint's just about burning the damn hamburger patties. I need to go rescue them. Here, feed him for me, yeah?" She shoved a bottle and a blanket into Sif's hands and ran off before either of them could ask any more questions.

"All right…" Loki lowered the two-month old, who looked much bigger than that, so he rested comfortably on his legs and took the items from Sif, shaking the bottle a little.

"Is this the new baby?"

Loki made a face. "Of course it is, you ninny. Siflena, meet Alexander Dane Barton. They call him Xander."

"Do you have a death wish?" she asked with a sweet smile, poking the baby's cheek and tummy to make him laugh. "I told you to stop calling me that."

"But it's such a pretty name." He laughed at the look aimed his way and shifted to move Xander to cradle him in his arm, grunting with the effort. "This isn't working. I need to move. Sitting on a step is not very conducive to feeding a baby." He stood carefully, and climbed down before holding out his hand for the blanket.

"Loki…I'll talk to Sebastian, okay? I don't like what I'm hearing."

Loki shrugged, rocking Xander lightly when he fussed. "Do what you feel is necessary, darling. He will inevitably think I put you up to it, but he is your son, too. I'll see you later." He rushed off, blowing her a kiss, when the baby fussed even more.

Sif sighed, cupped her cheek in her hand, and people watched for a moment. She decided to get another beer, since the one she had had gone warm, and descended the steps. She took one from one of the many coolers lined up outside in the backyard and upon reentering the house, spotted Tony standing near the staircase she had just abandoned. And, again, his eyes were locked on Loki.

She watched him, amused at the sight, for a moment, and then saw the blonde sidle up to him. She quickly glanced at Loki and bit her lip trying not to laugh at the dark look came over his face. Amazing how that villainous glare made him even more handsome. She saw the blonde lay a hand on Tony, and with a roll of her eyes, a smile across her lips, Sif set out to rescue him.

* * *

Tony crept around the house, doing his best to avoid having to actually have a conversation with anyone. He wasn't being antisocial—that was usually Loki's territory. His mind was just occupied with the whole London situation.

Like most business matters, he left the hiring of management for the company to Pepper, and she usually did a phenomenal job, hiring the best of the best. Not that he was blaming her for the mistreatment of the London employees; you can't always tell who can be bought and will become corrupt. He was working with Pepper to find replacements as quickly as possible and to get the employees what they wanted before anyone mentioned the word "strike."

That was what Loki didn't seem to understand, he thought, watching as his husband chatted with Clint and Natasha in the kitchen. If it did come to the employees going on strike, it was Tony who had to fly over and settle everything in person. Leaving right now, so soon after just returning from Tokyo? Not so awesome. Especially with tensions between him and Loki only being exacerbated by the tight race Loki and Sebastian were in to see who could drive him crazy first.

Tony's chocolate brown eyes did a quick search, locating his oldest out in the backyard, swinging lazily on the swing set beside Ana and kicking a soccer ball at Jazz as he ran around with Rowan, Audi, and the other kids. He wished he knew what was going on with that kid. He used to laugh and smile so much; infectiously so. He tried to think if there was something that had happened to bring on the change, but admittedly, Tony wasn't around enough to know everything.

Keeping on the move, and one eye on Loki, Tony moved outside to grab a Coke. He told himself he wouldn't drink any alcohol. He had honestly hoped to have a good time with Loki tonight, out with friends, free of work and cleaning the house and homework. But, as seemed to be the case as of late, every time he tried to get a moment with Loki, there was always an interruption. He couldn't catch a break.

He made his way back to the door and glanced back at the kids one more time. He caught the dark look on Sebastian's face as one of the boys around his and Ana's age approached her.  _Hmm_ … Maybe that was a clue to the problem.

Inside, Tony looked for Loki, but couldn't find him. He stopped and chatted with Clint for awhile, asking about the baby and work. He didn't know how long they had been talking, but he had clearly, unintentionally, distracted the man when he realized the hamburger patties on their indoor grill were burning. Once Tony spotted Natasha, he made himself disappear, not wanting to be in the path of her notorious wrath.

He made his way through the family room and back around to the front of the house, near the entryway and the stairs. That was when he finally saw Loki. He was sitting on one of the sofas, his back to the backyard, cradling Xander, the new baby, and bottle-feeding him.

There was something about watching his husband with the baby that made a comforting warmth fill his chest. A part of him wished they could go back to when Jazz was that age and start over, fix what went wrong before it did. Then there was the other part, full of so much love for that stubborn man, who wanted to cross the room and simply kiss their problems away.

The baby grabbed at Loki's hair, making the man chuckle and he turned his head to kiss his little fingers instead. And Tony nearly swooned.

"Tony?"

He jolted a little at the soft voice, and from being pulled from his thoughts, and said, "What?" a little too loudly. He caught Loki's gaze briefly before facing the blonde woman in a form-fitting red dress who had spoken to him. "I mean, yes. Yes, I'm Tony. Hi. I don't think we've met."

The woman smiled, her teeth too white to be real, and held out her hand. Not for a shake, but fingers down like a pope waiting for his ring to be kissed. "Sherry."

Tony just shook her fingers anyway. "Hello, Sherry."

"You're Jazz's father, yes?"

He crossed his arms and leaned against the doorjamb again. "One of them, yes. And you…?"

Sherry chuckled, tilting her head. "I'm Noah's mother."

"Ah, transfer, right?" He recalled Jazz going on and on the other night at dinner about the new kid, Noah, and how he had the coolest video games and clothes and most high-tech cell phone. He remembered sharing a look with Loki on that one. Initially, he was insulted by the comment because it wasn't a StarkPhone. But then the thought occurred to him: what the hell does an eight year old need with a cell phone?

Sherry smiled, let out a trill of a laugh, and placed a hand to her chest—something else Tony could tell right away was fake. "Yes, we just moved out here from upstate New York."

"Oh." Tony's eyes darted toward the living room. "What brought you out here?" He tensed at the way Sherry eyed him.

"Divorce," she answered in a hushed whisper, like it was a dirty word.

"…Oh. Sorry to hear that."

Sherry shrugged a shoulder and grinned. "We're better off; he was cheating. Anyway, Noah came home the other day jabbering about Jazz this and Jazz that and then he mentioned that he was the son of Tony Stark." She smiled flirtatiously at him. "When I heard you would be here tonight, I just  _had_  to come and talk to you. And tell you that I believe our fathers knew each other. Or their paths crossed at one point."

He nodded like he was interested in hearing the story; he wasn't. "Is that so? Well, I'm not all that familiar my dad's acquaintances. He was practically an acquaintance to  _me_ ," he said with a chuckle.

Sherry belatedly shared the chuckle. "My mother always used to tell me stories about you."

Tony's smile faded and he frowned at her. "Excuse me?"

Sherry was oblivious. "She wanted me to go to the same university that you went to—even though I was a few years behind. She wanted me to find you and marry you," she added with what he recognized as a seductive chuckle. It made him wince a little.

He cocked a brow and narrowed his eyes when she daringly laid a hand on his arm. He laughed politely and moved just so, so her hand fell away from him. "Well…I hope you went. It's a great school. And I will always cherish the time I spent there. Especially since it's where I met my  _husband_."

He tried not to laugh at the awkward smile that froze on her face. "I'm sorry? I could've sworn you just said 'husband.'"

Tony smiled smugly. "I did. And if you take a gander off to your right at the gorgeous black-haired man burping an infant, you would see him."

Sherry frowned in confusion and did as he said, her face dropping at the sight of Loki, looking right at her, his green eyes blazing. "The-the tall one?"

"Mm-hmm." Tony looked at him and grinned. "Cute, isn't he?"

Sherry chuckled nervously. "Um…ha. I thought you were—"

"Tony, may I borrow you for a moment?"

Relief flooded through Tony when Sif popped up by his side. He recognized that look on Loki's face; they were both jealous men and didn't like when anyone—male or female—tried to make a play for what they considered  _theirs_. If he was honest, he kind of basked in the knowledge that Loki cared enough to still get jealous. "Sif!" He wrapped an arm around her, purposely pulled her close, and pressed a kiss to her hair. "Hello, beautiful. Have you met…? Sorry, sweetie, remind me again."

Sherry blinked big, brown eyes at him. "Sherry."

"Sherry! She just moved here from upstate New York," Tony explained.

"Oh, did you? It's such a lovely city, though I only lived there a few years before moving out here with the boys." She smiled and gave Tony a squeeze.

Sherry chuckled again, but it was the kind of chuckle women gave in the presence of another woman they felt threatened by. "I'm sorry, and you are?"

"Sif Mortensen," she said, simultaneously offering her hand. Sherry barely shook it. "If you've seen the tall, skinny, broody boy, he belongs to me."

"Oh, where are my manners?" Tony playfully chastised himself and held out a hand toward the blonde woman. "Sherry here is Noah's mom; he's in Jazz's grade." Sif nodded, playing along, knowing Tony very well. "And Sif here, well, this amazing thing is the mother of my children."

Sherry's eyes darted between them. Sif bit back a laugh and she and Tony smiled brightly at the blonde's confusion. She aimed a finger in Loki's direction. "I thought you said you were married to—"

"Oh, I am."

Sif gave him another squeeze. "See, Tony and Loki dated in college. But they broke up for…how long was that, darling?" She turned her face to his.

"Nine, almost ten years," he answered.

"Right. And during the time they were apart, Loki and  _I_  had a brief relationship, and that produced Bash."

"Yeah, and then  _they_  broke up and around the time Bash was…four?" he looked to Sif for the answer. She nodded and confirmed he was four. "Four, Loki and I got back together and got ourselves hitched. And Mother Theresa over here, she offered to be the oven for our other buns. She and I had Jazz together and—"

"Loki and I had Audrey," she finished.

"It's a little confusing, but…we're a modern family." He smiled widely again.

Sherry's eyes continued to move between them, but she was otherwise frozen, her mouth hanging open. Sif's laugh bubbled up and slipped through her lips.

"Come, darling. I must show you something."

Tony chuckled too. "Nice meeting you, Sherry. I'm sure we'll see you around." Keeping his arm around Sif, Tony turned them and they walked away laughing.

* * *

Loki watched Tony talking with the blonde woman, and quietly seethed. He knew flirting when he saw it. And Tony let her touch him. Xander began to paw at him, fussing as Loki burped him, so he stood to walk with him.

He had wandered toward the kitchen, setting Xander's very padded bottom on the counter just above the stove where Natasha was stirring rice pilaf. "Natasha. That woman in red. Who is she?"

Natasha glanced up, her mossy green eyes searching for red and spotted Sherry. "Oh. That's Sherry. She just moved here from…somewhere back east. Recently divorced and—"

"On the prowl?" he finished sarcastically. Natasha laughed drawing his attention.

"Is she hitting on Tony or something? She's a bit much, and I've seen her in action. She hasn't come after my man yet. But if she does, she's dead."

"And you laugh at me?" Natasha only cocked a brow.

"Baby, everything's done," Clint said as he rushed over. "We're just waiting for the rice."

"It's done." Natasha gave the rice one last stir and covered it with a clear lid. "Loki, hon, can you put him down? I'll save you a plate."

"Sure…" Loki hefted Xander into his arms again, mindful of his head, and wound his way through the people crowding the living room, smiling and stopping here and there so people could fawn over the baby. He finally made it to the boys' bedroom—what was once the room he used to stay in—and carried Xander to his crib, laying him down and settling his blanket around him. Xander cooed a little, flailing his arms and kicking out his legs, as he almost smiled, toothlessly, up at Loki.

Loki smiled back at him, resting his elbow on the railing of the crib and cradling his chin in his hand. He almost missed his babies being this young, this tiny, depending on him and Tony to do everything for them. He loved all three of them with every piece of his heart, but Sebastian's behavior was growing increasingly frustrating, Jameson didn't seem to be able to  _not_  get into trouble, and Audrey was on her way to being a bully, if the reports from her teacher meant anything.

Sometimes he toyed with the idea of approaching Sif for another child. He would enjoy having another baby in the house. And it wasn't as if they didn't have the room. But then his children remind him of what would inevitably happen. He wasn't good enough as a son and perhaps now he wasn't good enough as a father. And it would only be another child Tony wasn't around to see much of.

Thinking of Tony made Loki think of him and that woman again and he frowned, letting Xander play with his fingers. That woman clearly wanted to do more than talk to Tony. And Tony was his usual overly friendly self, he was sure, though he couldn't hear what was being said between them. Morbidly, Loki couldn't help but think of what Tony was like when he  _wasn't_  just a few feet away.

He would be lying if he didn't admit to wondering, on those nights Tony came home when everyone was already asleep and the trips he often took to New York and other far off places, if there was someone else. With the way things were going between them, no matter the moment they shared just two nights before, Loki couldn't exactly fault him. Their marriage was falling apart before his very eyes and he hadn't the slightest idea how to stop it.

Mostly, because he blamed himself.

"Hey." Loki jolted upright and Tony quickly apologized. "I was just coming to get you for dinner."

"Yes. Thank you." Loki breathed out slowly, pressing a hand to his racing heart, as Tony wandered over to the crib and looked down at Xander. Loki watched him draw a finger down Xander's cheek. "He's adorable, isn't he?"

"Yeah, he is." Tony smiled, chuckled softly. "God, when did Jazz stop being this small?"

Loki grinned, remembering the big-eyed, chubby-cheeked boy. "I don't think Jameson was ever this small." He continued to watch Tony as he played with Xander. "Do you ever think about…adding another limb to our family tree?"

Tony lifted his head. "Another baby? Hmm…not seriously, no. Isn't Sif…I mean, she's beautiful and healthy, but she's in her mid-thirties now and who knows if she can even get pregnant again. Do you think about it?"

Loki was suddenly unsure and just shrugged his shoulder. "Sometimes…" he answered softly. Tony was about to respond, but Audrey burst into the room, as was becoming her habit.

" _Pappa_ , daddy, Auntie Natasha said…" she looked up, as if the words were written on the ceiling. "Get your butts out here!" She giggled at her words and bolted when Tony ran for her.

With a heavy sigh and long look back at the crib, Loki followed them out.


	4. Accusations and Free Therapy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Tony misses an important family event, Loki questions him — or rather accuses him — about how he uses his time away from home. It sets off an argument that sends Tony fleeing to New York to hide and think. Though distracting Pepper from her work duties, she steps in as amateur therapist for Tony.

Talk about a shitty day. Everything work-wise had been dying down for a bit, but then today it all went haywire. Days like this made Tony wish he could just wash his hands of it all. He knew he had an obligation to the company, but wasn't his commitment to his family more important? He wanted to take a few days off, and just relax with his kids, maybe take them to the beach or spend the day at Disneyland. And he really wanted to take Loki away, just the two of them, and remind himself how lucky he was to have such a great man in his life. A great and sexy man. One of their nights of marathon sex seemed to be in order. It had been much, much too long.

When he walked into the house, it was once again dark and eerily quiet. He was starting to forget what his house looked like bright with sunlight and noisy with kids screaming, laughing, and yelling at each other. He would rather deal with a whiny kid with muddy shoes than a whiny businessman in a suit any day.

"Late night at work?"

"Jesus!" Tony gasped as a lamp flickered on in the living room, pressing a hand to his chest. Loki was sitting in the chair beside it, hands resting on the arms, legs spread as if he had been sitting there for some time. "Loki. Baby, you scared me."

"Sorry," he said, not sounding the least bit apologetic.

"What are you doing up? Isn't it past your bedtime?" Tony set down his briefcase at the end of the sofa and smiled softly at Loki. He didn't return the smile.

"It was getting later and later. I wanted to make sure you came home."

Tony chuckled and began to empty his pockets. "Of course I would come home. I would've called if I had decided to stay at the office."

"And how was work?"

Tony made a derisive noise, checking a receipt from his take-out lunch that he had eaten at his desk before crumpling it and adding it to the pile on the side table. "Crazy, as usual."

Loki was silent for a moment before he asked quietly, "Did Jarvis send you any reminders today?"

Tony paused, moving slowly to face Loki. Well, that didn't bode well. "Yeah, he tried but…like I said things were crazy." Loki didn't respond or even move but to purse his lips. "Loki, what's going on?"

Loki sighed and, slowly, got to his feet. "Anthony, I'm only going to ask you this once. And I want you to understand that I am not pleased I even have to ask the question." Tony waited, anxious, but already feeling himself growing angry. "Are you having an affair?"

Tony stared motionless for the briefest of moments before he laughed softly, with no trace of humor, pressing a finger to the corner of his eye. "Are you being serious right now?"

"Please don't laugh at me," he whispered.

"I have to, Loki, or I might get really pissed off right now," he replied, his voice rising, his teeth nearly clenched together. His hands fisted at his sides and he could feel his heart start to beat faster.

"Keep your voice down. Just answer the question."

"No!" he shouted, unable to stop himself, satisfaction coursing through him when Loki blanched and swallowed. "I am not having a fucking affair, goddamn it! What I  _ am _ having is a crisis at work, all right?"

"Anthony…"

"Why would you ask me that?" His breath was coming fast, making his chest rise and fall quickly, and he had to force himself to calm down.

Loki shrugged, shook his head and it all had a very sad mood about it. "For many reasons."

"Why?" Tony demanded. "Because I'm at the office late once in awhile?"

"Once in awhile?" Loki scoffed, seemingly finding his voice again. "Anthony, you've spent more time at your office than you have at home in the last three months."

"Maybe because no one at work lays a guilt trip on me, Loki." Where the hell did that come from? All of Tony's frustrations came bubbling to the surface and he could feel his temper rising to a dangerous point. He was on the verge of losing control and couldn't very well control what was coming out of his mouth. He glared at Loki, saw him frown.

"I do not put —"

"Maybe because I get  _ some _ credit for trying my best," he growled out, taking one step forward. Loki did the same. “Even from Pepper.” His eyes darted down briefly seeing Loki’s fingers curl into his palms tightly.

"I am not the only one who needs you here, Anthony."

"There you go! Right there! Guilt trip!" He pointed out, flinging a hand at Loki, as he took another step forward.

_ "You missed your son's concert!" _

Tony froze. Quickly, his mind raced through his mental calendar, trying to remember what concert, what date it was — what fucking month was it? "…What? What concert? I don't — shit." Tony pressed a hand to his forehead and fell to the sofa.

Loki let out a long, harsh breath, remaining standing, his fingers uncurling and twitching at his side. "Tonight was Jameson's first performance in the choir."

Realizing what he had missed, Tony sighed and covered his face with both hands. It physically hurt him to think he had let down Jazz. "Oh, shit," he mumbled to himself.

"Perhaps you should think about not muting Jarvis when he is trying to get a message — or several, rather — through to you."

Tony dropped his hands and shot a look up at Loki. "Seriously, Loki? I feel bad enough. I don't need you saying shit like that."

Loki's brows bobbed as he met Tony's heated gaze. "Oh, did you hear me? I hadn't realized you could." He took one step back, shifting into a minorly defensive position, when Tony bolted up, eyeing him sharply.

"You are not helping."

"I was not aiming to," Loki answered indignantly, one of those condescending eyebrows cocked high over a narrowed eye.

Tony scoffed impatiently. "What do you want me to say? You want me to say I fucked up? You're right; I did. I got wrapped up trying to keep my damn company from falling apart, okay? Sue me! The last thing I need is to come home and have you jumping down my throat about it. I don't need that shit from you, Loki." He turned away from Loki and started out of the room.

"If I did not do that, Anthony, you would not have the damndest idea of anything that went on in this house."

Tony stopped again and moved back to the end table beside the sofa and began to snatch up his phone and the other items he had earlier taken out of his pockets and stuffed them back in. He barely spared Loki a glance. "Just because I'm not here doesn't mean I don't know what's going on with my kids."

He started away again and knew Loki was following. And he felt him come to a sudden halt. "Are they the only ones you care for then?"

Frustrated more than he ever thought he could be Tony let out another sharp breath, this time dropping his head. "That’s not what I meant. You know that's not true, Loki."

"Do I?" he asked in a broken voice.

_ Great _ , Tony thought. Pile on the guilt with the frustration and the anger and the resentment already coursing through him. His chest was aching with emotions he couldn't define, his eyes burning with hot tears he didn't want to shed. Finally, he just shook his head and gave up. "I can't deal with this right now," he decided suddenly. He continued forward and plucked his keys from where he had hung them just moments before when he walked in.

"Anthony. Where are you going?" He could hear the panic in Loki's voice, but couldn't bring himself to care at the moment.

"The airport," he muttered. "I'm leaving for New York tomorrow anyway. I'll just be a little early."

"Anthony, please don't leave…" The end of the sentence hung in the air. They both knew the end of it was  _ me _ .

Tony squeezed his eyes shut, hating Loki in that moment for making him the bad guy when he was the one falsely accusing him of having an affair. "Loki, I am too pissed off to be here right now. I can't...I can't be near you right now. I'll be back on Monday."

Loki was panicking more and his voice was thicker, tighter, when he spoke again. "Th-that's three days awa — Anthony, please…"

" _ Loki _ ." He said it forcefully, at the door, one foot out already, and Loki stopped. "I'm fine.  _ We _ are fine. I just…if I stay…" his voice broke and he sighed with the thought of what would happen if he stayed. "If I stay, all we're gonna do is fight. And I'm tired. I'm  _ tired  _ of fighting with you."

Long, slim fingers curled around the biceps of one arm. "We don't have to fight. Please…stay with me — with  _ us _ this weekend. Jameson and Audrey have soccer games. We can —"

"Loki. Let me go."

Eventually, fingers reluctantly fell from his arm. Fighting tears, and avoiding looking back at Loki, Tony forced himself to walk out.

* * *

After Happy made sure his daughter, Emma, was awake, dressed for daycare, and being fed, he made his way back up to his bedroom, where he found his wife sitting on their bed and focused on the cell phone in her hand. Sometimes he just really wanted to throw that thing over the balcony. "Sweetie, are you ready for breakfast?"

"None today, hon," Pepper responded, never taking her eyes from the device. She sighed and looked up at him as he entered the room further. "Tony's here."

"Already?" He checked the nearest clock, then double-checked the time on his watch. "I thought he wasn't supposed to come in until later."

"Me, too. But I've got a message saying he came into the building at five-sixteen this morning. And I have a voicemail from a very distraught-sounding Loki." She slipped her tan colored heels onto her feet and stood, smoothing the matching skirt.

Happy frowned. "Oh, no. You think something happened?"

"There's only one way to find out." She gave him a quick kiss and started out of the room. "Tell Emma I'll see her at dinner."

"Okay. Love you!" He shouted after her.

"Love you too!" Pepper shouted back and stepped into the elevator. She rode down to the level where Tony's lab was still housed, protected now by a wall of blacked out windows and could only be entered by special code. Tony did most of his lab work in California now, but he kept a few projects running in New York to keep him occupied when he visited. Pepper and Happy were the only two that had personalized codes for the lab, aside from Tony, and she entered it now as she approached the door. It didn't work. Frowning slightly, she tried it again. And, again, it didn't work. There was a loud beep heard overhead and she pressed her fingers to her ears.

_ "What do you want, Potts?" _ Tony's voice came through the intercom from inside the lab. She could hear his loud as all hell AC/DC playing in the background.

"That's Mrs. Hogan to you. Turn that noise down!" She waited for him to do it and once it was quiet, she continued, "Why doesn't my code work?"

_ "Because I disabled it. And Happy's, too, in case you were wondering. I'm kinda in the middle of something here." _

"Open the door, Tony."

_ "Not until you tell me what you want. And even then, I promise nothing." _

She sighed and impatiently tapped her high-heeled foot in frustration. She didn't really have time to deal with Tony and his childish antics today. Stark Industries was hosting another one of its charity galas the next night — the reason Tony was in town — and there was still a lot of planning to be done. "I need to talk to you. Open the damn door."

_ "See, I'm not much for listening today. Why don't you just talk to me from there? This way, it's easier for me to pretend I'm listening and continue to work." _

Pepper crossed her arms. "Fine, why don't I start with the message from a near-hysterical Loki I got late last night?" She had counted to five before the door clicked and popped open just a bit. Smugly, she pushed it open the rest of the way, and stomped in. She froze before she nearly tripped.

Spread out across the floor of the lab, were the pieces of something that had once been something else. She carefully stepped around them, making her way toward one of the tables Tony was standing near. He turned, wiping his black-smeared hands on a small faded red towel, just as she stopped a few feet away.

"What did that used to be?"

"A laptop," he answered, hopping up onto the table. Pepper's jaw dropped. "What? It's  _ my  _ laptop. And it was running really slow."

She continued to stare then tilted her head to one side. "Okay, what's going on?"

He shrugged stiffly. "Nothing."

Pepper waved a hand over the mess. " _ This _ is not 'nothing,' Tony. The last time you did something like this was after Jarvis — human Jarvis, that is — died in his sleep."

His face fell at the mention of his old friend's sudden, but not unexpected, passing. He was in his late seventies, after all. "What did I do then?"

"You took apart your father's Mercedes." The sad look on his face cleared but he looked away. Pepper stepped forward, her hands folded together in front of her. "We weren't expecting you until later, Tony. What's going on?"

Tony brought his eyes back to hers, stared for a long moment. "What did Loki say?"

Pepper bit back another sigh. If she showed any signs of frustration or tried to push, Tony would close up immediately and she would never know why he was early. "He asked me to let him know that you got here safely — which I've done. He also said you left last night pretty upset."

He scoffed shortly. "That's putting it mildly."

"What happened?"

Tony laughed harshly, another with no trace of humor. "It has nothing to do with work."

Pepper grinned wryly. "I'm guessing it has a little something to do with it." Tony didn't respond and she started to move even closer. "I told you. I told you to cut back on your hours. I told you to let me handle London."

Tony lowered his head, shaking it. "I can't do that, Potts."

She let the name slide this time. There were more important matters on the table for discussion. "Why? Because your name is on the building?"

"Because my name is on the  _ company _ ," he said vehemently.

She did sigh this time. "You have a family to look after."

"So do you," he pointed out.

"I have one child; you have three. And I live where I work; you know that's easier and much more convenient than living thirty minutes away or driving an hour in traffic, am I right?" He grunted softly, gritting his teeth. "Tony, talk to me. Just tell me what —"

"He thinks I'm cheating on him," he admitted.

Pepper was a little taken by surprise, but she didn't know why. She had supposed if all the crap  _ she  _ had put them through all those years ago hadn't broken them up, nothing could. A thought occurred to her and she chewed the inside of her cheek, wondering if she should even ask. "Are you?" His eyes flashed instantly to hers, hard and glaring, and she immediately thought,  _ Oops _ . Then she relaxed and angled her head again. "Oh, come on, Tony. I  _ know  _ you love him, but it's not outside the realm of possibilities." She jolted a little when Tony jumped off the table, landing loudly on his feet, and stomped around the table. "Is that why you left?" she asked softly.

Again, he didn't answer. Watching him slam things around, pouting and glaring at everything, Pepper pulled her phone from her pocket and moved to the table.

"Okay. That's it. I'm cancelling your appearance tomorrow and sending you home."

Tony's head shot up. "What?"

"You need to fix this," she said between glances at her phone. "And you're not going to be of any use to me walking around with that look on your face. So go home, take a week off, and fix whatever is wrong with Loki."

"Pepper. Don't. I need this."

She paused at his soft tone and lowered the phone to look at him. "Need what?"

He lowered his eyes to the table, clenched his jaw. "This time away; I need it. Just give me the weekend."

Pepper's brows drew together. This was more serious than she initially thought. Sure they had had their little spats here and there over the years, but she had heard the stories — and heard  _ them _ — about how their little word battles always led to fierce making up. She seriously felt if Tony and Loki, two people who were more in love than any other couple she knew, couldn't make it work, what hope was there for everyone else? "Tony, I don't understand. Why would…?"

"He hurt me, okay?" he said, finally raising his head. Pepper's lips snapped together and she could see the tears glistening in his eyes. "His accusation; it hurt. Pep, he's the only —" His voice broke and he took a moment to gather himself. "He's the only one I've been with that I  _ haven't _ cheated on. That I've never  _ thought _ about cheating on. So…for  _ him  _ to even think that I would…"

Her heart aching for both of her friends, Pepper silently moved around the table and drew Tony into her arms. She held him there for a few long moments, blinking her own tears away. "When's the last time you two had some time alone?" she asked into the quiet.

Tony sniffled against her. "I don't even know. Had to be before Audi came along."

Pepper pulled back, giving his shoulders a squeeze. "I'm going to play the devil's advocate here for a second. Now, I realize he hurt you, and that it pissed you off because you thought you'd left that playboy image behind. Right?"

Tony chuckled reluctantly and wiped at his eyes. "Maybe…"

"Okay. As a neutral third party, here's what I'm seeing that  _ he _ may be feeling: you're gone a lot. And I'm guessing when you are home you make sure to focus on the kids. Or are still stuck on work. Am I close? At all?"

Tony's mouth twisted to one side. "Get to the point, Potts."

Pepper sighed, dropped her hands from him, and crossed her arms under her breasts. "Remember the night when Loki moved out from your apartment, back in D.C.?"

Tony groaned and started to turn away but Pepper stopped him. "Why are you bringing that up? Like I don't feel crappy enough already, you want to add miserable to the mix? Where the hell is my whiskey? Jarvis!"

"No, Jarvis, don't. Listen, that night you  _ were  _ miserable, but you had every right to be. You were brokenhearted because you felt like Loki was abandoning you. And remember you went on and on about him and you basically told me his whole life story?"

He scrunched his nose. "Ugh, I did? God, I suck at being brokenhearted."

Pepper laughed softly. "Do you remember what you told me?"

He stared at her blankly for a moment. "I remember a lot of the more embarrassing things I did that night. Sadly, whatever bullshit I said to you is not a part of it. But, please, Pep, feel free to remind me what a gigantic idiot I was."

"For Christ's sake," she muttered. "How you two don't live in sarcastic harmony is beyond me. Okay,” she brought her hands together, pressed palm to palm and against her lips. Like she was praying for patience. “You told me about his birth father, uh…Laffy —"

"Laufey." Tony rolled his eyes again.

"Right, him. You told me about him and Odin and how their treatment left Loki with an inherent fear of abandonment and you were pissed because that's what he was doing to you." She waited for his reaction but he just blinked and shrugged. "Do you really not see the connection I'm trying to make here? Jesus Christ, Tony, you're a goddamn genius when it comes to this…" she motioned to the floor again, "shit. Bring a little emotion into something and you're the stupidest man on the planet."

"Hey! I'd like to remind you that there was a time when  _ you  _ wanted me as your one and only, thank you very much. What does that say about you?"

She waved him off, literally, waving her hand in his face. "I was in college. We all make mistakes in college." She chuckled at the drastic drop his jaw did. "Listen, pay attention. I don't have all day to give you free therapy. I need you to be conscious of the fact that as much as you're hurting because of Loki's accusation, think of how much he's suffering because you don't give him the attention that you used to. And judging by his childhood, he might just take that a little harder than the average person. I mean, all he's got right now is three kids. And, believe me, I love my daughter, but sometimes we all need a break from being a parent to be appreciated as an adult."

Tony frowned in thought. What Pepper said made sense. Damn it. "And even  _ that's _ not going great…" he murmured to himself.

"What's not?"

"Loki and the kids."

Pepper watched him, waiting. "I'm gonna need a little more than that, Tony."

He hesitated for a moment, stretching his lips, hissing quietly. "I don't know if I should. We haven't even found time to really talk to Sif about Bash."

"Who am I gonna tell? You need to vent to someone. Go." She propped her hip up onto the table, her arms still crossed and waited.

Tony debated in his head for a bit more and decided she had a point. Again. Damn it, when did she become smarter than him? "We've just got some things going on. Loki and Sebastian keep getting into it. If Sebastian isn't ignoring him, he's talking to him with a lot more attitude than either of us like."

"Oh, goodness. Have  _ you _ talked to him?"

"I tried," he said with a shrug. "It's hard to get him to say more than two or three words. And if he does say more he's being a little shit, sassing everyone."

"Sounds familiar," she said through barely parted lips.

"Shut up."

She smiled, not taking it personally at all. "So try again. And keep trying until you wear him down. He'll talk eventually. Is it affecting his grades?"

"Nah…he's like Loki. He doesn't need to study much. Teachers said they thought he was a bit quiet, but he doesn't cause any trouble so it's not bothersome."

"Hmm…wonder what's going on?"

"I don't know," he mumbled from behind his hands, covering his face and scrubbing them over it. "I hate hearing them fight…almost as much as I hate fighting with Loki myself."

"What about the other two?"

"Jazz blew up a toilet at school." Pepper barked out a loud laugh and quickly covered her mouth. Tony laughed with her, shaking his head. "He asked Jarvis how to do it. Jarvis got grounded, too, at home. And…Loki brought up the whole skipping a grade thing again."

Pepper smiled softly. She knew how much Tony didn't want to be like his own father, and it was hard to make him see how far from Howard Stark he already was. "Tony, I know you don't want to push him, but keeping him where he's at isn't helping him any either. It's only one grade."

"I know, but…what if he gets there and he can't handle it? I don't want him feeling like he can't tell us because we pushed him to do it."

"He's a Stark; I'm sure he'll be fine." He laughed softly. "And Audrey…?"

"Jesus…my little princess is turning into a monster. She's going around the playground and pushing all the boys down. The teacher stepped out of class for a minute to talk to another teacher and when she came back in, she said that Audrey was sitting in a chair with a paper on top of her head folded up like a crown and making the other kids kneel in front of her."

Pepper's eyes went wide and she covered her mouth when she laughed. "Oh my god…"

"Exactly. And I have no idea where she got all this from." He nearly pouted when Pepper burst out laughing again, so hard she had to clutch her arm around her belly. "I didn't think it was that funny…"

"You don't know where she got it from? I'm sure it's Loki who's been giving her everything she's ever wanted every time she asks for it, right?" She continued to laugh and Tony narrowed his eyes at her, shaking his head.

"You're so…annoying. Why do I hang out with you?"

"Because you love me," she said lightly, hopping off of the table. She pulled out her phone and checked the time. "Shit. I've gotta get down to the office. Are you sure you don't want to go home? I can make excuses for you and do the speech myself."

"No…" She scowled at him as his more melancholy mood returned instantly. "I just need to…think."

With a sigh, Pepper moved around the table and started through the maze of laptop parts to the entrance to the lab. "Well, don't think too hard. And if you're going to mope about Loki, fine; just stay away from the liquor cabinet. I need you sober tomorrow. Maybe have Jarvis play your wedding video or something. Remind yourself why you pined for him for almost a decade after he left you."

"Wow…thanks for  _ that _ reminder, Pep."

"You're welcome!" She waved a hand over her head and slipped out of the lab, leaving Tony in silence. His eyes roamed over the pieces of his computer on the floor. He didn't have the energy to put that back together right now. He wanted Loki. He just wanted to see him. To sit with him, his head in his lap, those long fingers massaging his scalp. To lie down with him in his arms, feel their heartbeats slowly start to synchronize, their breaths mingle. To hear his voice, hear him say  _ Anthony _ in that way only he did.

He fisted his hand, slamming it down hard to the table, to take his mind off of the fact that his heart literally hurt, goddamn it. It had to mean something that he missed him this much even though he was pissed as hell at the man. Making his way to the entrance, Tony left the lab, and headed up to the guest room he was staying in, aiming to take a nap, since he hadn't slept in just over twenty-four hours now. Every part of him was exhausted; mind, body, heart, and soul. He just wanted everything to be okay again. Did Loki really think it would be that easy for him to be with someone else? It wouldn't.

As Tony lay his body down on top of the covers of a bed he and Loki had once made love in, he buried his face in the pillow, letting his tears soak into the cotton pillowcase. On their wedding night, which seemed so much longer than eight years ago at the moment, Loki had told Tony that he would never give him up without a fight. When he finally drifted into a heavy sleep, the lingering thought in his mind was wondering if that sentiment was still true.


	5. A Blackout, A Spa Day, An Idyllic Moment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony is miserable at the gala he’s supposed to be hosting. Missing Loki, and lamenting his absence to a stranger at the bar, he drinks himself to a blackout — and wakes up in someone else’s hotel room. Back at home, Loki wallows in self-pity when he takes a day for himself.

Ten minutes after he arrived at the event — this time at The Plaza — Tony realized he should have taken Pepper up on her offer. He initially thought a night of schmoozing and hearing people endlessly praise him for continuing his father's legacy in supporting foundations and charities and tell him how amazing he was would make him feel better, give him a big confidence boost, after the last couple of emotional days.

But it all felt so empty.

He didn't think he had ever missed Loki so much as he did at this very moment. Not even those years they were apart after college. He was half-listening, his brown eyes glazing over, to an old lady with a lot of her dead husband's money to waste, going on about how important it was to support the arts and how wonderful his speech earlier in the evening was. He smiled and nodded, but in his head he was deducing the time it would take to get his things from the tower, get the StarkJet powered up, and be home before Loki's head hit the pillow.

Then he frowned at the thought of showing up at home, earlier than expected, and what Loki's reaction might be. What if he was mad at Tony for leaving? Did he even want Tony to come home? Even if he did want Tony home, he would never admit to it.

"Do you mind if I borrow him for just a second?"

Tony snapped to attention as Pepper appeared at his side, looped her arm around his, and pulled him away before the old lady had even finished speaking. "What are you doing? Where are you taking me?"

She waited until they were alone before answering him. "If you don't snap out of this moping for Loki thing soon, I am going to slap the shit out of you." He chuckled shortly and opened his mouth to speak, but Pepper beat him to it. "You are here for work, Anthony Edward Stark."

Tony went still, his face in a frown, glaring at her. "Don't call me Anthony." That was reserved for one person and one person only.

"Stop acting like a little bitch." He blinked once then again. "I gave you an out; you chose not to take it. So get your shit together and start acting like the Tony Stark I know." She started to storm off and Tony snagged her by the arm.

"You called me a bitch. Don't do that."

She twisted her arm free from his grasp and her fist shot out, landing with a very unimpressive thump to his upper arm. "Don't act like one."

Tony watched, open-mouthed and unable to stop Pepper, as she strutted away, the clicks of her heels echoing in the large hall he now stood alone in. "I wasn't," he mumbled to no one but himself. He loosened his bowtie and made his way back into the party. He caught a whiff of someone's drink and his eyes did a quick sweep of the room. Once he spotted the bar, he headed straight for it, barely smiling and raising a hand in greeting to a few people along the way.

Like it or not, Tony always worked better with a few glasses in him. He hoped a couple of glasses of whiskey would lift his mood and get him through the rest of the night. Pepper was right in one aspect; he  _ chose _ to stay. If she really needed him to kiss some ass to get a few more dollars to one of Stark Industries many charities, he was going to have to be nice and tipsy to do it. He ordered his usual Jack Daniels, this time on ice, and sat at the end of the bar, people watching. He finished the first glass in three swallows and ordered another.

Ten minutes later, he had gone through almost four glasses. But he wasn't feeling any better yet. Instead of giving him a nice working buzz and calming his nerves, like it normally did, Tony felt even more depressed and his mind now felt clouded and cramped. His vision was playing tricks on him, too. He could have sworn he had seen Loki twice in the span of five minutes. He froze, blinked, then slumped again.  _ Make that three _ , he thought sadly. He chuckled darkly into his glass thinking how amazing it would have been if Loki had flown to New York and surprised him. He loved seeing Loki in a tux, as rare as it happened.

Loki never attended these events, simply because he hated the attention his presence brought to the couple, and took away from the purpose of the event. The cameras followed them everywhere when he was on Tony's arm, and even when he wasn't. Tony enjoyed showing him off, but Loki's innate sense to keep to himself always won out. So eventually, he just stopped going.

Having made himself feel even more depressed now, Tony curled into himself, turning his back to the crowd. He ordered yet another drink, a double this time, just as someone slid onto the stool next to him.

* * *

 

She had been watching him from across the room all night, tracking his every move since he had walked through the door. The fact that he walked in arm-in-arm with the redheaded woman, and not the husband she had expected, delighted her to no end. Things just might go her way. Hopefully, at least.

When he made his way to the bar and started downing drink after drink after drink, her smile grew that much more. She waited for him to get himself nice and drunk — as drunk as the rumored border-alcoholic could get — before slithering her way like a viper that had spotted a tasty meal through the throng of people, dressed to the nines. He looked near tears, but she assumed that was just the drink, and wondered if she would even need to spike his drink after all. She thought she might do it anyway. Just in case. He had turned away now, burying his face in his arms atop the bar, just as she neared, and ordered another drink.

_ Perfect _ , she thought.

"Dry martini," she ordered, sliding onto the stool next to him. She feigned shock at discovering him at her side. She really should have gone into acting. "My word, aren't you  _ the _ Tony Stark?" she asked in her sugary as sweet tea southern accent.

"Yep. That's me." Tony raised his hand weakly then let it plop to the bar top again. "And who are you, with the down home southern belle-ness going on?"

She chuckled softly, waiting for him to focus his bleary eyes on her, and picked up her drink to delicately sip at it. "Name's Moira," she answered breathily. Tony grinned and went back to his drink. She was a little taken aback he didn't engage her further and watched him drown himself a little bit longer. "Havin’ a rough night, sugar?"

"That…" His head wobbled when he lifted it to look at her and had to prop it up with his hand. "…Is the understatement of the year." His words slurred ever so slightly.

She sipped again at the martini. "Mm. D'you wanna talk about it, sweetie pie?"

Tony flubbed his lips. "You don't wanna listen to my boring story." She waited quietly for a moment before pretending to turn away. "How do I make him see?" He laid his hand over her wrist, keeping her at the bar, and closed his eyes tightly. "How do I make him see that he's the only thi — no, not  _ thing _ , what do you call the — person!" He shot up, blinked, and melted down again, whimpering softly. "He's my person. I just want him to see. How do I make him see?"

Moira pouted sympathetically, leaning down to his level, and laid a hand over the one still gripping her wrist on the bar. "Who we talking 'bout, sweetie?"

Tony raised bloodshot brown eyes to hers. "Loki. My love." When his eyes traveled to his near empty glass, and away from her, Moira rolled her eyes a little. "My one and only."

Moira signaled to the bartender to bring Tony another drink and one more for her then finished off her first martini. She popped the olive into her mouth and patted Tony's hand. "Tell me all about it, darlin'." She smirked a little, pushing his drink closer to him. "I'm aaaall ears."

And she did listen. She listened, for an hour, to Tony going on and on about Loki; about how much he loved him, how much he missed him, missed the way they used to be, wondering when they started drifting away from each other. And why did he let himself repeat his worst mistake, letting work come between them again. Moira listened, assured, comforted, and stored everything away for later. Until eventually Tony passed out.

* * *

Tony groaned as he came to, his head throbbing and aching so bad it brought tears to his eyes.

"Loki…" he moaned in pain, pressing the heel of one hand to his forehead. "Tell the monsters to stop making all that damn noise."

Tony continued to make unhappy sounds and grunts and rolled onto his back, wincing at the sunlight streaming in and over the bed, instantly pulling the covers over his head. Whimpering in both pain and irritation, he paused, thinking that it wasn't normal for the sun to reach their faces. That was when he heard it. It wasn't the usual racket the kids made in the morning. It wasn't Loki getting ready for the day or moving around the room. It wasn't familiar at all. A shower was running. Someone was humming. And that someone was female.

Despite the grogginess clouding his brain, Tony shot up in the bed, his heart and mind racing. He took in his surroundings, recognizing that he was in a hotel room — a fancy one, at that — and spotted the very feminine luggage piled in one corner.

_ Shit, shit, shit! What the fuck? _ He looked down at himself, horrified to find he wasn't wearing a stitch of clothing. And he choked out a gasp. "What the…what did I…? Jesus  _ Christ _ ," he muttered breathlessly in a panic.

Throwing the covers aside, and willing whoever was in the shower to stay in there for as long as possible, Tony jumped out of the bed and started searching for his clothes. He found them in a pile in the sitting room area of the hotel room, and hurriedly began to dress. His fingers and hands were clumsy trying to pull on his boxers and pants and he struggled trying to get his arm into his dress shirt. His breath came in short, desperate breaths, his heart was still beating faster than he was sure was healthy, and the pace of both spiked when the water of the shower suddenly stopped. A quick glance out of the nearest window showed Tony it was still very early, the light barely brightening over the horizon of Central Park and further off, buildings, and he wondered how long he had actually been unconscious.

_ "Tony…?" _ A southern voice sang out his name, practically dripping with honey.  _ "Are you awake yet?" _

The voice registered as sort of familiar somewhere in the back of his crowded mind, but he didn't take the time to think about it; he couldn't deal with the situation. He just had to get out, get on his plane, and get back to Loki.  _ His _ Loki — the last thing he remembered thinking about before waking up in this strange woman's hotel room. He could hear the woman moving around, and not wanting to be seen, Tony picked up his shoes from behind the couch and was ready to run. He spotted his watch and onyx cufflinks on the bedside table and quickly ran to snatch them up, too, and sprinted for the door.

In the taxi, on the way to Stark Tower, Tony made a call to get the StarkJet fired up. After that was done, he threw his head back, banging it against the seat, repeatedly. A wide range of emotions coursed through him, making him want to cry and punch something over and over until his fists hurt; dread, remorse, embarrassment, fear, and a deep hate for himself the likes of which he hadn't felt in years.

Things moved quickly once he reached the tower to collect his few things, and before he knew it, he was on his plane back to Los Angeles, back to his family. Back to Loki. He very nearly drowned himself in a decanter of whiskey. It would have been so easy and typical of him. But it also would have been the chicken shit way. He was already debating whether or not he should tell Loki what happened.  _ He _ didn't even know what happened; how the hell was he supposed to explain it?

God, he just wanted to be at home with his kids and his husband and forget this whole stupid weekend ever happened. Belatedly, he had Jarvis send a message to Pepper and Happy that he had left. Then he sat back, staring out his window for a good solid hour, silently, and not so silently, calling himself every horrible name in the book.

How could he be so stupid? No matter how angry he was with Loki, no matter how much he had felt hurt by him, his old ways of self-sabotage and self-destruction should never have surfaced. Drinking until he blacked out was his first mistake; so the liquor had to go. Again. Yes, it was true this was not the first attempt he had made to curb his drinking. But every time he had tried to do it, there was only one reason behind it: Loki.

This was it. Whatever issues between he and Loki that had been slowly creating this giant divide between them was over. He loved Loki; with every part of himself, he loved that man. Somewhere over the Midwest, Tony promised himself: when he got home, when he set eyes on that tall, pale piece of heaven on earth, he was going to show him just how much he did.

* * *

Loki breathed out slowly, his eyelids lowering slowly, and focused on his breathing, on calming his mind. It had been a long time — much too long if the way his legs were protesting his current position was any indication — since he had done any yoga or meditating. Not since Sif was pregnant with Audrey, if he was correct. But, he needed the time to himself, to think and bring some peace to his erratic mind. The only way he was going to be able to do that was to get the house to himself. So after the kids' soccer games on Saturday morning, Loki begged Natasha to take them for the night. Luckily, the kids were all riled up from winning that she didn't get a chance to grill him about why he wanted the kids gone, where Tony was, and, more importantly to him, why he was hiding behind black sunglasses. He didn't need the questions his red-rimmed and puffy eyes would inevitably bring.

Loki had had a hard enough time trying to explain that to his overly-inquisitive and sharp-eyed children before school on Friday morning and that morning before the games again. Audrey and Jazz completely bought his allergy flare up excuse, but Sebastian, Loki could tell, knew better — even if he didn't show that he cared. And, Loki suspected, Sebastian may have even heard the argument between Tony and himself the night before. Or maybe he just heard Loki up half the night, crying his eyes out because he feared that Tony wasn't ever coming back.

Loki had planned to do some yoga on Saturday, but after driving away from the field, he didn't go back to the house. He didn't go anywhere. He just got on the freeway and drove aimlessly, thinking about Tony and their fight. And his stupid mistake of accusing him of cheating. All in all, he and Tony had been together for twelve years, and while they had their moments of anger and silly tiffs over nothing, never once had either of them ever flirted with the idea of being with someone else — at least, not while they were together. It was Loki's own insecurities projecting themselves onto Tony. He was a stay-at-home dad that wasn't very interesting anymore. A part of him couldn't really blame Tony if he wanted to be with someone else.

Loki had always been very comfortable with his looks. He didn't think he was perfect, but he attracted enough men and women throughout his life to know he was better than average-looking for some people's tastes. And with Tony...well, Tony had always made him feel sexy.

Until recently, that is.

Loki thought the way his once firm and taut muscles had gone soft and loose, that his jet black hair was now marred by gray and silver strays, and that the lines around his mouth and across his forehead had deepened, made him unattractive to Tony. That the reason Tony rarely responded to him was because he had found someone else, someone younger, someone better. Somewhere in the back, and darkest part, of his mind he had wondered if that playboy he had been before Loki, and even after Loki, had ever really found any happiness with him.

When he finally did stop the car, he found himself in Ojai. They had come up here once, just the two of them, when they first moved to the west coast, and Loki remembered how relaxing and fun it had been for them. So he decided to treat himself to a facial and a massage. He thought maybe it would help get rid of his puffy eyes and help him relax. By the time he left later in the evening, he felt  _ physically _ better. But mentally and emotionally, he still felt like a total wreck.  Sleep wasn't an option. He rarely slept well when Tony was away anyway. This whole situation simply exacerbated his insomnia. But when he got to the two-story, altogether-too-quiet house, he carried himself up the steps, to their empty bedroom, and laid down anyway, on his side, staring at the empty spot beside him. Gods, when did he get so pathetic? Moping around like a lovelorn schoolgirl.

No wonder Tony found him so pathetic now.

Eventually, Loki found sleep, pulling Tony's pillow to him, finding comfort in his signature spicy scent still lingering on it. He must have dreamt of him though, for when he woke, he could feel the tracks of his tears on his cheeks and see the darkened marks left behind on the pillowcase. Determined not to be a basket case when Tony arrived home the next day, Loki got up early, made himself a simple breakfast of toast and tea, and called the Barton household to make sure his children hadn't burned the house down. After promising Audrey mashed potatoes for dinner, he pulled out his old yoga mat, cleared some space in his study and set about trying out some old yoga poses. The study was simply an extra bedroom in the corner of the house on the bottom floor, just off the kitchen, outfitted with a small writing desk, a two-seater sofa, and walls lined with overstuffed bookshelves.

Loki struggled a little at first. His body didn't seem to want to work with him, and after awhile, he decided to simply meditate, sitting in a half-Lotus position. He had been sitting for some time, his mind quiet, when a sound he was not expecting permeated his consciousness. It sounded like a garage door sliding open. Figuring it was either his imagination, or the neighbor's garage door, he shook his head, refocused his concentration.

_ "Loki?" _

His eyes opened, his lips parted. That voice sounded suspiciously like Tony's. "Anthony?" he questioned to himself quietly, unfolding his long legs.

_ "Babe? I saw your car. Are you here?" _

The heightened tension in his voice made Loki nervous and he rushed to the door of his study, hearing heavy footsteps pounding up the steps. He pulled open the door and stepped out. "Anthony?" He moved out further and the footsteps pounded back down and Tony came swinging around the railing. His eyes raked over Tony, searching for injury or, gods forbid, blood. But he seemed fine and his brows drew together. "Anthony, what are you —"

Tony raced forward and launched himself at Loki, clutching him close. Loki's body stiffened at the contact, more to steady himself than anything, and his frown deepened.

"Anthony…has something hap —"

"I love you." Tony pulled back enough to cup Loki's face between his hands then roughly pulled him down for a kiss before he could reply. "I love you…so much…I love you…" he murmured between kisses against Loki's stilled, but slightly parted lips. He was too shocked by the assault of Tony's mouth and surprise declarations of love to do much but let it happen. After a moment, he slowly, almost hesitantly, as if it would stop if he started to enjoy it, began to kiss Tony back. Tony’s response was to pull Loki even closer, slipping his hands under the over-sized gray t-shirt he wore, hands and fingers exploring a smooth, plane of flesh they had been away from for too long. "Mmm…yes…Loki…" Tony started to push forward, easing Loki back into his study. "Loki, Loki, Loki…I love you, Loki…"

Loki started to pant, unfamiliar with all the affection after so long, and mistrusting that it was real. He let Tony push him into the room, let him push him down onto the small sofa against one wall, let his mouth use his as it pleased. "A-Anthony…" he gasped softly when Tony pulled away, kneeling between his spread legs, only to roughly tug his black sweatpants and heather gray boxer briefs from his legs.

"Loki, I'm done," he said firmly, moving back up to catch his lips in more aggressive kissing. Loki awkwardly kissed him back, his arms up on either side of him, if only to keep them out of Tony's way as he moved around in a hurry to get Loki undressed.

"Done…?" Fear and confusion had his heart skipping a beat or two. Yet, the rest of his body responded just fine to Tony's attentions. His cock throbbed untouched between them, hard as it had ever been, aching already for Tony's touch.

"I'm done fighting with you," he said breathlessly, ripping his own shirt over his head, after tossing Loki's aside. He reached for Loki's arms and hauled him up to a sitting position, to the edge of the sofa, holding him close again.

Loki took his face between his hands this time, forcing Tony to take pause, his eyes intensely searching Tony’s. "Do you mean that?"

"Yeah." Tony nodded and smiled, as if Loki had just asked him if he wanted another serving of dinner, all while shoving his jeans over his hips. "You with me?"

Slowly, as it all began to sink in, Loki's head started to move up and down, nodding yes. His heart swelled in his chest, his lashes fluttered as happy tears pricked his eyes, and he lowered his mouth to Tony's once more. "Yes, Anthony. I love you…with everything I have…"

Tony moaned into his mouth, wrapping his arms around him again, twisting to lower them both to the carpet. "I love you, Loki. Only you."

Loki reached down, aiding Tony in removing his boxers, their heavy breaths mingling, fingers tangling. "Show me, my darling."

Tony let out a pleasured groan at Loki's words, kissing him again, and pressing their bodies together. "Mmnnh…why'd we ever stop doing this?"

"Don't ask…" he breathed out, feeling as if he would burst from the inside out if Tony didn't make love to him soon. He sighed softly when he finally felt a finger prodding at his entrance and his hips jerked up at the touch.

"Babe…do you have any…mmm…any lube in here?"

Loki had to think. When they first moved in, when they still made love all over the house, whenever the opportunity presented itself, Loki stashed small bottles everywhere. But those days had long ended. "…No."

"Okay. No problem. Old-fashioned way it is."

"What does that — ohh!" Loki laughed, gasped, clenched, when Tony shoved his legs up in the air and put his tongue to work, using it and his finger to prepare Loki as quickly as he could. "Unh, Anthony…oh, it's been so long…"

Tony pulled away, shuffling into position on his knees between Loki's spread legs, and leaned over him, bringing his face around to continue kissing him. "I'm sorry…"

Loki went speechless for a moment, only shaking his head in protest. "No."

"Yes."

Loki pushed up onto his elbows. "Anthony, it was I who —" He swallowed back his words when Tony silenced him, crushing his mouth to his. He tried to break it but the pressure Tony was applying proved he couldn't move his lips much. He softened against him, moaning in broken sounds as Tony pushed himself inside him. "Oh… _ gods! _ " he cried out, throwing his head back, his fingers digging into Tony's sides.

"Baby…?"

"Go on, go…oh, please, darling, move.  _ Mmnh _ …"

Tony did, easing himself in and out of Loki slowly, letting them both get used to it again. "Fuck, Loki…you feel so good…I fucking love you."

"Mmnh-yes…" His hands slid up Tony's dampening back, cupping around his shoulders, using the grip to rock his pelvis up to meet Tony's. "I love you…I love you, I love you…." He murmured it over and over, like a chant, like a prayer. He had missed this so much. The feeling of belonging to Tony, that he was never completely whole until Tony filled him. Because it had been so long, he knew his release would come quick, especially with the pace at which Tony was thrusting into him. It built fast, the anticipation of it washing over him making heat coil tightly in his belly. "T-T-Tony…!"

"Now?"

"Uh-huh…" he nodded vigorously, afraid the quiet confirmation didn't get through to his husband.

Tony moved down again, stroking Loki hard and fast. "Come on, baby, come for me."

Loki's body bowed into itself, rocking against Tony's hand hard, then went ramrod straight, tensing, trembling as he hit his peak. Strangled, unintelligible sounds stuttered through his lips as he shot himself deep into Tony's mouth just as he wrapped it around Loki's cock. "Oh… _ fuck! _ "

Tony laughed against him, making his already sensitive skin tingle that much more. "Mmm, babe…"

Loki forced himself to sit up, grabbing Tony by the hips, and moved him over his lap. He reached up to cup his hand at the back of his head, bringing him down for a sloppy, wet kiss, as he started to stroke him roughly. Tony moaned, his fingers curling tightly under Loki's hair. He yanked Loki's head back, crying out, jerking against his husband as he came, spilling all over Loki's hand and legs. Unable to hold himself up, he pushed Loki back and fell half on top of him on the carpet. They both were breathing heavily, bodies covered in seed and sweat, and Loki lifted his hand, covered in Tony's come, to his mouth and, like a starving cat getting a bowl of milk, began to lick his fingers clean. "Mmm…I've missed your taste, my love."

Loki was still licking when a calloused hand roughly cupped his chin and his head was pulled toward Tony's and an aggressive tongue was seeking his, similarly aggressive lips sucking at his chin and mouth. Loki opened his eyes after Tony pulled away and just looked at him. Tony, on his stomach, shifted to drape himself more on top of Loki, delicately brushing strands of hair sticking to Loki's eyes and lips away. "I don't tell you you're beautiful enough."

Loki thought he might drown in all of this emotion.  _ But it would be a good way to die _ , he told himself. "I don't tell you how much you complete me enough."

Tony's lips curved just as he pressed them to Loki's again. "Where are the monsters?"

He laughed lightly. " _ Now _ you think of them."

Tony pressed a light kiss to Loki's shoulder, nuzzled it a little. "I was preoccupied with more important things when I came in."

The line between Loki's eyes formed. "Has something happened? Did you not say you would be home tomorrow?"

"Yeah." Loki thought his eyes went blank for a moment, but then he smiled. Perhaps he imagined it. "I missed you. Bad. I didn't see any reason to stay away any longer. And I…I wanted to make sure you still wanted me to come home," his voice had lowered and Loki could've kicked himself for putting that doubt in his husband's mind.

Loki raised his hand to Tony's face, brushing the backs of his fingers along his bearded cheek affectionately. "I will  _ always _ want you to come back to me, my love."

Tony’s lips curved in the goofy smile of a man in love. "You said it."

Loki, knowing exactly what he meant, smiled softly. Tony dropped his head to his shoulder again, pressed his face to the curve of his neck, and Loki inhaled the scent of his short hair. "You fit so perfectly against me…"

Tony hummed happily. "Can we stop…whatever the hell it was that was going on between us?" He slid his arm over Loki's torso, and his leg over both of his, and clung tightly to him. "I hate fighting with you. I mean, don't get me wrong, I love making up, but we weren't doing much of that for a time there."

Loki kissed the crown of his head, curling the fingers of one hand into his hair, and lightly ran his other hand along Tony's arm. "Too long…"

"Yeah." He lifted his head again, looking down at Loki, his eyes roaming over his face, as if looking at him for the first time and drinking in every detail, every line, every sharp curve of cheek, everything. "I love you. I'll never love anyone else the way I love you. No matter how much you piss me off," he said with a slow smile. "No matter how frustrated you make me. You are the only one for me."

Loki swallowed back the lump in his throat, the hand brushing over Tony's face going still against his cheek. It wasn't that he didn't love to hear those words from his husband; but in the back of his mind, where his insecurities lived, a nugget of doubt poked at him, wondering…where was it all suddenly coming from? "I…feel the same."  _ Pathetic _ , he told himself. But he didn't want to break this idyllic moment. Who knew what tomorrow would bring?

Tony leaned down to once more kiss him, slowly, deeply, and Loki felt heat curling in his belly again. "But, seriously…where are the kids?" Tony started to move his mouth down, along Loki's chin and throat, suckling lightly at his collarbone, heading, Loki knew, or perhaps just hoped, for his nipple.

"Um…they've been at…C-Clint and Natasha's since yesterday."

"Mmm…" Tony shifted, moving his body to rest atop Loki's again, continuing to lick and suck at his chest, leaving light red marks with both his mouth and beard. "Got an idea."

"Tell me," Loki sighed, stretching his legs a little wider so Tony pressed against his once again hardening cock. He placed his hands just above Tony's hips and moved him a little, in time with his own hips, a taste of the friction he imagined was coming.

"Why don't we…" Loki's eyes shot open when Tony moved off of him, laying on his side beside him. "Go pick up the kids and we all go out for a nice dinner together? Maybe one of those places with a play area for the kids."

Loki touched a hand to Tony's face again, his breath shallow, his lips parted. "That sounds like a wonderful idea." Tony smiled. "I promised Audrey mashed potatoes for dinner."

He shrugged. "We'll let the princess pick the restaurant."

Loki halfheartedly made a face. "You need to stop indulging her, remember?" Tony rolled his eyes and nodded, trailing a finger across his chest. Loki's eyes rolled closed, his skin sensitive from Tony's earlier attention. "Could I…make one small request?"

"Of course," he answered, running his hand lazily up and down Loki's torso. Loki rubbed a thumb over his full bottom lip and Tony nibbled on it briefly, before pressing a light kiss to it.

"Make love to me again before we leave?"

Tony's hand stilled for a beat before sliding down to curl around Loki's hip. "You read my dirty mind, babe." Loki's blood surged, plummeted to his groin, as Tony buried his face in his neck and rolled him onto his belly.

Eventually, they would have to talk seriously about their problems; Loki wouldn't let them repeat the mistake they made the first time around, using sex to cover up their deeper problems. He was determined to make sure they were happy from here on out, and it seemed Tony was on board with that, too. But for now, in this moment, and later that night after they brought the kids back home, he was going to enjoy his husband as his lover again.


	6. A Turkey of a Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thanksgiving brings friends and family to the Stark house. But the day takes a heartbreaking turn for Loki and Tony when another argument with Sebastian brings about a change neither of them expected.

The next few weeks in the Stark household passed by relatively peaceful, aside from a few bumps. Loki and Tony were getting along better than they had in awhile, and Loki noticed the concentrated effort his husband made to be home for dinner every night and to be at any events for the kids. They hadn't fought since Tony returned from New York and Tony had been  _ very _ attentive to Loki. They were having sex nearly every day again, mostly late into the night, once the kids were asleep, or early in the morning with Tony often dragging him into the shower with him. And if they were up to it, sometimes they indulged in both.

But as much as Loki was enjoying the attention, he still had a niggling of doubt in the back of his mind and every so often he silently questioned Tony's motives.

Despite his concerns, Loki felt grossly happy and madly in love with Tony all over again. The only really dark cloud in his otherwise sunny sky was Sebastian. The two were still struggling to find some common ground, and for reasons Loki couldn't fathom, just as he and Tony were growing close again, Sebastian seemed to be pulling away from Tony as well. His attitude had started to spill over and he was arguing more with both Loki and Tony now, and they were having to constantly punish him.

Loki could only hope Sebastian would behave better with their family and friends, over for the Thanksgiving holiday. Frigga, Thor and his family, and The Hogans had flown in from the East Coast for the weekend. The house was full of laughter, chatter, and loud kids; and the delicious scents of a full turkey dinner could be sniffed from any point in the house.

Clint and Thor moved in tandem around the kitchen, helping to get the fixings done as Loki finished up with the turkey. Every once in awhile, from a high stool by the counter over the stove, Natasha would bark an order or two while holding Xander, quieting down when Loki would shoot her a dark look. Frigga held court in the living room, talking with Sif and the voluptuous blonde that was her girlfriend, Sian, while Pepper and Happy sat nearby.

Tony wandered into the kitchen from the downstairs bathroom to grab a beer from the refrigerator, apologizing profusely when the three men cooking grumbled at him, and wandered over to Jane, standing guard by the screen door, keeping watch on the kids in the backyard. He popped off the bottle cap and took a long drink. "Does any of this strike you as odd?" he asked, motioning with the bottle.

"What? Three men cooking Thanksgiving dinner for eighteen people and nary a female in sight…?" Jane glanced toward the stove and grinned, "aside from Commander Natasha over there."

Tony chuckled. "We're such an evolved group aren't we?" Jane laughed with him, her eyes darting occasionally toward the backyard. "How are things at Banner-Odinson Labs?"

"They're going very well, thank you. Working on the cure for cancer of course," she said with a joking smile. "The old man's still creeping around the office, though."

Tony shook his head. "Doesn't know how to let go, does he?"

"You're one to talk," she scoffed.

He grunted as he drank from his bottle again. "Hey, I've been home a lot more lately. Just ask Loki."

"Yeah, right," Jane jeered, crossing her arms.

"Seriously!" Tony turned his head, searching for Loki. "Babe! When was the last time I actually worked a late night?"

Loki frowned at him from his position bent over the stove, basting the turkey. "I don't know; three weeks now, maybe. Why?"

Tony smiled smugly at Jane. "See? Hey! Slow down!" he yelled as Jazz and Audi sped between them into the house. Jane smiled softly at him and pulled Tony a little further away from the three men cooking.

"How are things in the Stark household?" Tony raised his eyebrows in question and Jane rolled her eyes. "You know Thor can't keep anything to himself, Tony. He told me that you and Loki had been arguing more than normal lately. I thought he was joking. Then we come out here and...you two seem to be getting along quite well."

Tony grinned, took another swig of beer. "Yeah…things were looking pretty grim there for a minute. But, we're...we're working through it. I'm not giving up on him so easy and he won't either."

"That's good to hear," she said with a sweet smile.

"Yeah...now, if Bash and Loki could go more than a couple of days without fighting, it would be even better."

Audi came running up and pulled on his t-shirt. "Daddy…"

Jane pouted sympathetically. "Are they still fighting a lot?"

Tony made a face and blindly reached for Audi’s hand. "Not every day, like it was for awhile there, but —"

"Daddy!" Audi tugged again.

"Wait, baby, we're talking," he said lightly, drawing a hand over her dark curls and pulling her to his side. "Still, they might go a day without, like, a full-fledged Loki's-forehead-vein-is-about-to-pop kind of fight, but we still get the voices-are-being-raised-and-things-are-being-said- or-muttered-sarcastically ones. And now he's starting with me so it's just…"

Jane laughed. "That sounds like you and Loki fighting. I have my own teenager at home, so I feel your pain, you just gotta —"

_ "Daddyyyy!" _

"Audrey. You just interrupted your Aunt Jane," he pointed at her with his beer and bent down so his face was closer to Audi's. "Apologize."

The little girl scowled and sighed, but looked at Jane and mumbled, "Sorry, Auntie Jane." Jane smiled down at her and nodded.

"Now, what can I help you with, princess?"

"Bash pushed me." Audi's face lit up a little, now that she had the attention back on her. Tony frowned and straightened.

"What? When?"

"Right now, in his room."

Tony angled his head, giving her a skeptical look. "What did I tell you about going in there? What were you doing in his room?"

"I didn't do anything!" she protested loudly, planting her fists on her little hips. "Me and Jazz were tryna get his baseball bat 'cause we were gonna play with Erik and Ro and Emma. And Matty was gonna be the ump. But Bash wouldn't let us in and when I tried to go he pushed me and I told him I was gonna tell." She crossed her arms, pouting angrily, and nodded once, as if she had mentally checked off everything on her to-do list.

Tony still frowned, but smiled, trying to understand the situation. "Has Bash been upstairs this whole time?"

"I dunno," she said with a shrug. "Daddy, he pushed me!" She shouted it, as if she hadn't been clear the first time, and her bottom lip popped out when Tony only laughed. He lifted her into his arms, settling her on his hip.

"Yes, I heard you, baby. But remember we talked about that, too; the whole you being a tattletale thing, right?"

Audi gasped, pressing her hands into his shoulders and leaning back to gape at him. "He  _ pushed _ me. You and  _ Pappa _ said they couldn't hit me, or any other girl."

"And for that he was wrong, so I will go talk to him. But, Monkey, you need to learn how to defend yourself without having to run to me or  _ Pappa _ . Or hitting." Audi's face scrunched into a deeper pout, unhappy with his answer.

"Darling…?" Loki came up behind Tony, laying one hand on Tony's hip, the other on Audi's back.

"Yeah, babe?" Tony turned his chin toward Loki's voice.

"Could you gather all the children? We're just about ready to start serving." He kissed Tony's cheek as Tony agreed.

"Hey, where's  _ my _ kiss?" Loki chuckled and kissed Audi’s cheek, too, before turning away. Tony set her on her feet again and patted her butt twice.

"Go wash your hands."

"Are you gonna yell at him?" She looked up at him with a very determined look, her hands back on her hips, and Tony swore it was Sif looking back at him.

"No, Audi, I'm going to  _ talk  _ to him. Now go." Audi scoffed and rolled her eyes, in a very Stark move, and walked away. Beside him, Jane chuckled.

"That one is going to be a hell-raiser." Tony made a pleading face and whimpered. "I'll get the kids back here," she said with a jut of her head toward the backyard.

"Thanks." Tony set his beer down on the nearest counter and started out of the kitchen. He could hear Clint calling everyone into the dining room, and caught sight of Loki helping Frigga up, as he headed to the staircase. He started up the steps, and could hear his two boys yelling at each other.

_ "Get out of my room, spaz!" _

_ "Stop calling me that! It's my room, too!" _

"Hey, hey, hey!" Tony sprinted up the last few steps and rushed to pull the two boys, shoving at each other just outside their bedroom, apart. "Keep your voices down. You want everyone downstairs to hear what whiny little kids you are?"

"He won't let me in my own room, Dad," Jazz complained.

"Okay, Jazz —"

"You're such a baby!"

Tony angled his body toward Sebastian. "Hey, come on; knock it off, Ba…" As he had turned to scold Sebastian, Tony spotted Ana, inside the room, sitting on his bed. His face fell and his eyes moved to Sebastian's half-shielded ones. He’d had the decency, at least, to blush a little and looked away from Tony’s hard gaze. Tony turned to Jazz, and when he spoke, his voice was tight and authoritative. "Jazz, go downstairs. They're about to serve dinner. And tell your father to come up here."

"But, Dad —"

"Go, now!" He aimed a finger at the stairs, and placing a hand on Sebastian's arm, moved him back into the room, stepping in with him. He pulled the door closed behind him, leaving it open just a crack for Loki. "What's she doing in here?" Now, Tony's voice was quieter, strained, and he was doing his best to control his temper.

Sebastian looked at Ana — whose big green eyes darted anxiously between father and son — then back to Tony. "Nothing."

"Yeah? You can do  _ nothing _ downstairs. Or on the porch. Or in the backyard." He could feel his eyes were wide and unwavering on Sebastian's face and his skin was growing hot with frustration. "You know the rules, Bash: you two are not supposed to be up here alone."

"I know," Sebastian muttered with a slight shrug.

"Do you?" Tony yelled the questioned so loud that Bash flinched.

"Anthony," Loki said quietly as he poked his head into the room. "What's going on up…?" He had stepped further into the room, his question dying off when he saw Ana. Sighing, he looked at Sebastian, who turned a brighter shade of red under Loki’s stare. "Anastasia, your mother is looking for you." He pulled open the door wider, inviting her to leave.

She hesitated briefly before rising and moving to the door, watching Sebastian the entire way. She paused and glanced up at Loki. "Are you gonna tell her about this?"

He cocked a brow, but gave her a sympathetic smile. "What do you think, dear?"

"Aw, crap," she muttered and left.

Loki closed the door completely and turned to face Tony and Sebastian, neither of whom had moved from their spots. And who both looked like they were spoiling for a fight. "Sebastian…"

"Dad already yelled at me, thanks."

"Oh, I haven't even started, kid." Tony perked up, calming again when Loki laid a hand on his arm. Slowly, he dropped it to his side again.

"What was she doing up here, Sebastian?"

He heaved a sigh impatiently. "We were just talking!"

"Don't raise your voice at me, young man," Loki replied in that cool, calm voice that always bothered Tony. Sebastian didn't seem to care for it much either, if the way he clenched his jaw was any indication. "I simply asked a question. I want an answer. Especially, since you know very well that she is not to be up here."

"Yeah, I know. But...I just wanted to show her my guitar. And we just wanted to talk alone. Not around all those stupid kids."

"Those stupid kids are your cousins and your brother and sister! Don't ever call them stupid!" Out of the corner of his eyes, Tony could see Loki wince a little at his raised voice.

"Anthony…"

"No, Loki. I'm sick of this!" Tony had moved so he could look at both Sebastian and Loki at the same time. "He keeps doing stuff like this, thinking we're not going to notice or that we'll just let it go." He aimed a stern finger at Sebastian. "You are not exempt from punishment, Sebastian!"

"Yeah, no kidding, since you guys are always punishing me!"

"Then stop doing things like this!" Tony took a step closer to Sebastian, and in response, he lifted his chin defiantly. It killed Tony that in a year or two, Sebastian would probably be taller than him. "Stop talking back to us. Stop pushing Jazz and Audi around. And stop acting like a little shit!"

"Anthony, that's enough." Tony fixed Loki with his angry glare and Loki tilted his head slightly before looking at Sebastian. "But he does have a point."

Like the petulant child he was being, Sebastian crossed his arms and glared, gradually turning away from his fathers. "Yeah, well, I guess everything's  _ my _ fault..." he muttered.

"You're grounded for the rest of the year." Tony saw Loki's jaw drop a little before he caught himself and folded his lips together, blinking and nodded at him, so Tony knew he was in agreement.

"What?" Sebastian whipped around again, his long, lanky arms falling to his side. "I didn't even do anything. That's bullshit!"

A low growl passed Tony's lips, and before he could stop himself, he lunged forward at Sebastian, an arm raised, stopped only by Loki moving in front of him and holding him back, his other arm drawn across Sebastian as he skittered back. "No, Anthony — stop!" Loki shouted, pushing against his chest then his arms.

"I'm sick of your shit, Bash!" Tony yelled around Loki's body, shaking off his fingers from his arms, but not getting anywhere. Sebastian's breath was coming fast, making his chest rise and fall quickly under his black long-sleeved shirt.

"Anthony, go downstairs," Loki said, his tone firm, and his voice rising just a bit. Tony's heated brown eyes flicked up to Loki’s face. "You need to cool off," Loki said under his breath. "Let me take it from here."

After a moment, after realizing what he’d been about to do, Tony nodded and started out of the room, with Loki trailing behind him. "I'm not kidding about him being grounded until next year, babe."

"I know, love. And I will uphold that." After another quiet, assuring word to Tony, Loki closed the door behind him, and faced Sebastian with his arms crossed and leaned against the door, watching him. Sebastian shifted uncomfortably under his gaze for a few long seconds.

"What?” he demanded. “Am I supposed to thank you for not letting him hit me?"

"No. Though, frankly, you should be thanking me. You deserved to be smacked for speaking to either of us like that. We are your fathers; we work very hard to treat you, and your siblings, with respect. We expect the same in return." Sebastian only lowered his gaze to his feet. "So, instead of your thanks, just for fun, why don't you explain to me why you brought Anastasia up here, knowing that it was against the rules."

Sebastian rolled his eyes. "Maybe I'm sick of all your stupid rules."

Loki frowned, for many reasons, he found. "You seem very fond of the word 'stupid' lately, Sebastian," he observed.

"So?" he mumbled.

"So…" Loki pushed up from the door, but didn't move too far away from it yet. "Are your teachers failing to enhance your vocabulary or is there something more psychological going on?" Sebastian's response was to scowl at him. Loki smirked. "Don't act as if you did not understand what I've just said. You're smarter than that." He took a few steps closer, keeping his gaze focused on Sebastian's face. "Why did you bring her up here?"

Sebastian breathed out heavily again, briefly squeezing his eyes shut. "What's the point of me saying anything if you're not even gonna believe me anyway? I already told you."

Loki chuckled softly. "Sebastian, please do not take me for a fool. I was your age myself once, believe it or not. And I pulled a lot more tricks behind my parents' back than you've tried to pull over ours. Why was she up here? Sitting on your bed, no less," he murmured softly, looking at the bed. Sebastian only shook his head and half turned away, saying nothing. Loki tilted his head again. "What is it?"

Still, Sebastian gave no response.

Loki sighed softly, wanting badly to grab his son, and hold him and rock him, and let him play his little fingers in the ends of his hair like he used to when they used to talk together. He imagined being the son of a well-known man and  _ another  _ man added even more complications to being a twelve year-old boy. And he tried to keep that in mind. "Son, I know this is probably a very confusing time for you right now. And…maybe you've started to see Anastasia in a different light — which is perfectly normal for a boy your age."

He snorted, still not looking at Loki. Loki fought for patience.

"Just because you have two fathers does not mean we do not know what you are going through. He and I have a lot of experience we can share with you. More than you may think."

Sebastian glanced over his shoulder. "Yeah…I've heard about dad's 'experiences,' already," he said using finger quotes. "I haven't heard anything about yours."

Loki smirked at him. "You've only heard of me with your father for two reasons, Sebastian. One, your grandfather was a well-known man, which made your father well-known and his…extracurricular activities were something of interest to the general public; even more so when he took over the company. I know all about them, so there's nothing for him to hide or be ashamed of. The second is because after I met him, in college, no one else mattered. There was no reason to speak of anyone else, though there were others. I love him very much."

Sebastian made a weird noise and when he looked at Loki very quickly, Loki could see his face had reddened. "I know. I can  _ hear  _ how much you love each other every night."

Loki laughed softly, but cut himself off. "That aside, you know you can talk about whatever you need to with me."

"I don't want to talk about anything with  _ you! _ " Sebastian nearly growled as he whipped around to face Loki again. Loki’s face snapped into a frown and he straightened, his eyes narrowing slightly.

"Sebastian, have I done something to you?"

Sebastian's lips formed a tight pout, barely opening as he softly asked, "What?"

"Your behavior these past few months has been, to say the least, horrendous. You've been very disrespectful toward me and, just now, you were very rude to your father."

"Who cares? He's not my real dad anyway!" Sebastian started forward toward the door and stumbled back when Loki stopped him, his hand curling tightly around Sebastian’s arm and jerking him back in front of him. Loki's usually bright eyes went dark, his lips thinned to a white line, and his voice was tightly coiled when he spoke.

"Those words are never to pass your lips again, Sebastian Daniel Stark. Do you understand me?" He asked a question, but he did not wait for an answer. "That man has been very good to you. Perhaps you don't see that right now, through your imagined haze of slight, but he has been a wonderful father to you when he didn't need to be. It would do you well to be grateful for that."

Sebastian's body was tense under Loki's hand and the expression on his face was one of fright, but his eyes remained dark with anger. "Are  _ you _ gonna hit me now?" His tone was challenging, but Loki could still hear the fear in it.

Letting out a slow breath, and releasing his Sebastian's thin arm, Loki took a step back. "I have never laid a hand on you in anger in your entire life, darling. Don't tempt me now."

Sebastian defiantly stared at Loki, his bottom lip wobbling, his eyes starting to glisten. "I don't wanna live here anymore."

Caught by surprise by the quiet, but resolved statement, Loki blinked and his lips parted to speak, but before he could, a knock at the door interrupted him.

"Hello?" Sif stepped in, a small smile on her face. "Tony sent me up. He said there was — oh!" When he saw his mother, Sebastian zoomed past Loki into her arms, squeezing her tightly.

"Mama…"

Stupefied, Loki wandered to the nearest solid thing he could find and lowered to what turned out to be Sebastian's bed. Sif's arms immediately wrapped around her son, her hand cupped at the back of his head.

"What? What's happened? Loki?" He lifted his eyes to hers at his name, inhaled, but couldn't find any words to speak.

Sebastian pulled back to look up at her. "Mama, can I come live with you?"

Sif frowned and looked to Loki again, and watched him slowly close his eyes and breathe out slowly. Something was very wrong. "Well…why, baby? What's the matter?"

"Nothing," he muttered. "I just don't wanna live here anymore."

Sif sighed, brushing her hands over Sebastian's damp face and cheeks, pushing his hair from his face, as she always did. She didn't understand why he wanted to hide his beautiful face. "But, Bash…your brother and sister are here and —"

"I don't care!"

"Sebastian." The soft scolding for raising his voice made him whimper.

"Please…?" he asked softly, his voice cracking.

"Take him."

Sif looked at Loki, shocked, as Sebastian buried his face in her shirt. "Loki?"

Loki stood, shaking his head, raising a hand to stave off any argument. "I will not keep him here if it is not where he wants to be. At this point, I know not what to do with him anymore anyway. Just…" He paused, his throat constricting painfully. "Take him," he croaked out.

Too shocked at the speed at which all of this was happening Sif could only watch Loki leave. Once they were alone, she guided Sebastian to his bed. "Bash, what happened?" He sniffled, unwilling to let her go, but doing so when it became too uncomfortable to stay wrapped around her.

"I don't wanna be here."

Sif pressed her lips together disapprovingly, clamping down on her frustration with the situation. "Yes, you've said that. I want to know why."

"Because…all they do is ground me and yell at me. I hate it here."

"Are you innocent in all this?" She waited for him to look at her. "I seem to remember you saying some very inappropriate things to both of your fathers and you getting caught skipping school."

"But, Mama, I can't do anything without them getting mad at me!"

"And you don't think you've done  _ anything _ wrong?" she asked on a soft laugh to soften the blow. Sebastian clucked his tongue and pouted. "Darling, you may come with me, but only for a month or two." He had smiled widely then frowned again.

"Why?" He drew out the word on a high-pitched whine, his eyes filling with tears again.

"Because I have told you before, Sebastian: you're home is  _ here _ , with your fathers and your siblings. I love when you're with me, I do, but I cannot always be there and I don't want you to be alone all the time."

Sebastian tugged on her hands, gripping them tightly. "I don't mind, Mama! I'll be okay. I can help you clean the house and keep you company."

She squeezed his hands back then lifted one of hers to his cheek, leaving it there until he calmed down again. "You say that now. But you will miss them all eventually." Sebastian slumped a little, his eyes still threatening to spill over. "And it's not just me I have to think about. Sian lives there, too. Now, come on. We'll discuss it later and pack you a small bag after dinner."

Wiping at his face, clutching his mother's hand, Sebastian stood and followed her out of the room.

* * *

Loki smiled and laughed all through dinner, carrying on conversations with his mother and Thor and his friends as if everything was wonderful and nothing was wrong. But inside; inside his heart was breaking into a million little pieces. His son was barely a teenager and wanted nothing to do with him. He didn't even want to be in the same house. Loki wanted to yell and scream and take out all of this anger inside him on something, anything. He hadn't yet told Tony. And he was dreading the end of this day.

Just his luck, the turkey kicked in fairly quick, and everyone wanted to call it an early night. The first to depart were Clint and Natasha. He had pulled his best friend aside while everyone gobbled up pumpkin pie and filled her in on Ana's whereabouts earlier. She wasn't happy about it but she tried to get Loki to see the humorous side of it all. Perhaps if things hadn't ended with his child wanting to move out, he could have. Shortly after the Bartons left, Thor and Jane gathered up the kids and Frigga and headed back to the hotel Tony had offered to put everyone up in. Pepper, Happy, and Emma followed.

By this time, Audrey had knocked out in Loki's lap and Jazz was sitting with Sif and Sian, talking about his latest science project, still hyped up from running around with his cousins all day. Nothing ever seemed to faze that kid. At Sian's signal that she was ready to leave, Sif headed upstairs to help Sebastian pack some things and Tony followed, having learned of the new development, and not happy about it. He had tried, unsuccessfully, to convince Sebastian to stay.

Loki couldn't bring himself to watch Sebastian walk out, and like a coward, he couldn't deal with saying goodbye. So, after seeing Sian off with a hug and a kiss to the cheek, Loki lifted Audrey carefully into his arms and carried her up to her bedroom, taking his time to change her into her pajamas and methodically put away the toys that had been taken out and played with that day. Tony had poked his head in the room, to let Loki know that Sif and Sebastian were leaving. Loki simply told him to tell them goodnight for him. Thankfully, Tony didn't push. He followed them down to see them out, and sent Jazz up for bed. Loki was waiting for him in the boys' room, willing himself not to look at Sebastian's empty side of the bedroom and to keep his emotions clamped down firmly.

Loki put on a smile for Jazz, chuckling softly as he listened to the boy rattle on about his day, going from subject to subject. It was as dizzying as listening to Tony. The voices from downstairs faded away as they walked outside and Loki focused on ushering Jazz into bed and tucking his blankets around him.

"Is Bash being sent away because of me?" he suddenly asked once he was settled. Loki went still and frowned softly down at him.

"Why would you think that?"

He shrugged his little shoulders, turning onto his side. "He got in trouble 'cause of me."

Loki sighed softly and laid his hand on the other side of Jazz's body on the bed, leaning slightly over him. "He did not get in trouble because of you, darling. He got in trouble because of himself. And…he  _ chose _ to leave; we're not sending him away."

Jazz' fingers began to Toy with the silver band around Loki's finger. "Is he gonna come back?" His voice had lowered even more.

Loki hesitated. He honestly didn't know the answer. "Eventually, I'm sure."

"I hope so…"

He smiled softly at Jazz, his little boy, combing his fingers through his thick, dark hair, spiked every which way. "You two argue so often. Are you going to miss him?"

Jazz pouted a little and nodded. "He's my brother," he mumbled, tucking his chin into his shoulder. Loki's heart ached. "And I don't like being in here all by myself."

Sympathetic to that feeling, Loki took Jazz's hand in his, pressing his lips to the backs of his fingers. "You've nothing to fear in here, Jameson. Your dad and I are not far away. You come to us if you need anything, all right?"

"Okay." He smiled then, and held out his arms. "Hug me!" Loki laughed and met the boy halfway, squeezing him tightly, and suddenly fighting the emotion that sprung up.

"Knock, knock," Tony greeted, rapping his knuckles on the door, despite his announcement. Loki quickly blinked away his tears and sat up.

"Can I get a bedtime story?"

Tony smiled down at his son, brushing his fingers along the side of Loki's neck to cup his hand around the nape, massaging the spot lightly. "Sure, buddy."

Loki took Tony's hand, only to remove it from his neck, and got to his feet. "I'm tired. Could you take it tonight?"

"Yeah, sure, babe." He squeezed Loki's hand, causing him to stop. "Are you okay?"

Loki nodded once, barely smiling. "I'm fine. I'll see you in a bit. Good night, darling."

"'Night,  _ Pappa _ ." Loki gave his husband's bearded chin a light pinch and left the room.

When Tony entered the bedroom about ten minutes later, after telling Jazz about the class project in college that blew up his and Thor's oven, Loki was sitting on his side of the bed, his back to the door. And not moving.

"Babe?" He paused, waited for a response. He heard a quiet sniffle and started forward, lowering beside Loki when he reached him. "Hey." Loki tried a smile, but his face was already splotchy and damp. Tony brushed his hand over Loki's face, pushing back his black hair, tucking it behind his ear. "Why'd you let him go, babe?" he asked quietly.

Loki let out a combination of a laugh and a scoff. "What else was I to do, Anthony? We're not getting along very well; perhaps this will help."

"You don't believe that. I can see it written all over your face."

He nodded in agreement, his chin quivering. "I…I didn't want to force him to stay here just because  _ I _ want him close."

Tony didn't try to stop the tears; they were coming too fast for that. But he held Loki's hand in his, against his chest. "You're not the only one, babe."

Loki didn't respond, only fought back more tears. "I have failed him as a father."

"No. Hey." Tony grabbed his face roughly, forcing him to look at him. "You do not get to say that," he said forcefully. "This is not on you, okay? This is on him. There's something going on with him and I'm gonna find out what it is."

Loki's breath hitched. "Don't —"

"No, no, not now," he said much more calmly, wiping anyway at the endless line of tears streaming from Loki's eyes. "I'll give him some time and then I'll talk to him." Loki sniffled, breathing out heavily through swollen, reddened lips, lowering his head, as Tony's hand rubbed soothingly over his back. "He's not gonna stay there forever, babe. Sif said a month, at the most two, and then he comes right back here." Loki nodded. "Look at me."

He flicked his eyes up, red-rimmed and still swimming, and Tony cupped his hand beneath his chin.

"You are not allowed to feel bad about yourself as a father. There are two other kids in this house who need you and who love you… _ unconditionally _ ." He said it so emphatically that Loki smiled softly; it was through tears but it was there. He moved his hand over Loki's hair again and brought the hand still wrapped in his to his mouth. "Hell, baby. You rival some of the best moms out there. And you're a damn sure better father than I am."

"No." It was the first clear word he had spoken and it made Tony smile. "I'm not."

Tony dropped his hand down to Loki's thigh, squeezed it reassuringly. "You keep this house running, Loki. You're the backbone of it. And you look so gorgeous while you do it." Loki let out a water laugh, playfully slapping at Tony's hands before clutching onto them and bursting into tears again. "Hey, hey…Loki…" Tony gathered him close, feeling his tears seep into his t-shirt. After a moment, he maneuvered both of them so he could continue to hold Loki at they stretched out on the bed. Loki simply curled tighter against him, his sobs muffled in Tony's shoulder. Tony said nothing — knew there was nothing he  _ could _ say — and just let Loki cry.

Eventually, he grew quiet, calmed by Tony's fingers stroking lightly through his hair. "Would you hate me if I asked for a very small celebration for our anniversary in few weeks?"

Tony frowned, a small part of him angry at Sebastian for putting Loki through this. "No, I could never hate you," he answered almost absently. "We'll just do a small dinner, the four of us."

Loki sniffled, his breath hitching even more now, and slightly raised his head "Y-you think he would not come?"

He looked at Loki and smiled, kissed his forehead and pushed his head back down to his shoulder. "We'll ask. But…I wouldn't count on it." Loki turned his face into Tony's shoulder again, fighting more tears. Tony's arms tightened around him more, and figuring this was how they were going to sleep tonight, he kicked off his shoes, disturbing Loki as little as possible, and made himself comfortable.


	7. Letters, Love, and Little White Lies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony receives a letter demanding money to keep silent about his drunken night in New York. Which he promptly ignores. After the stress of the holidays and the last few months, Tony whisks Loki away for a romantic New Year’s trip, just the two of them, revisiting a romantic spot for them both.

It was a week or two after Thanksgiving when Tony received the first letter. The first thing that struck him as odd was that the plain white envelope had been tucked in with his other mail and dropped in a bundle on his desk at work. No return address. No postmark. No name. There was a short typed message, addressed directly to him, lamenting the fact that Tony had left the hotel room without saying goodbye that morning in New York. His blood ran cold. Of course that woman would have known who he was. He was foolish to have hoped she had disappeared, with his memory of the night. The second thing that struck him as odd: the casually stated demand for ten thousand dollars to keep quiet about that night. The secretive woman even included the number to the bank account she wanted the money put in and signed it simply 'M.'

Ignoring it, Tony crumpled the note and tossed it away.

Ten large was chump change for a Stark, but he would be damned before he would pay this mystery woman a cent. Aside from his pride, there was no way he could take that much money from the bank without Loki noticing — and asking questions. Loki took care of the bills at home. He had access to the checkbook. He would notice. And he would ask questions. And Tony would be dead. He suddenly recalled Loki threatening to have a go at his junk with a butter knife if he ever caught him cheating, back when they had first gotten together.  _ Ow _ .

Of course, he could always take the honorable route and simply tell Loki what happened. But he still had no idea what had occurred between him and the mystery woman. He had had flashes here and there since that night, but really all he could recall when he thought back to that night was a bar, a blurry woman, a lot of liquor, and a hotel room that did not belong to him. Though, honestly, in the deepest part of his heart, where his love for Loki thrived, Tony didn't think he had done anything with that woman. He remembered just wanting and needing Loki more than the air he breathed in that night. But, clearly, this woman knew him and his life, and was using his love for Loki to hold the  _ possibility  _ over his head to try to get money out of him.

It was probably unwise for him to think if he ignored it, it would go away, but, at the moment, he had other things on his mind. It wasn't something he felt like dealing with. Not when his husband was feeling so down.

The house was still nosy as hell with Jazz and Audi running rampant, but Sebastian's absence was felt by all of them; most especially Loki. Tony had caught him a few times already, blankly staring at Sebastian’s empty bed from the doorway, or standing at his closet, running his fingers over his clothes.

Tony had to avidly work not to resent his eldest son. It was one thing to misbehave every now and then, and be a little annoyed with a parent when things didn’t go your way. God knew there hadn't been a week that went by that he and Howard hadn't had a good row, or seven, when Tony was around Sebastian's age — and it only got worse as he had aged. Tony's issue with it all was that Sebastian had no plausible reason to be putting Loki through this — or any of them. He was loved, immeasurably, by three parents. Three more than Tony had ever had. He still believed there was something much deeper going on with him.

Christmas was just around the corner and Tony had mixed feelings about it. He was looking forward to seeing Sebastian — the kid hadn't even called to talk to them since he had left, but Sif sent them regular updates, and, Loki found out from Natasha, Sebastian had been talking sporadically to Jazz and Audi through Ana. But, mostly, Tony was concerned about what the atmosphere would be like between Sebastian and Loki. He knew Loki was more eager about seeing Sebastian than he would ever admit or show, but Tony didn't need him to. He knew him well enough.

It was why Loki couldn't get to sleep one night, exhausted as he was from spending the evening with the Bartons to exchange gifts, and after he finally got Jazz and Audi to bed, both of them much too hyper for their own good. They were going to see Sebastian the next day, when the whole family, Sif and Sian included, would fly back east to celebrate Christmas with Frigga, Thor and his family. If Tony just had to give him a slow building, heart-crashing, explosive orgasm to help him get to sleep, then so be it. It was his husbandly duty, after all.

* * *

The days leading up to Christmas were hectic. Frigga, busy with her antique store and giddy with excitement to have her entire family with her, left the shopping for Christmas dinner to the last minute. So Loki and Tony stepped in and got the shopping done. Christmas morning, with twelve people to open gifts around the Christmas tree, went on for quite some time. Thor, Jane and the kids eventually returned to their home to dress for the day, and returned to a house that smelled of a cooking roast and sugary desserts.

It was too cold for the kids to play outside, so Katie busied herself putting braids in Audi's wildly wavy hair while Audi banged the head of her new Barbie doll against the carpet — a sign she wasn't a big fan of it; Erik and Jazz were running through every room, playing an indoor game of tag, and driving everyone crazy; and Matty and Sebastian sat side-by-side on the sofa, in front of the TV, ignoring  _ It's A Wonderful Life _ . Matty was playing video games and Sebastian was on his phone — likely texting Ana on the other side of the country. Every once in awhile, they would actually converse.

Tony wandered from room to room, chatting with everyone from Thor to Jane then Frigga, even stopping in the living room to take Audi's Barbie away. He carried it to Loki, sitting at the dining table with Thor and Jane, shouting hello to Pepper on the phone at Loki's ear, calling from London where the employee brouhaha had finally been settled, and where Happy and Emma had flown to spend the holiday with Pepper. Tony pressed a short kiss to Loki's hair and spotted Sif, coming down the steps. He picked up two cups of Frigga's eggnog and made his way to her, noticing the way her mouth was turned down, and smiled sympathetically when he reached her.

"I take it you're missing Sian."

She pouted a little. "Mm. Yes. She had planned to be here, but a last minute shoot sent her up to New York somewhere. If she finishes before Friday, she may fly out here before going home."

Tony playfully patted her head then brought the eggnog to his lips. Before drinking he asked casually, "So how goes it in NoHo?"

Sif chuckled behind her own glass, shaking her head. "Do you really want to know or are you actually asking how it's going with Bash?"

He mock-frowned at her. "Am I that transparent?"

She laughed and shrugged. "It goes." She twisted her mouth a little, slightly frowning over at him. "How did you two do it?"

Tony chuckled and pointed at Loki with the cup. "Loki takes the credit for that. Our house is a well-oiled machine thanks to my gorgeous man."

"That's sweet, but it's not quite what I meant." She set her empty cup down on a nearby bookshelf, crossed her arms and stepped closer, leaning in conspiratorially. "How did you two… _ do it _ ?"

Tony smiled slowly and laughed teasingly. "Is there a certain twelve year-old boy putting a cramp in your sex life? Been there, done that."

"Yes! I don't know how you two did it with three kids, or how you're managing it with two, but, oh my god. When do you find enough time?"

Tony shrugged a shoulder, discreetly glanced around to make sure none of the kids were in near enough proximity to overhear their conversation. "I admit; it was easier when they were all younger and couldn't walk in so fast. Of course, locks worked to fix that. But back then they believed that we were wrestling more readily, too. Can't really hide what we're doing when it comes to a kid who actually  _ knows _ what sex is."

Sif scoffed and Tony had to hold back a snicker. "Tell me about it. It really kills the mood when you're going to town on your girlfriend and your kid yells out,  _ 'Mama, I'm hungry! _ '"

He laughed, absolutely tickled. "Oh, man! Thanks for that image, honey. That is really gonna…I'm gonna go to town on Loki tonight because of that." He cried out and laughed again when Sif socked him in the arm. He looked away and watched, his heart melting a little, as Audrey ran up to Loki and excitedly showed him a new coloring book she had just received from Frigga. The smile on her face matched Loki's. Tony turned back to Sif and caught sight of Sebastian, too, secluding himself, and frowned. "Has he been giving you any trouble?"

Sif sighed, spotting Sebastian at the same time as Tony, alone and still on his phone. "Some. Not nearly what he was giving you and Loki, but my boy is no angel."

"Anything we should know about?"

She pursed her lips, contemplating. "…Yes. But I don't know if this is the time for me to tell you about it."

"Hell no, woman, you brought it up. I gotta know now."

Sif smiled ruefully, then sighed remembering the incident. "Don't tell Loki yet, but…he skipped school again."

"What?" Tony started rushing forward to Sebastian, but Sif stopped him, and pulled him into the doorway of Frigga's office. "Sif —"

"Don't, Tony," she whispered. "I told him I wouldn't tell you until after Christmas."

Tony huffed out a put-upon breath. "Sif, you can't make deals like that with him," he whispered back sharply.

She held up her hands toward him, surrendering. "I know. But things are still very tense between him and Loki. And I'd rather they spent Christmas avoiding each other then screaming at each other."

He frowned, his good mood gone. "What happened?"

"Oh, you're going to hate this." He angled his head, effectively telling her to hurry up and tell him. "All right, but I warned you. I left work early. I wasn't feeling well and when I came home…he was there." Tony's chin lowered, waiting for her to lower the boom. She sighed. "He wasn't alone, Tony."

"Some kid ditched with him? It wasn't Ana was it?" he asked, doing his best to keep his voice as low as possible.

"No…" she said slowly.

"What?" He sensed her hesitation.

Sif was trying, and failing, to not laugh. "Well, it  _ was _ a girl."

For a moment, Tony stared, torn between being upset that Sebastian skipped school again and proud that he snagged a girl. But… "Wait. It  _ wasn't _ Ana? I thought they were…you know, doing that whole dramatic junior high torrid affair thing."

She laughed, but shook her head. "Ana's not at the same school anymore; I do think he's sweet on her, but he's around different girls now; older, more  _ developed _ girls. And that's where the part you're not going to like comes in. Because, Tony…they weren't playing video games or doing homework."

"Jesus. What were they doing?"

"My best guess…? He was rounding first and about to dive head-first into second." Tony chuckled and groaned, ran a hand over his face. Sif laid a sympathetic hand on his shoulder. "There's more." Sif waited for Tony to look at her and dropped her hand back to her side. "She had one of those button-up plaid shirts on. And, uh…it was pretty clear that it hadn't been  _ closed _ the entire time they had been there."

Well, this was a new feeling. Normally, when Tony heard about another guy scoring, he cheered, he high-fived, there was a celebration. But hearing it about your own kid…he wanted to run over to Sebastian right now, bundle him up in his arms and order him to stay a little boy forever. "Oh. My. God. Are you kidding me?" Sif just shrugged, looking as miserable as he felt. "You talked to him, right?"

"Of course, I did. But he really needs the male perspective. I think both you and Loki should sit down and talk to him."

Tony crossed one arm over his chest, resting the fist of the other against him mouth. "Loki's gonna shit bricks when he hears about this."

"I know. I nearly did. I had a fit. I was screaming at them both until the girl buttoned up and ran out. It was awful."

"Sif, I need a day with him," Tony said turning on her so quickly, she jolted.

"What-what do you mean?"

"I need to spend a day with him, just him and me. I'll take him to that guitar thing in Redondo Beach or something. I just, there's something going on with this kid and I want to get to the bottom of it."

Her look of concern didn’t fade as she studied Tony’s face. "Why…what do you think it is?"

"I don't know. I mean, I know at this age kids go through a change and they don't want to be around their parents as much. They want to be independent. And I know we're all for that for him, but…you have to admit, his need's a little different. There has to be something behind this skipping school shit. I am not a fan of that."

Sif seemed to think that over for a moment, finally nodding. "All right. When are you going to do this?"

"Well, it'll have to wait until mid-January. Loki wanted to do New Year's Eve alone, just the two of us, so I booked us a trip a couple of weeks ago."

She smiled softly. "Is he doing any better with this?"

Tony made a so-so hand gesture. "He stopped crying about it after a week, thank god. That was tearing me apart."

"If it's just the two of you, where are the little ones going to?"

"We gave them a choice: Clint and Natasha's or here. They wanted to be with Frigga, so they're just gonna stay the rest of the week."

Sif smiled wider. "And you two lovebirds…?"

Tony shook his head firmly. "Mm-mm, nope. It's a surprise for him. Hey, speaking of surprises. I want to throw him a surprise fortieth."

She gasped comically. "Oh, Tony, he will kill you."

He nodded and laughed. "Normally, yeah, he would. But…" He stretched his neck out to look at Loki, who was discreetly watching Sebastian while Jane and Thor talked animatedly together and beside him, Audrey colored in her book. "Sif, he's had a really shitty year. We were fighting for most of it. The kids have been bigger monsters than ever. This hasn't been the best Christmas. I just want to give him a good start to the year."

She smiled fondly, reaching up to pat his cheek. "You are a very good husband to him, Tony."

"Yeah, I know," he said with a grin. "He's so lucky." Sif burst into loud laughter as Jazz ran up to them.

"Dad!"

"What!" he mimicked Jazz's urgent tone and stepped out back into the hall where the little boy was waiting for him. Erik stood nearby, giggling quietly to himself. This wasn't going to end well. Jazz was smiling up at him, practically jumping up and down with excitement.

"I learned a new song!"

"Awesome. Tell me."

"Joy to the world, Santa's dead! We barbecued his head! Don't worry about the body! We flushed it down the potty! And 'round and 'round it went! And 'round and 'round it went! And 'ro-ound and 'round and 'round it went!" He giggled as he finished, Erik practically gasping for breath behind him.

Tony stared back at forth between the two then placed a hand on Jazz's head to keep him in place. "You're sick, my boy. You need to see a doctor." Jazz laughed with his whole body, throwing his head back and flapping his arms.

" _ Pappa _ , I told you he wouldn't laugh!" He ran back to Loki, throwing himself in his waiting arms. Loki caught him and kissed the top of his head, before Jazz ran off again. Loki caught Tony's eye and smiled a little, before Audrey pulled away his attention again.

"I'll cook for the party."

Tony looked down at Sif and smiled. "Thanks."

"Dinner's ready!" Frigga called out.

"I had an idea about the theme. But you and I gotta sit down and have a talk."

Sif turned her face up to his, her brows furrowed, but her lips curved. "You sound so serious; what do you need to talk about?"

Tony slid an arm around her shoulders as they walked toward the dining area. "How's your health doing these days?" Sif stopped, grinned suspiciously up at him.

"Tony,” she drew out his name, crossed her arms. “Why am I getting the feeling that I'm about to go on a nine-month vacation?"

Tony nearly giggled and kissed her temple. "Because you, my beauty, are an intelligent woman; which is something I've always admired about you."

"Ass-kisser," she muttered.

"May I have my husband back now?" Loki asked, slinking his arms around Tony's waist from behind him. Tony smiled and reached back to kiss the corner of Loki's mouth.

"Hi, kitten."

"Oh, gods, not that again," Sif said with a big eye roll. "He's all yours," she said with a flick of her hand, waving them off.

"Hey, lover." Tony spun in Loki's arms and grabbed him closer, pressing his face to the side of his neck, kissing and nibbling.

"Anthony."

"What? Sorry. I don't know what came over me."

Loki nudged him around the side of the wall where they were hidden from the rest of the family, noisily trying to find their seats around the large oak table, and nuzzled his husband's cheek. "How soon can we leave for our trip?" he asked softly.

Tony was biting his lip at Loki's affections; then went still, frowning a little at the question. But he understood why Loki was asking. Sebastian had avoided them both the entire time they had been in Virginia. "Whenever you want, babe. The StarkJet is always at your disposal."

Loki pulled back and pressed his lips to Tony's lightly. "Let's leave tomorrow? I just want to be away from all of…this. And just be with you." Tony wrapped his arms around Loki, hugging him close, and slipped his hands into the back pockets of Loki's slacks.

"Well, I hope you packed light, babe. Because I'm gonna want you naked for most of it." Loki chuckled lowly and buried his face in Tony's neck.

"What are you guys doing?" Audi demanded to know, planting her hands on her hips, as she stomped around the corner.

The pair didn't really break apart, but they both turned to look down at her. "I'm trying to love up on your  _ Pappa _ , why are you bugging me?" Tony earned a light punch to the gut for that.

"We're waiting for you for dinner, Daddy," she said as if it was the biggest inconvenience for her to have to tell him this information. "I'm hungry!"

"Oh! Well, lead the way, milady," he said, mockingly bowing to her. She turned away, her little nose up in the air. Tony turned back to Loki and kissed him quickly then took his hand and led him into the dining room.

* * *

The next morning, Loki and Tony kissed the kids goodbye — gave Sebastian an awkward small wave — and boarded the StarkJet early in the morning. On the flight, Loki asked repeatedly where they were headed, but Tony wouldn't give him a straight answer. He even made sure the flight crew kept it to themselves and had the windows blacked out so Loki couldn't sneak a peek if Tony happened to doze off. But it turned out to be Loki who slept, with his head in Tony's lap, while he finished up some work to end the year. By the time the plane landed, they had curled up together.

And when Loki finally stepped off the plane to see where they were, he was so touched, he got a little choked up. He blamed these over-emotional feelings on the past month away from Sebastian and nothing between them seemingly getting better. Thankfully, Tony had brought him to a place that held wonderful memories for them, and the place where they were really able to start their lives together as a family: Monte Carlo. He had even managed to book the room they had stayed in on their honeymoon.

They were in the elevator, on the way up to their room, and, if it weren't for the damn bellboy in the elevator with them, Loki would have been all over Tony, pushing him up against the wall, and down on his knees in the blink of an eye. He made do, though, standing close, nibbling on Tony's ear, his hot breath brushing across the shell, which caused goosebumps to form along his tanned skin, and caressed one of Tony's ass cheeks teasingly.

"Babe…" Tony whispered, nudging him weakly in a weak attempt to get him to stop. Loki hummed in his ear, continued his attention, and scraped his teeth along the curve of Tony's neck and upper shoulder. " _ Mmnh _ — ahem!" Tony giggled quietly at his almost-moan. "Stop it."

"Stop what, love? I just want to show you my appreciation." Biting his own lip, Loki slid his finger along the seam of Tony's pants, between his ass cheeks, down to press against his perineum, and glided it back up. Tony hissed softly and reached behind him for Loki's hand but he pulled it away before he could.

"Garnier Diamond Suite," the bellboy announced as the doors slid open and he started to maneuver the luggage trolley out of the elevator.

Tony twisted around to find Loki's hand and held it tightly in his and fixed him with a stern look. "Behave yourself."

"Aren't I usually the one saying that to  _ you _ ?" Tony continued to grin and pulled him out of the elaborately decorated box, following the bellboy into the room.

Once inside, Loki took his hand from Tony's grasp, plucked up his travel bag from the luggage trolley, and headed straight for the bedroom, leaving Tony to deal with the bellboy. Everything looked almost exactly the same. A change here and there in the color scheme and the style of furniture, but the layout was still quite similar to the one from eight years before.

Loki listened to the muted voices of Tony and the bellboy as he took his time removing his boots, pants and sweater, until he stood in nothing but a pair of body hugging hunter green trunks with a gold waistband. He wandered the room, waiting until he heard the door close behind the bellboy then called for Tony to come into the bedroom.

"What are you up to, you sneaky, little…?" Tony stopped short when he saw Loki, his eyes raking up and down his long, lean body. "…Devil," he finished, his voice a wisp of a rasp. "What are you…?"

"I told you I wanted to show you my appreciation," Loki murmured, pulling Tony along with him to the bed. He willingly followed. His chocolate brown eyes darkening with desire, he reached up to kiss Loki, but Loki leaned away just before their lips touched and Tony whined softly. Loki smirked and ducked his head instead to place a small kiss against Tony's neck, and continued to nibble, as he turned them both, until Tony's back was facing the bed. Tony's hand slipped into Loki's hair, his head falling to the side, and he moaned as Loki's tongue circled over his warming skin.

"…Loki…"

Loki’s long, slender fingers slid under Tony's shirt and slowly began to push it up. He moved his mouth to Tony's ear, breathing heavily against it. "Mmm, my love…" Tony moaned again in answer, leaning back a little as his shirt was pulled over his head. He laid his hands on Loki's chest, sliding them up to his face before Loki caught him by the wrists and put them back at his sides. "You may touch when I say so. Right now, you're going to let me do all the touching." His fingers quickly and efficiently undid the fly of Tony's jeans, and with his eyes locked on Tony’s, Loki lowered to his knees, dragging Tony's jeans and boxers down with him. "Sit."

Tony obeyed since his knees were growing a little weak anyway. He sat at the edge of the bed watching as Loki slowly and methodically untied his shoes then removed them and began to pull off his socks and jeans. "Do you have any idea how sexy you look like this?"

Loki smirked up at him. "On my knees before you, you mean? You like that, do you?" Biting his lip, Tony pushed his fingers through Loki's hair, drawing them down along his jaw, and nodded. Loki set Tony's things aside before gliding his palms up his thighs, lifting himself up to hover his lips just above Tony's.

"You're still dressed," he murmured, reaching again and again to try and kiss Loki.

"Don't worry. I won't be for long."

Tony reached around and squeezed Loki's ass, nibbling at his chin, jaw, and throat, his breathing becoming more shallow and coming faster, in pants. "You gonna ride me hard all night, baby?"

Loki's lips curved as he pulled back, slipping his fingers through Tony's hair and yanking his head back roughly. "Perhaps I will later…if you're lucky."

Finally, he lowered his mouth to Tony's, kissing him aggressively, and urging back on the bed. Tony fell back on his hands, doing his best to keep his mouth attached to Loki's and to scoot back enough on the bed that he could stretch across. He let out a soft whine when Loki pulled back and sat up on his knees. He watched, breathing heavily, and swallowing hard, as Loki shucked off his briefs, his cock bobbing, long and hard between his legs. "Damn, baby…"

Loki chuckled softly, his fingers brushing lightly along Tony's bearded jaw. "You flatter me, Anthony."

"I  _ see _ you, Loki," he replied, his nearly-black eyes focused on Loki's. Loki’s pale cheeks turned a light shade of pink. Ignoring it, he scrambled back, grabbed Tony's ankle and spread his legs more, crawling between them. Not wanting to waste any more time talking, he dived in, licking up the crease between Tony's thigh and groin. "Ohh, shit…" he sighed, dropping his head back to the bed. Loki took Tony's semi-hard cock in hand, stroking slowly while nipping lightly at his balls. It didn't take very long for Tony to grow fully hard and start to squirm and writhe. "Nnh, fuck, Loki…" Tony's back arched up from the bed, his knuckles going white as he gripped the duvet beneath them.

Loki said nothing, just continued to lick and nibble his way up Tony's shaft. When he reached the swollen head, he circled his tongue around it once, then again, before wrapping his lips around it and started to suck. Tony's his hips jerked up and he cried out at the feeling of Loki's hot, damp mouth around him.

"Loki! Ah!" His hand came down onto the back of Loki's head and his body twisted awkwardly to his side. Breathing heavy, Loki lifted his mouth so he could push Tony's hips down flat to the bed again, and immediately took his cock back into his mouth, taking him in further this time, moaning softly as he did. Tony continued gasping and Loki's name spilled from his lips on sighs and moans. Trying to get Loki to move faster, Tony pumped his hips up a few times, but Loki only flattened his palms against his hip bones to keep him down again. "S-s-suck harder, babe."

"Mm-mm. I want to enjoy this." Loki resumed his slow strokes and slow sucking, moaning a little more, a little louder, the further he took Tony's cock into his mouth, vibrating around him and making him hiss sharply. Tony's breath began to come in quicker pants and he begged Loki for more. Loki lifted his mouth again and shifted down lower. "Lift," he ordered, slipping his hand beneath Tony's thigh to urge him.

Tony did as he was told, following Loki's next order to spread his other leg further out. He was going to ask what Loki was planning to do when he felt his thick, velvety tongue slick up and over his entrance. "Oh,  _ Christ _ …"

Loki felt him tighten under his tongue and hummed in pleasure at his taste. "Relax, my love." He went in again, wiggling his tongue around Tony's hole, and pulled back again, just long enough to coat his finger with the lube he had pulled from his travel bag. Loki rubbed his finger tip over Tony's hole, and pushed through, up to his first knuckle. He decided to sit up, keeping his finger still inside Tony, but to twist it so his hand was palm up. Tony kept moaning and started to push against Loki's finger. He reached down to stroke himself and Loki politely brushed his hand away to do the job himself. Tony brought his hand to Loki's arm anyway, sliding it down to cup his hand around Loki's so they stroked him together.

"More, Loki. More…"

Watching Tony's face, Loki quickly coated his middle finger with more lube then inserted two wet fingers into him. He smirked as Tony groaned louder, panting  _ yes _ , emphatically, over and over. Tony was drowning in the pleasure Loki was giving him, his head rolling lazily from side to side. He brought his spread leg in to wrap around Loki's waist, using the leverage to lift his hips higher off the bed. Loki took his cue and started to finger-fuck Tony faster, scissoring his fingers to stretch him further.

"Ohh, fuck yes…! Fuck me…Loki."

"I do love you like this, Anthony. Coming undone under my hand." Sliding his arm under Tony's body, Loki dragged him closer so the upper part of Tony's ass and lower back rubbed over his own neglected, aching cock. His hips rolled a little, rocking along with his hand and Tony's ass.

"Loki, stop… Please…fuck me already. Baby…"

Tony lifted himself up, reaching for Loki's face, and brought him down so he could ravage his mouth. Loki growled into his mouth and pulled his fingers out, pushing forward to lower Tony back to the bed, still allowing him to abuse his lips and tongue with his own, plus his teeth. He shifted Tony's leg down and moved over him, rolling Tony onto his side. Tony was forced to break the kiss once Loki was pressed up behind him and his hand fell to the duvet, gripping it tight again as Loki took himself in hand and rubbed the tip of his cock along his perineum and around his hole.

"Fuck, don’t tease me," he whined. "Do it…"

Loki drove himself into Tony, sighing in heady pleasure as his husband's head fell back to his shoulder. Tony's hand slid down to his thigh, gripping tightly, leaving a mark for sure on the pale flesh as his fingers dug into his skin. "Does that feel good?" he asked huskily into Tony's ear, rolling his hips slowly into him.

Tony grunted brokenly, reaching up for Loki's hair. "Y-yes…! Faster. Harder.  _ Mmmm _ , Loki…!"

"As you wish, my love." Loki slapped a hand to the back of Tony's thigh, sliding it up to the crook of his knee and lifted it, spreading Tony more, catching his earlobe between his teeth.

"Oh, god…oh my god…ffffuck, Lo… _ ki _ !"

Loki released his earlobe, throwing his head back himself, and started pumping into Tony hard, grunting and groaning with the effort. Their bodies moved together, gliding, as a slick sheen of sweat covered them both. He dropped Tony's leg, clamping his hand to his hip, moving him faster and faster over his cock, grunting with each joining, calling out his name.

"Fuck! Yes, baby, yes!" Tony moaned loudly, pushing back against Loki as hard as Loki was pushing forward. His moans grew in pitch and volume, and he nearly whined as his head fell to the duvet face first. He breathed out heavily, creasing the duvet between his fingers and reached down to start stroking himself, squeezing tightly.

Loki worked, thrusting so hard his muscles were beginning to ache. He rose up a little as Tony dropped head-first to the bed. In this new position, his hands in fists on either side of Tony's twisted body, Loki started fucking him even faster. Their mixed moans, groans, and slurred repetitions of pet names filled the room, along with the faint creaking of the bed and the hushed sound of waves crashing on the nearby shore. With the pressure of Loki's body on top of him, Tony could no longer easily stroke himself. His cock caught between his body and the bed, he began to move with Loki's thrusts, practically humping the bed itself. It worked; his body trembled from both pleasure and the expectation of his oncoming orgasm.

"Loki…I'm gonna co… _ ohh! _ "

Loki's hips slowed from hard thrusts into less punishing rolls as Tony moaned loudly through his orgasm, tightening around him. He slid his hand up Tony's dampened back to his shoulder, using his fingers to turn up Tony's jaw, bending to press his lips to his slack mouth. Tony lifted up as much as he could to lazily lick at Loki's lips.

"Mmm, babe…"

Still panting as he pumped into him, Loki nuzzled Tony with his nose, nibbled on his ear. "…A-Anthony…"

Tony reached behind him to cup and squeeze Loki's ass, encouraging him to find his own release. "Come on, babe. Come for me. I wanna feel you come."

"Mmnh...keep talking like that…" he begged, pressing his forehead to Tony's hair.

"Let me turn me over."

Whining a little, Loki pushed up to his knees, slipping out of Tony, and Tony rolled over onto his back, and out of the spot on the duvet he had come on. Loki fell forward on him, reaching down to guide himself into Tony again and resumed his slow thrusting. Tony ran his fingers along Loki's sides, feeling him shiver, before cupping his ass and moving him a little faster, pressing his mouth to Loki's temple and jaw, eventually finding his mouth.

"You feel so good right here, Loki." Tony kissed him languidly, toying with his tongue before drawing it into his mouth to suck on it. "Fill me like only you can…" Loki whimpered softly, kissing him back a little harder. "Fuck me hard again, baby, with your long…hard…cock…mmnnf."

" _ Unh! _ " Loki dropped his head to press his face into Tony's neck, his arms winding around his body tightly.

"Jesus fuck, I'm getting hard again." Loki chuckled breathlessly. "You see what you do to me, babe? You fucked me so hard, but I still need you."

"Ohh, T-Tony…!"

"Pull out. I wanna feel your cock against mine."

Loki did so, and their hips began moving together again, their cocks sliding against one another. Loki pressed his damp brow to Tony's, their breaths mingling, their eyes meeting. "Mnh, g-gods…Tony…"

"Yes, baby…harder. Fuck, I want you to come. I wanna feel your come on me, all hot and sticky."

"Anthony," he moaned loudly, throwing his head back again, lifting up his upper body, which caused his lower body to press further into Tony's. Their hips moved erratically as Loki's orgasm drew near, and to spur him on Tony scratched his nails up Loki's chest and back down, right over his nipples, eliciting an obscene sound from Loki. "Fuck!" He dropped down again, kissing Tony roughly, his fingers clawing at his hair and face. "Oh — I'm gonna come!"

"M-me too —  _ ohhh! _ "

Loki's mouth latched weakly onto Tony's jaw when he felt Tony start to come again, and seconds later, he hit his own peak, spilling himself between their pressed together bodies. "Ahh…ahhh…ohhh…oh my gods…oh, Anthony…"

Breathing heavily, Tony slowly wrapped his arms around Loki. "That…was a great start…to our vacation."

Loki giggled softly, shifting so he wasn't directly on top of Tony, but up against his side. "It was. Should we call and let the kids know we arrived safely?"

Tony sighed in content, and turned to be face-to-face with Loki, kissed him softly. "Already taken care of, babe; I had Jarvis send a message to Thor and Sif when we landed." He cuddled Loki closer, humming quietly, bumping their noses together.

"Thank you for bringing me here."

"Shit, if I'd known I would get a thank you like that, I would've done it months ago."

Loki grinned then his mind drifted to thoughts of their lives the past few months. "Anthony…" He idly traced a finger around the reactor.

Tony closed his eyes, enjoying the softer touch, and nudged Loki's chin with his nose again, pushing it up so he could press his lips to a spot just under his jaw. "Hmm…?"

"I know we are meant to be on vacation, but I think we should set aside some time to talk."

Tony opened his eyes again, moving back to search Loki's face, though his eyes remained downcast, focused on the reactor. "You're right, we should. I need to talk to you about Sebastian, too."

Loki looked up then, his eyes full of concern. "What about Sebastian?"

Tony brushed his knuckles along Loki's high-boned cheek. "Later, babe. Why don't we go enjoy that awesome shower first?"

He pushed Tony back when he tried to draw him closer, and sat up, leaning on one hand. "What about Sebastian, Anthony?" he repeated a little more firmly this time.

Tony sighed, bummed to be ruining the good mood so soon, and moved into a sitting position, resting against the backboard. "Sif told me he skipped school again."

Loki's face darkened. "He did  _ what? _ " Tony gave a brief,  _ very _ brief, explanation of the situation as Sif had explained it to him. Loki shook his head in disbelief, pinching the bridge of his nose when he finished. He lifted his head suddenly and frowned at Tony. "How did he get from school back to North Hollywood?"

"I don't know; he probably took the bus. But, Loki…" He chuckled a little, hoping to soften the blow. "He didn't ditch alone. He brought back a girl with him."

Loki bolted up even further, to rest on his knees. "A girl? What were they doing?"

Wincing lightly, Tony ran a hand over his short, buzzed hair. "Well…what did you do the first time you were alone with a girl?"

Loki paused to think, groaned, and covered his face. "Oh, gods, tell me this isn't happening already."

Tony chuckled lightly and pulled Loki against him. "Sif wants us to have The Talk with him."

"And how are we to do that? He barely spared us a glance the few days we spent with everyone at Frigga's. How does she expect us to get him to sit for a whole conversation?"

"Well, let's just worry about it when we get back," he said calmly, his fingers gliding through Loki's silken hair, and his lips pressed to Loki's damp forehead. "I'm more concerned about him skipping school again than feeling up a girl on his mother's sofa."

Loki grimaced and pressed his face into Tony's chest with a whiny groan. "That was an image I could have lived the rest of my life without, thank you."

Tony laughed again and crawled over Loki's legs to step off the bed, leaning over to press his lips to his. "Come on," he urged, taking his hands and tugging him to the edge of the bed. "Let me get your mind off all this and pay you back for earlier."

Loki groaned in a completely unsexy way, but allowed Tony to get him to his feet anyway. "I don't know that I'm…" Tony leaned up to silence him with a kiss. "In the mood to…" He did it again, this time reaching down to palm Loki's cock and began to fondle him. Loki could feel himself growing hard again, already, and moaned softly. "Yes, let's talk later."

"I knew you'd see it my way." Tony grinned, linked their fingers together on both hands, and led him toward the bathroom.

* * *

What a glorious week. Every meal was eaten in the room, aside from the one night they ventured out to the hotel restaurant. But that was cut short when they could barely get through the first two courses of a five-course meal without touching each other inappropriately under the table, and Loki ended up dragging Tony into a lobby bathroom. They had barely slept, preferring to be awake and pleasuring each other. And they had done it everywhere in the suite: the bed, the shower, the tub, the sofa, the balcony. If it was feasible, they figured out a way to do it.

They were both thoroughly exhausted. They had decided together that they needed to get some sleep, especially since the reason they lost sleep at home had nothing to do with the fun marathon sex they loved to indulge in. After a long nap, Tony had showered, had a nice, frisky-free dinner with Loki, and decided to relax while Loki took his turn in the shower. He stood on the balcony of their suite in the late evening, watching as people milled around below and music played over speakers hidden in the trees of the courtyard between the hotel and the beach. He was sipping from a café latte, deciding to go a little fancy for once, smiling to himself, and at peace, when he felt two arms slip around his middle.

"Hey, babe," he greeted softly, as he laid a hand over the forearms.

Loki set his chin on his shoulder. "What are you doing out here all alone? That's only coffee, I hope. I have plans for you later that don't require alcohol."

Tony chuckled, took one last sip and set the white cup off to the side, on a patio table. "Yeah, it is. I'm just checking out the view." He lifted his arm and pulled Loki around in front of him with the other, pushing him up against the railing. "But  _ this  _ view is much better." He pecked Loki's curving lips, steadily moving along his jaw, down his neck. His hands slid down his smooth, flawless back and pushed at the band of the little black shorts he had decided to walk around in. Loki's skin was still a little damp from his shower and so fragrant, Tony kept his nose pressed to him, inhaling deeply. "Mmm, you're all soft and clean and smell like soap and forest. You're killing me, babe."

Loki hummed happily as Tony's fingers wormed their way under the band of his underwear to knead at his ass, and wrapped his arms around his shoulders. "Anthony. Anyone could see us…"

"So?" Tony brought his hands back up to Loki's chest then slowly traced his fingers down Loki's soft but flat belly, and along his cock, over the underwear, grinning when he felt him twitch a little and begin to harden. He pecked lightly at Loki's jaw, up to his ear, and down to his neck, keeping his hand moving with light pressure. "You seem to like it."

Loki inhaled sharply at Tony's touch, but when he started to lower to his knees, Loki stopped him, pulled him back up. "Wait. We have plenty of time for that later." He slid his arms around Tony's neck again. "It's close to midnight. And I just want to enjoy your company for a moment."

Tony chuckled, his hands landing at Loki's hips. "Fine, I can wait. You talk to the monsters yet?"

Loki grinned, more at Tony's hands settling on the railing behind him, trapping him between his arms, than at the mention of his kids. But that did make his heart ache a little, because he did miss his babies, and he nodded softly. "Earlier, while you were napping — at least, I spoke to Jameson and Audrey."

There was a brief moment of tension they both chose to ignore.

"They would like us to call when it reaches midnight their time," Loki added quickly, lightly scratching his nails along the nape of Tony's neck.

Tony frowned. "That's six in the morning our time."

"I know. I tried to explain that. Though, I did tell them we would call at midnight here."

" _ That _ we can do." Loki smiled and ran his hands down Tony's chest, along either side of the arc reactor, staring blindly into the blue light. Tony saw the way his eyes almost glazed over. He laid a hand against Loki’s back. "Whoa, I lost you." Loki glanced up and Tony half-smiled, his brows drawing together a bit. "Where'd you go?

He shrugged a little. "I was just…" His lips curved slightly. "I want you to know I am so happy to be here with you right now. Especially when I think of how different it was between us just two months ago."

"Loki…" Tony hands went to his waist, unintentionally squeezing the flesh there.

"No…I need to say this." He kept his eyes on the reactor and Tony saw him visibly swallow. "When you left for New York, that night we fought…I thought…I wasn't sure you were going to come back. Ever," he finished, lifting his eyes to meet Tony’s.

Tony sighed, remembering everything — his hurt feelings, his resistance to come home, and the night at the gala, then later with the woman — and ran a finger along the side of Loki's face, pushing back his hair, blowing in the sea breeze. "I know, babe. It was pretty scary how close we got to…" They both knew what he was going to say, but Tony couldn't bring himself to finish.

Loki dropped his arms to rest on top of Tony's. "We didn't really speak like we had planned to, about what was happening between us. It was more than just you missing Jameson's recital and working late every night."

Tony moved his hands back to Loki's waist. "I know. There was a lot going unsaid between us." He angled his head, trying to look at Loki's face when he lowered his gaze and could feel his fingers tense on his biceps.

"Did you ever consider…leaving me?"

Tony brought his hand to Loki's chin, cupping it firmly but not roughly, lifting it so Loki saw him speak his next word. " _ Never. _ " It made him ache the way Loki breathed out like he had been holding it waiting for his answer. "Loki…we're not the first couple to go through something like this. Neither of us are innocent here. But, I know I let work get in the way — again — and I…I really thought that you were losing interest, to be honest."

Loki paused, grinned softly. "I thought…” He chuckled now. “I thought  _ you _ were losing interest in  _ me _ ."

Tony grinned back. "See? If we had just talked, maybe we could have avoided all of this." Simultaneously, they drew each other into a tight embrace. Tony’s eyes settled on the water, watching the waves roll in. "Truth is…I've known you for twenty years now, Loki. And sometimes you still catch me by surprise and I find myself falling in love with you all over again." He pulled back enough to cup Loki's face, pressing their foreheads together. "You make my life so much better."

Loki had gripped Tony's wrists tightly when he cupped his face and half-chuckled, half-whimpered at his words. "I would do it all again, for you."

Tony shook his head, and this time, he swallowed. "Not everything, I hope." Loki laughed, lifting his head and Tony's hands dropped down to his hips again.

"If even  _ one _ thing was different, we wouldn't be right here, right now. Or we may not have one of the kids or Sif, or live in California."

"Yeah, I know all that, Loki. But…if we could do it over…then maybe…Anderson wouldn't have —" Loki surged forward, covered Tony's mouth with his own.

"Don't speak of it. Not right now, in this beautiful moment." Tony could feel his throat constrict tightly with emotion and struggled to speak. He nodded, closing his eyes against Loki's soft touch, his fingers scratching lightly in his beard.

"There is one thing I might have changed."

"What?" Tony asked, finally finding his voice.

Loki lifted his head to look him in the eye. "I wouldn't have left you for Berkeley.” Tony’s eyes widened, his lips parting in surprise. “I would have stayed and fixed things properly. Instead of running away…"

Tony’s lips curved slowly, and he reached up to catch Loki's lips in a brief, smacking kiss, and caressed the skin of his lower back. "I would've gone after you instead of letting you walk away from me."

"You should have." Their eyes met and they both laughed. But Loki quickly went quiet, his brows drawn softly over his lowered eyes. "You know I love our children, Anthony, with my all. But my life would be nothing without you."

Touched, and a little embarrassed, because he never thought he would mean that much to anyone, Tony brushed a thumb across Loki's cheek and grinned because he had to break the heavy emotion. "Yeah, I know."

Loki snorted and shoved him back. Tony let out a loud laugh, yanking Loki to him as he stumbled backward, dipped him back a little, and kissed him hard, until Loki turned to jelly in his arms. He lifted his mouth after Loki moaned against him and watched his face until Loki's eyelids fluttered open. "I love you, you annoying little shit."

Loki ran his hand over Tony's short hair, cupped his face, and smirked up at him. "And I love you, you arrogant bastard."

Tony laughed, tickled at the apt description, and kissed him again, letting his hand glide down the side of Loki's body, stopping to grab a handful of his ass through his underwear. He groaned irritably at the knock on their door.

"Oh. You go. I'm not properly dressed." Loki patted his chest, signaling for him to allow him to stand up straight. Tony whined but released Loki, nonetheless. Loki promptly turned to pour himself some champagne and Tony, his tongue poking out from between his teeth, pinched his ass. Loki yelped and scrunched his nose at Tony. With a smile, Tony headed inside, picking up his black tank up from the floor on the way, slipping it over his head, before he reached the door.

"A message for you,  _ Monsieur _ Stark," the impeccably dressed concierge said as he opened the door.

"Oh." Tony took the envelope offered, slipped the man some francs he happened to have in his pocket, and thanked him. The man bowed and left and Tony closed the door, frowning at the fancy card stock, blank on the outside. It looked like an invitation but there was no address. He glanced up as he swiped his finger under the flap, watching as Loki stood on the balcony, sipping from a flute of champagne, looking sexy as hell in his little black shorts, the lily-white skin of his mile-long legs and beautiful back exposed just for him. But when he looked down after pulling out the note from the envelope, his heart just about stopped at the familiar writing and the familiar words. He scanned it quickly — the mystery woman had upped the price for his rebuffing — then crumpled it in his palm. On a second thought, Tony decided to take the letter home and have Jarvis look up what he could on this 'M.'

And how the hell did she know he would be here, in Monte Carlo, with Loki?

"Anthony…! I think it is almost time for the fireworks. So, take those awful pants off and get out here with me."

Tony's lips twitched at his husband's words, but the letter had thrown him off-kilter. Stuffing it into the depths of his bag, hidden beneath his dirty clothes, he did as Loki bid, shucked off his pants and the tank top, and walked out in just his boxers. "I'm here, baby."

"Who was at the door?" Loki asked as he handed Tony some champagne — the same brand they had toasted with at their wedding.

"Hotel staff," he said flippantly, sidling up to Loki's side. He slipped his arm around Loki’s slim body and kissed his shoulder — not noticing the way Loki eyed him. "They just wanted to make sure we weren't going to be setting off our own fireworks."

After a moment, Loki smiled and puckered his lips for a kiss. Tony eagerly obliged. "Mmm, can't promise that, now can we?" Tony laughed and kissed him again. He stepped aside when Loki spun around, leaning his elbows against the railing, and decided to bend forward against it himself. "What is your resolution going to be this year, my love?"

"Aw, babe, you know I don't do resolutions," he said with a soft grimace. "What's the point? I always end up breaking them in less than twenty-four hours."

Loki smiled softly. "What do you think of a joint one?" Tony cocked a brow and pursed his lips after swallowing down some champagne.

"How does that work?"

Loki reached for his arm, pulling him close again, and draped Tony's arm around his waist once more, and shifted just slightly, turning into Tony. "Just for you and me, for each other — and don't misunderstand; it's not as if I believe we do this now."

"Okay. Shoot."

"No lies. No secrets. And we speak what we feel, always. I don't want to feel as if I have to hold back what I think from you again, Anthony. You are the smartest man I know, but I refuse to be intimidated by that."

Tony frowned a little. "I wouldn't want you to be. I might be a genius, Loki, but you're the one that knows how to keep this family running. We'd all be lost without you. Including Bash. And I don't ever want you to feel like I don't appreciate you, as a father, as a husband, or as my partner. I think that sounds like a really good resolution to make."

The crowed started to count down and Loki turned to watch them gathering, and pulled Tony even closer to him. "I love you," he murmured against Tony's temple. Tony rested his head against Loki's shoulder, squeezing him a little tighter.

"I know. But I love you more."

"Impossible."

The crowd suddenly erupted into cheers and whoops as the clock struck midnight. Tony and Loki turned to each other, toasting each other with their champagne, taking brief sips before they kissed, long and deep, as multi-colored fireworks burst over their heads. Loki decided to abandon his champagne, favoring the taste of Tony instead. He took the flute from Tony's hand, as well, and set it next to his. Their hands free, he brought their mouths together again, moving them together slowly, lazily. Loki joined their hands, linking fingers, and turned them until he was walking backwards, back toward the room.

"Come inside and make love to me for the first time this year."

Tony chuckled suggestively as Loki led him back inside, shoved down his black shorts, and helped him step out of them. "Definitely not the last though, babe."

"Mmnh…I hope not."

They both grunted softly as they fell to the bed, mouths still attached, hands roaming. Tony struggled to kick off his own boxers and keep kissing Loki. "Mm, that should be our resolution. Sex every day, no matter what."

Loki scoffed lightly and spread his legs to wrap them around Tony. "Sounds more like wishful thinking to me."

"We used to do it more than once a day, you know?" Tony's voice was muffled as he spoke into Loki's neck.

"I know. When we were young, in college, with no other worry but going to class." He sighed softly, slowly rocking with Tony. "I've loved these days spent entirely in bed with you. It’s as if I was nineteen again," he said with a smile.

"You  _ feel _ nineteen again," Tony growled against him, moving a little faster, but they both froze as the theme song for Audrey's favorite kids show started to play throughout the room. Tony lifted his head and scoffed. "Goddamn it, I told that girl to stay away from my phone."

Loki laughed as Tony moved off of him. "Just like her father. Ooh!" He cried out when Tony slapped his ass after he rolled over to grab his phone from the nightstand.

"Hello? Hi, Monkey. Yea — I know — we were gonna call you!" Loki smirked at Tony's high voice. "Yes, Happy New Year to you, too, baby. Hold on. Here," he held the phone out to Loki.

"Hello, my darling. Happy New Year. Oh…we've been…shopping and swimming and…stuff." He smirked and winked at Tony, who looked at him with an incredulous face, when the truth was they had rarely left the room the entire week. "What? Oh, yes, please tell me what happened."

While Loki spoke with Audrey, Tony stretched out on his belly and started to lightly lick and nibble at Loki's waist, moved down to suck on his hipbone, and crept ever so much closer to his groin. Loki, listening to Audrey, distractedly ran his fingers through Tony's hair. He hissed, his whole body flinching when Tony accidentally tugged at a pubic hair.

"Nothing, dear. Daddy just pulled on my hair…because he's mean." Tony looked up at Loki, and watching him, pressed the tip of his tongue to the head of his cock. "Ah…mm!" He turned his head sharply from the phone then smacked Tony's head with the palm of his hand, laughing into his thigh. "What, Audrey? Nothing, darling. What are your plans for tonight?"

Tony busied himself nipping at Loki's skin again, watching, fascinated, as Loki hardened from his attention. Loki struggled to listen to his daughter, until she said something that caught his attention, and made him shoot up to a sitting position.

" _ What? _ …No. Because I said so, young lady."

Tony stopped, frowned at Loki. "What?" he whispered.

"You…no, you asked; I said no. He's going to say the exact same thing. Fine. Here." He shoved the phone under Tony's nose. "Your daughter wants to know if Katie can paint her nails black."

"What!" Tony sat up on his knees, snatching the phone from Loki's fingers. "No. I don't need to hear the question; no!" Loki chuckled because he could hear Audrey whining out a long 'why' on the other end of the line. "Because…baby, listen to me. Listen. You are going to spend the rest of your life as an adult. I want you to enjoy being a little girl for as long as possible. You can start wearing nail polish when you turn sixteen like we agreed. Okay? …No. No nail polish. Your nails better be bare when we get home, kid. …Okay. Do you want to say bye to  _ Pappa _ ? I love you."

Loki took back the phone, giggling when Tony resumed his position buried in his lap then pressed a hand to Loki’s chest to make him lay back. "Bed by twelve-thirty, yes?" he said when he brought the phone to his ear. "Where's Jameson? All right, well tell him we said Happy New Year. I love you, my sweet girl. Bye-bye. …Oh. Hello." Tony popped up in Loki's face as soon as he had ended the call.

"You really want another one of those, huh?"

He smiled softly. "With you, yes. Why? I thought you said you didn't want anymore."

Tony dipped his head to rub his lips up and down Loki's neck, over his Adam's apple, and up to his ear, sucking lightly at the lobe. "I might be changing my mind. We make such beautiful monsters." He brought his mouth back up to Loki's and kissed him again, longer, deeper, wetter.

"Why now?" Loki asked between the kissing.

"What?" Tony mumbled, running his hands up Loki's sides then back down again, framing his narrow hips.

"You were so against it back in October," Loki pointed out, gasping as Tony's fingers pressed into his skin, and they started to move against each other.

"I…just changed my mind."

Loki broke the kiss, cupping Tony's face, and holding him still, searching his eyes — for what he didn't know. "Has something happened that you're not telling me of?"

Tony scoff-laughed, tugging at Loki's hands so he could move his head. "No. Loki…I just…I don't know…" Tony thought of the letter and felt his frustration grow. Remembering how easily Loki could tell he was lying, he decided to go with the truth on this one. "Bash is dead set on winning the Worst Kid of the Century award, Jazz is going to start experimenting cats or some shit soon, I just know it; and now fucking Audi wants to wear nail polish. You know what's next? Driving and proms and college. And for Audi? Makeup and short skirts and stupid boys named Skip or something. Ugh." Worn out already from the rant, he dropped his head to Loki's chest. "Please promise me we won't let out baby girl marry some guy named Skip...?"

Loki chuckled and cradled Tony's head between his hands. "Anthony, I think you're getting a little ahead of yourself."

"Oh, really?" He lifted his head. "Let me point something out to you, Loki: Bash is only two years younger than I was when I first had sex."

Loki’s face pinched as if he was in pain, his eyes drifting closed. "Can we not put Sebastian and sex in the same sentence just yet?"

Tony chuckled softly and shifted over him to rest his forearms on the bed on either side of Loki's head. "Babe, I love you. And I love our family. And the fact that you even got me to  _ want  _ a family is just…" he shook his head, at a loss for words. "I bet you Howie's probably spinning in his grave, just waiting for me to really fuck it all up."

Loki frowned as Tony lowered his head to his chest again, and brushed his fingers along Tony's forehead. "I believe if Howard had lived to see the husband and father you had become…"

"…Yeah?" Tony’s brow furrowed, waiting for Loki to finish that sentence.

"You would have finally shut him up, once and for all."

Tony smiled widely and surged up to kiss him, making Loki giggle then moan. "I love you."

"Mmm…yes…I feel that." Loki pushed up his hips, and let Tony move his body to where he wanted it, reaching out his arm for the lube before his upper body was shoved to the head of the bed. Tony swiped it from him, still kissing him aggressively.

"Are we gonna…do this?"

Loki held Tony's head in place, kissing him as he pleased, as the genius lubed up his fingers and began to prep Loki. "Mnh…are we not doing it now?"

Tony laughed, stroked himself with the remaining lube, and moved Loki so he was lined up with his cock. "No, kitten. Are we gonna make another baby?"

Loki opened his mouth to respond but a moan escaped instead, as Tony slipped inside him. "Unh… Darling…no doubt you are a very skilled lover, but… _ mnh _ , yes…even  _ you _ are not that good. Oh, gods…yes…"

" _ Nnh _ . Jesus, you're such a smart-ass! Yes or no?"

Loki gasped, panted. "C-can we talk…about this later — ohh!"

Tony growled softly, lowered his head to nudge Loki's cheek with his nose, and brushed his lips across his jaw, breathing hard against him. "Moan for me, baby. I wanna hear you." Loki did as asked, reaching down to cup Tony's ass trying to press him further into him.

"Mmnh, harder!" Tony pushed up to his knees, leaning a little more on one than the other and suddenly lost his balance.

"Oh,  _ shit! _ " he cried out, as fell off the bed, landing on the floor on his butt and then falling to his back. "Oh! Damn it!" Loki sat up, and surprising them both, laughed hard, clutching at his belly. "Thanks, babe."

"That was so…" he trailed off, laughing more.

Tony shot up and grabbed for Loki's ankle, yanking him down to the floor on top of him. Loki shrieked as Tony dragged him off the bed then laughed even more when he landed in his arms, spread across his lap. "Something funny?"

"Not at all." His lips hovered over Tony's, still stretched in a wide smile, his eyes dancing with laughter. "Did you hurt your back, old man?"

"Oh, now you're gonna get it."

"Are you going to be the one to give it to me with your sore back?" He shouted when Tony flipped up his legs and his back slammed to the carpet. Tony's laugh was evil and he let out a playful roar then pounced on Loki, and more laughter filled the room.

 


	8. Paranoia, Half-Truths, and Bash Comes Clean

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony, distracted by the continuing efforts of the blackmailer going by ‘M,’ begins to arouse Loki’s suspicions. Loki turns to Natasha for advice, but receives more information than he bargained for. Amid everything else going on with Tony, he’s finally able to put aside a day to spend alone with Sebastian and get the details behind his issues with Loki.

Tony was lying.

Loki could feel it in his bones. Even before they had become involved, back in college, Loki had always had a knack for seeing right through Tony's bullshit and bravado. Neither ever understood, or took the time to delve into why that was. Loki had always assumed it was simply because a liar could always see through another's lies. Tony rarely saw through Loki's, but then Loki, seldom, if ever, found occasion to lie to his husband. But his instincts were telling him now, that as much as Tony seemed to be convincing himself, he was lying to Loki about whatever was on the other side of that doorbell, back at the hotel in Monte Carlo. Even on the flight back to D.C., Tony seemed as if his mind was on something else.

They had been home for almost a month now. And in that time, Tony's behavior had reverted back to him being distracted and — dare he think it? — secretive. He was still home every night for dinner and even doing more around the house, like laundry and taking care of the trash; and he was still affectionate and attentive with Loki — though they had had to cut back on the sex while preparing for Sif's upcoming insemination. Still, Loki sensed something was off. He had asked ambiguous questions, nothing probing too deep, searching his husband's face for the slightest twitch of an eye or quirk of his lips. But…either Tony was getting better at hiding his tells from him, or Loki was losing his touch.

A couple of weeks after they had returned from their New Year’s trip, concerned that his greatest fear of Tony having an affair was actually happening, Loki did something he had never done in the years he and Tony had been together: he snooped. After dropping Audrey and Jameson off at school, and quickly taking care of some household errands, Loki returned to their home and stood in front of the door leading down to Tony's lab for more than a few moments. He had been trying to talk himself out of it, for no matter their problems, neither had ever resorted to digging through the other's mail, checking phones, messages, etc. But he had a feeling, an incessant niggling at the back of his mind, telling him that Tony was keeping something from him.

He had walked down into the lab, feeling his heart race at the blatant betrayal of Tony's trust. He would hate himself for it later, he knew; and likely end up confessing everything to Tony. He had paused, standing before Tony's work tables, his darkened computers, unsure now for what he should even be looking. He had opened his mouth, preparing to ask Jarvis for his assistance but he never got the chance.

Tony's voice had come from above, calling for him, and Loki froze. How would he explain being in his lab without giving himself away? And what was Tony doing home in the middle of the day? Panicking, Loki looked around for a place to hide, but because of Tony's design and layout — not all that different from what his lab had been in the tower in New York — there was hardly a space that would cover him. He‘d decided to make a run for it, perhaps make it to the kitchen before Tony saw him, and had gotten halfway up the steps when the door opened and Tony had paused two steps down.

"Hey, babe…what are you doing down here?" he had asked with a grin.

Loki had hesitated only a second before reaching for Tony and drawing him down to the carpeted steps. He had murmured between kisses, which had grown increasingly impassioned with each brush of their lips, that he had missed his husband and was merely searching for some peace of mind.

Later, after they had made love on those steps, and he discovered that Tony had gone to their regular doctor to play his part in the baby-making process, Loki comforted himself with the thought that he hadn't deliberately lied to Tony that afternoon. He had been searching for something to calm his fears; that he hadn't actually gone searching for anything only served to add to his relief. He realized it wouldn't have done anything to appease him. If he wanted to know anything, he would have to ask Tony himself.

And he had, that night, in bed. Acting like the curious and attentive husband, Loki questioned Tony about work and Pepper, and if he had heard from Rhodey lately. Tony answered his questions with short, succinct responses, but his mind was clearly on other matters, as he had answered with his mouth on Loki's neck and his hand down Loki's pants. Cleared after he had given his donation, Tony was as randy as a teenager, and aimed to make up for lost time.

Needing to get it all off his chest, and confirmation that he wasn't completely insane, Loki decided to go to the one person he knew with the most level head, and the one he knew wouldn't hold back from him.

On an unseasonably warm winter day, he sat outside a restaurant specializing in sandwiches and soup, waiting for Natasha to meet him for lunch. When she arrived, not looking at all like a mother of three in her sleek black skirt and wine-colored blouse, she stopped at the table without sitting.

"Why are you outside? It's January."

Loki looked up at her from behind his dark glasses and grinned blandly. "Hello to you, too, darling." She only cocked an auburn brow and he laughed. "It's Los Angeles, Natasha. We won't exactly freeze in this seventy degree weather."

"Fine, fine," she waved him off. "Aren't you gonna eat?"

"No. I'm not hungry." He glanced up again when his best friend of twenty years pointedly lowered her Audrey Hepburn-like sunglasses and eyed him astutely. "Calm yourself; I had a big breakfast."

"Whatever. I'll be right back." She took two steps toward the restaurant, stopped and moved back to Loki to press a kiss to the top of his head.

He smiled to himself and reached for his iced tea, taking a few long sips, before setting it down again. Natasha returned and plopped into the seat across from him, setting a small placard with the number twenty-eight on it at the edge of the table.

"Okay, so what's the big thing that's going on?"

Loki angled his head slightly. "Does something need to be going on for me to want to have lunch with you?"

"Please, Loki," Natasha muttered, removing her glasses and crossing her arms on the table. "First of all, you're not even eating. Second, if it wasn't something serious, you'd have waited for the weekend at one of the kids' games or asked us over to the house. The last time we met for lunch on a weekday like this, was when I told you I was pregnant with Xander." Her lips twitched. "Are you pregnant, Loki?"

He laughed, genuinely, for the first time in a month. "No, I'm not. But Sif likely will be in a couple of weeks."

Natasha's eyes went wide. "What? You guys are trying again?" Loki nodded. "You or Tony? And when did you decide this?"

Loki shrugged, but Natasha could tell this wasn't what Loki had come to talk about. "Anthony went in a little over a week ago. I've wanted another for awhile now. I thought…" He grinned half-heartedly, gave a shake of his head. "I thought it would help things between Anthony and me, when things weren't great a few months ago. When I brought it up to him, initially, he didn't think it was a good idea, especially with the problems we were having with Sebastian. But…he decided he wanted to try and told me so on New Year’s Eve."

Natasha's eyes narrowed, willing Loki to remove his sunglasses so she could look at his and read the emotion there. She quietly thanked the waitress when she brought her Cobb salad and raspberry tea, and went about laying a napkin across her lap. "Well…keep me updated."

"Of course," he agreed with a small smile.

"But why did you really want to see me?" She smiled a little around the forkful of lettuce she stuffed in her mouth.

Loki picked at a stray thread on his slacks. And he had to swallow past the knot that suddenly formed in his throat. "Do you think Anthony would ever cheat on me?" he asked quietly, finding himself unable to meet Natasha's gaze.

She stopped chewing for a brief moment, then rolled her eyes and continued until she could swallow. "No. But why are  _ you _ thinking that?"

Loki sighed shortly, blinking back tears behind his dark shades. "Could you take me seriously, please? Just this once."

"No," Natasha repeated, more brusquely this time, stabbing at her salad with her fork. "There's not a damn thing you could ever do that would make Tony want to cheat on you."

"Natasha," he started, tearing off his glasses now, sitting forward, and Natasha paused at the sight of his red-rimmed eyes. "He's beginning to act suspect again."

She let out a long breath, determined not to give in to Loki's paranoid ideas — especially since she'd been told of Tony's plans for a surprise fortieth birthday party for Loki — and sipped from her tea, before setting down her fork and clasping her hands together, fixing Loki with her direct gaze. "What is it now? Is he working late again?"

Loki blinked, a little thrown off by her patronizing tone. "…No."

"Has he been going out of town a lot?"

"Uh…no, but…"

“Loki,” she sighed his name and laid her hands on the table, on either side of her salad bowl. "Do you remember in college, when you two would have a fight, how you would come to me complaining that Tony's first response was always a fear that you hated him when you were angry with him?"

His black brows twitched before drawing together. "Well…yes."

"And remember how that always frustrated you because you didn't understand why  _ that _ was his first thought?" His face in a hard grimace, Loki nodded in agreement. Natasha nodded once, firmly, as well. "Similarly,  _ I _ don't understand why, when things aren't copacetic between the two of you,  _ you _ immediately think he's having an affair."

Loki scoffed quietly. "It's not just my thoughts, Natasha; he's not all there. He is there  _ physically _ , but his mind has been occupied since we returned from France. This is not in my mind."

"But why does it have to be an affair? Maybe it's work. Maybe it's Pepper. Maybe —"

"Maybe he's screwing his secretary at this very second! Don’t make me feel foolish for my feelings, Natasha!"

"Then stop thinking everything that goes wrong in his life revolves around you!" He drew back, looked away, bringing his hand to his mouth, and fisting it against his lips. Natasha let out a breath, frowning at both her best friend's behavior and her reaction. "I'm sorry," she said somewhat begrudgingly. "That was insensitive. What I meant was —"

"Don't apologize; I know what you meant."

She bit her lip and pushed her hair from her face. "Loki —"

"No, you are right. It could be anything. The problem is he just won't talk to me. He plays it off as his usual lack of sleep and stress at work when I ask. I just…in my heart," he finally looked at her, placing a hand on his chest, over his heart, "I feel that he's lying."

She shook her head, lifting her fork, twisting it in the bowl of lettuce but not really moving to eat. "I still shouldn't have said that. Well, no, I should have; I just could have said it a little…nicer."

Loki reluctantly laughed and reached for his tea. "It's fine, really," he said before bringing the straw to his lips.

"No, it's…it's not you." She sighed and rubbed her fingers across her forehead, resting her elbow on the table.

"What are you talking about?" he asked before taking another sip of his tea, frowning at her. Natasha lifted her head to meet his gaze and groaned almost comically.

"I'm pregnant." She jerked back as Loki turned his head to spit tea on the sidewalk, and belatedly laughed. "Well, that was certainly an unexpected reaction."

"Natasha!" Loki wiped a napkin over his mouth, but continued to stare wide-eyed at the redhead. "Xander isn't even six months old yet," he pointed out with a chuckle.

"I know," she cried, covering her face with her hands. "We probably shouldn't have had that wine on Halloween."

Loki laughed again. "Gods. Well…how — how does Clint feel about it? I hope you told him before me this time."

"Yeah, I did. He's…he's happy; surprised, but happy." She shrugged with a small smile. "We just never planned for four."

"You never planned for  _ one _ , love."

Natasha snorted softly and tossed a crumpled napkin at his head. "We're not here to talk about me.  _ You _ called  _ me _ ; you want something. What is it?"

Loki sighed softly, shook his head, growing serious again. "I wanted you to tell me I was right in feeling like this. That it wasn't just my…," he snarled quietly to himself, "my damned insecurities coming to the surface again."

Natasha laid her arm on the table, turning her hand palm up, waiting for Loki to lay his hand in hers. She tightened her fingers around his as soon as he had. "He's not Odin, Loki," she said quietly. Loki's eyes flicked up, glistening with unwanted tears. He almost smiled at her insane ability to read his mind. "He is never going to abandon you. He really can't; I mean, that guy wouldn't make it five minutes without you."

He chuckled, shaking his head again, as a tear rolled down his cheek. "Wouldn't he?” He flicked away the tear with his free hand, picking up a fresh napkin to dab at his damp eyes. “Sebastian seems to be doing just fine." He didn’t see the face Natasha made.

"Sebastian's an ungrateful little shit who seriously needs a good ass-kicking."

Loki bolted up, ramrod straight, pulling his hand from Natasha's. She lifted it, palm facing him, in a surrendering gesture. "Natasha."

"I'm sorry — no, I'm not sorry for saying that. I'm sorry if that insulted you. You know I love that kid like he was my own, but his behavior is starting to piss  _ me _ off."

"That may very well be, but —"

"No buts, Loki!" He quietly fumed across from her. "That kid has  _ no idea _ what you've done for him, or what you've  _ been through _ for…him." She took a moment to collect herself when her voice broke. Once she had, she vigorously shook her head, making her auburn curls swirl around her shoulders. "You don't deserve to be treated the way he's been treating you; not by anyone, but especially not by him."

Loki's jaw clenched, fighting too many emotions to pick one to concentrate on. "What would you have me do? He doesn't…" He cleared his throat, choking a little on the emotion filling his throat. "He doesn't remember any of it," he finished in a near-whisper.

"I know. But…then maybe you should —"

"I am not telling him  _ anything! _ " Loki shot up to his feet, his plastic chair clanging against the concrete as it fell backwards with the force of his movement. Natasha jumped in her chair, but he couldn't be sure it was because of his sudden movement or the intensity with which he had just spoken to her. She stared up at him, her brows furrowed in frustration, but her eyes pleading with him to understand.

"Loki."

"Don't you dare utter one word about Thanos Anderson to  _ my  _ son, do you understand me?  _ Do. You. Understand? _ " he repeated when Natasha began to shake her head.

Her face hardened, and reluctantly, she nodded. "Fine, but Loki —"

"I need to go."

"Loki." Natasha got to her feet as Loki gathered up his glasses and hurriedly shoved his arms through the sleeves of his coat. "Don't go like this. You're upset."

"Of course, I'm upset! How could you possibly think reminding a twelve-year old of the most traumatic experience of his life, which he has blocked out for good reason, would in any way be helpful?"

Natasha squared her shoulders, lifted her chin, in her signature defiant move. "Because, I happen to believe that kid needs to know  _ exactly _ what kind of father he has! He needs to be cognizant of the fact that the man he keeps pushing away, the man he acts like he has no respect for, the man who has loved and cared for him for those twelve years,  _ killed _ a psychotic, scheming, murdering rapist to save his life, and nearly  _ died  _ for him."

Loki's fingers clenched tightly, painfully, around the set of keys in the pocket of his black pea coat. Tears pooled in eyes, but didn't fall, as he glared down at Natasha, his lips and chin trembling as he spoke his next words. "I would rather Sebastian  _ hated _ me for the rest of his life than to learn of the things I did that day."

Natasha's lips parted in shock, her own eyes filling with tears. "What…why? Loki!" She reached for him as he sidestepped around her, but he threw her hand off and stormed away without even one glance back.

* * *

The letters were still coming. There was one waiting at the house when they got back from France. Luckily, it was Tony who had picked up the mail from the neighbors, who had kindly collected it while they were gone. He studied them on the plane while Loki slept; he was grateful he had removed the one from his bag before they had landed, since Loki plucked it from his hand once they had arrived home so he could wash their things.

By the end of the month, two more letters had arrived. Each time the price was raised; and with each letter the tone grew more and more ominous; purposely overly sweet, with threatening undertones. He didn't understand how this woman was getting these letters to him, and he was working overtime trying to figure that out.

Which left his mind more cramped than ever: plans and designs for new developments on other Stark technology; Loki's surprise birthday party; figuring out his day to spend with Sebastian; working on Jazz's ability to catch a ground ball before little league signups the next month, because the kid couldn't do it to save his life; and somewhere in there, he had to hope his little soldiers were marching off to do their job and get Sif good and knocked up.

Loki had asked him in passing if he preferred a boy or a girl. He had answered that it didn't matter, just another adorable, healthy baby would do; though, after more pondering, he had decided, as much as he loved his princess, he wasn't sure he could handle  _ two _ little girls. Sif and her little clone were enough.

Adding to it all, the fact that someone was trying to blackmail him was only making things worse. He could sense Loki wasn't buying his bullshit. He would do his best to tell half-truths when Loki started asking questions — and why the man suddenly became so nosy, Tony didn't know. But things took a bit of a darker turn about a week and a half before Loki's birthday.

He thought his life was about to get back on track.

When they got back from the holidays in Europe, Tony had Jarvis do some digging into the sparse information in the letters. He still didn't know  _ exactly _ who the woman was, but he did know that Jarvis would find out once he got his hands — uh, wires? — on the guest list for the museum benefit in New York. He knew the bank account wouldn't give up much; it turned out to be an offshore islands account, of course, with only an initialed account holder, M.K., which fit the M who signed each letter. And he was having Jarvis scan all of his written correspondence and cross-reference it with the notes to try and find a match.

Because he wanted to wash his hands of the whole thing, Tony had decided to take the money, all $800,000 of it, from his business account, and pay the damn woman off.

Then he had received the last letter, in which the anonymous bitch mentioned his kids, by name, and even described little Audrey. Down to the sparkly black headband she had worn the previous day to school. Blackmailing him was one thing. Threatening his kids was quite another. He secretly installed GPS chips in Jazz and Audi's backpacks, and through some tricky work, managed to get a attached to Bash's. He had Jarvis start doing periodic sweeps of the exterior of the house. And, thankfully, Loki hadn't seemed to notice his extra precautions just yet.

Things were looking up, at least, in one aspect. He was finally going to be taking Bash out for their day together. Though, he was admittedly a bit surprised the moody preteen had even agreed; Tony figured the guitar festival had a lot more to do with that than the prospect of hanging out with his dad. Tony didn't tell Loki where he was going, only because he didn't want to upset him more than he already seemed.

Something had happened between him and Natasha earlier in the week, something Loki refused to speak about, and he had been in a very snippy mood the last few days. It wasn't a big deal until Jazz had tracked a trail of mud into the house and Loki went off on him. Tony had had to step in and calm them both down after Jazz had burst into tears at Loki's yelling. They had gone to bed in silence that night. The first night in many that they hadn't made love first. Tony was about ninety-eight percent sure it was more than just Jazz's gaffe that was upsetting Loki. He figured getting Loki's hopes up about Bash returning home wouldn't be beneficial for anyone.

Tony chose to take a day off from work, a Friday, since it would be the best day of the festival to take Bash, and Loki would think he was at work. He drove out to Bash's school and took him out of class then headed to Long Beach.

Bash had grown since the last time Tony saw him, at Christmas. Taller and a little thinner in the face, Bash was still as sullen-looking as ever. And that damn hair was still all over his face. Tony had had some questionable choices in attire when he was a teenager; frosted tips and baggy jeans, as befit the 1990s, but he didn't understand the appeal of a boy shielding his face from everyone.

"Doesn't it tickle your face?" he blurted out, his thoughts rolling over in his head.

Bash's fingers, drumming out an unsteady rhythm on his thigh, stilled. "What?"

"Your hair, doesn't it tickle you hanging over your face like that?" He snuck a peek at Bash before maneuvering around a slow Volkswagen. Bash made a noise — something between a scoff and a chuckle, Tony thought — and looked out the window, toward the approaching coastline.

"I get it, Dad. You don't like the hair."

Tony laughed. "Yeah, well…it doesn't really matter what  _ I _ like, does it? It's not my head. And you're free to wear your hair any way you please. If this was the 80s you'd probably have a Mohawk."

"Is that how  _ you _ did your hair?" he asked, swinging his head around to briefly look at Tony.

"Hey," Tony chuckled and lightly shoved him. "Watch it, kiddo. I wasn't even alive in the 80s." Bash actually laughed for once, quietly, but still Tony smiled because it warmed him.

"Why'd you take me out of school today, Dad?"

Tony grinned softly. "What, I can't want to spend a day with you? You've been gone for almost two months now." Out of the corner of his eye, as he glanced in his rearview mirror, Tony saw Bash shake his head and roll his eyes.

"Maybe you miss me, but you're still full of crap."

"Since that's not far from the truth, I will let it pass, but watch your mouth." He pointed his finger Bash's way, keeping his hand on the wheel. Bash made a noise in agreement, but said nothing in response. "I guess now there're two of you who can smell my bullshit."

"What does that mean?"

"Your father's always been able to tell when I'm lying or stretching the truth. From the start. Weirded us both out; still bugs the shit out of me, but…I guess it’s like father, like son, huh?"

"I'm not like him."

Tony's fingers instinctively clenched tightly around the steering wheel and he had to hold himself back from lashing out at Bash. He didn't want to ruin the mood of the day before he really got to talk to Bash, so he deftly avoided responding to Bash's hostility. Even though it killed him. "We all miss you, you know; even Audi," he added with a lightly forced laugh.

"…Yeah, right."

Giving a sharp shake of his head, Tony pulled off the freeway, his frustration growing. "Damn it. Why is it so hard for you to believe we would miss you, Sebastian? We're your family. We love you." Bash shifted uncomfortably. "Jazz couldn't sleep through the night that first week."

There was dead silence in the car, the radio having been turned down then shut off earlier, when they began to talk. Tony hadn't told anyone that little bit of information because Jazz had asked him and Loki not to. Tony hadn't actually planned on telling Bash, but, at the moment, it seemed like something he should hear.

"Why?" Bash asked, almost meekly.

"Why? Probably because he felt like he got his big brother in trouble, or maybe because he doesn't know a time in his life when he wasn't sharing a room with you. Jesus Christ, Bash; he loves you and he misses you."

"I still talk to him…" he mumbled defensively.

"Yeah…through Ana. Big effort there, pal." Tony turned into a parking lot, his eyes scanning for a spot to park.

Bash pouted at him. "I don't know why you want me back. All you and Pop ever do is yell at me all the time. I was always grounded and everyone was always mad at me."

Tony finally found a spot, parked and turned off the car. "Wait." His arm shot out, preventing Bash from jumping out of the car. "Look, I want us to enjoy this festival together, okay? I brought you here because you're the only one who doesn't complain about my taste in music." Bash reluctantly laughed, his lips twitching into a small smile. "And I knew you would enjoy it. But…there are a lot of things I need to talk to you about today, so I'm gonna need you to do me a favor and pull your head out of your ass. Just for the day."

"What…?" Bash stared at him, his eyes, so much like Loki’s, grown wide, his mouth agape.

"Maybe those last few weeks before you left felt that way, but we didn't like doing it any more than you liked having it done to you. And, let's face it, kiddo; you're no innocent angel in this. So…can we be cool?"

Bash was silent for a moment, before he shrugged and nodded. "I guess so."

"All right, let's go."

The pair walked around for some time, checking out the different booths, and stopping at a few. Tony rarely did more than purchase items for his collection, but he resisted buying a guitar in the shape of the Van Halen logo. For Bash, though, he purchased a new pick and a leather wrist cuff with the AC/DC logo etched on it. After awhile, they both were feeling hungry and made their way to the food area, inhaling the delicious scents of barbecued meats and fried foods. Eventually, they settled on a bench overlooking the beach, discussing the different genres of music being represented at the festival over chili dogs, chips, and cokes.

"How can you not love rock music though?" Bash asked, wiping a glob of chili from the corner of his mouth with his thumb then proceeding to lick it off. "Like…I totally get Pop's taste in music cause he's all British and…whatever…but rock music is…rock music is everything."

Tony laughed, covering his mouth with one hand, and raising the other to high-five Bash. "I did  _ so _ good with you, man. You are so my boy."

Bash beamed, smiling wider than Tony had seen him do in months, but then his face fell. "You still think of me that way?"

"What way?" Tony asked, distracted, as he bit into his chili dog again.

"…As your son."

"Why wouldn't I?" He stuffed his food to one side of his mouth to ask the question, swallowing a little before adding, "You  _ are _ my son."

Bash seemed to shrink into himself, hunching over his food across the table. "Yeah, but…um, didn’t…Pop didn't tell you what I…what I said…on Thanksgiving?"

Tony frowned, but kept the smile on his face. "I don’t think so. What did you say?"

Bash swallowed and bit into his bottom lip, keeping his eyes on the table. "That…um, whatever you said to me didn't matter 'cause…you weren't my real dad."  Tony inhaled slowly, trying to mask the hurt that ached in his chest, just behind the arc reactor. He dropped the last piece of his chili dog, busying himself by wiping his hands with a napkin, before reaching up to scratch at his bearded jaw, a nervous habit that replaced stroking his chin.  "I didn't mean it," Bash said quietly. Tony could see the droplets clinging to his long, dark eyelashes. "I…I was just mad. A-and Pop already told me that I'm not allowed to say it ever again. He even full-named me."

"He — what…?" Tony cocked a brow, momentarily distracted.

Bash looked up, blinking and causing a tear to fall, which he quickly wiped away. "He called me by my full name."

"Ah, right," Tony murmured in acknowledgement. He grinned softly, trying to hide the emotion that was currently constricting his throat. He had to clear it before he spoke. "Bash, do you remember when you met me?"

Picking at the bread of the bun, Bash shook his head. "No. I don't really remember you not being around…"

Tony let out a long breath, suppressing another emotion — a different one; more pleasant, but still a tightening of the heart. "You were four; running around in that damn Viking hat, yelling foreign words at me."

He couldn't help the curve of his lips as he pictured the four year-old, hiding behind his father's leg, staring up at Tony with big green eyes full of curiosity and fear. Bash chuckled softly, causing Tony to lift his head, his eyes to his face. In that moment, Bash looked  _ just _ like Loki. In a few years, he would look like Loki when Tony first laid eyes on him — hopefully without that damn hair blocking half of his face. Bash’s hair was as shiny and black as Loki's; his skin as clear and pale as Loki's. His eyes were a lighter shade of green than his father's, but still so piercing one thought he could see right into one's soul. And Tony wouldn't even get started on the similar personalities.

"You were the absolute cutest thing I had ever seen in my life. And you scared the hell out of me." Bash laughed harder, louder, blushing a little in the cheeks. "You did." Tony angled his head a little, pushing his food away. His appetite was gone now anyway. "You changed everything about my life in a very short amount of time."

"I did?" he asked with a small smile.

He nodded. "You're father and I had been back together maybe a month or so when you asked me if you could call me Daddy." Bash grinned and blushed more. "Of course, that was back when you called your father  _ Pappa _ ." Bash’s grin disappeared and he looked away, down the sidewalk lining the beach. "Why'd you stop calling him that?"

"It's babyish," he said with a jerk of his shoulder. Tony pushed out his bottom lip, nodding. "What did you call your dad?"

"Howie." He smirked at the way Bash’s brow furrowed. "He hated that, which is the reason why I kept doing it."

Bash's brow smoothed. "You…you didn't get along with your dad?"

Tony sighed loudly, but thought this was the perfect opening to figure out Bash's issue with Loki. "Boy, that's a can of worms probably not worth opening. Let me just get rid of this stuff before the birds come and attack us." He gathered up the remains of their lunch and carried it to a trash receptacle not far from their stone table. When he returned, he opted to sit beside Bash, leaning back against the table, his elbows resting atop it. "My dad and I didn't  _ always  _ get along," he started. "We had our good moments, but they were very few and far between."

Bash had spun himself around and started to mimic Tony's position, but at the last minute decided to sit up instead. "How come you didn't always get along?"

Tony took a moment to think about his answer. "Have I ever talked to you about my mother, Bash?"

He shook his head no. "All I know is that Pop says Audi was named after her."

"Yeah, her middle name, Maria. My mother died when I was a couple of years younger than you." His lips curved a little at Bash's soft gasp, hoping to convey that it wasn't something to mourn over much anymore.

"How?"

"It was a car accident. The other driver wasn't paying attention. At the time…I was just a little kid who lost his mom and all I wanted was my dad to make me feel less alone about that."

"He didn't?"

"No." His brows drew together at his thoughts, and then he lifted his eyes to settle on Bash. "I didn't get it at the time, but as much as I lost my mother that day, my dad lost the love of his life. Now, I…" He looked away again, feeling himself get a little choked up. "I understand a little better."

"Understand what…?"

"If something happened to your father…" Tony cleared his throat, surprised by the emotion that filled him so quickly at the thought of losing Loki. "It would be like half of my heart just falling away." His eyes flicked up to Bash again and his darted away.

"…And that was why you didn't get along with your dad?"

Tony sniffled, chuckled. "Sort of, yeah. We were both angry for a long time. We blamed each other for all the bad stuff we went through. And I made it worse because I started doing things at a young age that I shouldn't have."

"Like what?"

He straightened, smiling down at Bash, almost laughing a little. "You're a nosy little kid today, you know that?"

Bash grinned. "You don't have to answer."

Tony wrapped his arm around Bash's neck and pulled him to his side, rubbing his knuckles over his hair. "Are you kidding? This is the most I've been able to talk to you in a very long time, kiddo."

Bash laughed, yelling for him to stop, and pushed him off. His hands flew up immediately to fix his hair over one eye again. "What did you do that was so bad?"

Tony scratched his fingers over his scalp, grimacing a little. "Don't tell your father I'm telling you all this. And don't think just because I did it means you can too. You hear me? I'll beat your butt. And you know I will."

Bash laughed again, making Tony smile more. "Okay."

"Truth is, I was only doing this stuff to get my dad's attention. I would never have admitted it at the time, of course. But, anyway. I had started drinking some and smoking —"

"You smoked at  _ my _ age?"

"No! I was a couple of years older."

"And you drank…alcohol?"

"Yeah…" He lifted his shoulders, but didn't seem very apologetic. "And then I started doing…things with girls that I…was really not emotionally or mentally prepared for." Tony saw the blush that colored Bash's cheeks before he turned his face away. He filed that away, wondering if he was embarrassed because of the subject or if it hit a little too close to home. On the spot, Tony decided not to tell Bash about the suicide attempt. He wasn't ready for that. Neither of them were.

"Did it work?" he asked, not really looking in Tony's direction. "Did you get your dad's attention?"

"Nah. We never really fixed our relationship. He died not long after your father and I broke up, so…" He looked at Bash and smiled softly. "My dad didn't really care about me as his only son; he was more concerned about me as his heir. I guess that makes you kind of lucky 'cause you have two dads that love you just because you're you."

After a moment, Bash rolled his eyes and groaned, dropping his face into his palm. "Jeez, Dad, I didn't know you were such a sap." He rested his elbows on his knees, continuing to laugh.

Tony chuckled, and leaned forward to match Bash's position. "I am not. Look, Bash, I just don't want you and your father to end up like me and my dad." Bash quickly sobered. "Because the truth is, when I really broke it down, the reason why my father and I clashed was so often was because we were so much alike." He jerked back when Bash suddenly jumped to his feet.

"I'm not like him!"

Tony's hands flew up, almost in surrender. "What the hell, Bash?"

Bash's mouth pulled into a tight pout. "I'm not like him," he repeated, softer, but his voice still tight with what could have been resentment.

"Okay, then," Tony said, lowering his hands. "Who  _ are  _ you like, Bash?" He swallowed, and Tony's eyes darted down toward his hands, at his sides and curling into fists.

"I'm like my mother," he declared.

"Yeah, how?" Tony challenged.

"We both like  _ girls _ , for one thing," Bash snapped.

_ Jackpot _ , Tony thought, his jaw dropping a little as his brows drew together. "So, what; you think that kind of thing is genetic? And that it comes from your mother?"

"Well, I didn't get it from  _ him _ ."

Tony had to clamp down on his temper, chuckling softly to do so. "Sebastian…"

"Maybe I got it from you." Tony lifted a brow in question, his eyes narrowing against the sun. "I've heard all the stories, Dad."

"What stories are those?"

Bash started to sway a little, bouncing from foot to foot anxiously. Tony was confused by it. "I've heard Uncle Thor and Uncle Clint talk about what you were like in college."

_ Sons of bitches _ . A certain brother-in-law and friend were going to get a mouthful from him tonight. Feigning relaxation, Tony leaned one elbow on the table and crossed his legs. "What about it?"

"Well…" Tony must have called his bluff. Bash continued to shift his feet nervously, and moistened his lips. "They said you were with a different girl every night. That you could talk any one of them into…" He cut himself off, his cheeks going bright red.

Tony angled his head. "Into what?"

Bash dropped his head, staring at the ground as he muttered, "Sleeping with you."

A part of him wanted to laugh, but in Bash’s current emotional state, Tony thought it might not go over so well. So he suppressed his urge to make a joke out of everything and worked to keep his Dad Hat on. "Maybe I could. So what? What are you trying to say here, Sebastian?"

Bash was breathing hard, and he lifted his gaze, peeking up at Tony through his lashes, and his hair, and seemed to be gathering his courage. "Why are you with  _ him? _ " he yelled out.

Tony's brows rose high over widened eyes. His mouth fell open, and he slightly stuttered before asking clearly, "Why am I with your father?"

Tears started to fill those big, green eyes. "I don't get it. You're so different."

Confounded, Tony could only shake his head. "We're not that different, kiddo."

"Yes, you are! You like cars and heavy metal and — and  _ guy _ stuff!"

"I-I don't think…th-that doesn't mean — girls are into that stuff, too, Bash. I don’t under —"

"But  _ Pappa _ 's not into that stuff!" Tony paused at Bash's slip, still slightly confused at what his point was, but not liking where he suspected Bash's rambling was headed. "He likes reading and writing and being a f…frickin’ housewife!"

Tony's face darkened. "Bash."

"And the way he  _ talks _ …”

_ “Sebastian.” _

“God, Dad, he's just so…" He struggled to find his words. "He's just  _ so _ …"

Tony's chin lowered, his eyes narrowed. "Say it." Bash stopped and stared at Tony. His chin quivered, in fear or nervousness, Tony couldn't tell. He slowly got to his feet, keeping his gaze locked on Bash's, even as Bash cowered a little under the heat of it. This was new for them both; Tony had never felt so much anger toward one of his children before, and Bash had never seen Tony look at him like that. "Go ahead; say it. Your father is so…" Bash blinked; tears fell and he looked away. " _ Gay _ , right? Is that what you were gonna say?" He stepped closer, keeping his eyes on Bash's face, but not touching him.

Finally, Bash peeked up at him through damp lashes. "…Yes."

It took Tony a moment, to quell his rage, eventually letting out a long sigh. He realized this was neither the time nor the place, or appropriate at Bash's age, to explain his and Loki's thoughts on being labeled gay. He recognized that he would have to approach this carefully, since Bash was already teetering on the edge of a breakdown. "What does that make  _ me _ , Sebastian?"

Bash got his tears under control and sniffled. "Huh?"

"Besides the taste in music and our choice of hobbies, and the way we speak, what difference is there between me and your father?"

Bash’s eyes darted around before landing on Tony's again. "Well —"

" _ Nothing _ ," he said, lifting a finger between them. Bash's breath hitched, his eyes moving between Tony's finger and his face. "Yes, there was a time I went through girls like they were potato chips and I was a starving man. But all of that changed the second I met your father."

Confusion filled Bash’s swimming eyes. "But he was a…"

"A man? Yeah…believe me, I had trouble wrapping my mind around that at first, too." Thinking of that time, of Loki at that age, remembering his identity crisis about falling in love so quickly with another man, had Tony softening. Gently, and with a small smile, he wrapped his hand around Bash's arm and moved them both to sit again. "But at the end of the day it didn't matter, Sebastian. Your father was the first  _ person _ I ever had feelings for. And he was the first who cared about  _ me _ ; not who my father was or what I could buy him."  Bash remained quiet, still sniffling and trying to calm his breath.  Tony ran a hand over the back of Bash’s head, down between his shoulder blades, lightly rubbing comforting circles. "You're too young to understand all of this, kiddo, and there's too much — _way_ too much — to the story to help you understand better. Maybe someday I'll tell you everything…"

"I wish you would tell me now."

Tony brought his hand up to rub at his own neck, feeling the tension there, and wondered if he could talk Loki into giving him a massage later. "Bash, let me ask you something.” He didn’t wait for Bash to look at him. “Are you embarrassed by us?"

Bash looked up at him now, and swallowed. "Not you…"

Tony’s temper flared up again and he sighed sharply. "You had better give me a good goddamned reason why you're embarrassed by your father."

Bash's breath hitched again, and Tony wondered if he had scared him. "It's not like he can't help it, Dad. I just wish he didn't have the long hair and look so…girly."

"He doesn't walk around in a fucking dress, Sebastian! I'm sorry." Tony turned away, covering his mouth, appalled at his own words. He breathed in and out slowly, trying to reign himself in. Behind him, Bash whimpered quietly, and Tony's heart ached knowing he was crying.  _ Fuck _ . Tony turned and reached for Bash, gathering him up to bring him close. "I'm sorry, hon. I didn't mean to yell at you. I'm just…I'm just frustrated."

"I'm sorry," Bash mumbled into Tony's shirt. Tony kissed the top of Bash’s raven-haired head, resting his cheek upon it.

"I wish you didn't feel like this, kiddo. I wish you understood…what a great man he is. You don't know how much he's helped me since he came into my life. And you have no idea what he's been through for you." Thinking about that moment eight years ago, remembering the sound of a shot ringing out and Loki's body hitting the floor had Tony's eyes watering. His attention was drawn back to Bash, clinging to him, as his thin fingers clenched tightly into his shirt.

"I'm sorry, Daddy."

"Oh, kiddo…shh…hey." Tony pulled Bash back a little, wiping the tears streaming down his pale cheeks. "It's growing pains. Every kid goes through some shit like this with their parents. I don't know about your mom, but since both of your dads went through more dramatic shit than anyone should, it should be expected for you to be even more drama." He smiled to put Bash at ease and released him, so Bash could wipe at his face. "Let me ask you something, kiddo…"

He sniffled. "What?"

"Is this why you've been such a pain in the ass lately; because you're embarrassed by your father?"

Bash looked down and away then back up. "…I dunno."

Tony frowned again, pulling back further, studying Bash's face. He was so much like Loki, he didn't even know it. The way he would just start to open up then quickly pull back again. And just like with Loki, Tony had to be blunt. "What's going on at school?"

He grinned smugly to himself when Bash put more distance between them, even turning from him, swiping a hand under his nose. "Nothing."

"I don't believe that for a second."

"I don't care," Bash snapped, glaring up at Tony.

"Watch it," he said so firmly, Bash winced. "Don't think for a second I won't smack you in public for talking to me like that. Tell me why you've been skipping school so much."

Bash’s eyes went wide again, before he turned away. Apparently, it was a shock that Tony knew about that. "Because…because I don't want to be there."

"Why?" Bash hunched into himself at Tony’s shout. "Is it the teachers? The classes? The other kids? What?"

Though he was all arms and legs, and lanky with it, Bash moved quickly and almost gracefully, as he spun around to fully face Tony. "They all think  _ I'm _ gay!"

For the third time that day, Bash took Tony completely by surprise. He wished, badly, that Loki was there in that moment. He would probably know better how to handle this. As it was, all he could think to say was, "Who?"

" _ Everyone! _ Because of you and him they all think I like boys, too! Everybody knows who you are and they know who Pop is and they know I'm your kid and they think it's some…like, family trait or something."

Tony struggled not to laugh and pinched the bridge of his nose, lowering his head so Bash didn't see his lips curving. Kids could be so stupid. More serious now, he reached out for Bash's face but the boy jerked himself away. Tony just reached again. "Kiddo, kiddo, listen to me."

"No," he whined, doing his best to avoid Tony's hands, but eventually he gave in and went still, letting Tony hold his face between his hands.

"Listen to me: it doesn't matter what anybody thinks. It's what you know in here…" Tony touched a finger to Bash's temple. "…and here…" He pressed the same finger to the center of his son's chest. "…that matters."

"B-but…"

"No, no buts, Bash. All you have to do is figure out how to handle this. You have to find…your thing. You know? Like, I have sarcasm and brilliance. Your mom and your Aunt Natasha could both probably kill a man with just their finger, if they wanted. And your father! He has that clever way of using big words and twisting them so  _ you  _ sound like the idiot."

Bash laughed weakly. "But what if I don't have a thing?"

"You do." He cupped the boys face again, giving him a little shake. "You just haven't figured it out yet, kiddo." He sighed and wrapped an arm about Bash's shoulders. "I don't know what's wrong with the kids at your school, or why this is still something to pick on kids about in this day and age…but you can't let them do this to you. Running away never solved anything. Your father and I learned that lesson together."

"Dad…" he sniffled again. "Um. A boy kissed me."

Tony froze.  _ Jesus Christ, he really was just like his father _ . What was he supposed to say? Where the fuck was Loki when he needed him? Why did he ever think it was a good idea to do this alone? "Okay. Um…when did this happen?"

"The first month of school," Bash muttered. Tony was glad they were sitting side by side. They probably had identical masks of humiliation screwing up and coloring their faces. He could feel his cheeks burning.

"Where?" Bash lifted his head, lifting a brow. "No, not — I meant, where were you when it happened? Not where did he put his — uh, ahem…"

Bash whimpered again and dropped his face into his hands. "At school. At lunch. I don't…" He dropped his hands and turned to Tony. "I didn't do anything to make him do it, I swear, Dad."

Tony let out a half-chuckle. "I'm not mad at you, Bash. I'm just…is that why you were ditching school?"

"Yeah…" Bash answered, deflated, his shoulders drooping.

"Why? Were the kids teasing you about it? Wait a minute. Is that why they think you're — you like boys?"

"Yeah…"

"Is that why you ditched with that girl?" Bash peeked up at him. "So you could prove that you really like girls?"

"Maybe…?"

Tony let out another laugh, a higher-pitched one this time, and mirroring Bash's earlier move, he covered his face with one hand. "Jesus, Bash. Why didn't you just come and talk to us? You know we would have tried to help you out."

" _ You _ could've, maybe," Bash muttered like the sullen teenager he was growing up to be.

"What…,” Tony had to rein in the tickled chuckle that bubbled up in his chest. “What do you mean? Why just me?"

Bash groaned softly, wincing. "Because…you…like…boys and girls…"

The laughter dying away, Tony frowned deeply. "Wait. What are you trying to say, kiddo? Did you…did you  _ like _ it when that boy kissed you?"

"No!" He scrunched his nose. "…Maybe. I dunno…I didn't  _ not _ like it. I don’t know. I was confused. But that's why I started kissing all the girls!"

" _ All _ the — how many girls did you kiss?!"

Bash's eyes went wide for a moment. "Uh, I don't know…like, twelve?"

Tony gasped almost quietly, pressed a hand to his forehead. "You can't even keep count? For god sake's, Bash. Rule number one: You. Always. Keep. Count!" He emphasized his statement, slapping his hands together with each word. Bash leaned away a little, eyeing Tony curiously.

"Dad."

"Shit, sorry. I'm just…" He rubbed his fingers over his forehead. There was a possible migraine brewing there, just behind his eyes. "I'm a little… You're throwing a lot of information at me at once, kiddo. I didn't expect to have these kinds of talks with you for at least another couple of years."

"Sorry."

"No." He chuckled and laid a hand over Bash's shoulder. "Don't be sorry. I want you to be able to talk to me about anything. It's good we're getting all this out, but let's back up a little bit. Why do you think I would be the only option to talk to? You have three parents and a buttload of aunts and uncles."

"Because you're the only one who like boys _and_ girls," he answered matter-of-factly. "Don't you?"

Tony sighed softly and shook his head. "Not really, kiddo.” Bash frowned. “Yes, at one time, I really liked women. All kinds: blondes, brunettes, redheads, tall ones, short ones —"

"I get it, Dad," Bash interrupted with that familiar roll of his eyes.

"Right. Sorry. Uh…I do still think some women are attractive, but…there was only ever one man: your father. It was unexpected; it came as a total shock to me, but, honestly, after I met him and got to know him, and fell in love with him, not even the most beautiful woman in the world couldn't tempt me from him."

Bash gaped at him. "Oh."

"But there isn't just me. Like I said, you could have talked to your mom or your father, Bash."

He scoffed, but smiled. "Mama helped a little with the girls. And told me way too much about their bodies. Gross."

"Thanks for reminding me; that's another talk we need to have." Bash scrunched his nose again; this time in disgust.

"But I don’t think I want help getting a boy, so why would I go to Pop?"

"Uh…" Tony chuckled almost nervously. "Kiddo, I'm curious: how is it do you think you got to be here?"

Bash stared blankly before he lifted his brow in such a way that Tony had to suppress his smile because he looked exactly like Loki when Tony was on the receiving end of one of his bitch faces. "Dad, I'm almost positive you know how babies are born."

Tony smiled. "Yes, I do. Do you?"

He scoffed again. "Thanks to Mama and Sex Ed, yeah. But  _ you _ didn't...you know." His face turned a light shade of red. " _ Do it _ , with Mama to have Jazz."

Tony smiled wide. "That's true, I didn't. Jazz and Audi were both conceived through insemination. But  _ you _ , the kid formerly known as Sebastian Daniel Odinson," Tony tapped his nose playfully. "You were conceived by two people in a relationship, the good old-fashioned way."

Slowly, the grimace formed on his young face. "Ugh…you mean…my  _ parents _ had sex?"

Tony inadvertently barked out a laugh. "That's kind of what people in relationships do, kiddo. Actually, even people who  _ aren't _ in relationships do it a lot, too."

"Eww!" Bash's arms flailed, like he was trying to shush Tony. "Gross! It's bad enough I have to listen to  _ you _ and Pop have sex!"

Tony cut off his laughter again. "What are you so embarrassed about, Bash? Sex is a part of life. A very  _ fun _ part of life…" He wiped the smirk from his face when he remembered who he was speaking to. "…That you should not be a part of for a very long time." To show he was serious, Tony aimed a finger at Bash forcefully.

Bash scrunched his nose again and stuck out his tongue. "Believe me; I don't want to."

Tony, happy the tears had stopped, brushed his fingers through Bash's hair, holding it back for a moment so he could see both of his eyes with no obstruction. "You will one day. Just make sure you come and talk to one of us first."

"Deal." Tony chucked him under the chin and sat back. It was quiet for only a moment before Bash spoke up again. "So…Pop's really done it with a girl?"

"At least," Tony answered on a laugh. "If you want to know more, you gotta talk to him." He straightened when Bash's face fell.

"I can't. He hates me."

"Why the hell would you think that?"

"Because of the stuff I've said to him."

Tony swung his leg over the bench and bent his head to be face level with Bash. "Look at me." Bash flicked his eyes up, but didn't lift his head, so Tony cupped his hand under his chin and tilted it up himself. "Do you understand the concept of unconditional love, Sebastian?"

Bash tried to shake his head but couldn't because of Tony's grip. "No."

"It's affection without any limitations. Your father and I, that's how we love you — all of you; unconditionally, without any limitations. That means no matter how much of a little shit you're being, we will still love you. You were his first, Sebastian. There's always going to be a special little corner of his heart that belongs to you, and only you."

Bash’s big jade eyes watered. "How do you know that?"

Tony sighed, softening his hold on Bash's chin before moving his hand up to cup his cheek. "Because you were  _ my _ first, too, kiddo.” Tony’s voice was thick, and he smiled, showing no teeth, and did his best to fight back those pesky emotions again. Fighting tears, too — and less successfully — Bash crawled forward to wrap his arms around Tony's torso. Tony held him for a few long moments, listening to the pleasant sound of the waves.

"Dad? Will you take me home?"

Tony breathed a quiet sigh of relief. "I thought you'd never ask."

* * *

 

The drive home was quiet, but the car was filled with Bash's nervous tension. Or maybe it was excitement. For when they arrived at the house, Bash rushed inside ahead of Tony, bypassing his brother, playing in the living room, and headed for the kitchen, where he could smell that dinner was in the midst of being made. Loki and Audi were there, the little girl regaling her day at school, stuttering off when Bash ran in, straight to Loki, and crashed into him. Loki laughed, but when he saw who it was that wrapped around him, his jaw dropped in shock. He looked up, his eyes searching frantically for Tony.

Tony had stepped in, Jazz by his side, and caught Audi as she leapt into his arms. Loki looked to him, a question in his eyes, and Tony smiled, mouthing,  _ He's home _ .

Loki hugged Sebastian tightly, tears filling his eyes, as he mouthed back,  _ Thank you _ .


	9. Happy Birthday, Loki Stark

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s Loki’s 40th birthday. He spends most of the day alone with Tony and is later surprised at the Barton house by the party Tony planned. Frigga, Thor, and even Dr. Banner are there to celebrate with him, and Sif quietly announces that she believes the insemination was successful. Elsewhere, Thor and Sif separately question Tony about his newest security measures, Ana avoids Bash, and Loki seeks to make amends with Natasha.

"Ba-abe…," Tony called to Loki as he entered the master bedroom, keeping his footfalls quiet still, as he walked to his husband's side of the bed, kneeling by his sleeping form, trying to draw him from his deep slumber. "Baby…?"

Loki groaned softly but made no effort to move or even open his eyes. Tony whispered his name, but the only movement he made was to bury his face into his fluffy pillow. "Hmm…?" he hummed softly, as the rest of his body curled into itself.

Tony smiled and reached out, lightly brushing raven strands from a peaceful, resting face, pushing them over a pale bare shoulder. "Wake up…" He leaned in close, his fingertips gliding across Loki's forehead, willing those long-lashed eyelids to lift. "Babe…" Loki hummed in question and sleepily swatted at the fingers touching his face.

"Why?" he croaked out. He hummed again, happily this time, when he felt soft lips press to his forehead then his cheek, and finally, to the tip of his nose. "Mmm…?" He smacked his lips, asking for one more peck. Tony was only too willing to indulge his husband.

"I made breakfast for you."

Loki inhaled deeply and rubbed the back of his hand over his eyes, causing his hair to fall over his face again, and then shoved it back. "What time is it?"

Tony turned his head to glance at the clock on Loki's bedside table. When he looked back at Loki to answer, he had to pause, watching as Loki stretched his long body in the bed, arching his back, causing the sheet covering him to fall from his torso, to pool at his waist. His mouth went completely dry. "It's…uh, just past nine."

Loki shot up in the bed, causing Tony to fall down to the floor on his butt. "Nine? The children —"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa…!" Tony sat up and ushered Loki back into the bed when he tried to get up, sitting beside him to keep him under the blankets, taking his hands in his. "Don't worry about it, babe. I got them up earlier and out of the house half an hour ago. Natasha and Clint are going to take care of them today." He lifted Loki's hands to his mouth, brushing his lips over the knuckles on both, paying special attention to the silver ring, outlined by two black stripes, on his ring finger. Loki never took it off. "Happy birthday, Loki Stark." He smiled softly, looked directly into Loki's soft green eyes.

Loki's lips curved slightly at the corners, but he didn't look all that happy. His eyes drifted closed after Tony lowered his mouth to his again then peppered his face with kisses, making him laugh. "Nnh, you're very affectionate this morning, aren't you?"

Tony grinned and drew Loki up, into his arms, pressing his face into the crook of his neck, inhaling, filling his nostrils with the signature scent of forest. "It's the anniversary of the birth of the best man I know. And he just happens to be the love of my life, too. It's my favorite day of the year."

Loki let out a soft laugh as Tony kissed his way up the side of his neck, nibbling playfully at his ear, and placed a loud smacking kiss to his cheek. He grew a little more serious when Tony drew back. His eyes dropped to their joined hands, flicking up every few words or so as he spoke. "I waited up for you after hearing you leave last night." Tony's lips parted but Loki spoke again before he could explain. "Where were you?"

"At work," he answered apologetically. "There was an issue with the system. No one could get out of the building. I had to go down there and manually reset the entire thing. Even Jarvis was down. It took longer than I expected it to — some bug or some shit. IT is still working on it. But I felt bad for all the security guards and janitorial staff that had to stay late, so I took them to the nearest open place and bought them all a meal."

Loki smirked. "That sounds almost ridiculous enough to be true."

"It is!" he defended with a laugh and big smile.

It wasn't  _ entirely _ true. There had been a security issue, and Tony’s people were still working on what happened, but there hadn't been a need for him to go down there and leave Sif's apartment. He had gone to her place after dinner to help her finish up the food for Loki’s surprise party later that day.

"I'm sorry you waited." Tony draped himself over Loki again, slipping his fingers through his silky black hair.

Loki seemed to relent at his touch, covering Tony's hand with his own, and turning his face into his palm. "It's fine. I spent the evening talking with Sebastian." Tony smiled and brushed his thumb over a sharp-boned cheek.

"Nice to have him home, isn't it?"

"Mmm," he nodded and nuzzled into Tony's palm. "Thank you, by the way, for telling him about my torrid past with women."

"Uh, I…" Tony stuttered, thrown off by the contrast between Loki's soft purring and the underlying accusation in his statement. "I didn't tell him everything."

Loki grinned. "You told him enough, Anthony." He took the rough hand from one side of his face, holding it between his own at his mouth. He pressed his lips to Tony's fingers then rested his cheek upon their joined hands. "At least enough to get his curiosity piqued. It worked out, in the end; we had a long talk about what he's been dealing with. He's a very nosy boy. He asks very probing questions. And he's entirely too intelligent for his own good. I never realized it before," he murmured with a soft frown, distracted enough that Tony could pull his hand from Loki's fingers and brush the backs of his fingers along his cheek and down the side of his neck, cupping a hand around the long, pale column.

"He's  _ you _ ."

Loki smiled, genuinely, and green eyes fluttered up to meet his. "I was more discreet about it. Oh, and I'd also like to thank you for leaving it to me to have the…the sex talk with him." A soft moan escaped him when Tony leaned over and pressed his mouth to his throat and flicked his tongue up the skin.

"And I'm sure you did a much better job than I would have," he said into Loki's dampened skin, adding small bites and nibbles. "What else did you talk about?"

"W-we…um…did you know he d-dropped out of  _ Romeo and Juliet _ last fall?"

"Really? He didn't even tell us he got a part. Did he say why?" Tony shifted again, this time moving over Loki's legs to stretch out next to him on the bed, to bring him closer to his mouth, now nipping at his jaw.

"N-no…nhh…" Loki made a soft sound, encouraging Tony, tilting his head back to give him further access to the neglected side of his throat, and turned the upper part of his body toward him. "But…he-he's decided to…to audition for the spring…mnh…play."

Tony's lips curved against Loki's shoulder. With the excitement of Sebastian coming home, and Loki still a little grumpy about, and avoiding, Natasha, the two of them hadn't been alone together like this for more than a week. He relished in the fact that, after all this time together, he could still get Loki to whine with need like he was now. And he hadn't even slipped a hand down his pants yet. This wasn’t exactly on the agenda for the day, but who was he to deny his husband or himself? He continued to lap at Loki's skin, marking it with not just his lips and tongue, but with his bristly beard, drawing moans and grunts from the body starting to press firmly against him. 

"What play is it?" he asked huskily against Loki's ear, his lips curving because he knew Loki was too far gone to have this conversation. As if to prove his point, fingers clenched in Tony's hair and in his t-shirt at his back.

" _ Unh _ …I…what…?"

"What play?"

Loki pushed and kicked at the sheet covering his legs, moaning softly when Tony slipped his leg between them. He moved against the denim-clad thigh, finding a satisfying friction to rub his growing erection against, which was trapped behind his thin cotton pants. He moved his hips faster, grinding harder, practically humping Tony's leg. "M-ight we talk about this later?" he begged through heavy pants.

Tony's hand dropped down to Loki's ass, clamping onto it tightly and groaning roughly into his dark hair as they rutted against each other. "You want something else, birthday boy?"

Loki muffled his own cry when his ass was grabbed, his hands curling into Tony's shirt again, now at his chest. "You…I want you, Anthony. Darling…" Tony's hand slid around Loki's hip, his fingers dancing teasingly along the hard ridge of his cock before moving back to his ass.

"What? What do you want me to do to you, Loki?"

A soft breathless laugh sounded in the room as Loki threw his head back. Bringing blazing green eyes back to heated chocolate brown, Loki bit into his bottom lip, and smirked up at Tony. "Fuck me, Anthony."

Instantaneously, Tony reached between their bodies, rushing to get his jeans undone and as far down his hips as he could manage. The moment he had lifted up from Loki, Loki glanced down and followed suit, lifting his hips and shoving his pajama pants over them, managing only to release one leg. Loki gasped softly when, in his haste, Tony ripped apart the other leg of Loki's pants and tossed the pieces aside, before spitting into his hand and rubbing his wet fingers around Loki's hole, inserting one in and out a few times. With his jeans pooled around his knees, Tony positioned  himself at Loki's entrance, and with a soft grunt, pushed himself into Loki, groaning with it, until he was completely sheathed inside him.

They moaned quietly in unison. Loki arched up, one hand moving to Tony's thigh beneath his instinctively, squeezing tightly, his body positively vibrating with need. "Don't…don't stop." His breath was coming fast, his short, manicured nails dug into Tony's skin, which only served to urge him on.

Tony huffed out a sharp breath, shifting to get himself in a comfortable position, and paused only to rip off his shirt, then found his grip firmly on Loki's hips. He started to move, pumping his hips in a rhythm that had Loki's body trembling, his hands gripping the sheets so tightly his knuckles went white. Tony's pace made his knees and back ache dully, his muscles burned, but Loki's reaction, that sly smirk curving his lips; his eyes, darkened from desire, glittering up at him with an almost mischievous glint, had Tony driving himself deeper and harder into Loki, nearly impaling him.

It had been a long time since one of their unions had been this aggressive. Tony slid a hand up and down one long, pale thigh and calf, hooking it into the crook of his knee, and lifted Loki's leg to rest over his shoulder. His tempo stuttered and broke for only a moment as he shuffled himself even closer to Loki's lifted hips, and leaned forward, his other hand clasped onto the edge of the headboard to give him some balance before he started to move again.

Loki's words were lost amid sharp hisses and choked grunts. His head rolled aimlessly from side to side on the pillow, for he was unable to lift it, to look into Tony's eyes as he made their bodies become one, repeatedly. His other leg stretched out as far as it could go, trembling almost violently, as white-hot pleasure coursed through him.

"Babe…" Tony breathed out the endearment on an affectionate sigh, turning his face into the firm calf by his cheek, nipping with his teeth at the flesh. "No one can hear you. It's just you and me. Scream for me, baby."

"Ah! Ah…wait." Loki panted and pressed his fingers to Tony's lower abdomen.

"What?" Tony slowed to a stop and leaned back.

Loki didn't respond. He only increased the pressure to Tony's belly until he could move. He curled his legs up, removing the rag that was now his pajama pants, and twisted his body until he was on all fours. He reached behind him for Tony, finding his hip and brought him closer. "Now, Anthony. Take me now. Take me like this."

Tony smirked and did what was asked of him; taking himself in hand, stroking lightly, then lining himself up with Loki again. He leaned over Loki, pulling his long raven hair out of the way, so he could latch his mouth onto the curve of neck and shoulder, and entered him. Loki hissed softly, turning his head, his face up, to meet Tony's mouth, and pressed back into him. "Mmm, like this, baby? This what you wanted?" Tony growled against his lips.

Loki's breath was ragged, staccato, and hot against Tony's face. He couldn't speak, couldn't form any words; a short bobbing of his head his only way of communicating with his lover. All of his concentration was on the feeling of Tony inside him, moving in and out steadily, repeatedly brushing that sweet spot, sending sparks of heat shooting up his spine. But Tony's mouth, those full lips surrounded by dark lightly graying hair, that thick pink tongue that could by itself bring him to orgasm, was right there. Teasing, taunting, tempting. Loki watched, his forehead pressed to Tony's sweat-damp temple and his vision beginning to go blurry, as that tongue slipped out to lick at Loki's parted lips, just touching the tip of his nose. He moaned, whined really, because his own tongue just missed making contact. Then Tony did it again, and this time, Loki was ready for it; he caught it between his teeth, careful not to bite, and drew it deeper into his mouth. His lips curved, and he brought his hand up to the back of Tony's head, when he moaned obscenely into his mouth.

With two gruff cries, Loki tore his mouth from Tony's, and threw his head back, an arm flying out to steady himself against the headboard, to keep himself up. The clanging of the wood against the wall from their wild movements was just barely registering. His knees, legs, everything, was quivering, threatening to give out, as Tony pushed into him relentlessly. It had been so long since they had fucked like this, Loki wondered if his now forty-year old body could handle it.

“Fuck…babe, I'm gonna come," Tony managed through clenched teeth.

"No…not yet…"

Tony let out a short bark of a laugh and pushed up to his knees, sliding his hands down Loki's sides to rest at his hips, clenching his fingers in the soft flesh as he guided their bodies together and apart. "I can't go much longer — Loke…oh!" Tony yelped when Loki shoved him, making him fall back awkwardly to the bed, and mounted him, picking up right where they left off.

"I'm close, love…" he breathed out, circling his hips over Tony.

"Fuck." Tony gripped Loki's hips and watched as his husband moved over him, losing himself in the pleasure that flushed his entire pale body with a light pink hue and a thin sheen of sweat. Loki dropped a hand to Tony's on his hip, dragged their joined hands to his cock, moving them over his length. Loki released Tony's hand, leaving him to stroke him to completion, and balanced himself, hands framing the arc reactor, as he moved faster and faster. "Oh, yes…fuck yes; use me, babe," he groaned out, struggling to hold off his own release as best he could. "Come on, let me hear you."

"Ah, Tony…! Oh…! Gods…! Yes…! Tony!"

"Shit!" A slew of curses tumbled from Tony's lips when Loki clenched around him like a vise and spilled himself over his fingers. Tony reached his climax just seconds later, pushing Loki's hips down and holding him there as he shot himself hard and fast inside him. Loki fell forward, mouth latching onto Tony's as his hips moved in circles over Tony's cock as he rode out his tear-inducing orgasm, his body spasming until he simply collapsed against Tony.

Equally spent, Tony's arms dropped down to the mattress, breath coming in loud, heavy pants. They laid there for some time; the only sound in the room was their eventually slowing breaths. Tony, spread-eagled, jeans crumpled and bunched around his calves; and Loki, in a heap of pale flesh and bones on top of him. Weakly, and with a great deal of effort, Tony raised his hand, placing it on Loki's back, sliding it up and down the still damp skin.

"Babe…?" His hand paused. He could feel Loki's heart still racing rapidly, his muscles twitching with each beat, and waited for a response.

"…Nnh?"

"You okay?"

Loki groaned and slowly unfolded himself, rolling onto his back, and continued to roll until he could bury his face in his arms. "No…," he mumbled, before turning his head just enough to be able to breathe. "I believe you have broken me."

Tony chuckled and did his best to kick off his jeans without having to actually sit up and remove them. Once his legs were free, he rolled onto his side, reaching out to clear Loki's dark hair from blocking his face. "Is that a bad thing?"

One side of Loki's pale red lips lifted and he just barely cracked open his eyes. "Not in the least, darling."

A smug smile curved Tony's mouth as he leaned in to rub his lips over Loki's. "…You hungry?" he asked before brushing his lips over his jaw.

Loki's eyes rolled close and he hummed softly. "Mnh…yes, but I cannot move right now."

"That's okay. I'll bring it to you." Tony moved to roll away again, pausing when his wrist was caught in long fingers. He looked back at the sleepy eyes peeking up at him.

"Thank you."

Tony grinned and bent to press a light peck to the tip of Loki's nose. "What kind of husband would I be if I didn't spoil my man on his birthday?" Loki's gaze fell, and for a moment, Tony wondered if he had said something wrong.

"I'm sorry…"

He frowned, absently toying with Loki's fingers. "For what…?"

Loki remained quiet for a moment. "I know I've not been very pleasant to live with these last few weeks."

Tony made himself more comfortable again, taking Loki's hand firmly in his. "You haven't been so bad. Plus, I know it wasn't anything I did — well. At least, I hope it wasn't me. Or the kids, so…"

Loki's eyes flickered up to his, his lips pressed together. "No, it wasn’t you. It was something…something Natasha said." His eyes fell again, to their joined hands, where he tightened his grip. He went quiet for a beat, concentrating on Tony's hand like it was the most important thing in the world. "And I wasn't very kind to her about it. Yet, still she takes care of our children when asked."

Tony's brows drew together. He wasn't sure if he should interject with a question, or just let Loki continue to slightly ramble. Luckily, Loki decided for him.

"Something she said has been on my mind since she said it."

A spark of irritation made Tony's eyes narrow for a brief moment. Why had he waited so long to tell him? "What did she say?" he asked in a calm, almost soothing voice that belied his true feelings.

"She said…" Loki’s voice tapered off and he lifted his gaze once more. "Do you think Sebastian remembers that day?"

A chill crept over Tony, his fingers tensed around Loki's. He didn't need any clarification as to what day Loki was speaking of. "No," he answered slowly. "Why?"

"I…" Loki lowered his lashes again, so Tony was unable to look into his eyes. Eventually, he simply shook his head. "It's nothing."

"It's not 'nothing,' Loki. Why would you ask me that?" He nudged Loki's cheek, pressed against his arm with his knuckles, forcing him to meet Tony's gaze. He grinned halfheartedly, his lashes fluttering as Tony rubbed the backs of his fingers against his soft skin.

"Let us talk later. I don't want to speak of it now."

"Loki."

"I promise; we will." He cupped Tony's cheek with his free hand. "But now is not the time for it." He smiled and reached for Tony, pulling him closer, and scratching his fingers along his bearded cheek. He made a disappointed sound when Tony grabbed his wrist and pulled his face from his grasp.

"Loki —"

"Anthony, please?" He pleaded, with both words and eyes, pushing up onto his elbow. "I may not be very happy about the incredibly large number that is now my age, but it is still my birthday." Ignoring Tony's hard look, he snuggled into the man, sighing at his warmth. "What have you planned for me today?"

Tony knew it was pointless to argue. And he didn't want to end up pissing off either himself or Loki, or both of them, and ruin his surprise party later, so he reluctantly let the subject slide. His arms automatically went around Loki's slim frame when he burrowed into him, his lips curving at the connection. "Nothing," he answered softly.

"Nothing…?" Loki jerked back to look up at him and Tony nodded.

"We're picking up the kids at six and going to dinner, but other than that…" He tried to keep his smile from spreading too wide so as not to give anything away. It must have passed Loki's bullshit meter; he only smiled softly at Tony.

"Where are we having dinner?"

Tony chuckled because he hadn't thought of an answer. "Don't worry." He brushed his thumb over Loki's cheek, his eyes roaming over the face of the man with whom he had spent more than half of his life. There may have been a few more wrinkles around the bright green eyes and across the broad forehead, and maybe outlining those pale red lips; and yes, there were more than a few gray strands peeking out here and there amid the ebony of Loki's hair. But when Tony looked at Loki, he still saw that sexy, skinny nineteen year-old with a snarky attitude, with whom he fell in love so many years ago. "It'll be nice enough to celebrate your birthday, but casual enough that our little hoodlums won't embarrass us — much."

"Hmm…and what will be my meal choices?"

Tony snickered, tickled at the question. "You can have your choice of steak or pasta, or both." His brows bobbed up and down suggestively. "You're gonna need your strength for tonight."

Loki's tongue poked out to run across his upper lip and he glanced over his shoulder at the clock on his nightstand. "I've eight hours of freedom from our so-called hoodlums and you all to myself; so why should I wait for tonight?" Tony's smile was slow and seductive. Their lower halves brushed together as he pressed their bodies together and he felt Loki's half-hard cock twitch against his own hardening length. "Mmm…" Loki lifted his face, nuzzling his nose to Tony's chin, and puckered his lips, silently requesting a kiss. Tony happily obliged.

"Hey. I thought you were hungry," he murmured against Loki's wet lips, moaning brokenly when Loki's tongue glided along his, and his bottom lip was sucked on.

"I am." His hips bucked up and he started a slow, wet trail down Tony's throat, stopping and concentrating on one spot on his collarbone, leaving a darkened spot.

"Mmmm…yeah, for what? Me?" Tony pushed himself up, allowing Loki to reach more of his neck, and subsequently, ground himself into his husband.

"Hnnng…yes, perhaps…" Loki widened his legs, rubbing a soft thigh along Tony's more firm one, and slid both hands down to grip onto a pert bottom.

Tony grinned. "Am I your present?"

Loki hummed a soft laugh. "Will you let me unwrap you, husband?"

"Mnf…" Tony moaned, his lower half moving against Loki, shivering at the friction they were creating again. "You've had me unwrapped for years, Loki." He lowered his mouth to Loki's again, cutting off the triumph laugh, kissing him lazily and wetly. His slid an arm beneath Loki, rolling them until Loki was laying over him. Loki chuckled, planting his hands on the mattress on either side of Tony's head.

"You enjoy me atop you, don't you, Anthony?" He bit into his bottom lip and ground himself into Tony.

Tony gasped softly, hardening almost instantly, gripping Loki's hips. "Ohh…yes. But that's not why I put you on top." His hands slid up Loki's back, dragging his nails back down, making Loki arch and purr, like a cat being scratched. Tony’s capable hands continued down, pushing Loki's thighs together and spreading his own to accommodate him. He got the reaction he wanted. Loki cocked a brow and pushed into him again, with a soft, growling grunt.

"Ooh…does my love feel like being on the receiving end this time around?" He leaned down, kissing Tony softly before he could respond, coaxing his lips apart slowly. By the time he pulled away, Tony was putty in his hands. He tried to speak, to say Loki's name as the man ducked out of his view, but all words, all thoughts; everything was lost in a dizzying haze when Loki rubbed a thumb over the sensitive tip of his cock, applying pressure to the slit. Tony's whole body twitched, and the noise he made was incredibly embarrassing, when he felt Loki's tongue drag infuriatingly slow from between his cheeks and up to his perineum.

"Loki…" he whined through his teeth. He would totally berate himself later for actually whining, like a bitch in heat.

"Patience, my love," Loki breathed against the back of Tony's thigh. Tony began to pant, loudly, as Loki's finger penetrated him, his hands clenching into the mussed sheets.

"I…Loki. I want you inside me.  _ Now _ ."

Loki rose above him again, his fingers still working to prepare him, his lips hovering over his. "You are  _ my _ birthday present, Anthony. And I plan to unwrap you  _ very  _ slowly."

* * *

The first thing Loki noticed when they pulled up to Natasha and Clint's house was that both of their cars were in the driveway. It was odd because the driveway was usually kept clear for the kids to play their various activities in, since they lived on a fairly quiet street that rarely had a lot of cars passing through. The second thing he noticed was how quiet it was. And he said as much to Tony when he joined him on the sidewalk.

"What do you mean it's too quiet?"

Loki cocked a brow. "They have a houseful of kids, ages twelve to six months. It is  _ never _ this tranquil, even when our kids are not there."

Tony just shook his head and laced his fingers with Loki's. "You're crazy. They're probably in the backyard or something. Come on." Loki followed Tony up the winding concrete path to the stone porch, and tugged on his husband's hand before he could reach for the knob of the screen door. "What?"

"Nothing..." Loki bit into his lip, pulling Tony closer so he could slide his arms around his neck. "I just wanted to thank you for today." He leaned into Tony when he let his hands rest at Loki's waistline, inside the new black leather jacket that he had gifted him with — after they had eventually untangled themselves from each other. It was probably a mistake; Tony said the jacket reminded him of the one Loki was wearing the first time they met at that Student Mixer, and therefore, turned him on beyond control. But, sadly, that was for later. Loki placed a soft kiss on his lips, feeling his husband's lips curve as he did.

"You're welcome, babe. It's not like I didn't have fun too."

"I know." He leaned in for another, longer kiss. "Let's make dinner short, hmm? I am anxious to get you home and in bed again."

"Babe," he started in a playfully warning tone. "Be fair. Don't get me wrong; I'll totally pound you into the mattress later if you want — or let you pound me. Whatever; it's your birthday. But the kids will want to spend their evening with you, too."

Loki pouted his lips, only half unhappy. "All right," he relented. "Just don't expect to sleep much tonight." He smiled and stole another kiss.

"Mm…I was hoping you'd say that," Tony responded huskily, bringing Loki down for yet another kiss.

"Anthony." He laughed against Tony's lips. "Do you want your children to find us this way; making out like a pair of hormonal teenagers on their aunt and uncle's front porch?"

"Considering I feel like a hormonal teenager…?"

Loki laughed again, as Tony pulled away to ring the doorbell. He paused, frowned, and chuckled. "Since when do we ring the doorbell?" He moved past Tony and pulled open the screen door before pushing open the heavier inside door. He heard Tony's quiet laugh, ignoring him, and stepped inside, frowning more at the quiet and darkness of the house. "Hello?"

Loki had barely reached the staircase at the end of the entryway when he got the fright of his life.

Suddenly, and from out of nowhere, people jumped up and out, shouting  _ "Surprise!" _ in unison. And three bodies barreled into him at once. Lights came up and noisemakers were blown into. Loki laughed and realized it was his children who had run to him, the three of them wrapped around him, Audrey clinging tightly to his right leg. He turned to look at Tony, who was smiling with the smugness of a mission accomplished.

"Happy birthday, babe."

Loki could feel his face growing warm, his eyes stinging a little, especially when he glanced around the room and spotted his brother, his mother, and even Steve and Peggy. He cupped each of his children's faces, Audrey the only one that still allowed him to kiss her cheeks, and braced himself for the people lining up to greet him and give them their wishes. He heard Tony behind him, joking with kids before chasing them away, and greeting their friends after they had finished with Loki. Tony, not surprisingly, disappeared from the receiving line after his old mentor Dr. Bruce Banner passed through. Steve gave him a hearty handshake and Peggy, beautiful as always, a tight embrace. Jane had barely placed a kiss on his cheek before she was running off after Erik, to make sure he ate or didn't break anything valuable. Loki smiled softly, fondly, as Thor stepped up to him then groaned when the blond grabbed him up in a tight hug.

"Thor! Stop it!" He wobbled a little after Thor set him down. "You know, you didn't have to come all this way."

"And miss my little brother turning forty? Oh, that right there!" He aimed a thick finger at Loki's dark face. "That little pout is exactly what I wanted to see." He chuckled and clapped a hand over Loki's shoulder. "I would not have missed your fortieth birthday for anything in the world, brother."

"Thank you," he responded begrudgingly. "But you can leave out the number. You're still older than me."

Thor, in his usual way, simply laughed. "'Tis just a number, brother! You're just catching up to Tony and me. And, look at you!" He cupped Loki's face between his hands, purposely squeezing his cheeks together. "You don't look a day over twenty..." He dipped his head. "…Plus twenty."

" _ Knulle deg _ ." His words were jumbled between his squished lips. Thor dropped his hands and spun around at a soft gasp.

"Do you kiss my grandchildren with that mouth?" Loki glared at Thor, working his jaw, before opening his arms to Frigga for a hug.

"Yes, Mother, but not when I'm saying those words."

Frigga chuckled. "Happy birthday, my love."

Thor laughed at Loki's face and patted his back, inadvertently shoving him into Frigga. "We shall speak later, brother. I must find Tony."

Loki watched him wander off with a faint smile that brightened when he looked down at his mother. He squeezed her shoulders, somehow still a little surprised at the wrinkles that fanned out around her eyes. She was still beautiful; one of the most beautiful women he had ever known, but something in him ached knowing she was in her twilight years and he didn't know how many years he had left with her. "You didn't have to leave the store, you know."

"And miss this?" She cupped his face between soft, slightly wrinkled hands. "I cannot believe that beautiful little green-eyed boy I took home over thirty years ago has turned forty today."

Loki blushed at the "beautiful little green-eyed boy" and gritted his teeth at yet another mention of his age. "Mother…"

Frigga dropped her hands to his, holding onto them tightly. "You let me fuss. You're still my baby."

Loki grinned softly, his heart melting at that, and perked up at a thought. "Has Sif spoken to you?"

She lifted her brows. "Well, we have spoken since I arrived, but was there something specific she was to tell me?"

His eyes flicked up as Frigga spoke, searching for Sif. When he spotted her, he aimed a finger at Frigga and mouthed a silent,  _ "Did you tell her?" _ Sif shook her head and motioned for him to do it. Loki took both of Frigga's hand again. "You're going to be a grandmother again."

Frigga's jaw dropped and she let out a short, delighted laugh. "Really?" Loki nodded and Frigga spun around, keeping a hold on one of Loki's hands, to look for Sif and beckoned her over. "Darling, that's wonderful to hear! Is it you or Tony?"

"Anthony." Loki's eyes grew wide when Frigga squealed and clasped a hand around her necklace, a gold chain with the birthstones of her six grandchildren dangling in order of birth from it, that Thor and Loki had given her for Mother's Day after Audrey was born.

Sif came sliding up to Loki, slipping an arm around his waist. "Happy birthday, love."

"Thank you, darling," he said, kissing her temple.

"You, come here!" Frigga held open her arms for Sif, pressing a light kiss to each of her cheeks and giving her shoulders quick squeeze. "Oh, bless you, darling, for doing this again. Have you gone in already?"

Sif nodded. "Yes. Just waiting now, but I'm already feeling some symptoms." They all looked toward the backyard when a shout of "Gamma!" was heard. Loki grinned because the only one who called Frigga that was Audrey.

"Let us talk more later, my dears. I made my little Audrey promise to tell me all about school." She absently blew them a kiss and made her way to Audrey.

Sif promptly turned to Loki. "So, birthday boy, how do you feel? Do you feel like an old man? Because you are an old man now?"

Loki fixed her with a very blank stare. "Be quiet,  _ Siflena _ . Ow," he jerked away when she pinched his side. "Stop it." She laughed and dropped her hands from him.

"Is the Stark household back to order now that Bash is back?"

"Yes," he nodded and smiled. "It's been very nice to have him close again. Thank you for being so helpful and backing us up."

"It takes a village, Loki." He laughed softly then settled an arm around her shoulders.

"How are you feeling, really?"

She groaned, placing her hands over her abdomen. "Bloated and fat and swollen. So, good, yes?" she said with another laugh. Loki laid a sympathetic hand against her cheek.

"If I could ease your aches, you know I would."

Sif patted his hand then removed it. "I know. I felt awful last night, but thankfully, Tony was a good sport about helping me." Loki went still then angled his head toward her.

"Helping you with…?"

"The food," she answered as if he knew. Loki felt a mixture of embarrassment and indignation at the realization of Tony's lie, but smiled down at Sif anyway.

"Right. Of course, the food," he mumbled.

Sif glanced around. "Hey, where is he? I need to talk to him."

Loki was lost in thought, concerned now about what other lies Tony may have told him, and slightly distracted, answered, "He's in the other room, probably talking shop with Dr. Banner. Thor wanted to speak to him as well, I think."

"Okay." She leaned up to kiss his cheek. "Happy birthday again, darling. Enjoy yourself. And…go talk to Natasha," she said, nudging him with her elbow. He eyed her intently. "She didn't tell me everything, but she gave me the gist of it. For the record, I think you both owe each other an apology."

"Sif…"

"Gotta run, bye!"

Loki watched her, contemplating what to do first: confront Tony about his lies or find Natasha and fix things between them. He spotted Clint, handing out a few beers to some friends from one hand, and holding baby Xander on his hip with the other. Another thought came to him, and he smirked to himself as he headed straight for his former roommate.

* * *

"Tony!" Thor bellowed, as he left his brother and mother, and joined Tony and Bash in the living room, just as Bruce was leaving to find a drink. Tony winced, turning from the video game he was playing with Bash to make a face at Thor.

"Thor, I'm right here, man. You don't have to yell."

"Dad...!" Bash shrieked, nudging him with his hand and knee to get his attention back on the game.

"I'm sorry!" Tony shouted, overly excited, as he returned his attention to the video game. Thor chuckled, lowered himself to sit on the armrest next to Tony, eyeing the television, displaying a Super Mario game Tony and Bash were teamed together against Matty and Rowan.

"Bah!" Matty shouted throwing up his arms, mimicking his father almost to a T. "No fair! Uncle Tony probably played this game in its beta version!"

"Hey!" Tony shouted back in protest as Thor laughed loudly and aimed a 'thumbs up' sign at his son. "Shut it, Odinson. Go, Bash, there! There —!"

"I got it! I got it!"

Thor watched them play for a bit, allowing them to nearly complete their match. "Tony, I have need to speak with you."

"Gimme a sec. Oh, shh…sugar!" All the boys were shouting to each other, moving with the characters on the screen, and nearly causing a ruckus.

"Tony," Thor said again. Tony's head whipped around to glance at his brother-in-law, causing his player to crash and die. He groaned loudly, along with Sebastian, and he looked up at Thor, holding out his arms, in a clear  _ What the fuck? _ gesture. "Apologies, my friend," he said with a sweet smile. They both turned their heads when Matty and Rowan cheered loudly, high-fiving each other.

"Sorry, Bash." Matt smiled at his cousin, with a smug grin. Sebastian scowled at tossed his controller to the table before him.

"I hate this game."

"Hey." Tony bumped his elbow to Sebastian's arm. "Show some respect; that's not your stuff." Sebastian rolled his eyes and nodded. "Anyway, how come you're not hanging out with Anna?" he asked in a low tone, but apparently not low enough. Sebastian's eyes widened briefly and travelled to Matty and Rowan, staring up at him with interest, then up to Thor before he finally looked at Tony.

"Um, ‘cause she's…she's mad at me," he muttered under his breath, jerking his head to shift his hair from his face. It didn't move very far.

"Why? What'd you do?"

Sebastian nibbled on his bottom lip. "I told her about that thing that happened…" Tony frowned. "At school…" Sebastian scoffed when Tony only shook his head. "With that boy," he said between his teeth.

"Oh! Wait, why is she mad?" Sebastian folded his lips in.

"Because she wasn't his first kiss," Matt answered for him on a teasing laugh. Sebastian's face darkened as he glared at his older cousin.

"Matthew," Thor said in warning. The boy flushed red and went quiet.

"Shut up, Matty. At least I've kissed somebody!" Tony tried to interject but was drowned out.

"I never said I haven't kissed anybody!"

"Oh?" Thor decided to play devil's advocate, and hopefully, bring the tension in the room down. "And just who have you been kissing, Matthew?"

Matty's eyes went wide and his cheeks grew even redder. "N…uh…" He looked at Sebastian then back to his father. "Nobody," he mumbled, lowering his head.

"See? I told you!"

"Hey, knock it off, both of you! This is not a competition. Jazz! Get over here!" Tony shouted out as he stood and moved from his spot on the sofa next to Bash. "And even if it was,  _ I _ would have all of you beat." Sebastian scoffed loudly, but smiled up at his dad.

"What about  _ my _ dad?"

Tony snickered at Matty's question and aimed a thumb at Thor. "Who? Him? Please. He was whipped before he knew what hit him."

"And gladly so, I'll have you know," Thor replied genially. "There were no other girls once I met your mother, son."

"Whipped," Tony muttered from behind his hand. He stumbled forward when Jazz came zooming into the room and straight into him.

"Dad, did you call me?" Tony handed him the controller he still held then ruffled his spiky brown hair. Poor kid was stuck with his height and his hair, Tony thought, but at least he had his intellect.

"Here, take my place."

"Aw, Dad, come on," Sebastian protested, sitting up straighter. "He can't play!"

"Hey," Jazz said back before sticking his tongue out at Sebastian, who simply rolled his eyes and turned away.

"Blame your uncle!" Tony lead Thor outside to the front porch, leaving behind the boys as they started to argue amongst themselves. "So, what's up, man?"

Thor crossed his arms over his chest and Tony was glad he was no longer intimidated by the giant blond. "I had a meeting with Agent Coulson this past week."

"I'm sorry." He laughed harder than he meant to at the un-amused look on Thor's face. "Okay, okay. Aside from my opinions about the company you keep, what about your meeting? Is he itching to come out here and raid my lab?"

Thor sighed through his nose, seemingly trying to hold on to his temper. "Tony, are you aware that, despite your moving to California some years ago, S.H.I.E.L.D. still keeps light tabs on you?"

"Light," he scoffed quietly. "Yeah, of course I knew that. I am still a consultant with them, you know. Why?"

Thor shifted a little, sighing softly, clearly uncomfortable. "I have been tasked with asking you what it is you are working on."

Tony's smile vanished, his head cocked to the side. He didn't think about that during all this stupid business with this stupid woman. He was so busy trying to keep it from Loki, he hadn't even thought about S.H.I.E.L.D. tracking his stuff. All he could think to say was, "What?"

Thor's lips curved in a faint smile as his brows lifted. "Director Fury has requested a full report from you." Tony noted how apologetic he sounded and sighed, reminding himself that Thor was only the messenger.

"There's nothing to report on." Thor started to speak, but Tony waved a hand to cut him off. "I will call Fury myself and explain. It's just some extra security precautions on the house and kids. I'm just testing out some new prototypes, that's it."

Thor, who had leaned back against the house as they spoke, straightened immediately. "For what are security precautions needed? Has something happened? Is everything all right with the children?"

Tony pushed his hands at him, gesturing for him to calm down. "Relax, big guy. Everyone's fine. It's just, just some stuff I'm testing out before I send it off to S.H.I.E.L.D."  _ Shit _ , he thought. Now he had to draw up schematics and come up with more security-type items to fool the top-secret government agency. This lying thing was getting away from him.

"Are you sure?" Thor asked, concern written all over his face. Tony glanced toward the door when his name was called, but quickly returned his attention to his overly worried brother-in-law, laying a hand on his massive arm.

"Positive." He grinned. "We're fine."

"Tony." He spun around as Sif popped out from inside the house. "Oh. Sorry. Looks like I'm interrupting something important."

Tony looked to Thor. "I don't know. Are there any other messages?" Thor sighed again, clearly not all that appeased with Tony's answers.

"No. But you would tell me, yes, Tony; if anything was wrong?"

_ No _ . "Absolutely, Thor, but, seriously, everything is peachy keen, okay? Relax. It's a party. Go bug Loki about turning forty. And grab a beer." He chuckled, listening to Tony and letting the tension in his shoulders ease a little.

"Aye, that does sound like a good plan. Would you care for one?"

"Nah, I want to be sober for later." He rolled his eyes when Sif and Thor both sent him questioning looks. "Tonight, when I'm alone with my husband," he explained. Sif scoffed and Thor laughed uncomfortably.

"And you, dear Sif? Would you care for a cold beer?"

"Oh. Um…" Sif's smile spread as she looked at Tony. He grinned back and motioned for her to continue. She turned that wide smile on Thor. "I can't partake." She patted her belly with both hands. Thor's bright eyes dropped to her hands and he gasped as he looked between the two of them.

"Am I to be an uncle again?"

Tony slid his arm around Sif's waist — because, damn it, she was wearing heels and he couldn't reach her shoulders — and she shrugged, leaning into him. "It seems likely."

"Wonderful! I'm happy for you both. I must congratulate my brother." He reached for Sif, grabbing her up in a tight hug, lifting her off of her feet before doing the same to Tony, planting a loud kiss to his cheek.

"Aw, god — Thor! Get off me!" Tony kicked and struggled against the brick wall of a man, shoving him back when he was on solid ground again. Thor's laughed echoed as he headed back into the house. Tony swiped a hand over his cheek, making a disgusted noise, but smiling as he leaned against a beam, and faced Sif. "How are you feeling, hon?"

"Like your evil spawn is eating my insides for dinner," she deadpanned.

Tony laughed heartily and they spoke briefly of when Sif's next appointment was. They were interrupted when Ana came tearing out of the house, the wrought iron screen door making a loud clang as she threw it open. Sebastian was close behind.

"Ana! Wait!"

The tiny redhead whirled around, yelling into Sebastian's face, "I  _ did! _ " She spotted Tony and Sif and turned a bright shade of scarlet. Confused, Sebastian turned to follow her gaze and he turned a dark red.

"Dad! Mama! Can we get some privacy please?"

Tony made a point of looking around the front yard, doing his best not to blatantly laugh in Sebastian's face. He placed a hand at Sif's back, urging her toward the door. "Fine, but try not to kill each other out here, okay? Take it to the backyard."

"What was that about?" Sif asked, once they were inside.

"Uh…apparently, she's mad because she wasn't Bash's first kiss."

"Yes, she was. When they were — oh, gods, three or four? Right before we left to go back to London, after Loki moved back to New York. She just walked right up to him and laid one on his lips. It was adorable."

He looked toward the door, hearing the two preteens yelling at each other, laughing because it looked like Loki and Natasha arguing. "Well. Let's not interrupt their lover's quarrel with that bit of information."

"Speaking of information…" Tony looked at Sif as her hazel eyes darted around the entryway. "Come with me for a moment." She crooked a finger at him then took his hand, dragging him into the hall before he could ask why. She pulled him into the nearest room, the one that was once Loki's room, then Rowan's, and now Natasha's home office.

"Whoa. Jeez, Sif, why didn't you just grab me by the hair and drag me in here? And why are you so freakishly strong?"

"Would you mind telling me what the hell this is?" Sif held a small item between her thumb and forefinger up to Tony's face. Tony jerked back, frowning at her hand before taking the object in his own hand.

"GPS chip. Why?" Sif's hands fell to her waist and Tony had to fight back a smile. She was so cute when she turned on the mother look.

"What the hell was that doing in my son's backpack?"

_ Getting sloppy, Stark _ . "Ah. Well. There is a perfectly good explanation for that." She snatched the chip back from him and cocked her brows.  _ What did I tell Loki again? _ Tony shrugged, nonchalantly, before answering just as casually, "It's for S.H.I.E.L.D. I'm just testing some new stuff out."

Sif didn't seem to be buying it. Her arms crossed under her breasts and she shot him that quintessential 'Mom' look; the one that said,  _ I know you're lying, but I'm going to let you think I don't, until it's convenient for me to throw it in your lying face. _ Not that Maria ever gave him that look. But Howie totally had it nailed. "On my child…?"

"Relax; Jazz and Audi have them, too. I needed to see how good it works on distance and movement. You know how clumsy those S.H.I.E.L.D. agents can be." She stared at him a little longer, unmoving, and a small part of him wondered if she was going to totally call bullshit.

"For S.H.I.E.L.D….?" He nodded. "Does Loki know about this?"

"Of course, yeah," he scoffed softly. "You think I could get that past him?"

Sif sighed and stuffed the chip back in her pocket. "Are you sure there isn't anything else going on?"

_ Shit, almost got away with it _ . "Positive." She eyed him shrewdly again. Damn, those hazel eyes were piercing. His daughter, who had the exact same colored eyes, was going to be a ball-buster when she grew up. Think, Stark, think. "Where's Sian?" Mentally, he pumped a fist in victory when Sif's face softened at the mention of her girlfriend.

"She'll be back in a bit. I can't drink any of the crap here, so she went to the store to get me some ginger ale."

"Are things cool now? Is she…okay with everything?"

Sif shrugged, the light dimming from her eyes a little. "I think she's accepted it. She's not angry anymore, really, but she's still struggling with understanding why, if I'm going to have a baby, it cannot be ours, hers and mine."

Tony's brows lowered. "I didn't know she wanted kids."

"Neither did I!" She laughed at her own outburst and Tony smiled. "I don't know. Maybe in a year, if we're still together…I'm still young enough, right?"

Tony cupped her cheek, pouting playfully, and drew her close to give her a quick hug. "Hey, women are having babies into their late forties these days. You're only thirty-five; you've got plenty of time. And you know Loki or I would be happy to help you out." He grinned and winked and she scoffed, shoving him back.

The door to the room pushed open and Clint ushered in a couple that Tony recognized from the few school events he had been able to attend, but for the life of him, couldn't remember their names. "This is Tasha's office, but — oh. Hey, guys. Did we interrupt?"

"No, we were just talking," Tony answered. He waved and smiled at the couple, who smiled politely back, and immediately he remembered them as a couple Loki didn't like. They weren't very polite to him and they had a son that wasn't very nice to Jazz. Clint quickly explained how they had changed the room's décor several times then ushered them back toward the door.

"Talk it over, get back to us," he said before returning to Tony and Sif after the couple were gone. "Are we having a secret meeting or something?"

Tony rolled his eyes. "There you go thinking you're a super secret spy again. What's going on?" He jutted his chin toward the door.

"We might be selling the place," Clint explained, slipping his hands into his pockets. "Fourth kid on the way, we don't really have enough room, so we're looking for a bigger house."

"Ah, shit," Tony muttered, rubbing his hand over the back of his neck. "We might need to start looking for a bigger place, too."

"Why?"

Tony and Sif turned to each other at the same time. She smiled and looked back at Clint. "It's highly likely that I'm having another one of Tony's devils." She giggled when he smacked a hand to her bare arm.

"Really…? That's awesome! You and Natasha pregnant at the same time," he said, excited at first, before frowning. "Great; it'll be a repeat of Ana and Bash."

Sif laughed and Tony shook his head. "Natasha didn't tell you?"

Clint made a small face. "If Loki told her about it, no; she's been really tight-lipped about him recently. Do you even know what happened between them? She just came home in a rage that day. And any time any of us brought up Loki, she got that crazy, 'I'm going to kill you with my bare hands' look."

Tony snickered and shrugged. "He wouldn't talk about it either. And he got a pretty creepy villain-y look about him, too, when she was mentioned." They both looked at Sif, who innocently looked away. Tony flicked his eyes toward Clint, who narrowed his sharp blue eyes at the woman.

"You know, don't you?

"Nope."

"Liar," Tony accused.

"Yep," she replied, smiling charmingly at him. "Ask them both later tonight. Maybe they'll be more willing to talk."

Tony clucked his tongue. "No way, man; my mouth will be otherwise occupied."

"Je-sus," Sif moaned and headed for the door.

Clint covered his face with a soft groan. "Why do you always have to take it there? Like it wasn't enough for me to see all of it twenty years ago?"

Tony laughed and followed them both out of the room. "Do you really expect anything less from me, Barton?"

"Yeah, decency," he answered, glowering at Tony.

"You're in for a heartbreak, kid." He reached out to clamp a hand on Clint's shoulder, but the one-time archer skittered away before he could.

"Don't touch me! I don't know where your hands have been."

Tony laughed again, a hard belly laugh, which he quickly cut off when Loki approached. "Hi, babe — hey. What the…Loki!"

Loki said nothing, only curled his fingers in the crook of Tony's elbow and began to haul him down the hallway, ignoring Tony's resistance. At the end of the hall, he pushed open a door and shoved Tony inside, following him in, and slammed the door behind him.

* * *

"May I hold my nephew?"

Clint cocked a brow at Loki and scoffed a little when Xander started leaning toward him, his little fingers curling at him. "Yeah, sure. And happy birthday, man."

Loki slipped his hands under Xander's arms, brushing his lips over the baby's chubby cheek as he settled him against his chest. He smelled of soap and baby powder and Loki's heart couldn't help but flutter at the thought of getting to experience a newborn all over again soon. "Thank you. And thank you also for offering your home for the party."

In his usual casual way, Clint simply shrugged. "Come on, Loke. It's you." Loki's eyes softened a little as he looked from Xander to Clint. He grinned at his old friend, pulling a clump of his hair from Xander's fingers before he could put it in his mouth. Clint shrugged again. "She's not the only one who calls you best friend."

"Why, Barton, are you getting sentimental in your old age?"

Clint laughed, making Loki smile because he so rarely did so, and he reached up to cover Xander's ears. "Fuck you. I'm only a year older than you." He dropped his hands, stepping back when Xander began to fuss, flailing at his father's hands. Loki chuckled and let his gaze wander, searching for a head of dark red hair. Spotting her in the kitchen, he sighed.

"How long had you known about the party?"

Clint turned to look at what he was looking at. "Just after Christmas."

"Damn." He jolted a little when Clint grabbed his shoulders, turned him toward the kitchen, and gave him a light shove. He smiled his thanks and approached quietly. Natasha hadn't seen him yet, busy getting the plastic utensils ready for everyone to start eating soon. He lifted Xander from his side, holding the baby up in front of his face, waiting for Natasha to notice him. He heard her gasp when she did and smiled hopefully at her frown, peeking from behind the baby. "Hello, friend."

"Hello," she said stiffly, turning away again.

"Natasha…"

"Sneaky, using my kid like that."

Loki chuckled, making a silly face at Xander as he turned him around again. "Not really. I was only hoping to keep you from ramming your fist into my jaw." She turned her head, setting those shrewd eyes on his.

"You think you holding him would stop me?" She shifted, facing him more, planting a hand at her hip. "I could deck you and grab my kid before you hit the ground."

Loki's lips parted in shock as Natasha went back to separating the spoons, forks, and knives. He chuckled softly, relaxing a little. "Frankly, I don't doubt that for a moment. Natasha. Must we go through the rigmarole of a heart to heart conversation and weepy apologies? Could we not skip to being friends again?"

Natasha stopped and faced him once more. "Loki, you've known me how long now? Have I  _ ever _ done the weepy girl thing?"

"There is a first time for everything." A slim black brow cocked, pale red lips curved, and one long arm stretched out toward her. Loki saw those big, mossy green eyes glisten just a touch before Natasha stepped forward and wrapped her arms around him. Loki cupped a hand in her hair and pressed his lips to the crown of her head. They only broke apart when Xander shrieked at being caught in the middle and tried to kick out his legs. "Oh, I'm so sorry, Alexander."

Natasha pulled back, sniffling a little. "Don't act like you don't like to snuggle, mister," she said, digging her fingers into her son's belly, making him giggle and squirm. Loki cupped her cheek, drawing her gaze up to his.

"How are you feeling, darling?" He glanced down at the small bump, peeking out from under her loose sweater.

"Not bad," she answered, stepping back so he had to drop his hand. "Morning sickness didn't last too long. I'm craving a lot of BBQ though, which is very weird." Loki nodded, rocking Xander a little when he started to fuss. "Sif says she thinks the insemination took."

"Yes, hopefully," he said with a smile and handed a noisemaker to Xander. "Another pair of children close in age, hmm?"

Natasha plucked the noisemaker from Xander's hand. He whined and looked to Loki with a trembling lip. "No. I don't need that headache."

"I was only aiming to keep him entertained while we spoke."

"Uh-huh. Driving me crazy is not the way to do it." She chuckled when Xander clamped a hand over Loki's bottom row of teeth. He laughed and slowly tore his hand away before kissing it lightly.

"You don't drive Mama crazy, do you, Alexander?" He played with Xander for a moment, tickling him, and watching his eyes go wide when he looked up at Loki's face.

"Were you surprised?" Natasha asked after watching them for a moment.

"By the party…? Yes," he answered on a chuckle.

"Do you still think he's cheating?"

Loki paused. He should have known better than to think Natasha would forget that easily, or at all. He sighed and looked at her, almost pleading with his eyes for her to let the subject go. "Natasha…"

She threw up a hand and his teeth clamped together. "Let me just tell you something, because as big of an egotistical ass as Tony Stark is, he's not going to brag about this. Do you see this, all of this?" She swept her hand around, encompassing the kitchen and living room as one entity. "He did this for  _ you _ . By himself," she emphasized. Loki's brows lowered as she continued. "He wouldn't let anybody else help — not me, not Sif; not even Pepper. Except for the food, which Sif made, Tony planned this whole thing alone. He called every single person here and invited them personally — well, almost everybody. Clint and I had to step in on some of the school parents. But still; he did the shopping for everything. He put all of this together for you, Loki. So, all those times you thought he might be out banging his secretary…?"

Loki rolled his eyes up to the ceiling, only slightly irked that someone might hear that.

"He was planning this. For you." She poked a finger to the center of his chest, just to drive the point home.

"You've made your point, darling." He stiffened a little, his hand tightening on Xander's rump, when Natasha took a step forward, her eyes boring into his.

"Good. Don't you  _ ever _ ask me again if he's cheating on you, do you hear me?"

Loki wrapped a hand around her arm, squeezing lightly. "Natasha. You were right." He grinned when her chin jutted up.

"Say it again."

He smiled, laughed, and lifted Xander, adjusting him against his side when he started to slip. "You were right. I was…paranoid and he has clearly shown me that I was wrong to think that of him."

Natasha crossed her arms and nodded firmly once. "Good."

"And…?"

Her eyes narrowed slightly before she finally relented. "And. I'm sorry that I upset you, Loki. But I do not apologize for how I feel or what I said."

He watched her quietly for a moment, studying the stubborn set of her jaw and unrelenting stare. "I suppose that is as good an apology as I am going to get."

"Yep." She took one more step forward and drew Xander into her arms. Loki started to speak, but she was quick to cut him off. "Go find your husband and thank him."

"Ehehe…what?"

Like the skilled mother she was, Natasha easily moved a deep tray filled with the plastic utensils to the table, balancing Xander on one hip. "You heard me." She paused long enough to give him a pointed look. "Go find Tony. And thank him in the way that he likes best." Her lips curved in a very self-satisfied grin.

Loki's eyes flicked up, just as Sif, Clint, and Tony exited Natasha's office. "Perhaps you're right."

Natasha's smile grew a little wider. "My bathroom is the only room in the house with a working lock."

Loki's tongue poked out, gliding along his bottom lip, and he leaned forward to absently press a kiss to Natasha's forehead. "Thank you, darling." The words tumbled from his lips as he skirted the counter the stove was set into and made a beeline for Tony.


	10. Loki Says Thank You, Tony Gets Summoned

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki’s thank you for his birthday party is a pleasant surprise for Tony. A break-in at the house, in the middle of the night, shakes up the Stark household; especially Tony, who is robbed of some very important hardware. Later, he gets an earful from Coulson about his bad attempt at trying to control his blackmailer. And Thor shows up with some heartbreaking news.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the official warning: minor character death. :(

For a moment, Tony panicked.

He wondered if Thor had mentioned S.H.I.E.L.D.'s interest in his extra security work on the house to Loki. His husband wasn't the biggest fan of the agency; not since they had recklessly put Sebastian's life in danger on that horrible day, eight years ago. Loki appreciated their want and need for Tony's assistance and brilliance. But he didn't have to like it.

Or maybe, just maybe, Tony's lies had finally caught up with him.

Loki forced Tony into Clint and Natasha's bedroom, and for the briefest of seconds, Tony contemplated just confessing everything. But then Loki was shoving him into the bathroom and he was tumbling toward a towel rack and a wall.

"Babe," Tony started, straightening himself and facing his husband again. "I can ex —" He went still when Loki planted his mouth on his. Later, he would kick himself for taking much too long to respond, but he finally did, parting his lips to allow Loki's insistent tongue to pass through and slipping his hands over narrow hips to clench into worn denim over Loki's ass. "Mmm…"

"I concur," Loki murmured against his lips.

Tony chuckled anxiously, his eyes opening then dropping when he felt Loki's fingers brush against his stomach as he worked open his pants. "Ha, Loki...what are you —" Loki silenced him with his mouth again, maneuvering Tony to the low-set sink counter, slipping a hand inside his boxer-briefs when the backs of his thighs bumped into it. "Mm. Loki. What if? Someone. Walks in?" Tony questioned between kisses.

He wondered what it was that was making Loki so aggressive — and at his own party, no less — but his curiosity vanished, and he decided to just enjoy the ride, when Loki's thumb swiped across the sensitive head of his cock, and he moaned wantonly against Loki’s mouth. Still rubbing a palm along Tony's hardening length, Loki leaned away to click the lock on the bathroom door. Straightening again, he resumed his slow kissing; his mouth practically making love to Tony's, as his hand moved a little faster, a little rougher, in Tony's pants. "Unh, Loki…" Tony leaned back on the counter, trying to maintain his balance between the weird angle of his body and the pressure of Loki's body pressed up against his. His eyes cracked open, barely, at the touch of fingertips to his lips, before closing tightly again.

"Darling…"

"Hnh?"

Loki chuckled and started to shove at Tony's pants and boxers, keeping a fingertip running across his bottom lip. "Open your eyes, my love."

Tony's head rolled from side to side, his breath coming fast and short. "I…not while…oh, fuck, Loki…I want more!"

"Shh, shh, shh…can you be quiet, Anthony?" he whispered just beside Tony's ear, flicking his tongue out to trace the shell, his hot breath sending a sharp shiver through Tony. Tony tried to speak, to respond, but all that came out were incoherent stutters, mindless babbling, and pleading whines.

How did Loki reduce him to this quivering mess so quickly and so easily? God, he was such a slut.

Tony felt the cool air in the bathroom hit his skin once Loki got his pants and boxers down around his ankles. The counter was cold against his bare ass when Loki nudged him back to sit, keeping a steady stroke going on his cock. But Tony still needed more, always more, until that need, that ache, that hunger for Loki's touch was satisfied. He bucked his hips up only once before Loki's long-fingered hand was pressing him down again. "Baby…please…"

"Shh…" Loki pecked his lips softly, sweetly. "Mind your volume, love."

"Loki, I need you — oh!" Tony's head banged against the edge of the wall he leaned back against when his cock was enveloped in the wet heat of Loki's mouth. His chest heaved with each of his heavy breaths, the muscles in his thighs tightened with each rise and fall of Loki's mouth. "Ah, fuck, Loki! Shit, baby…so good. Oh…so good."

Loki's pace didn't stop or stutter as he reached up to press his fingers to Tony's lips, tapping once, effectively telling him to keep quiet. Tony bit his lip in an effort to do so, once Loki dropped his hand back to his bare thigh, grunting harshly once, as those hands spread his legs more. Loki's head began to bob a little faster and Tony's senses took another hit when skillful fingers massaged his balls, slipped down to rub against his perineum, taunting him, before moving further to tease his hole. Without thinking about it, Tony shifted, tilting his hips up so Loki had better access. He glanced down when Loki pulled away, the sound of an obscene slurp echoing in the room.

"You wish for more?" he asked, lips red and swollen, saliva and some pre-cum spread liberally around his mouth and chin. Tony didn't bother trying to speak; instead, he reached between his immodestly spread legs, searching for Loki's wrist, his fingers sliding down to Loki's and insistently pressing them between his cheeks. He grunted softly, his eyes drifting closed once one of Loki's fingers breached his entrance. He opened his eyes again when Loki took his hand away, and watched, his mouth going dry, his fully erect cock twitching, as Loki slicked up his own finger and returned it to its rightful spot between Tony's legs. All the while his heated gaze stayed locked on Tony's.

Tony’s body, already aching from their morning and afternoon workouts, broke out in a sweat, his muscles tensing and relaxing as Loki's finger started to work him, to stretch him. The burn of it felt good and Tony reached down to grab his cock, but Loki was quick to stop him, brushing his hand away, taking him in his free hand himself. Keeping his eyes locked on Tony's, Loki's tongue slipped out to lick around the head before his lips wrapped around it and sucked. Like it was a goddamned lollipop, Tony thought with a curse.

The sound Tony made was odd, even to his own ears; a gasp merged with a whine. A fist between his teeth kept it from escaping too loudly and he continued to bite down on it as Loki dove in for the kill. His mouth worked Tony's cock, as if he was a well-schooled whore; his finger moved into him like a jackhammer, before he added a second, and had Tony ready to scream, squirming on the counter until, finally, all the heat building up inside him found its outlet, and had stars and bright white lights bursting behind his eyelids.

Loki eagerly swallowed down every drop, keeping Tony in his mouth until he had softened and simply slipped out from between his lips. Tony was panting, slumped against the wall uncomfortably, when Loki curled his hands in his shirt, yanked him up, and pressed his lips to his. A surge of sudden energy had Tony straightening, taking Loki's face between his hands and kissing him back, passionately, humming in pleasure when he tasted himself on his tongue. Tony slowed at the cool palm against his heated cheek.

"We should get back to the party," Loki murmured with a soft chuckle.

"How the hell do you expect me to go out there and socialize with our friends after you've made a mess out of me?" Tony sighed softly, sated and content, when Loki wrapped his arms around his torso and nuzzled his nose into his throat. "Babe, what the hell was that for?"

Loki gave him a squeeze and leaned back enough to look up at him. "I simply wanted to show you how much I love and appreciate you." Tony grinned, a sliver of relief spreading through him, and lowered his mouth to Loki's again. He had barely slipped him a little tongue before Loki was pulling away again. "No, no, no. We must return to our guests. Come. Pull your pants on." He helped Tony to his feet then moved to the sink to wash his hands and rinse his mouth.

Tony obeyed, albeit unwillingly, moving slowly, more from some soreness than anything. They hadn't had sex more than once in a day like this since the New Year's trip to Monte Carlo. It took a lot of his energy. Once his pants were up and buckled again, he moved behind Loki as his husband was bent over the sink, swishing water in his mouth, sliding his hands along the man's narrow hips. "Are you sure you don't need attending to?" he asked, pressing himself against Loki's ass.

Loki laughed and straightened to dry his hands on the hand towel and rubbed it over his mouth. He spun around, tapping a finger to Tony's nose. "Later, Anthony. Dinner will be served soon, knowing Natasha and the tight schedule she keeps."

Tony growled and buried his face in Loki's neck, drawing his hips up against his. "I want Loki for my dinner."

Loki's laugh easily melted into a moan as Tony nibbled on his skin. "You had me for breakfast. And lunch. And you shall have me for dessert." He caught Tony's wrist before has hand could dip between his legs. "Later," he repeated, punctuating it with a short, sweet kiss.

_ "Daddy?" _

They both went still, yet didn't separate, at Audrey's muffled voice on the other side of the door, sounding a little forlorn. "Huh. I guess it's not just Thor's voice that kills my boner."

"Anthony," Loki scolded him, adding a light punch to the gut. "Wash your hands," he said pulling away once more. "Audrey? Are you all right?" Loki moved away from Tony and to the door, pulling it open.

" _ Pappa _ …" Audrey raised her arms to him, her bottom lip pushed out. "I don't feel good." Loki lifted her up and set her on her bottom on the counter, cupping her face, his fingers dropping down to her throat, checking to see if her tonsils were swollen.

"What's wrong? What hurts?" He pressed his hand to her forehead then slipped it under her thick black hair at the back of her neck. "I don't feel a fever."

"My tummy hurts."

Tony finished drying his hands on the towel then set the backs of his fingers to Audrey's forehead. Loki was right; she was running a normal temperature. "What did you eat?"

Audrey's eyes lifted to him first then to Loki. "Nothing," she answered, barely moving her lips, but her eyes moved between them, set almost defiantly.

"Well, maybe that's your problem, Monkey," he responded, chucking the tip of her nose with his finger.

"No," Loki nearly hummed; bending so his eyes were level with Audrey's. "I think that is not it. Look me in the eye and tell me the truth. What have you eaten?" Audrey's little lips pursed into a tight pout — which was when Tony saw what Loki must have spotted first. Playing along, he crossed his arms, his face adopting his "stern dad" look. But Audrey didn't take her eyes from Loki. Father and daughter in an intense stare off. "I will not ask you again, young lady. What have you eaten?"

The hard-headed little girl held on for almost half a minute before scoffing loudly. "Fine! I ate candy." Loki straightened, shaking his head disapprovingly. Tony tried not to laugh.

"How much did you eat?"

Her shoulders rose and fell. "I dunno."

"Did you eat  _ any  _ actual food?" Tony asked, lowering to the counter beside her.

"No. I'm sorry," she whined and threw her body against Tony's, slumping against him. "Daddy…! My tummy hurts!"

"Well, that's what you get when you eat a bunch of sugar, Monkey." He tapped his thumb to his tongue then touched it to the corner of her mouth, swiping away a patch of pink powder. He licked it off, smacking his lips. "What was that? Fun Dip?"

Audrey whined again, sitting up and clutching her arms around her middle, calling for Loki again because Tony wasn't doing anything to help her. "I hurt."

"Unfortunately, I cannot do much about that right now, my sweet. But we'll get you some water, all right? And flush all of that sugar out of your system." He ran a hand over her hair, frowning at the sudden dampness of her forehead, as Tony rose to stand again. Audrey groaned more, leaning into his hand. "Oh, no…Anthony, lift the toilet lid."

"What?" He tensed when Loki snatched Audrey up from the sink.

"The toilet lid!"

Tony realized what was happening and practically leapt to the toilet, lifting the lid just as Audrey started to throw up. He jumped back as some of it splashed off the lip of the bowl onto the tiled floor around the toilet. Loki knelt beside Audrey, paying no heed if he was in the vomit or not, twisting her dark waves around his hand, holding it back, and keeping his other arm around her as she moaned unhappily and started to cry.

" _ Pappa _ …" she moaned.

"I know, my darling. Anthony, would you get her some water, please?" Tony watched him, losing another little piece of his heart to this man, as he sat Audrey up and cleaned her mouth with a scrap of toilet paper. "Do you feel better?" he asked their little girl, rubbing his palm softly over her belly. She nodded and sniffled, her tiny face shiny and a sickly yellow. Loki chuckled because she looked so miserable and drew her against his chest. "Oh, my poor sweet little girl," he murmured, cupping a hand to the back of her head and cradling her in his arms. "Anthony?"

"What? Yeah, I'm going. I'll grab some paper towels, too, to clean this up. Should I get the boys together and ready to go?"

"No, no." Loki grunted a little as he settled more comfortably against the wall, settling Audrey on his lap. She groaned miserably as he moved her, her fingers tightening against his shirt until he stopped, and she went slack against him. "She'll be fine in a little bit. Some food and some water should get her back to her old self. Would you ask Natasha for some Children's Tylenol while you're at it?"

"Yeah, of course, I will, babe. Hey." Tony fell to a knee beside Loki's legs to get in Audrey's eyesight. "Next time, come share some with me. Maybe you won't get so sick." He nudged her cheek with his fingers, much like he had done to Loki's earlier that morning. Both of them laughed again when Audrey pouted, whined loudly, and turned her face into Loki's chest. Before he straightened, Tony leaned forward a pressed a light kiss to Loki's lips and whispered, "Love you, baby."

Loki smiled, mouthed, "I love you." But the moment was sufficiently lost when Audrey moaned for Loki again and started toward the toilet. Tony left the bathroom, thinking that possibly the worst sound in the world was that of his daughter crying and vomiting at the same time.

Eventually, Loki emerged from the bathroom with Audrey, but had to enjoy the rest of the party with her sleeping in his arms, unwilling to lay her down in any of the Barton kids' rooms, in case she woke up still not feeling well. Thankfully, she slept the rest of the night, and Tony still got his Loki for dessert.

* * *

 

"Jarvis?!"

Tony shouted to the A.I. as he jerked awake, rolling and falling off the bed as he did. They had all just been violently awakened by the loud alarm screeching through the house and Tony shouted at Jarvis again, telling him to shut it off.

_ "There has been a break in, sir." _

"Yeah, no shit!"

_ "The police are on their way; estimated time arrival: five minutes and forty-three seconds." _

"Anthony? What's happening?" Loki was rushing to get his long legs into his pajama pants, which had been discarded only a few hours ago. The alarm finally stopped and he could hear Jazz and Bash outside the door, shouting for them. "Boys, quiet! We're coming!"

Tony finally jumped up, freeing himself from the sheet he had gotten tangled up in when he rolled off the bed. "Where did they break in, Jarvis?"

_ "The culprit entered through the kitchen and has made his way into the basement." _

"Basement? Shit."

"Anthony, wait." Loki called after him.

"I gotta get downstairs, Loki." He headed for the door, stopping when Loki pushed his weight against it. "Loki! Move!"

"Put your pants on first, Anthony! The children have already had a scare tonight," he said shoving Tony's pants into his chest.

Tony scoffed, frowning, and quickly stepped into the dark gray cotton pants. "When I have more time, I'm going to get you back for that."

"I'm sure you will," he muttered with a grin, opening the door after pulling a shirt over his head and once Tony was properly covered. Audrey reached him first, leaping into his arms and tightly wrapping her arms and legs around him. "Oh! My sweet girl, it's all right."

" _ Pappa _ , what was that?" Jazz asked coming to his side and pulling Loki’s arm down from around Audrey to slip his hand in his, gripping onto it like a lifeline. Loki twisted his arm away and gathered him close, cupping his face from the side.

"It was the alarm, darling. Someone has broken in, but don't worry. I'm sure that alarm has scared whomever it was off. It certainly shaved a few years off our lives, didn't it?" He smiled down at his son, pinching his cheek playfully, making sure he kept the smile on his face.

Tony had rushed past them toward the stairs, pausing when Bash approached him. "Dad, what happened? Let me come with you." He started to follow Tony and Tony pushed a hand to his chest to keep him back.

"No, someone broke into the house and I don't know if they're still here or not. Stay up here with your father." Tony moved him further back to stand with Loki and the other two kids. But Bash stubbornly followed him back to the stairs.

"But, Dad —"

"Damn it, Bash, just listen to me!" He shouted, forcing Bash to jerk to a stop. "Stay up here with your father until I tell you it's okay to come downstairs."

Tony turned away, flying down the stairs before he could see the hurt creep into Sebastian's eyes. As he reached the bottom level, he could hear the whistle of the cool spring breeze coming from what he assumed was likely a broken window in the kitchen. But he needed to assess the damage in the lab before he checked the kitchen.

"Jarvis," he whispered, as he crept closer to the door leading down into the basement. "Are they still in there?"

_ "No, sir; the burglar escaped one minute and seven seconds ago." _

Tony relaxed a little and picked up his pace, descending down the steps. A mixture of relief and disappointment coursed through him as he stepped into his lab, focused eyes darting around the room to see if anything was missing, as he headed for his main worktable. His whole body went ice cold when he spotted the note propped up on his keyboard, his name scrawled across it in very familiar writing. "Jarvis…is there anything missing?"

_ "Yes, sir," _ the A.I. answered, making Tony clench his jaw tightly.  _ "It seems your backup reactor sources have been taken." _ With a huff, Tony ripped open the note, quickly scanned it and tossed it down again.

Whoever broke in was likely a flunky for "M," or maybe it was the bitch herself. And now she had in her slippery little hands, the two arc reactors he kept, in case anything ever happened to the one in his chest. It was simply for safety measures, but, in the wrong hands, like "M's"… Tony didn't want to think about it; not yet at least. And now it appeared she was holding them for ransom. Five million dollars,  _ each _ , to get them back.

_ Fuck. _

"Anthony?" Deftly, Tony slid the note into the pocket of his sweatpants as he spun around to find Loki, still cradling Audrey in his arms, just reaching the bottom step. "Is everything all right down here?"

Tony watched Loki's hand move in comforting circles over Audrey's back for a moment. The little girl's sniffles were barely audible and a stuffed bunny was clutched tightly under one of her arms. His stomach turned a little at the thought of telling Loki another lie. "Yeah, it's fine; nothing amiss," he answered, stepping closer. "I thought I told you to wait upstairs." He grinned a little so Loki knew he wasn't all that upset.

Loki smirked softly. "Your son is impatient. He asked Jarvis himself if it was safe."

"J, you traitor," he muttered, sending up a mock-frown.

_ "My apologies, sir." _

Tony took another step forward and laid a hand over Loki's on Audrey's back. "Is the Monkey okay? The boys all right?"

"The boys are just fine. They went to investigate the kitchen. Don't worry; I told them not to touch anything." Loki leaned his head back, pushing his shoulder forward so Audrey would lift her head. "Are you all right, love?"

Audrey nodded, sniffled, and upon spotting Tony, held out her arms for him, mumbling a soft, "Daddy." He smiled softly and took her from Loki's arms. "Hey, Monkey, there's nothing to be scared of. Daddy's got you."

Loki smiled softly and ran his hand over Audrey's hair. "Are you sure they didn't take anything? Why would they come in here if they weren't after something? Your work — it's all locked up, correct?"

If his entire life wasn't hanging on the precipice of ruin at the moment, Tony might have been impressed. Loki was far too intelligent for his own good sometimes — like everyone else in this family. "Yeah, everything's locked up tight. I'll have Jarvis do a more thorough inspection right now. The cops are gonna be here any second, babe, so let's get upstairs."

Tony urged Loki up the steps, glancing back at his lab once, his mind working to figure out how to get rid of this damn woman once and for all. If he were a lesser man or if he were still the self-centered prick he had been twenty years ago, before Loki, Tony might have blamed his husband for everything. If they hadn't been fighting so much, if he hadn't been so stressed out, and Loki hadn't accused him of having an affair, he wouldn't have left so angry and hurt, and he wouldn't have gotten himself so carelessly wasted.

But, damn it, Tony was older and wiser now; an old hand at taking responsibility for his actions — particularly since becoming a father. This was entirely his own fault; he couldn't blame anyone else. He cursed himself for falling back into old habits; blacking out and tumbling into a stranger's bed. He still felt, deep in his heart, that he and "M" hadn't laid a finger, or any other body part, on one another. Drunk or not, Tony Stark  _ always  _ remembered his own performances, even if he didn't remember the partner. Except for Loki, of course.

Tony pushed it all to the back of his mind, for now, gathering the boys from the kitchen, eyeing the damage in the room. Like he had predicted, there was broken glass spread around the door leading to the back yard and, curiously, a large, muddy boot print just inside the door, proving that it was definitely a man who had entered their home. A few minutes later, the police arrived and Tony spent the next few hours with a trembling child in his lap, because she refused to leave his arms, while her brothers sat quietly between him and Loki, listening as he repeated the same information to several different officers. A cup of coffee was on the table in front of him that Loki dutifully kept refilling through the night.

Eventually, Loki carried Jazz and Audrey upstairs, back to their beds, forced Bash to go with them, and returned to Tony's side. Why it had taken so long for the police to get down the information, neither of them understood. It was the first time he could recall wishing S.H.I.E.L.D. was there to take care of things. If they did anything right, it was paperwork.

Where was Phil Coulson when Tony really needed him?

* * *

Coulson, it turned out, was closer than Tony thought. It wasn't but hours after the police left, and he and Loki had finally dragged themselves back to bed, that he received the call. S.H.I.E.L.D. had gotten wind of the break-in and he was being summoned to headquarters. Loki wasn't very ecstatic to hear the news, and he even asked to come along, offering up a short, quick getaway at their old home in Stark Tower for the two of them — or longer if Tony wanted. But Tony turned him down; he had to. He didn't want to risk the chance of Loki finding something out while they were in New York. And he would only be gone a day or two, at the most; he promised he would definitely be back in time for Loki to spoil him for his own birthday in a week.

His forty-third. Jesus, when did he get so old? He asked this silently to himself as he studied his reflection in the mirror of the StarkJet's commode. He had a lot more gray hairs than Loki, on his head and in his beard — and some were cropping up in places he would rather not think about at the moment. Deep-set lines fanned his eyes when he smiled and maybe he was carrying a little extra baggage under those wise old eyes. Still…he looked good for his age. And aside from that blunder all those months ago, he didn't drink much anymore — not that Loki let him keep much alcohol in the house at any given time. A six pack here, a bottle of Jack stashed there. But looking back on it all, Tony thought he had lived a much better life than he ever thought he would have.

Considering he was so miserable for the first good twenty years of it, and pretty positive the next twenty wasn't going to be much better, at least by the standard Howard had set, he had to give credit where credit was due. Loki had quite literally been the bright shining light of his life. He gave Tony a reason to smile, to laugh…to  _ live _ . Without him, Tony would have been just another rich corporate man, living the high life, sleeping with a different girl every night, or maybe have an ex-wife or two. He wouldn't have his kids, his babies, those little monsters that stressed him out to the max, but made everything so much more fun. He wouldn't have known he was capable of so much; of being a better dad than his was to him; of being an understanding and tolerant boss. Of being a loving and loyal husband. Sort of.

Tony dropped his eyes from his reflection; that annoying, prickling, needling feeling he called guilt, piercing him straight in the heart. Some husband he was. He had been lying to his husband for nearly six months now. About what, he still wasn't sure. It had been bothering him for so long, he was accustomed to the twist of guilt in his stomach, the ache in his heart when Loki believed another one of his treacherous lies. With the summons from S.H.I.E.L.D., he only expected things to get worse.

* * *

"Why didn't you inform us someone was trying to blackmail you right away?"

Tony stared straight ahead, feeling very much like the troublesome kid who had been sent to the principal's office for mouthing off to the teacher. He shrugged guiltily in response.

"Did you do some investigating as to who this woman is? Have you come up with anything?"

Tony lifted his head then, eyeing Agent Coulson shrewdly. He remembered telling the man, years ago when he was the dorm's RA, that he should've been an FBI agent. S.H.I.E.L.D. was very similar, but Tony couldn't help regretting that suggestion the tiniest bit at the moment. The man had entirely too much power over him. "Have  _ you? _ "

Coulson's lips barely twitched, rising just a little on each side. "Not as yet, Mr. Stark."

Tony’s rolled his eyes heavily away. "Knock it off, Phil. I know you and Fury just love making me feel like a giant ass, but do you think we could skip over that for the time being? I'd really like to get back to my family."

Coulson cleared his throat and reached for a brown file sitting on his desk, holding it open in his lap, as he perched on the edge of his desk, directly in front of Tony. "So far, our efforts have led us to numerous dead ends, but we're still looking into some things. Whoever 'M' is, she's very good at hiding herself."

"Yeah, no shit, Sherlock."

Coulson's sly blue eyes met Tony's antagonistic gaze. "You could have come to us for help, Tony. The fact that you didn't…? Well. That's hurtful." Tony looked away again, his lips curving ever so slightly. "But, we do have some good news for you." Coulson handed over the open file.

Tony took it, knowing full well they had nothing more on 'M' than he had. But instead of reading over information he had already discovered, he found something new. His brows furrowed as his eyes scanned a S.H.I.E.L.D. incident report, and clipped into the top left corner, was what looked like a mug shot of a shady looking man. "What the hell is this?"

"Not what, Stark. Who?" The agent tapped a finger to the file Tony was still studying. The man's rap sheet was as long as his arm. Theft, assault, short jail stints for minor drug possessions, kidnapping and rape charges that had all been dismissed, and several restraining orders had been taken out against him, mostly from women.

"Who it looks like is a bad character on an episode of  _ Law & Order _ . Who is this guy?" Tony tossed the file back onto Coulson's desk and it landed with a plop.

"That, Stark, is Victor Morgan. But he's better known on the streets by the name Skurge. And he's the man who broke into your house." The agent's expression creased into one of concerned sympathy when the color drained from Tony's face.

"Are you shitting me? You're telling me…that  _ that _ guy was in  _ my _ house…where my kids were?!" Coulson straightened when Tony shot up from the comfy leather chair.

"Stark, relax."

" _ Relax? _ My kids were just feet away from that sick son of a bitch, Coulson! Who the hell is he?"

Coulson had to physically move Tony back into his chair, and quickly called for someone to bring him something to drink. "Calm down, Tony. The good news is we've got him. He's being held in a cell he will never be able to break out of. That is, unless he has some super powers. And I highly doubt that."

Tony gulped down the water Coulson's secretary had brought in for him, and asked for something a little stronger. He didn't see her look to Coulson with a questioning look or the agent's nod of approval. "So, what's the bad news?"

Coulson crosses his arms over his chest, resettling on the desk. "What do you mean?"

Tony sighed, shaking his head. "I swear to god, you people forget the fact that I am a goddamn genius. Your stupid little evasive tactics that might work on your Average Joe aren't going to work on me. Now, tell me, what is the fucking bad news?!"

Coulson's eyes flicked up when his secretary stepped foot in the room again, and froze at Tony's outburst. He waved her in and took the two glasses filled with amber liquid from the tray she carried and urged her to leave. He handed one to Tony and kept the other by his side. Tony swallowed down half the drink before he had to stop and let the hot streaking burn going down his throat dissipate.

"What's the bad news, Phil?"

Coulson paused, waited for Tony to calm a little more. "He won't talk." When Tony brought the glass of what he deemed was scotch to his mouth again, his hand was slightly trembling. "We don't know if he's connected to 'M' in any way. Or if he's working for somebody else. But what we do know is that he was sent specifically to get your reactor sources. And, by the time we got to him, he had already delivered them to his contact."

Dread settled heavily in Tony's stomach, mixing with the scotch, and had a wave of nausea washing over him. "He's working for 'M.'"

"How do you know that?"

Tony set the empty glass on Coulson's desk and stood to wander aimlessly around his sparse office. "Because he left a note from her on one of my worktables." Coulson was frowning when Tony turned back to face him.

"The police didn't find a note. What did you do with it?"

"I have it; it's stashed somewhere safe."  _ With the others _ , he added silently to himself. "She wants five mil. For each one."

"And if you don't pay?"

"She sells them to the highest bidder." The room went quiet, deathly so, with Coulson contemplating in his spot at the edge of his desk, and Tony leaning back against the wall across from him.

"Do you plan on paying the ransom?" Coulson finally asked into the silence. Tony's shoulders jerked up and he laughed joylessly.

"What choice do I have, Phil? Not only could she potentially get more than five million each for the reactors, but depending on who she sells them to, you guys would have a lot more to worry about than the stupid shit that I do."

Coulson inhaled deeply, letting out the breath slowly as he ran a hand over his face. Tony was a little stricken at seeing the man as shaken as he appeared to be. In all the years he had known him, he seemed to be such a tight ass and always so together. "So what's the plan here? You have to let us help now," he said quite forcefully when Tony shook his head.

His face grew shades darker, his expression harder. "Why?"

"Because this isn't just about you cheating on your husband anymore, Tony. Now, it’s is about national security. You've allowed precious material to be taken from you; technology that, in the wrong hands, could set off World War III. You have to let us take over the investigation into who 'M' is and why she's after what you've got."

Tony's shoulders drooped further and further the longer Coulson berated him. What was he thinking? He thought a could handle this all by himself and look what he had done: not only had he put his family in danger, but now the rest of the country, too. And who knew what else this would lead to?

"Let me talk to him," he finally said, his voice a raw, cracking mess.

"Who?"

"This guy…this Skurge guy. Let me take a shot at him. Since I'm the target, maybe he'll talk to me. Coulson," he muttered the name through clenched teeth when the agent started to shake his head, more and more adamantly with each passing second. "Coulson, you have to — Phil! If you're not getting him to talk, the least you can do is give me a shot. You said he's in an impenetrable cell. Clamp him in some handcuffs and let me ask him some questions. The least that'll happen is he won't talk to me. The most? We might get an idea of who the fuck 'M' is and why she's trying to fuck up my life."

"Stark, technically speaking, you are a civilian," Coulson stated, a firm hand movement cementing his point. "You don't even have clearance for this. The only reason I'm telling you — against Director Fury's wishes, I might add — is because you are directly involved."

"Exactly! Let me in there!"

"Stark."

"Get me Fury." A spark of glee lit his eyes when Coulson showed the slightest hint of surprise. "Get him on the line. I'll bet you twenty bucks he'll agree to this." Tony's smile spread as Coulson reached across his desk and picked up the phone. He chuckled softly to himself when the agent alerted the prison guards to his and Mr. Stark's imminent arrival. "For the record, I didn't cheat on Loki. Let's go."

"Just a minute. I'm getting another call. Go ahead," he said into the phone. "What? Send him in."

"Coulson…"

"It's Thor." Tony frowned, turned when the door to Coulson's office opened and Thor rushed in. He looked worried then surprised when he spotted Tony.

"Tony? What are you doing here?"

"I could ask the same of you, big guy. What are you doing in New York?"

Thor glanced between them both, the worrisome look returning to drag the corners of his mouth down. "I had a meeting with a potential new client. Does Loki know you're here?"

"Yeah, of course. I, um, was just bringing that new technology up to S.H.I.E.L.D. Right, Phil?" The agent nodded when Thor looked to him. "What's going on? You look like you've seen a ghost or something."

Thor sighed and stepped closer, laying a heavy hand on Tony's shoulder. "I came to speak to Agent Coulson, but it is news for you to hear as well." Tony felt a sense of foreboding and did his best not to back up from his brother-in-law. "I've just received a call from Jane."

Tony's brow furrowed at his pause. "Wh-what is it? Is it the kids? Is Frigga okay? What?"

Thor's hand slid down to his elbow and he squeezed. "I am so sorry to be the one to tell you this, Tony. I'm afraid…Dr. Banner has…passed away suddenly."

Something sharp and hot bloomed in Tony's chest and now he did take a step away from Thor, stumbling back until he fell into the chair in front of Coulson's desk. He pressed a hand to his chest, his eyes burning and stinging with tears he didn't want to shed. He breathed out hard once. "Loki…I need Loki."

"Tony." Thor was there, in his vision, all blurred blond hair and a dark suit, gripping his hand tightly. Something hard was shoved into his other hand and in the next second he was swallowing down more scotch. Coulson and Thor were speaking, not to him, but to each other. Tony couldn't hear their muffled voices. All he could think about was getting home and getting to Loki. He blinked and thick tears streamed down his face. Then Thor was shoving a cell phone at him. "Tony? Tony!" He looked at the man, his words still not registering. He looked at the phone and allowed Thor to put it to his ear.

_ "Anthony? Anthony, are you there?" _

"Loki…?" he squeaked out.

_ "Thor told me about Dr. Banner. I'm so sorry. Darling, come home. Come back to me." _

"Okay." He nodded, as if convincing himself. "I'm coming. I'm coming back to you." In a quick succession of movements, Tony ended the call, jumped up, and dried his tears. "Coulson, find a secure place in L.A. I'll interview that guy we talked about after the…after. I'm going home." He turned to Thor, who was just getting to his feet. "Thor, tell Jane I'll call her when I get back and find out who's taking care of his estate and the details of the... " He sighed shortly. "The funeral. If it's not covered already, I'll pay for everything. Get back to me."

"Of course. Tony, I —"

"I gotta go. Just get that information." Without glancing back at either man, Tony fled from the room, pulling his own phone from his pocket to alert his pilot to ready the StarkJet.


	11. A Funeral, A Phone Call, and A Breaking Point

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> At Bruce’s funeral, Tony is withdrawn, from everyone, feeling unworthy of the inheritance from Bruce’s will. He perks up a little, while getting drinks with the other funeral guests, but his evening plans with Loki are ruined after a call from Coulson causes Loki’s suspicions to flare up once again.

In all the years Tony had been with Loki, he didn't think he had ever leaned on him the way he did following the news of Bruce's death. The moment he walked through the door when he got back to L.A., Loki was there, drawing him close, letting him cry on his shoulder. And he ably kept the kids at bay while Tony was dealing with his unstable emotions.

Though there was one moment when Audrey had slipped away from Loki, and crept down to the lab where Tony had hidden himself. He hadn't heard her come down the steps — and frankly, he wasn't sure if he should be impressed or worried by that — so when he felt little fingers prod at his back he had jerked up straight, spinning around wildly in his chair. Unfazed, Audrey had simply climbed into his lap, wrapped her arms around him and drew him close, asking quietly if he was sad because Uncle Brucie had gone up to heaven. He had murmured a soft yes into her shoulder, and Audrey nearly broke his heart in a completely different way, when she leaned back, cupped his bearded face, looked him straight in the eye and said, "It's okay, Daddy. You'll see him again someday. But 'til then I'm gonna take care of you."

For the most part, between him and Loki, Tony had always been the one to do the comforting, especially in that first year together, dealing with Loki's issues with Thor, Odin, and Laufey. Tony was secure in that position, even if Loki wasn't always happy being the consoled one; he felt less vulnerable being the strong one for his husband. Thinking back, he had never shed a tear for Howard. At the time, he was all cried out over Loki leaving him, and he let Pepper take care of the details of Howard's headline-making funeral and the handling of his will. By the time Jarvis had passed, Tony had shut off that part of himself, returning to the mostly amoral, unemotional mess he was before Loki had come along.

Losing Bruce had hit him hard; made all the more devastating because Tony had just seen him at Loki's birthday party over a month before. He wished he had spent more time with him that day.

Just days after he had returned home to L.A., Tony and Loki were flying back to the east coast, leaving the kids behind with Clint and Natasha — who would be flying in later when dates had been decided. Since that afternoon Thor had burst into Coulson's office, Tony had wondered why Thor felt the need to alert Coulson of Bruce's death. Tony was aware there were a few possibilities of how they knew each other, but he still wondered at their connection.

He found out exactly what it was at the reading of Bruce's will.

Apparently, once Bruce had signed over the controlling share in the lab to Jane, he had also hired recently-retired-senator-turned-lawyer Thor, for his business and personal needs. Bruce kept a small share in the lab, giving him free reign to come and go as he pleased. And while he was retired from most of the major work he had done in his career, the scientist had taken on a position with S.H.I.E.L.D., a very small one, supervising the mediocre scientists attempting to do the job Tony had refused to so many years ago.

Tony was floored by that particular revelation. As was Jane, who refused to even look at Thor for the remainder of the meeting, angry that he had never disclosed this information to her personally. Thor had prepared the will, and even as his wife pointedly ignored him, he read aloud Bruce's wishes.

Bruce preferred no services but recognized his friends would want to do something and asked that they kept it small and nondenominational, as he prescribed to no one religion himself. Bruce had been married once, Tony and Jane discovered. But Bruce's work and teaching schedule interfered and they parted amicably after just a few short years of marriage. Still, after all this time apart, he made sure she would be taken care of. Bruce made a small donation to the university, as well, and Jane received a private letter, but it was Tony who got the biggest endowment. No one was more surprised than him; even Loki wasn't very shocked when he told him, though he was very grateful. Like Jane, Tony had received a private letter; only his explained the inheritance — and other things, that later had Tony crouched in a tub in the bathroom of their hotel room, crying tears he didn't know he still had in him.

Bruce had written that his marriage hadn't produced any children, that he had devoted his life to his work. Science was his baby. Then an incredibly intelligent, smart aleck spoiled brat walked into his classroom — and some things changed. Namely, Bruce had taken Tony under his wing, both professionally and personally. Where most saw a cocky, rich kid looking for a good time, Bruce saw a lost boy, striving to please a father who would never care, covering it all up with witty sarcasm and an irresistible charm. But he also saw a brilliant scientist just waiting to emerge.

Bruce called Tony the son he had always wanted, but never got around to having — making Tony regret that he never got the chance to tell Bruce how much he cared about him and that he was a better father figure than Howard could have dreamt to be. And the best mentor he could have ever asked for.

Still, he was shocked that Bruce would leave him so much. His share in the lab, his home — that went back two generations in Bruce's family, but had no descendants to be given to — and the thousands of notebooks, compiled notes, every single detail of all of Bruce's life's work, all bequeathed to one Anthony Edward Stark.

Tony felt incredibly unworthy.

* * *

The day of the funeral, Tony was uncharacteristically quiet. No church services were held, as Bruce requested; just friends and colleagues, and other former students, aside from Tony himself and Jane, gathered at the funeral parlor for a memorial of sorts. Bruce had been cremated and Tony stared stoically, from the back of the room, at the decorative urn that now held the remains of his old friend.

Jane spoke up first, to tell a story of her time with the scientist. But halfway through, her emotions got the better of her and Thor had to help her back to her seat. Others spoke as well, recalling Bruce's mild manner, high intelligence, and quiet sweetness.

After the last person had gone up — a man who had been an undergrad with Bruce — and spoken of their first failed experiment, Loki had looked to Tony, silently questioning if he would speak of the man who had such an influence on his life. But Tony gave a short shake of his head and left the room. He couldn't bring himself to talk about Bruce. It was too fresh, too soon — too painful.

A small reception was going to take place at a favorite bar and restaurant of Bruce's not far away. Tony didn't want to go; he just wanted to go back to the hotel room and mope alone. He had snapped at both Thor and Loki for trying to convince him to go. In the end, all it took was a teary request from Jane to join her for a drink and toast their friend. So Tony went and parked himself at the bar, nursing a glass of Jack Daniels — because he felt like it, damn it — while the others sat at a huge round table and shared stories of "Dr. B," everyone's favorite science professor.

And Tony added another line to his long list of regrets.

* * *

Loki watched Tony from his seat next to Thor. And wondered what he had done wrong. He had been understanding; he had been comforting. He even made sure the kids didn't add any more stress to the grief Tony was working through. And it  _ was _ grief, he knew. Tony rarely expressed the emotion, but Loki knew how much Tony revered Dr. Banner since their college days, and before — before Loki entered the picture. Not even Pepper could get through to him at this point. And she had tried, over the phone, unable to fly out for the services.

Loki smiled and laughed with everyone else when Clint shared a story of having to ask for an extension on the date of a term paper because he'd contracted mono from one of his many hook-ups. Natasha didn't find that story very funny. Eventually, Loki wandered outside to call Frigga and check on the kids, because he needed to hear their voices. The phone rang three times before it was picked up, surprisingly by Sebastian.

_ "Odinson residence." _

Loki grinned at his son's voice. "Hello, Sebastian."

_ "Hi, Pop. How's Dad?" _

He pursed his lips a little, momentarily beaming with pride for his thoughtful son. "Oh, he's the same so far. How are you? How are the lines coming along?" he asked, referring to the new play Sebastian was going to be in the next month. An adaptation of  _ Sleeping Beauty _ called  _ Briar Rose _ , in which he would be playing the good prince.

Sebastian sighed unhappily.  _ "Fine…" _

Loki's lips twitched as he resisted the urge to smile more. "Is Anastasia still being difficult?"

" _ Kinda _ ," he muttered.

"Give her time, darling. She'll come around. Or you could take a page from your father's book and just burst into whatever room she happens to be in, demanding that she speak to you, no matter what she's doing."

Sebastian laughed softly, but more than he had in awhile. It sounded like music to Loki's ears.  _ "Did Dad really do that? To you?" _

"Yes, he did. He nearly scared your Aunt Peggy to death. And your Aunt Natasha was ready to punch him in the throat." They shared another laugh before Loki remembered where he was and quieted. "Your brother and sister; are they behaving?"

_ "Uh, Jazz is. Audi got in trouble." _

Loki sighed heavily. His little troublemaker. "What did she do?"

_ "She got mad at Ro — for some reason, I dunno — and pushed him. He fell on a table, took the table down and broke some porcelain thing that  _ bestefar _ Odin had given  _ bestemor _ Frigga forever ago." _

Loki groaned softly, closing his eyes. "Not the one of the Norse goddess?"

_ "Yeah…I think so." _

"Oh, that child is the cause of all of my gray hairs," he muttered, ignoring Sebastian's ensuing question for clarification. "Is she near you?"

_ "No.  _ Bestemor _ made her sit in a corner, facing the wall." _

Loki frowned in thought then laughed at the memory of all the times he and Thor had been sent to a corner like that. More Thor than him. "Let me talk to your grandmother."

_ "Okay, hold on.  _ Bestemor! _ " _

"Mm. Sebastian. My ear."

_ "Sorry."  _ Loki waited and listened as Sebastian went searching for Frigga. He heard Audrey's soft voice, but couldn't hear what she was saying. But Sebastian's responding,  _ "No, you're bad," _ was loud and clear. As was Audrey's resulting wail.

"Sebastian, do not taunt her," he scolded lightly.

_ "Sorry, Pop, I couldn't help it." _

"Try."

_ "Papaaaaaaa!" _

Loki pulled the phone from his face, so he could groan impatiently, then brought it back to tell Sebastian to pass the phone to the crying Audrey. Sebastian grumbled but did it anyway.  _ "Here, you big cry baby." _ Loki waited for Audrey to come on the line and managed to calm her down and lightly reprimand her for breaking a treasured item of Frigga's before Frigga finally came to the phone.

_ "Loki? Darling, are you there?" _

A sense of calm and comfort immediately came over Loki at the sound of his mother's voice. "I'm here, Mother. I just wanted to check on the kids. And make sure they aren't driving you mad."

Frigga chuckled.  _ "I think your little one needs a nap and a talking-to, but otherwise, they're all just fine. Though, Loki, darling, is there something going on with Bash and Natasha's little girl? He's been trying to butter her up all day and she just will not have it." _

"It's…complicated," he answered almost hesitantly. "I fear it will only get worse as they reach their teen years."

Frigga laughed one of her knowing laughs, making him frown.  _ "Not to be a meddler, my love, but have you or Tony had the S-E-X talk with your boy?" _

"I —"

_ "What's S-E-X?" _ Loki heard Audrey's voice, sounding far away.

_ Great _ . "Thank you for that, Mother," he said dryly into the phone. She ignored him, addressing his little girl instead.

_ "Don't you worry your pretty little head about it, dearest. Now, go to sleep." _

_ "But I wanna know now!" _

_ "Hush, child. You do not raise your voice to me. Now, go." _ Loki waited quietly, feeling almost sorry for Audrey being scolded, until Frigga returned to the line.  _ "Are you sure you're all right, Loki? How is Tony doing? Any change?" _

He sighed softly, doing his best to restrain the most of it. "No. He's still not talking to me — or anyone for that matter. He stood in the back at the service and now…he's simply sitting at the bar. Alone."

_ "Oh…well, give him time, darling. He'll come around."  _ Loki smiled at his echoed words to Sebastian.  _ "You could always force him to talk to you; but then, forcing Tony to do anything doesn't always go over well, does it?" _

"Not usually, no."

Frigga made a soft sympathetic noise.  _ "This was a big loss for him,  _ min sønn _. You remember what it was like when your father passed." _

Loki unintentionally scoffed, but smiled with it. "I was saddened, yes, since we had finally found some common ground and Sebastian was only an infant, but I spent most of my time consoling Thor. Anthony will not even let me do that."

_ "He will come to you in his own time, my love." _

"I suppose he will. I should get back inside. Oh! I didn't get a chance to speak to Jameson. Give him a kiss for me?"

_ "I will. Take care, darling." _

"See you later, Mother." Loki ended the call, exhaling a long breath as he stared at his phone. He contemplated texting Tony, just to see if he would respond that way. Shaking his head at the thought, he turned to head back in and when he pulled open the door, Natasha's big belly came out first.

"There you are. Where've you been?"

"I was checking in on the kids. Are you leaving so soon?" Loki looked between Natasha and Clint as they stepped completely out of the restaurant. He pursed his lips at Natasha when she groaned and stretched her back.

"Tasha's not feeling so hot."

"I need a bed," she bemoaned, making Loki and Clint chuckle. "Tony looked pretty ensconced in his whiskey, so…" Loki frowned at that. "Give him our love," she said as she pulled Loki into a hug. He pressed a kiss to her temple.

"I will. Check on Rowan and let me know how he is." He winced a little, trying to smile as well, when Clint and Natasha both frowned at him. "There may have been a little incident with him and Audrey."

Clint groaned loudly, throwing his head back. "Please tell me it's not another puppy love thing. I can't handle another Bash and Ana." Loki laughed harder than he meant to.

"No, no, just Audrey being her usual bullying self. No matter what we do we just cannot seem to break her of this hitting and pushing phase. I think bringing in another baby may make things worse."

"Hit her back," Natasha said bluntly.

"Tasha," Clint scolded her lightly, turning to give her a reprimanding look, as Loki let out a laughing, "What?"

She scoffed at her husband. "Give her a taste of her own medicine. I'm not saying you have to beat the girl, but if she doesn't know what it's like to get hit, she doesn't know what she's doing to her friends and cousins and siblings. So show her."

"Or perhaps I should simply have her spend a day with you," Loki offered with a grin.

"Or you could do that." Natasha laughed and it quickly turned into a pained groan and she bent forward a little, pressing a hand to her back, and Clint rushed forward, wrapping his arms around his wife from beside her.

"Come on, baby. Let's go. See you later, Loke."

"Bye." Loki waved at them, watched them until they disappeared around the corner into the parking lot then stepped into the restaurant. He was heading for the group still around the table — he could hear Thor's hearty laugh — and decided he would need a drink himself, just to help him relax. He stepped up to the bar's side, deciding to let Tony be, on the other side of the long mahogany bar. When the bartender approached, Loki quietly ordered a gin and tonic. He wasn't alone but a moment when he felt someone approach him on his side. Because the shadow cast over the bar top was so big he assumed it was Thor. He quickly learned it was not.

"Hey, beautiful." Loki shifted uncomfortably as the sandy-haired man leaned toward him and said nothing. "Can I buy that drink for you?"

Pointedly not looking directly at him, Loki sighed to let the man know he wasn't interested. "I am perfectly capable of purchasing my own drink, thank you. And even if I wasn't, I'm sure my  _ husband _ would gladly do it." He turned his eyes to the man, nearly glaring.

"Oh, so you got a husband, huh? And where is this lucky guy? Cause, I'll tell ya, if you were my husband, I wouldn't —"

A throat cleared loudly and Loki couldn't help but smirk as the man turned to look at the source. Tony raised a hand, wiggling his fingers in a cutesy wave as he continued to drink from his glass. Red-faced, the man turned away and left, leaving Loki chuckling to himself, pausing when Tony called out a soft, "Hey," for his attention.

When Loki looked at him, he jerked his head to motion him over, and the raven-haired man pointed at himself as if to say ‘ _ me? _ ' Tony chuckled and waved him over.

"C'mere."

Loki picked up his gin and tonic just as the bartender set it before him and walked around to lean against the bar next to Tony, facing him. "Hello," he murmured, unsure what else he should say.

Tony looked up at him with bloodshot, watery eyes. "Hey, baby."

Loki bit back a sigh; his heart hurt seeing Tony like this. It went quiet between them for a few moments, and when Loki started to speak, Tony did, too.

"How are you —?"

"I'm sorry I —"

They both chuckled then Tony motioned for him to speak. "I just wanted to know how you were doing."

"Fine," he answered with a lazy shrug. He pressed a finger to Loki's chest, dragging it down to hook around his suit jacket where it was buttoned. "I've missed you today."

Loki lifted his brows. "I've been right here. All day."

The genius looked down, laid a hand over Loki's, and laced their fingers, bringing their joined hands to his chest. "I know," he rasped. He looked up again, his eyes never wavering from Loki's even as they glistened. "Do you have any idea how much I love you?"

Loki felt a little flutter at the direct eye contact and the unexpected words, and pursed his lips a little. "No. I only know that you do."

"I do." Tony tugged on Loki's hand to bring him closer. "Lay one on me." Loki stumbled forward, blinking at the sudden change in his husband. He grinned, and had to fight back laughter. "Gimme a kiss," Tony demanded softly, raising his chin, offering his mouth. Loki sighed in a bit of exasperation, but lowered his lips to Tony's anyway, intending to give him a simple peck. He should've known better. Tony slipped a hand into his hair, keeping him in place against his mouth, deepening the kiss, sliding his tongue along the seam of Loki's lips then curling up inside it. Loki pressed a hand to his chest.

"Mm. Anthony." The word was mumbled against his lips.

"Hmm?"

Loki laughed against his mouth, struggling to move away, his eyes darting around the room. Thankfully, no one was looking at them. "We are in public."

"So what?" Tony undid the buttons of Loki's suit jacket, slid his arm inside of it, and tugged him even closer. Loki was finally able to lift his mouth away anyway and let out a soft grumble as Tony moved to focus on his neck; he pushed back as much as Tony would allow.

"Anthony, what were you going to say?" He chuckled when Tony placed two kisses at his neck. Tony leaned back and smiled softly.

"That I'm sorry I've been so…distant. I think I regressed a little this past week."

Loki softened instantly, brushed a hand over Tony's hair where it was slightly mussed from Tony wringing his hands through it all day. "You've been in mourning, darling. And this was a big loss for you. The biggest since your mother, I would presume."

Tony reached for Loki's hand, bringing it down and pressing his lips to his fingers. He lingered there a moment before looking up into his eyes. "I don't deserve you."

Loki chuckled, amused at first, then grew quiet when he realized Tony was being serious. "You don't mean that…do you?"

"Loki," he sighed. "I…" He jerked when Loki laid a hand over his mouth.

"Stop. Don't say another word. You are feeling a lot of things right now, love, the foremost emotion being grief." He moved his hand to brush his fingers across Tony's cheek, down to cup around the side of his neck. "But I will not allow you to sit here and wallow in what you think are your regrets and mistakes."

"But I could've been better, babe. To you, to the kids, to Pepper, and Stark Industries and S.H.I.E.L.D."

"Better than what? You are a wonderful husband…when you put in the effort," he added with a small smile. "And you are the only man who I would to be the other father of our children. You give your all to your work — to the point of frustration for me, but…" Tony snorted and laughed but grew quiet when Loki cupped his face, lifting it to his as he leaned down toward him. "You make me happy. And let's face it, I'm the only one that matters." Tony laughed, a deep rumble in his chest that shook his whole body, and it warmed Loki to hear it, so he lowered his mouth to his.

"You are aware we can see you, are you not?"

"Shut up, Thor," they responded in unison, laughing when the table, including Thor, laughed with them. Loki playfully glared at Thor as Tony slipped his arm around his waist and pulled him closer.

"You talk to the kids yet?"

"Yes. They're fine," Loki answered, leaning into Tony, draping an arm around his neck. "But there was a small incident with Audrey and Rowan."

Tony groaned, figured his baby girl likely beat the crap out of Natasha's kid. "Any casualties?"

Loki winced a little. "Hmm, only mother's Freya goddess statue. Odin gave her that on their first wedding anniversary."

"Yikes. I guess a replacement wouldn't mean much."

"Not likely." Loki scrunched up his nose and shook his head.

"Hey…" Loki thought Tony was in a better mood now, as he laid his hands at Loki's waist, and wiggled him a little. "D'you think Mama Frigga would be willing to keep the monsters overnight?"

Loki angled his head, but couldn't help the curve of his lips. "Why?" His lips curved more when Tony covertly let his hand slide over Loki's hip and down to cup his ass.

"I want to spend a night with you, uninterrupted."

"Just you and me?" he asked with a cock of his brow. Tony nodded and bit his lip. "I would like that very much," he murmured and pressed a chaste, sweet kiss to his lips. He pulled away before Tony could press it any further and slipped his hands into Tony's. "Come now. Join your friends for a bit."

Tony glanced at the table and started to follow Loki. "Yeah, okay —" He paused when his phone began to vibrate in his jacket pocket. "Damn it."

"Ignore it." Loki tugged on his arm, but Tony already had his phone out.

"Ah, I can't. It's Coulson."

"Why is he calling? I thought you turned everything that you'd been working on over to him."

Tony looked down at his phone. "Um, yeah. I did. Probably just a question or something." He stepped forward and pecked the corner of Loki's mouth, giving his hand a squeeze. "Be back in a bit." Loki watched him go with a frown, angry with himself for immediately feeling suspicious again.

"Loki. Come join us." He nodded at Thor, picked up his drink and asked for a refill for Tony before moving to the table to sit beside Thor.

* * *

_ "Mr. Stark." _

Tony rolled his eyes as he exited the restaurant and put the phone at his ear. "Cut it out, Phil. What do you want? And why didn't you come to the funeral?"

_ "I've been trying to get something out of Morgan. I couldn't get away. But there was an arrangement sent by S.H.I.E.L.D." _

"Whatever."

_ "Stark. He'll talk. But only to you." _

Tony let out a long breath. "Seriously?"

_ "Yes. Can you get back today?" _

Tony thought of Loki and having the night with him. He needed it, needed the contact with his husband, to just lose himself in those arms, those legs, that body. To remember what it felt like to show him how he loved him and how it felt to be loved. To be alive. "No. Sorry. But I'm not rushing my kids and Loki onto a plane without a good enough excuse."

He could hear Coulson sigh.  _ "Tony. You're going to have to tell him eventually." _

"My way, my time. Got it?" He took Phil's silence as confirmation. "See you when I see you." Tony ended the call, and not for the first time in his life, missed the satisfaction of slamming a phone receiver down to do so.

He stood there for a moment, in front of the restaurant, ignoring passerby and the fast-moving traffic on the busy street, lost in his thoughts, anger building. He was sick of this, sick of other people dictating his life. And not just the asshole who broke into his house. He'd had about all he could take from S.H.I.E.L.D., and contemplated terminating his relationship as consultant with them, once this mess was fixed and behind him.

Somewhere in the back of his busy, preoccupied mind, Tony was recalling stuff he'd learned in that one psych class he took his third year in college. Psychobabble bullshit he didn't buy into one bit, but one word from that dreaded class was coming to the forefront of his thoughts: projecting. He was projecting, he knew it. He was angry with himself, for letting this whole situation get so out of hand. Pacing a little bit, fingers snapping and hands clapping in a nervous habit he hadn't exhibited in years — literally not since he and Loki had gotten married, Tony considered his options.  _ Damn it _ , he thought, kicking a random pebble with his shiny dress shoe. Phil was right; he needed to tell Loki. And he knew in his heart, had he just been honest with Loki, back in September, about the woman and his suspicions, if he had just let Loki have that talk like he wanted, maybe…

"Anthony?"

"What?" Tony whirled around, surprised at his husband's voice. "Hey, babe. You snuck up on me." He grinned at his husband, eyebrows twitching a little at the look on Loki's face.

"Is everything all right?"

"With what?"

Loki's brows drew together over narrowed eyes. "Agent Coulson. That was who were speaking with, was it not?"

Tony's back went up a bit at Loki's suspicious tone and the way his husband crossed his arms and raised his chin. He moved like royalty sometimes. "Yeah. Everything's fine. He just wanted to make sure that S.H.I.E.L.D.'s arrangement arrived with no problem. Since, you know, he couldn't make it." Loki kept his hard gaze on him, almost penetrating right through him.

"Was that all?"

"Mm-hmm, yeah…" Loki didn't look convinced. Tony started closer, already reaching for Loki's hands.

"How long do you think you can keep this up?"

Panic ran a direct line up Tony's spine, had him freezing mid-reach. He quickly relaxed and tried a chuckle. "Keep what up? What are you talking about, babe?"

Loki was trying to control himself, Tony could tell. His lips were a thin straight line, his jaw muscles twitched. Tony had a hard time not squirming under that harsh gaze. "All these years…"

_ Shit goddamn it motherfucking hell. _

"And you  _ still _ think I cannot tell when you're keeping something from me?"

Tony tried a laugh and a smile, stepping closer. "Loki, I'm not keeping —"

"No." Loki took one step back, distancing himself from Tony, and dropped his arms. He shook his head and reached for the door handle. "I do not want to have this conversation right now."

_ Shit, shit, shit _ . Tony's heart started to pound and he snagged Loki's elbow, pulling him away from the restaurant's door when he tried to go back in. "Babe, you're overreacting."

" _ No _ ." Loki yanked his arm from Tony's grasp, holding up one long, firm finger. "You do not get to put this on me. You have been keeping something from me for months now. You think I cannot see how you are struggling with something?"

"I'm not — I'm not struggling. Loki — I'm fine." Shit, how did Loki know? Wasn't he a better liar than this once upon a time?

"You're  _ not _ fine!"

Tony jolted back a little at the near snarl that came out of Loki. "Loki." His own voice was soft, reprimanding.

"You are hiding something from me, your husband, and now you are lying. Again."

Tony was starting to sweat and the only thing his brain could compute was  _ fix this, fix this now _ . "Loki, I'm not —"

"Anthony." Again, Loki's tone shut Tony up. " _ Stop _ lying to me."

Tony's anger resurfaced and he scowled hard at Loki. "I did not lie to you."  _ Technically. _ "So quit blowing everything out of proportion and making my work stuff about us."

Loki straightened his back and sighed, holding out his hand. "Give me the keys to the car."

"What?" Tony asked the question even as he reached into his pocket for the keys to the rental car — an understated black sedan that Loki forced him to get because the kids wouldn't fit comfortably in the Mustang convertible he really wanted. The second his hand was out of his pocket, Loki snatched the keys from him. "Where are you going?"

Loki turned away and started for the parking lot. "To my mother's to pick up the children then back to the hotel."

Disappointment and fear settled like heavy metals in Tony's belly as he followed. "Wait! I thought we were gonna spend the night alone, just the two of us." He stumbled to a halt when Loki stopped and half-turned to face him, eyes narrowed.

"When you are ready to share with me what is going on with you, we shall do that. Until then, I will be with our children."

Tony clenched his teeth and trailed after Loki again, as he continued to the car. "Come on, Loki. We're gonna go through this shit again? You said you didn't want to do this today. We're at Bruce's fucking funeral! Can't you take a day off from accusing me of —"

"I have accused you of  _ nothing _ , Anthony, but not being honest with me." Loki had halted by the car, after just unlocking it with a button on the keyring. "This could all be solved if you would just  _ tell me what is going on _ ."

Tony watched Loki, practically begging before him, and still his mouth wouldn't move to give him what he wanted. "There's nothing —" Loki scoffed angrily, throwing his hands up. He started around the car and Tony moved to get in the passenger side. But just as he got it open, Loki was there, slamming it shut again. After locking it.  "What are you doing?"

"I'm going alone," Loki muttered, rounding the car to the driver's side. Tony stared, open-mouthed, and frowning.

"What? What the hell am I supposed to do?"

"You're so used to doing things on your own, Anthony," Loki paused, one foot in the car, and flicked his eyes up. "Figure it out."

Tony stood by, fuming, as Loki drove off and left him behind.


	12. Nigh On A Decade

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the argument Loki and Tony had, tensions in the Stark household are at an all-time high. Adding to the stress, Audrey gets in trouble at school — and with Loki — Sebastian pries into Tony and Loki’s relationship, and Tony prepares to interrogate Victor Morgan at S.H.I.E.L.D.

Throughout their twenty year relationship, Tony and Loki had had some notorious fights. Screaming matches, thrown objects, and oft-slammed doors were the norm, especially when they were sharing an apartment in college — and it was the increase in those fights, in occurrence and ferocity, that led to their first break-up. When the kids came along, they adapted to keeping it subdued, learning to talk things through, calmly. At least, as calmly as two hotheads like them could, and in the privacy of their bedroom.

But this fight was different.

After Loki left him stranded at Bruce’s funeral, Tony was pissed. He stewed over a few more drinks in the bar, and continued to bask in resentment in the backseat of the cab he rode back to the hotel. Furious was an understatement when, after arriving at the hotel, he discovered he would have to spend the night sleeping in a stiff armchair in the corner, as both beds were taken. One by Loki and Audi, the other by a sprawled out Jazz and long-legged Bash.

Tony’s frustration only grew as the days went on and Loki refused to speak to him. Hell, he refused to even look at him. He played the part when the kids were in the room, addressing him when it was necessary, but once they were alone, all Tony got was the cold shoulder. It was driving him crazy. At first, Tony just brushed it off and let Loki have his pouty way. But after weeks of the silent treatment, the genius had had enough and he’d taken to sleeping in the lab. He made sure Jarvis woke him in time to get up to the bedroom before the kids woke and the estranged couple went about their day. Tony knew all it would take to fix the situation was to tell Loki the truth and explain what was going on with...everything. But every time he tried, his fear of Loki leaving him all but paralyzed him, and he couldn’t bring himself to.

And today, he needed to concentrate on the task at hand: interrogating Victor Morgan.

Dressed casually in a black polo shirt and jeans, Tony headed down for breakfast, steeling himself for Loki’s tight-lipped and icy looks. Jazz and Audi greeted him warmly as he walked in, aiming to fix himself a cup of coffee. As he did, he caught the way Loki’s eyes raked over him, a black brow cocking curiously, and their eyes met. Tony waited for the question that was indubitably on Loki’s tongue, but he said nothing. The moment passed when Bash came running into the room demanding he and Tony leave. With the slightest of eyerolls, Loki had simply looked away.

* * *

Just like every other time he had dealt with S.H.I.E.L.D., Tony Stark walked in with a chip on his shoulder. He went through the rigamarole of security, one of the guards earning a dirty look for touching his junk for no good goddamn reason, and was led to the interrogation rooms. Agent Coulson and Director Fury were already in one room, discussing something quietly as Tony entered.

“Morning, sunshine,” Tony greeted Director Fury before looking at Coulson. “Phil.” He moved to the table set against the back wall to make himself another cup of coffee, grumbling a little to himself about how tiny the styrofoam cup was, ignoring whatever displeased look Fury was likely giving him.

“Thank you for coming in, Stark,” Fury said with no hint of appreciation.

“Didn’t have much of a choice, did I?” Tony turned to face the two men, the miniature cup at his lips, and froze. He hadn’t noticed the giant one-way mirror when he stepped in, so focused on getting another shot of caffeine he was. And there, on the other side of the mirror, in the interrogation room, being chained to the steel table bolted to the floor, was Victor Morgan, a.k.a. Skurge, a.k.a. the son of a bitch that broke into his home.

He didn’t look much like what Tony had expected. The genius could blame the action movies of the Nineties for what he had pictured: a big, dark, burly man with tattoos covering every inch of visible skin who was the living embodiment of a villain. Particularly with a street name like Skurge. This guy...had none of that. He was muscular, yes, but didn't seem much taller than Tony. And his hair was that color that just teetered the edge between ginger and dark blonde.

“You okay, Star — Tony?” Coulson moved closer and studied Tony’s face. “...Tony?”

He blinked and jerked himself out of his trance. “I’m fine. When can I get in there? I got a lot of questions for this guy.”

“We need to go over what you’re going to be asking first,” Fury commented, looking up from the paperwork in front of him. “And what information we need.”

Tony raised a brow, his eyes blank. “I’m going to find out what he knows about this ‘M’ bitch and why she had the asshole break into my house. What else is there?”

The director made an exasperated face and seemed to let out a long breath, slowly and through his nose. “We need to know who her affiliates are. Where her base is. Who she’s worked with before and working with now.”

“I don’t give a shit about any of that,” Tony blurted out after finishing off his coffee and tossing the cup in the trash. “All I want is my information. When I’m done you can do whatever the hell you want with him.” He headed for the door, stopping when it was Coulson who called his name. He turned the upper half of his body, saying nothing, but the look on his face clearly said  _ What? _

The agent held up his hand, an earpiece between his fingers. “Put this in? We need to communicate with you while you’re in there.”

As he usually did when within the walls of S.H.I.E.L.D. and dealing with their stupidity, Tony rolled his eyes. “How many times do I have to tell you guys that I’m a goddamn genius?” He pointed to his ear. “Jarvis has been linked to your network since I started inhaling the stuffy-as-shit air in the building.” He plucked the earpiece from Coulson’s hand and examined it. Then tossed it to the table behind Fury. “Junk. Don’t distract me while I’m in there, all right?" He gave the agent’s arm a light punch and walked out of the room, heading into the next.

For all his bravado with Fury and Coulson, Tony’s heart was racing when he stepped into the interrogation room. The guard locking the door behind him, echoed throughout the cement-walled room, and the genius was struck by the fact that he was now alone with a dangerous criminal. Who was smiling at him.

“Anthony Stark, in the flesh.”

Tony’s brow knitted, surprised at the heavy Irish brogue. “Only my husband can call me that.”

Victor lifted his hands in a surrender gesture, as much as he could, as they were attached to the bolted down table by a chain. “How are things with you and the raven-haired man? Still fighting?”

Tony’s face hardened further, hiding the deep sense of violation he felt at the question, and he gave a sharp shake of his head. “I'm not here to answer your questions, Morgan. You're gonna answer mine.”

The Irishman nodded. “Was just bein' friendly, is all. What d’you want to know?”

Moving into the room further, Tony angled his head a little, narrowing one eye at the other man. “Where're you from?”

“Can you not tell?” he asked with a snort. “I hail from the Emerald Isle, Mr. Stark. Dublin, to be precise.”

Slightly more comfortable, Tony forced the frown from his face, and stood behind the chair across from Victor. “All right. Let's just get down to business. Who's 'M?'”

“Tsk, tsk, tsk.” Victor wagged his finger at Tony. “We're to make a deal first, Mr. Stark.” Tony scoffed, about to speak when Fury buzzes in his ear.

_ “No deals, Stark.” _

“Suck it, Nick,” he muttered under his breath before speaking to Victor. “You're not gonna get outta here, Vic. So what are you negotiating for?”

The criminal smiled again. It unnerved Tony how friendly he looked. “I know I'll not be getting out of these chains any time soon.” They clinked and clattered again as he motioned with his hands. “Perhaps you can bargain for my stay to be a little more...comfortable.”

_ “Stark, you are not authorized —” _

Tony turned sharply to the mirror where Fury and Coulson were stealthily watching and it immediately went silent in his ear again. “I don't know what you think I can do for you,” he said to Victor. He jerked a thumb toward the mirror. “They'd sooner throw me in here than let me make a deal with you.”

“You're Tony Stark, mate. You've got influence, even if the man with the patch won't admit it.” That made Tony snicker, but he quickly sobered.

“Before I agree to anything, why don’t you tell me how I’m supposed to know I can trust your information?” A chill crept up Tony’s spine, had the hairs on the back of his neck rising, when Victor smiled slowly. Predatorily.

“That little Audrey of yours is real pretty.” Tony stiffened, clenched his jaw. “I'll bet she grows up to be as beautiful as her mum.”

The steel chair provided for Tony clanged loudly after he tossed it aside, lunging forward to slap his palms to the table, stopping only when Coulson shouted his name, loudly, in his ear. Irritation surged when all Victor did was dip his head back to keep his eyes on Tony. And those two cups of coffee threatened to violently make a reentrance when the bastard grinned sadistically at him. “You keep my girl's name out of your filthy mouth, you son of a bitch!”

_ “Stark. Come out of there. Now.” _

“Not 'til this is settled,” he growled back, eyes never leaving Victor’s. Tony nearly snarled when Victor grinned, almost cheerfully.

“What would they like to offer?”

Tony leaned away, stepping back from the table. “Fury.” There was no sound on the other side for several long moments. “Fury!”

_ “All right,” _ the director snapped. A weary sigh.  _ “Maximum security. No general population. That's it.” _

Tony listened, nodded. “Max security, no gen pop. As good as you're gonna get, pal.”

Victor’s aquamarine eyes rose to the ceiling, considering. “I've two conditions,” he held up two fingers in a ‘V’. “Then I'll accept.”

_ “No.” _

“Wait,” Tony hissed at Fury then jerked his chin at Victor. “Shoot.”

“I want to be transferred every three months.”

“What?” The word echoed in Tony’s ear. “What the hell for?”

“‘M,’ as she so vaguely refers to herself, her arm stretches farther than you might think, Mr. Stark. I stay in the same place for six months, I'm guaranteed dead by four or five, if that. This way I'm just a little ahead of her.”

Scratching at his head, Tony moved away from the table to pick up the chair he’d knocked over, softly murmuring, “What do you think?”

Another long pause.  _ “We'll do our best.” _

He returned to the table, nodded at Victor to let him know S.H.I.E.L.D. agreed. “What's the second condition?”

Victor smirked, sitting back in his chair, as much as the chains around his wrists would allow. “I would like a friendly visitor each time I change prisons.”

“What?” Tony scoffed. “Wait a minute. Are you seriously telling me that you want S.H.I.E.L.D., the Strategic, Homeland, Intervention, Enforcement, and Logistics Division, a covert government organization that exists to rid the planet of worse scum than you, to pay for an escort for you four times a year? You're fucking crazy.”

“No, mate; I'm crafty.” Victor chuckled darkly. “You can't expect me to go the rest of my life without a little fun.”

“I'm sure you'll find plenty of fun in prison.”

Victor chuckled. “Not all of us play that hand, Mr. Stark.”

Tony grinned smugly — despite the fact he hadn’t had that kind of fun in a while. The thought still brought a smile to his face. “Don't knock it 'til you try it, Ireland.”

“Maybe you should send that leggy husband of yours —” Victor didn’t get to finish that sentence before Tony’s fist was flying across his mouth. Pain shot straight up his arm, and somewhere Fury was yelling his name, but it didn’t stop Tony from fisting his hands in the orange jumpsuit Victor was dressed in. Coulson had burst into the room by then, and was pulling at Tony, dragging him away from Victor, and holding him back with a strength Tony hadn’t expected Coulson to have.

_ “Mr. Stark,” _ he said firmly, trying to get Tony to focus on him. Tony’s chest rose and fell with his heavy breaths, glaring at Victor as he laughed and spit blood onto the concrete floor. At another shout of his name, Tony looked at Coulson and shoved him back, though he didn’t go far.

“I’m fine. I’m fine!” He said again, throwing Coulson off of him this time.

“It’s all right, Agent Coulson.” Both men looked at Victor, still working his jaw. Tony took great pleasure in the blood already crusting at the corner of the man’s mouth. “It’s a touchy subject for our friend here.”

Coulson released Tony only to move around the table to stare down Victor. “Do not provoke him again. We don’t have any rules here, Mr. Morgan. I’m not above letting him pummel your face for five minutes if he wants.”

Victor acknowledged that with a tip of his head, and licked at the cut in his lip as he watched Coulson leave. His eyes darted to Tony as he moved to take the seat across from Victor. “Feelin' better?”

Tony’s dark eyes flicked up as he sat, cradling his likely bruising hand in his lap, under the table. “Look, you got half your deal. Fury’s never gonna go for the other part, so start giving up some information. Who is M?”

“Can’t tell ya what I don't know.” He threw up a hand when Tony scowled more and before he blew his top again. “The woman goes to great lengths to keep herself hidden.”

“What does that mean?”

Victor shrugged. “I never met with her for the job on your house. I was contacted by wire, the money was sent by wire, and the items were left at a specific location decided on by her. And likely picked up by one of her flunkies.”

Tony sighed heavily, dropping an elbow on the table and scrubbing at his face. He looked up, about to question Victor further when Fury popped up in his ear.  _ "Ask about known associates.” _ Tony rolled his eyes. “You say you never met her. How’d she know to contact you to break into my house?”

“I’m not hard to find. I’m a small-time criminal, Mr. Stark,” Victor said with a shrug.

Tony scoffed and cocked a brow. “Small-time?” He held up a hand and started to count off. “Theft, assault, drug possession, kidnapping —”

“Those charges were dropped!” The Irishman’s face nearly went purple with the vehemence with which he spoke.

_ “Stark. Focus.” _

He glanced off to the side, biting back a smart retort. “Go on.”

“I’ll tell you this much: she’s had surveillance on you for nigh on a decade now.”

“What?” Tony shot up straight in his chair, his stomach doing a nervous flip. Victor lifted a brow and nodded. “Why?”

“Don’t know. She’s got contacts and informants stashed all over the world. She’s been watching you more closely since her husband died. How'd you think I knew you were fighting with your husband?” he asked with a smirk.

Mind already working, Tony sat forward, brow knitted once more. “Who’s her husband?”

The Irishman shrugged again. “Another shadowy figure. He has a reputation amongst the...underground community. He was good to some of the younger boys, provided jobs when needed, and places to stay. It was rare when he had to take a firm hand, but when he did...everybody heard about it. Rumor was he met a woman at a party and fell in love, and when he married her things changed. After decades in this business, he tried to go straight. But...something went wrong; their investment or someone they trusted went awry, and the stress...must’a killed him. Some think  _ she  _ killed him. Poison or such, but either way...he left everything to her. And she took over the old business because it brought in the money. She’s been tryin’ to find a way to get at you ever since.”

“But —”

_ “A name, Stark. Get a name. Any name!” _

“I’m trying!” Frustration building, Tony blew out a breath and looked at Victor again. He looked confused at the interaction. “You got a name for this guy?”

“No,” Victor answered shaking his head. “In the community, he has many names. Some call him the Savior. Others, funnily enough, the Godfather.” He leaned to his side and looked toward the mirror. “Your government friends may know him as something else." He spoke up louder, so they could hear him on the other side.

“What?” Again, the word echoed in Tony’s ear.

“The Mandarin.”

The name meant nothing to Tony. Shifting around in his chair, Tony looked at his reflection in the mirror. “You know it?”

_ “No. We’re looking into it now.” _

He made an irritated noise. S.H.I.E.L.D. was supposed to be on top of these kinds of things and people. The fact that they weren’t didn’t bode well for Tony. He turned back to Victor. “What else?”

“S’all I know, mate. I couldn’t even tell you who might know her personally.”

Tony leaned forward a little on the table. “Could you get me in touch with her?”

_ “Stark. We didn’t agree to that.” _ Tony waved Fury off, nearly snarling again.

Victor stared blankly at Tony for a moment, wondering what Tony’s gesture was all about. “Not directly, no. I could get in touch with my contact. Relay a message.”

_ “Stark! This was not agreed to. You cannot make plans to meet this woman on your own. Not without—” _

“Jarvis, mute.” The connection buzzed for a second then went silent. “Do that,” Tony said to Victor as he started to rise. He turned, starting for the door, wincing at the pain still ringing through the bones of his hand.

“Oi.” Just before he was about to knock on the door, to let the guard know to unlock it, Tony stopped and looked back at Victor. “That’s a mighty big favor I’d be doin’ you, don’t you think, Mr. Stark?”

His eyes narrowed. “What do you want?” Tony jolted back a little when the door opened. The guard made a face at him that Tony nearly laughed at. He was telling him Fury was pissed and on his way.

“Haven’t had a steak in ages,” Victor called out, regaining Tony’s attention. Tony looked at him, and for a moment pitied him.

“Stark. Out.  _ Now. _ ”

He held up a finger at Fury. “I’ll make sure you get one. On me.”

Victor gave him nod, grinning almost smugly at Fury, standing in the doorway with the darkest look he’d ever seen on the one-eyed face. He chuckled, when Fury all but yanked Tony from the room. “Pleasure doin’ business with you, Mr. Stark!”

* * *

Tony returned home at his normal time that night, exhausted, weary, and worried about how long until he might hear about getting a meet with ‘M.’ He’d had his hand checked out in the infirmary at S.H.I.E.L.D., and thankfully hadn’t broken anything. His knuckles were bruised, but had long stopped throbbing. If he kept his hand out of sight, maybe Loki wouldn’t notice.  _ Fat chance _ , he thought getting out of the car. Halfway up to the house, the door opened and Audi came flying out. Tony smiled weakly and caught her just as she jumped into his arms, wincing only slightly as his fingers flexed.

“Oof! Hi, Monkey.” Tony settled her against him, her tiny bottom resting on his folded forearms.

"Hi, Daddy! Missed you." She added a kiss to his cheek.

"Missed me?" Tony’s personal bullshit meter was ticking, but he smiled happily anyway. "You just saw me this morning, you silly girl."

"I know."

_ “Audrey Maria Stark!” _

Tony and Audi looked at each other; he, with a knowing look, and she, with wide eyes and a trembling lip. “Why’s your father full-naming you?” She shrugged, but her fingers tightened in his shirt with each step Tony took that brought them closer to the house.

Loki appeared in the doorway looking very unhappy and scary, even to Tony. “Get your behind in here this instant,” he growled through clenched teeth, snapping his fingers in a sweeping motion to get her inside. Setting Audi on her feet just before reaching the porch, Tony watched his little girl walk quickly inside, pouting and on the verge of tears. Before he could ask what was going on, Loki turned away to follow Audi. “Get upstairs, young lady, and do not come out of your room until I or your father call you. Do you understand?”

"Yes,  _ Pappa _ ," she sniffled and took off running up to her room.

Tony watched the whole thing with a frown as he closed the door behind him, and trailed after Loki, following him into the kitchen. “Wanna tell me what that was about?”

Loki was headed for the sink, reaching into the cabinet beneath it for a five-pound bag of potatoes. After he set them on the counter, he returned to the counter Tony was standing near and reached for a letter on the counter, tossing it wordlessly his way. Tony picked it up with his good hand, giving Loki an exasperated look for not just telling him, then read the letter from Audi’s school. It explained that she had slapped another student in the face and was being suspended for two days. He made a disgruntled noise in his throat, looking up at Loki, at the sink washing his hands before grabbing several potatoes to wash.

“What the hell is — seriously? She’s been in school for seven months. How is she already getting suspended?”

Loki barely spared him a glance. “We’re lucky she is not getting expelled. I had to make some excuses and explanations just to keep her there.”

Tony clamped down on his temper, sighing and feeling a headache start to throb at his temples, recognizing now that Audi had been trying to butter him up. “Okay. So what do we do now?”

Loki dumped the cleaned potatoes into a bowl then moved to the refrigerator to pull out some vegetables, carrying them to the sink, speaking to Tony, almost absently, as he moved about. “About what? What she’s to do the next two days or why we can’t seem to curb this violent behavior in our daughter?”

Tony followed Loki with his eyes, seeing him make sharp, jerky movements as he prepared dinner, knowing full well this wasn’t helping things between the two of them. “I meant the latter, but since you brought up the former…”

Loki paused long enough to shoot an irritated look Tony’s way. “You need not worry. As usual, I’ve handled everything.” Tony rolled his eyes —  _ after  _ Loki looked away. “I’ve made an appointment with a therapist.”

"For who?" Tony questioned, feeling a little uncomfortable all of a sudden, his back stiffening. Loki turned to look at him, an incredulous expression creasing his features, but something darker simmered beneath his eyes.

"For Audrey, who else?" He turned back to the vegetables, pulling out a knife from a block set in the corner and a carving board from behind it, and moved to the clearest counter — the one near Tony. "Though she’s not the only one who could benefit from some therapy," he muttered as he started to peel a carrot.

Tony sighed, pinched the bridge of his nose. “Do you think we could we go maybe five seconds without your snarky asides, babe?” Loki brought the knife down on the cutting board with a particularly hard chop, his jaw clenching. Tony cleared his throat softly, and asked his next question calmly, hoping to diffuse the tension that hung around them like a dark cloud lately. “Why do you want to take her to a therapist?”

"There is obviously something behind all of this aggression and violent behavior. Perhaps you care not, but I would very much like to get to the bottom of it, sooner rather than later.”

"Just because it wasn’t my idea doesn’t mean I don’t care," Tony retorted sharply, eyeing Loki as he quickly, and sloppily, chopped the carrots.

"Could’ve fooled me," Loki mumbled.

"Knock it off." Loki slanted him a look, but said nothing. "I get it, okay? I’m the shittier father."

Loki sighed, shook his head, and went back to chopping. “I never said those words.”

"You didn’t have to, Loki. Look, you wanna take her to a shrink, fine. I won’t argue; it’s probably a good idea. But do you think we could have just one night when we’re not bickering at each other?" Loki stopped again, appearing to study the knife during his pause. "Don’t get me wrong; it’s  _ almost  _ preferable to the silent treatment. But, the truth is, I had a hell of a day and I’d just like to relax with my family over a nice meal.”

"Hm." Loki carried the cutting board of carrots to the stove and dumped them into a saucepan. He returned to the counter and started peeling potatoes. His movements told Tony he still wasn’t happy. "Then I shall refrain from speaking for the remainder of the night. Will that help?"

"Fucking Christ, Loki!"

"Keep your voice down," he practically hissed, glaring at Tony. When Loki spoke again, his voice was lowered, but deep and laced with indignation. "You want a peaceful night? You don’t want to argue? Very well. I won’t question you about your day, though it is  _ glaringly _ obvious by your casual attire, you did not spend it cooped up in your office. And since there are no grease stains on your hands, your arms, your face, nor is your hair mussed from the endless amount of times you usually drag your fingers through it, neither did you spend it in your lab. Now  _ leave me be _ to make your family’s meal."

Tony stared at Loki in shocked silence. He had had no idea Loki paid that much attention to him when he came home after a long day. But obviously, he did. Still, however true Loki’s assessment was, it was a slap to his pride. “I  _ was _ working, smart ass.”  Loki jerked his head back and cocked a brow.  Knowing that was a mistake, Tony looked away with a heavy sigh. “I’m…I’m sorry. That was…look, maybe I wasn’t wearing a suit and maybe I wasn’t at the office but I was working, Loki. Like I do every day, I work hard for this family,  _ our _ family, and frankly, I don’t think I need to put up with your shit when I come home.”

For a few long moments, Loki didn’t respond and just continued to chop. When he did begin to speak, he was still chopping, each word punctuated with each hit of the knife to the board. “You know perfectly well how to fix it.”

Frustrated, Tony reached over the counter to halt Loki’s movements. Loki flicked his gaze up, a hint of surprise in them. “Can’t you just trust me?”

Loki’s face softened briefly, fleetingly, before his brows rose and pinched together. “Trust you?” He let the wrist in Tony’s hand relax, the knife dropping to the cutting board slowly. And he laughed — once, with no humor. “You have been  _ lying _ to me. Only the gods know for how long. Explain to me, please, how I am to  _ trust _ you.”

If Loki had picked up that knife and stabbed Tony right in the center of the arc reactor, it would’ve hurt less, Tony thought. He leaned forward more, fingers tightening over his husband’s forearm. “Loki. I swear to you, everything I’m doing is to save this family.”

Tony jolted back when Loki dropped the knife with a clang, snatched his arm from his grasp. “Save us? Save us from  _ what _ , Anthony? Tell me.” Tony breathed heavily through his nose, jaw alternately clenching and working to speak, but nothing was coming out.  _ “Tell me!” _

He flinched, winced, threw up his hands. “Baby…”

"No. Do not ‘baby’ me. You ask me to trust you but you give me no reason to. Continue like this, Anthony, and this house will be more silent than you can bear." Shoving the half-sliced potato, knife, and cutting board away, Loki started to storm out. Tony grabbed for his wrist, keeping a hold on him even as Loki struggled to free himself.

“What is that supposed to mean?”

"Exactly what you think it does." He successfully yanked his arm back, but didn’t yet walk away. "How long do you presume I will put up with this? Do not for one second believe that I wouldn’t pack four suitcases and take the children with me when I go."

A gasp that sounded like a scream between them and Tony’s eyes watered at the thought. “You…you wouldn’t do that…”  _ Would you? _ he questioned silently.

Loki visibly fought his own tearing eyes. “Give me a reason not to.”

Tony’s heart had started to race and he could feel sweat starting to seep from his glands. “I need them. I need  _ you _ .” His eyes were locked on Loki’s as his husband took a step closer.

"Prove it. And let me help you with whatever you are going through."

Tony wanted to; oh god, how he wanted to. He just needed a little more time. “Loki, I’m not — Loki!” Loki clucked his tongue, sighing sharply as he turned away from Tony, who was hot on his heels following after him. "Loki, babe, please —"

”No!” He shouted, hair flying as he spun around. He fisted his hands at his sides, trying to calm himself, and glanced up toward the children’s rooms, waiting a beat to make sure they hadn’t heard. He looked at Tony with reddened, watery eyes. “I cannot keep beating my fists against the wall you’ve put between us, Anthony. I…” He groaned angrily and snatched up his car keys from the dining table.

Tony’s stomach dropped. "Loki, no, don’t. Please —"

“I will return later,” he said as he continued toward the door. He stepped out, but poked his head back in seconds later, cheeks damp as he looked toward Tony. “Just...remember to feed the children.” His words tumbled out before he walked out again.

Tony stared at the door for a several moments, the sound of the door slamming shut echoing in his ears. When his mind finally cleared, as much as it could, he moved into the kitchen to shut off the stove and numbly went about putting the vegetables in plastic containers and back into the refrigerator, and stashing away the potatoes to their rightful spot, throwing the half peeled and sliced one away. He was fighting tears the entire time.

After collecting himself, and splashing some water over his face, he went to the foot of the stairs, and called up to the kids, telling them to come downstairs. After a few seconds, he could hear their footsteps, Audi being the first to come down, a look of near fear on her face, followed closely by Jazz. Bash slowly trailed after them.

"Hi, Dad."

"Hey, Jazz. Everything shut off up there?" Two heads nodded; Bash frowned. "Good, then grab your sweaters or whatever, and let’s head out. I’m buying dinner tonight."

"Ooh, yay!" Sad mood vanished, Audi clapped and jumped down the last step to throw her arms around Tony’s waist. He chuckled and set a hand on her head.

"Isn’t  _ Pappa _ making dinner?” Jazz asked, as both he and Bash looking toward the kitchen.Tony forced himself to smile.

“He was, but turned out he wasn’t that hungry and I didn’t want him to make a huge dinner just for us. So I’m giving him the night off. Figure out what you want.”

"Pizza!" Audi shouted.

"Hamburgers!" Jazz countered. Tony watched Jazz and Audi run toward the door with a soft smile. They left it open as they headed to the car, arguing about what to eat. Tony looked back at Bash as he descended slowly, stopping at the last step.

"Where’d Pop really go, Dad?"

Tony never let his smile falter. “Truth is, your Aunt Natasha called; said she needed help with the new baby’s room or something. Don’t worry, he’ll be back.”

"I wasn’t worried about that.” One black eyebrow rose. “Were you?"

He forced out a laugh. “‘Course not. Come on.” He waved him down and moved to the door, making sure it was locked. Bash stared at him for a few seconds, with that same penetrating gaze as his father’s — not uncomfortable, at all — before he stepped down and started out.

Tony knew Bash didn’t buy anything he’d just said, but keeping a smile pasted across his lips, he headed out for dinner with his kids, hoping to a god he didn’t even believe in that Loki would be there when they returned home.

* * *

A few days later, Loki sat at his desk, doodling on a notepad, listening to Natasha as they discussed the dinner the two families would share to celebrate Sebastian’s acting debut. “I can make the roast and potatoes; just bring a vegetable.”

Natasha groaned lightly. _ “Fine. God, you guys sure do eat healthy. Do you want dessert? Clint can buy a cheesecake or something.” _

Loki chuckled and finished a doodle of a face that looked very much like Tony’s. “If you'd like. You're craving more sweets this time, aren't you? Along with the BBQ.”

_ “I am. Ugh. This does not bode well for my post-pregnancy body.” _

He grinned. “I'm sure you'll be fine, love. You've bounced back fairly quickly before. You hardly looked like you’d had a child after Alexander.”

_ “Yeah...but I'm older now. Almost forty,” _ she said with a heavy sigh.

_ “I beg your pardon. There is nothing wrong with being forty,” _ Loki sniffed, making Natasha laugh.

_ “Calm your tits, babe. You don't look a day over thirty-two. Fucking baby-faced forever.” _

_ “Hm,” _ Loki hummed, too used to Natasha’s infrequent vulgarity to be insulted.  _ “Anyway, you know Clint will love you no matter what you look like. He loves you unconditionally.” _

_ “Maybe...I wanna get my tubes tied,” _ she confessed quietly. Loki’s pencil paused on the notepad, his eyes flicked up.

“Really?”

Natasha chuckled softly on the other line.  _ “I don't know if I could do this again. I mean...tell me the truth: are you actually prepared for the poopy diapers and late-night feedings?” _

“Yes, I am,” he answered promptly, with a smile curving his lips. “Though with me, Natasha, I didn't know it until I had Sebastian, but I love caring for an infant.” He chuckled when Natasha scoffed.

_ “Of course you do, Loki,” _ she said flatly.  _ “You don't have to carry and birth the damn thing.” _

“I would if I could,” he argued.

_ “I believe that!” _ She laughed gaily and Loki rolled his eyes.

He waited until she calmed down to ask, “How does Clint feel about it?

She let out a long breath.  _ “Well, he — hold on. What?” _ Loki waited, listening to a muffled conversation between Natasha and Anastasia, who was looking for a lost shoe.  _ “Well, I didn’t take it, Ana… Then go look under Ro’s bed. Loki?” _

“I’m here.”

_ “Wait…” _ It was quiet for a few more moments before Natasha came back on the line.  _ “He doesn't want me to do it,” _ she finally said.  _ “'Just in case,' he says. He thinks I might regret it later.” _

“He has a point, Natasha. Perhaps you two simply need to be more careful.”

_ “Ugh, that is so easy for you to say, you damn homo.” _ Loki snorted.  _ “You don't have to worry about getting pregnant when Tony shoots his load into you.” _

“Oh, my god. I cannot believe you just said that,” Loki groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose. “But I suppose it is the truth.” Natasha made a smug noise and another brief pause passed between them.

_ “Do you guys still get tested?” _

“Gods, Natasha. You are so nosy!”

_ “I'm your best friend; I'm supposed to be,” _ she protested loudly. A beat.  _ “Well?” _

Loki sighed. “It is a part of our yearly physical, all right? Does that appease you?”

_ “Ha. It’s a good way to keep Tony in line, huh?” _

He feigned a laugh, thinking, if she only knew his fears when he and Tony awaited those results. “Very funny. Though I'm not sure why we still do it. I've not slept with anyone but Tony in nearly thirteen years. Well...except…”

_ “Hey.” _ The sharpness of Natasha’s tone made Loki go still.  _ “Do not go there, Loki. That wasn't the same and you know it.” _ He hummed quietly in response.  _ “Why are you thinking about that anyway?” _

“I'm not sure, to be honest,” he murmured, before frowning and almost chuckling. “Wait a  minute, aren't you the one who told me to tell Sebastian?”

_ “Yeah...and I still think you should. Just not now. Later, when he's a little older.” _

Loki turned in his chair, looking out the glass doors leading to the side of the house, leaning back in the wheeled desk chair. “Natasha, tell me the truth. Do you honestly think him knowing about that will do anything positive?”

_ “Yes, I do. Not now obviously, because he won’t understand. But when he's older, and ready to appreciate you as a man and as his father…? I think you should sit him down and explain it to him.” _

“I —” Catching a movement out of the corner of his eye, Loki looked toward the door, and Sebastian came into view. Sitting up, straightening, Loki waved him in. “Natasha, Sebastian’s just come in. I’ve got to run. I’ll talk to you later. Bring whatever dessert you want."

She laughed softly.  _ “I will totally bring the dessert I want. I might even bring one for the rest of you. Kiss the kids.” _

“You do the same. Bye, love.” Loki ended the call, smiling at Sebastian. “Hello, darling.”

Sebastian gave a weak smile as he lingered in the doorway. “Hey…”

Loki lifted a brow because Sebastian hadn't stepped into the room or said much more beyond that hello. And Loki could tell the smile on his face was a little forced. Belatedly, he wondered how long Sebastian had been standing in his doorway and what he might have heard. “Is everything all right?”

After a short hesitation, Sebastian stepped in and moved to sit in one of the chairs in front of Loki's desk. “I was actually gonna ask you the same thing,” he said finally. Loki’s lips curved faintly.

“Were you? About what?”

Sebastian focused his eyes on Loki. “You and dad.”

Playing it cool, Loki crossed his arms on the desk, shrugged his shoulders. “I’m not sure I know what you mean.”

Sebastian rolled his eyes as he practically groaned, “C'mon, Pop. I have eyes, you know.”

Trying to keep the mood light, Loki smiled a little wider. “You do. And they're a lovely viridian. So tell me, what do those beautiful eyes see?”

“You and dad avoiding each other.”

_ Shit _ . “No, darling, we’re not. It’s just a busy time, that's all. We’ve got your play coming up. Jameson has a concert on the horizon and Audrey’s end of the year program will be here before we know it. We’re all a little stressed at the moment. But...your father and I are just fine.”

Loki’s heart sank a little when all Sebastian did was sigh heavily, fluttering the dark strands of hair hanging over his face. “Y’know, this one time...Ana told me she could tell when her parents were fighting a lot.”

Loki’s brows drew together, but he fought not to chuckle, not wanting Sebastian to think he was laughing at him. “How’s that?”

“They stopped having sex.”

Loki barked out a short laugh, quickly cutting himself off. “All right. And what does that have to do with your father and I?”

Sebastian’s chin lowered, and the look he gave Loki had his lips parting in slight shock, knowing he had seen that incredulous look in the mirror before. “You guys aren't having sex. And you haven’t for awhile.”

“Mnh.” Loki grimaced, eyes closing as he fought back his embarrassment. “Sebastian,” he started, folding his hands together and steepling them under his chin, “I don't want you to think that you cannot come and talk to me about anything, because you can; anything at all. But, as open as I am, I will not discuss your father's and my sex life with you.”

“What sex life?”

“Watch it,” he snapped, aiming a long finger directly at his son. “That is a very adult subject and you are not an adult.”

“I'm not blind either, Pop.” Sebastian’s voice rose, and cracked. “You think I haven't noticed he's been sleeping in the lab lately? Or how you guys don’t talk like you used to. You don’t even hug anymore.”

Slowly losing his temper, and fighting it back, Loki rose and moved around the desk, pulling the other chair in front of his desk and twisting it around to sit and face Sebastian. “Darling, you know very well it is not a rare occurrence for your father to sleep in his lab. He often sleeps in the lab when he's working on a project.”

Sebastian rolled his eyes, pale red lips, a little fuller than Loki’s, pursed in a pout. “He's not working on anything important. He pretends to. But mostly he just sits there looking all sad all the time. What's wrong?” Loki parted his lips to answer, but Sebastian went on, lowering his voice. “Are you guys breaking up?”

Loki sighed softly, reaching out to cup Sebastian's cheek. “No, my love. There is nothing to be concerned about. All right?” Sebastian said nothing; simply staring.  The silent tension was broken suddenly when Audrey walked in, straight up to Loki, standing between him and Sebastian.

“ _ Pappa _ . I got a message for you.”

Loki sat back, having dropped his hand from Sebastian’s cheek, and grinned at his daughter. “Wonderful. But you forgot to knock again, my sweet girl.”

She instantly pouted. “The door was open.”

He chuckled, pinched her cheek, and laid a hand at her waist. “All right; just remember for next time. What is your message?”

“Oh.” Audrey straightened, eyes shooting up as if she was reading her words from the ceiling. “Daddy told me to tell you that you should just take Bash out to dinner b’fore his play 'cause he has a ‘bizness’ meeting and he won't be home for dinner.”

Loki face fell, but he quickly remembered Sebastian was watching him, and composed himself. “All right. Thank you, dear.”

“What, no reward?” She pushed out her bottom lip and held out a hand. Chuckling, Loki reached out to grab his jar of loose change from his desk.

“Will a quarter do, milady?”

“Uh-huh!” she nodded excitedly. Loki placed two shiny quarters in her palm and she gasped, dipping her head back to smile up at her much taller father, even sitting.

“Because you're so pretty.” She giggled and Loki leaned down. “Give us a kiss?” Still giggling, Audrey stepped forward and pressed a kiss to his cheek. “Thank you.”

“You're welcome!” She called over her shoulder as she skipped out.

Loki watched her go, smiling, then looked at Sebastian. Loki’s smile faded at his worried look. “I will talk to him.”

“Is he not going because of your non-fight?”

“We’re not fighting, son,” Loki reiterated, frustration lacing his tone. His eyes followed Sebastian as he got to his feet.

“Maybe not. But you are ignoring each other. And that's kind of worse,  _ Pappa _ .”

Sobering at the name, Loki swallowed the lump in his throat. “Get washed up for dinner, would you,  _ elsking _ ?” Sebastian nodded and walked out. Loki dropped his head into his hand once he was alone, his festering frustration and embarrassment and everything else, building inside him. Rising, he walked out of the den, intending to head to the kitchen to check that the food was almost ready. Instead, he headed to the basement.

He walked down the carpeted steps to find Tony at one of his workbenches. His husband looked up when he heard the footsteps on the concrete floor and Loki could see him square his shoulders.

“You’re sending Audrey with messages for me now?”

Tony glanced down briefly at the work on his table.  _ Hello, to you, too. _ He had expected Loki would want to talk to him after sending Audrey up with that message. He just figured Loki would wait until after dinner. “Well, you're not exactly my biggest fan these days, Loki. I'd rather not rock the boat, y'know?”

Loki crossed his arms, looking about the room, discreetly searching for any in progress projects. He saw none. “And now all of a sudden you've a business meeting to attend on one of the most important nights in your young son's life?”

Tony shrugged. “Yep,” he said unapologetically, tossing the tool in his hand to the table.

Loki’s jaw clenched. “It is his first play, Anthony.”

Tony’s eyes shot up, hard but weary. “I’m aware. And I will be there.” Loki remained still, brows drawn down and together over hard eyes. Tony scoffed. “Stop with the look of judgement, all right? It's the only time the client could give me a meeting. I'll meet you guys there. We'll take him out the next night if he wants.”

Loki huffed a sigh through his nose. “He has a performance the next night.”

“Then the night after!” Tony snapped, giving Loki a jolt. “Don't give me a guilt trip about this, Loki. I tried to get another night; I can't.”

“Please don't raise your voice at me,” he said calmly. Tony rolled his eyes and looked away. “Who is this client anyway?”

“Oh, what? Now we've gone from the silent treatment to Twenty Questions? It's a  _ client _ . Who is interested in clean energy. Does that pass your little test?” More hurt by the outburst than he’d care to admit, Loki’s eyebrows furrowed up and together. Tony looked up when it grew quiet, catching Loki's face. His lips almost curled. “What? Why are you looking at me like I just broke your heart?”

Lashes fluttering, trying not to blink so the tears prickling his eyes didn’t spill, Loki began to turn away. “Because, Anthony, in a very real way, you have.”

* * *

Audi called for Tony as she rushed down the steps to the basement — making him very nervous, even if they were carpeted — and ran straight to Tony. “Look, Daddy! I got two quarters!” She practically shoved her tiny little hand in his face to show him.

“All right, you're rich!”

She giggled, almost bending over with the effort. “You’re silly, Daddy. I'm gonna put it in my piggy bank.” She reached up on her tiptoes and pressed a kiss to his cheek.

“Okay!” he squeaked to match her excitement. He watched her run up the steps then turned back to his work table, to the arc reactor he was trying to rebuild. He had completely forgotten about it, found it in a box of scrap metal he dug through when he was bored, and was trying to make it a backup resource. He was having trouble concentrating, though, and had burnt his finger with the soldering iron. Again.

He heard Loki’s very first step at the threshold of the basement, and like a little shit, pretended he hadn’t heard him. And then they fought — in the way they fight. Bickering, snapping, and barking at each other. But Loki’s parting words...they cut him deep and after Loki had left, Tony dropped his head to the work table, wishing like hell this would all just be over.

“Dad?”

“What! Shit…” Tony shot up on the rolling stool he was sitting on and gasped, seeing Bash standing beside the table with wide, frightened eyes. He laughed to ease them both. “You popped up out of nowhere, kiddo.”

Moving hesitantly, Bash grabbed a similar stool and rolled it close to Tony. “What are you working on?”

Tony looked at the dead arc reactor sitting on the table and shrugged. “Oh...nothing really. What's up?”

“What's going on with you and Pop?”

Frowning, Tony pursed his lips and shook his head. “What are you talking about?” He jerked back a little when the younger let out a loud, disgusted groan.

“Oh, come on! Why are you and Pop trying to bullshit me on this?”

“Hey, watch your mouth,” Tony scolded, adding a weak smack to Bash’s leg. “Look, I don't know what you're talking about, Bash. Your father and I are fine.”  _ Fucking lies _ .

“Oh really? Then why are you sleeping down here?”

Admittedly, Tony was quite taken aback Bash had noticed. But then, when he really thought about it, he shouldn’t have been surprised. The kid was way too sharp for his own damn good. “Uh — 'cause I've been working on this stuff,” he motioned to the table. “And...waking your father up in the middle of the night isn't always the best idea. He tends to throw punches and kicks with those long-ass legs.” He tried a laugh to lighten the situation.

Bash only shook his head and said softly, “There's something wrong.”

Knowing he wouldn’t be able to convince Bash with his damn strong suspicions, Tony scooted closer, and clapped a hand to Bash's knee. “Look, kiddo, I’ll admit we're going through a bit of a rough patch, okay? But it’s no big deal; we'll get past it just like we have all the other bad patches.” He reached up, ruffled Bash’s hair then cupped and patted his cheek. “Don’t worry so much.”

Bash said nothing immediately, only looked at Tony with those curious, penetrating eyes. It made Tony a little nervous and he started to come up with more excuses in his head, but then Sebastian nodded. Whew. “Why do you have a meeting the night of my play?”

Tony pulled his hand back, frowning a little. “How did you hear about that?”

That brought a scowl quick to Sebastian's face. “I was in the room when Audi came in. Why? Weren’t you gonna tell me?”

_ Just like your father. _ Jesus. “Easy. It was a last minute thing, kiddo. I can't reschedule.”

“Are you gonna miss my play?”

Tony shook his head adamantly. “I will move mountains to be there, okay? I will see you in that play. I prom —”

“Don't promise.”

He scoffed softly, holding out his arms. “Why not?”

Bash lowered his head, lips pinching tightly. “'Cause you promised Jazz you would be at his concert. And…”

Guilt weighed heavily on Tony’s shoulders. “...And I broke that promise,” he finished. “You think I don’t want to be there, Bash?” He shrugged. “Well, I do," Tony said firmly. "I just...it’s something I gotta do.” It grew silent between them, and the look on Bash’s face only made Tony’s guilt more acute.

_ “Sebastian, Jameson, Audrey, Anthony! Dinner’s ready!” _

Bash looked away, toward the steps, then back to Tony. Tony jerked his head. “Go. I'll be up in a minute.” Bash nodded silently, returned the stool to its spot and quickly made for the steps.

It took a day for Victor Morgan to get in touch with his contact. And another for 'M' to contact Tony. Victor’s assertion that the woman kept tabs on the Stark family was only confirmed when Tony received the date and time to meet her. She knew about Sebastian’s play. She knew he and Loki were having problems. And she probably knew any little fight between them could break their already fragile foundation.

Fucking bitch.

_ “Daddy!” _

“Coming,” he called weakly to Jazz. Trudging his way up the steps, Tony schooled his face for when he faced his family, thinking to himself that if the lying didn’t do him in, the guilt certainly would.


	13. Sebastian's Debut and 'M's Unveiling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s the night of Sebastian’s acting debut. While Loki quick fixes a minor emergency for him, Sebastian uses the time for a short heart-to-heart with Loki. Across town in Hollywood, Tony sets out for his meeting with the mysterious ‘M.’

Loki was a nervous wreck.

The Stark home was in a tizzy; kids were yelling, clothes were flying, and Loki was growing more and more frustrated with his damn camera. Sitting in his office, he struggled to get the infuriating contraption connected to his computer so he could clear the pictures from Tony's birthday dinner. He needed the space for Sebastian's big stage debut. His sour temper stemmed from more than just the stubborn camera. His equally stubborn husband wasn't helping matters. In the last week or so, the tables had turned, and Tony was now the one avoiding Loki. At first he wondered if his not-so-veiled threat to walk out with the kids had pissed Tony off. Then he remembered that it was Tony who was in the wrong. And the two would petulantly walk around the house ignoring each other, less like the mature adults they should be and more like two teenaged boys.

It was killing him slowly.

_ "Pappa!" _

Loki huffed out a breath, relieved when the computer chimed as the camera finally connected and started to upload the pictures. "I’m in my office," he called back to Audrey. He grinned softly hearing her tiny feet on the wood floor of the kitchen as she raced to the room.

_ "Pappa!" _

Loki looked up at her. "I am right here, my sweet girl; there is no need to shout." He waved her over and she sprinted around his desk. "What can I do for you? What is this?" He took the item of clothing she was clutching in her hand and shoved at him.

"I wanna wear this instead."

Loki held up the long tunic meant to be worn with leggings. "Now, Audrey, we had this discussion. I told you, I would very much like you to wear a dress tonight."

She stomped her foot, hands fisting at her side, her cute face pinching into a pissy scowl. "I don't  _ wanna _ wear a dress!"

Loki tutted, lifted a finger to silence her. "Mind your volume, please. Listen to me," he said calmly, drawing her closer by the arms, giving them a soft squeeze. "This is a special night for your big brother and we're all going to a nice, fancy restaurant to celebrate. And we want to look nice, do we not?"

Audrey's lips formed a tight pout and she nearly glared at Loki from under her long black lashes. "I guess," she snapped.

Loki bit back a laugh, lips tilting up at the sides. "Audrey, that is not a very nice tone to use. Now, the weather is a little warmer out tonight. You'll be  _ too _ warm in that, I know it. I would rather not hear you complain all night. But,” he sighed, too exhausted to keep this fight up. “Why don’t you go on upstairs and find something you will be more comfortable in?"

Audrey paused, her eyes growing wide.. "I don’t hafta wear a dress?" Loki grinned and shook his head. “Yay!” Loki jolted as Audrey flung herself at him, tightly wrapping her arms around his neck. “Thank you,  _ Pappa _ !”

“You’re welcome, darling.” He pulled her off of him, keeping her close. “When we go shopping for school clothes this summer, let’s make sure we find fancy clothes you can wear that are not dresses, all right?” With a light touch, he brushed a rogue curl away and tucked it behind her ear. “I want you to be pretty, but I also want you to be comfortable.”

“‘Kay.” She pressed a kiss to his cheek and proceeded to bounce out of the room.

Loki watched her go, dreading the day she really would have a mind of her own. Absently, he made a mental note to ask Sif about places to take Audrey to shop. He started to save the one-hundred and thirty-six photos from the camera to their own folder — and secured the fifteen or so of just him and Tony later that night in a locked folder, sighing longingly at the smiles on their faces...when they got shots of their faces — and sat back in his chair, picking up his phone when it buzzed.

A text from Natasha confirmed their reservation at the Italian restaurant Sebastian had chosen. He was responding to her, to thank her, when a boyish shriek sounded from upstairs, making him pause a moment. When he heard voices begin to speak he went back to texting but thunderous footsteps coming down the stairs had him stopping again and he rose to step out of the room.

_ "Pop!" _

His heart stopped at Sebastian's desperate cry to him and rushed out to meet him. "Sebastian? What is it?"

Sebastian was dressed in his costume already: fitted black pants, black boots, and a flowy, white shirt, befitting a heroic prince. He was only missing the dark vest. But his face was twisted in a distressed frown, his usually pale cheeks tinged pink. "My sleeve!"

Loki's eyes darted to each of his arms. "Wh-what? What about them? I don't see anything amiss."

"This one!" Sebastian turned to show Loki where the sleeve had started to come apart at the seam on his right shoulder. "I was fixing my boots and I think it got caught on something and it ripped!"

Loki pressed a hand to his chest, relief allowing his heart to beat normally once more. He chuckled softly and cupped a hand to Sebastian's cheek. The best part of this role, Loki thought, was the fact that Sebastian had to comb back his hair. Loki was delighted to see his son's full face, his bright green eyes, no matter how odd it felt, as if he were looking at his own image. "Sebastian, my love, it's fine. I'll take care of it. Come on."

He motioned for Sebastian to sit on one of the stools at the kitchen counter as Loki moved to pull open one of the slimmer drawers. "But, Pop, it's ripped. It's ruined."

"No, it's not ruined. I can fix it, darling," he said distractedly, digging through the mess in the drawer. He really should make time to clean that out.

"Fix it? How?" Sebastian toyed with the flap baring his shoulder.

Loki pulled a clear box from the drawer, smiling triumphantly at Sebastian. "Ta-da." He gave the sewing kit a shake and set it down to pull out a needle and a spool of white thread to match to the shirt. "Off with your shirt, my boy."

Sebastian stared, dumbfounded, as Loki cut off a long string of the thread and looped it through the eye of the needle. He started to pull the torn shirt carefully over his head, so as not to rip it further. "You know how to sew?"

Loki placed the needle between his teeth and glanced at Sebastian with a small grin curving up one side of his mouth. "Well, who else was going to darn my socks while I was at school?" he mumbled around the needle as he tied the loose ends in a knot. "Your grandmother was in Washington, I was in Switzerland. And I had to constantly mend your uncle's things. The big oaf was always getting holes in his shirts and splitting his pants."

Sebastian sat, quietly listening, watching Loki turn the shirt inside out and start to mend the tear. Loki worked diligently, sensing Sebastian was watching him closely. His eyes narrowed a little as he worked and he realized with a sigh that he should probably get his eyes checked.

Screw getting older.

"Can I ask you something?"

Loki's eyes flicked up at Sebastian's softly asked question and nodded. "Of course, you can." He looked back down at his work and waited.

"How old were you when you had your first kiss?" The needle paused halfway through the material. Loki looked at his son, dark brows furrowed over glinting eyes.  "Don't ask," Sebastian warned. "Just answer. Please?"

Loki agreed silently and pushed the needle through, pulling it up as he answered, "My very first kiss, I was, oh...ten or eleven, I believe."

"Jeez," Sebastian mumbled, his eyes growing wide as he looked away. He looked up at Loki again, mischievously biting his lip. "Boy or girl?"

Loki lowered the shirt and fixed Sebastian with a dry look. Sebastian failed at hiding a smile and shrugged. "It was a girl,  _ vet alt _ ." Sebastian snickered. Loki grinned wistfully at the fact that he had just called his son a know-it-all in his mother's native tongue, just as she had once called him. "Her name was Elizabeth. And I was very excited about the whole thing until I learned that, as usual, it was just a ruse to get closer to Thor."

"Huh? What do you mean?"

Loki chuckled lowly. "She had a crush on your uncle and thought that by kissing me it would make him jealous and want to be with her."

"Did it work?"

"No," he replied with a laugh and shake of his head. "Unfortunately for her, Thor was extremely infatuated with an older girl who lived in our neighborhood. He didn't even know who she was when I told him." Loki snuck a glance at Sebastian as the boy propped his cheek on his hand and made a soft, thoughtful sound. "Sebastian?" He waited for those soft green eyes to lift to his, but Sebastian only hummed in question. "Have you kissed Anastasia?"

Startled, wide eyes lifted to him and Loki grinned affectionately. Sebastian sighed, rolling his eyes. "Not with my mouth open, okay?" he reluctantly admitted.

Slim black brows lifted high over older, wiser green eyes, surprise making his jaw go slack. "How many times have you kissed her?"

"I dunno," he jerked his bare shoulder. "Lost count."

Loki chuckled. "Oh, really? So is she your girlfriend now?"

"No!" Sebastian shouted, shooting up on the stool.

Loki laughed at how absolutely horrified Sebastian sounded at the thought. "Do you mean to tell me you just kiss her whenever you feel like it? That's not very gentlemanly of you."

"Well..." Sebastian sighed, his cheeks growing bright red. "How is she supposed to be my girlfriend when she's at another school?" he mumbled. "I've kissed other girls and...well, Ana's just like...practice."

" _ Practice? _ " Now Loki was the horrified one. "Sebastian Daniel Stark. You cannot treat the girl like that. Have you been taking advice from your father?"

"I'm not doing anything wro—" His words dropped off and he looked at Loki, his words registering. "What?"

Loki chuckled and waved it off. "Nothing. Sebastian..." He lowered the shirt to the counter, shifting his weight to his other foot, leaning closer to Sebastian.

"Pop, it's not what you think," he rushed to say. He shrugged again, rubbing at the back of his neck in a nervous gesture Loki recognized as his own. "It was  _ her  _ idea anyway."

"Is that so? It was her idea for you two to use each other as kissing practice?" Sebastian nodded solemnly. With a sigh, Loki picked up his sewing again. "Even so,  _ elskling _ , that's not the most chivalrous thing to do."

"Maybe. But." Sebastian's shoulders hunched a little, his cheeks still stained dark red. "She said she wants be ready."

"For...?"

"For when…" Sebastian's face crumpled as he winced and looked away. When he spoke again, his words were low and mumbled. "When she has her first  _ real _ kiss."

Loki paused again, lifting his head to eye Sebastian closely. "What do you mean her first  _ real _ kiss? What have you been doing to her up to now?"

"Nothing!" His voice was a near squeak. "I mean..." Sebastian's leg had begun to bounce incessantly against the stool. " _ Real _ . Y'know...with...tongue." He whispered the last word.

Trying not to laugh, Loki's brows drew together and he brought a hand to his face, covering the grin that curved his lips, and let out a long breath. "Oh, my dear boy. If you cannot even say the word aloud then perhaps you should not be attempting to use it in your efforts at wooing."

Sebastian made a face. "My what?"

"You know very well what I said. Stop using Anastasia as practice." He returned to finishing up the mended seam. "Unless you're enjoying it." He grinned softly again, concentrating on the work of his needle, but Sebastian's silence caught his attention. When Loki flicked his eyes up again, Sebastian was chewing a hole into his bottom lip. Loki reached out and tugged on his chin to get him to stop. "What is it?"

Sebastian stared at him for a few seconds. Loki's eyes dropped to his hands, in his lap, fingers twisting and snapping together.  _ Just like Anthony _ , he thought with a small smile. "Um...your first real kiss, when was...?"

Loki waited for the end of the question but it was clearly not coming. His lips were still curved as he cut the thread from the needle and started to tie the ends into a knot. "Thirteen," he finally answered. "And before you ask, it was a boy."

Sebastian half-smiled, bashfully lowering his head. "What...what was it like? Was it different when you kissed a girl...with...y'know…?"

Loki closed up the sewing kit and faced Sebastian, attempting to keep his expression from being too hard. "Where are all these questions coming from?"

Back to his old self, Sebastian scoffed, loudly, as he rolled his eyes and crossed his arms. "Nowhere. You said I could ask you things!"

"And you can,  _ min kjærlighet _ ." Loki cupped his hand around Sebastian's neck, giving him a small shake to bring his face back around so he could look into his eyes. "But, Sebastian...you are only twelve years old."

"I'll be thirteen in two and a half months," he muttered, clearly embarrassed by Loki's affections. "Same age you were when you had your first real kiss. With another  _ boy _ !"

"Yes, I know," Loki sighed and dropped his hand only to curl a finger under Sebastian's chin, lifting his face until their eyes met. "My point is, you are still young. All of that will come in time. There is no need to rush it. All right?" Reluctantly, Sebastian nodded. "Here." Loki handed over the mended shirt.

Sebastian inspected the flawlessly sewn seam, almost wondering if he'd imagined the tear at all, and jumped off the stool. "Wow. Thanks, Pop."

Loki hummed in response and put the sewing kit back in its drawer. "Sebastian?"

Halfway out of the room already, he looked back at his father, sighing impatiently when Loki beckoned him over. "Yeah?"

"Yes," he corrected. Sebastian nodded and Loki leaned an arm on the counter. "You said Anastasia suggested this...practicing of kissing so that she would be ready for her first open-mouthed kiss?" Blushing viciously, Sebastian nodded. "I won't press for details, or point out how that makes absolutely no sense whatsoever, but…" Sebastian breathed out a short laugh, his nose scrunching as he did. "Does that mean  _ you _ already have?"

"Oh my god,  _ Pappa _ ." Sebastian whispered the words as his eyes lowered and squeezed shut.

"It's just a question,  _ elskling _ ." He nearly raised a hand to brush his fingers through that jet black hair, but knew that wouldn't help with Sebastian's embarrassment. He was almost a teenager now, and Loki's affectionate ways with him were starting to irk, he could tell.

"Yes, okay? I have kissed someone with my mouth open," he muttered, keeping his gaze on his feet, and shifting his weight from foot to foot in an odd little dance.

"...Boy or girl?"

A giggle-snort escaped through Sebastian's lips just before he buried his face in his freshly-mended shirt. "A girl!" he shouted, his voice muffled in the material.

"All right, all right. I'll stop now." He gave his word when Sebastian peeked up at him. "Have you spoken to your father about any of this? Asked him for advice or...anything?"

Sebastian stiffened a little as he straightened; minutely, but Loki caught it, not letting on that he had. "No," he answered matter-of-factly. Loki's brow twitched but he said nothing, waiting for Sebastian to elaborate. The way the mask slid over Sebastian's face — how he went from a laughing, bright-eyed boy to a serious teenager — concerned Loki; not only because the subject of Tony could do that, but also because it was obvious whom Sebastian had learned that from. "How could I? He's never around anymore. Not since he started avoiding you."

Before Loki could respond Sebastian turned, headed out of the room, and Jameson and Audrey came running down the stairs, distracting him, shouting over each other about a missing sock and too tight shoes.

He wouldn't get the chance to ask Sebastian about it; before he knew it, he was sitting in the school's auditorium, with his best friend and their families, anxiously awaiting the play's opening. He kept his phone firmly in hand, on silent, routinely checking it for a reply to his text messages and phone calls, and eyeing the door, anxiously awaiting for Tony to make an appearance.

When the lights went down and the play began, the seat beside him was still empty.

* * *

Tony had been on edge all day.

He had snapped at Pepper, inadvertently, during a conference call, and after it was over, she hung up on him before he could apologize. Then refused to take his calls for the rest of the day. Not in the mood to dwell on it, Tony had holed himself up in his lab, finding reasons to hammer things down or set things on fire. The fire-setting turned out to not be such a good idea. He'd needed to get out his aggression. He couldn't meet with 'M' feeling angry and resentful. Though that was all he felt toward the woman. Their meeting was set for seven o'clock, which gave him plenty of time to make Bash's eight o'clock curtain call. Barely. But, come hell or high water, he would make it. He wasn't expecting this meeting to last very long anyway.

He changed from what he called his "lab casual" clothes — a band tee, worn and ripped jeans, and tennis shoes — into a pair of cleaner, sleeker jeans, a blue-button up under a light gray sweater, and kept his comfortable tennis shoes on, then left his office at Stark Industries.

Avoiding heading to what was certainly a madhouse at home, Tony drove out to Hollywood, to the designated meeting spot: the Chateau Marmont. Why she chose a swanky hotel, where undoubtedly paparazzi would be camped out, waiting to catch the latest hot celebrity going in or coming out, he didn't know. But he could make an educated guess. She wanted him to be seen. Photographed even.

As Tony chucked his keys to the excessively-pierced valet, he hurried inside, slipping past the few men with cameras hanging around their necks, focusing elsewhere. Only a flash or two caught him from the side and the back of his head. He made his way to the restaurant, walking directly to the maître'd's station, where a tuxedoed man stood, his hair slicked down to his head, his pencil moustache waxed to its thinnest.

_ "Bonsoir, monsieur," _ he greeted before Tony could speak. Tony breathed a small chuckle. The French made him think of Loki, which made him think of Bash, which reminded him he had somewhere else to be.

"Hi. Tony Stark. I'm supposed to meet —"

"Ah,  _ oui _ . Your party is waiting for you. This way,  _ s'il vous plaît _ ." The man lifted a leather-bound menu from a hidden space beside him, pivoted sharply and started to lead Tony through the main floor of the restaurant.

Tony's eyes darted around the dimly lit room as he followed the maître'd. Familiar faces registered, but he was much too distracted to do much more than give a nod here, a ghost of a smile there. The maître'd paused to push open a door and motioned to a table on the patio. Tony stepped out, quickly noting that the patio was empty, but for the aforementioned table.

And the veiled woman sitting at it, with two large, black-suited men behind her.

Tony sat slowly, trying uselessly to peer through the black veil covering the woman's face.  _ Damn it _ , he thought, unable to see anything but the protrusion of her nose. His heart thudded heavily in his chest, making the arc reactor hum just a little louder when the woman lifted a hand, flicking her fingers in some kind of signal. The two bodyguards moved then, one to stand just outside the door, the other to stand inside.

"Hello, Tony. I wasn't sure you were gonna make it."

A memory clicked in his mind. A voice, sugary sweet and dripping with the notes of the South. Lacing his fingers together, Tony settled back into the chair, his brow furrowing determinedly. "Lost your accent, huh," he pointed out.

She chuckled, fluttered her hand in that way females do. "I couldn't take the chance you would recognize my voice that night, now could I?"

"That suggests I knew you before that night."

She feigned a gasp, badly, Tony thought, and laid a hand over her ample chest, hidden beneath what looked like a form-fitting black blazer. "It hurts me, Tony, that you don't remember me after all that time we spent together." Deliberately slow, as she spoke, the woman lifted her veil and sent Tony a brilliant smile.

He watched her intently, taking in each inch of skin as it was revealed: a subtly pointed chin, overly painted red lips, a slim — altered, if Tony's eye was accurate — straight-edged nose, and finally, bright green eyes, glittering with smugness at him. His lips parted to speak, to deny knowing anything about her, but something in those eyes sparked recognition. He knew those eyes. He filed back through his memories, faces spinning through his mind's eye, until it hit him, and he slowly realized who she was. His skin ran cold, and he could have sworn his heart stopped beating for a moment.

"...Amy? Amy Armstrong?"

Those red lips curved in a wicked grin. "The name is Moira now. Moira Khan."

A fiery ball of anger burned in Tony's chest, had him simmering across the tiny table from her. "Different name; same conniving bitch," he spat.

Moira set her jaw but said nothing, but a subtle hand signal not unnoticed by Tony, likely had her man standing down. "Is that any way to speak to an old friend, Tony?"

"You're not my friend. Now what the hell is this? Some stupid revenge for getting your ass arrested all those years ago? They shouldn't have let you out."

"Oh," she mock pouted. "Revenge? Revenge would have been simply going to the papers with the hottest story of the century: My Wild Night with Tony Stark." She aimed a dark look at him, eyes glinting. "A sure fire end to your marriage."

Tony's face showed nothing, but his heart was racing with indignation, and maybe a small amount of apprehension. His stomach dropped when she mentioned his marriage, but he hid it all with a scoff. "Bullshit. Loki would never believe that."  _ Yes, he would _ . "If it's not about revenge, what is it? Still pissed I chose a man over you?"

Moira breathed a chuckle, rolled her eyes away, but Tony could tell his jab got to her. "Oh, Tony...I've moved beyond all of that." She brought her eyes back to him and a cold shiver ran through him. "What I want...is to  _ destroy _ the Stark name. I want you to be left alone and decimated. I want your money. And I want your company."

It took a lot of effort, and the reminder that there was a large man probably carrying a gun standing behind him, for Tony not to shove the table at the stupid bitch. "Why?"

Moira’s green eyes, so different from Loki's or Bash's or even Natasha's, remained locked on his. And after a moment, she shrugged. "Why not?"

Tony scoffed again, masking his true feelings. "You think you're the first person to want to bring Stark Industries down? You're not. And I know you're smarter than just juvenile payback, Am — Moira. Why?"

Pursing her lips, she watched him for a moment. "You are the bane of my existence, Tony Stark. Ever since you were dragged into my life twenty years ago, it's been one setback after another."

He made another derisive noise. "Blame Odin for that. He's the one that brought you to me. And what the hell are you talking about anyway? Before that night in New York, I hadn't set eyes on you since Natasha kicked your ass in my dorm room."

This time it was Moira who chuckled bitterly. "That day was only the beginning of my problems."

"What, you didn't like it in prison?" He flinched only a little when Moira bolted up, palms slapping down to the arms of her chair.

"I spent three goddamn years in that godforsaken place! And because he had connections, you think that rat bastard Odin did any time or was even reprimanded? No! I took the fall for everything!"

Calmly, Tony waited for her to stop yelling, and cocked a brow. "Are you expecting me to have pity on you?" He nearly smiled when she curled her lips in a quiet snarl. "I never thought of you again after that day, Moira. Not my fault you couldn't let go. And blackmailing me for the money Odin didn't give you? Not gonna fly," he said with a shake of his head.

Moira seemed to have composed herself well enough, and sat back, crossing her legs. "You really think that's what I'm doing? Odin owed me a few measly thousand to break you and that skinny twink up. I want ten million  _ each _ for what I've got."

Tony couldn't hide his agitation and his spine stiffened. "He's not a twink. And they're not worth that much."

"Liar." She smirked.

His jaw clenched. "Who'd know better than me?"

"Justin Hammer." Moira must have seen the shock register on his face because she couldn't hide her triumphant smile.

"...What?" She bobbed her brows smugly and Tony frowned deeply. "What are you — you're full of shit. Hammer's dead."

Moira's bottom lip pushed out, feigning a pout. "Yes. Unfortunate, that."

"How'd you know Hammer?"

She steepled her fingers in front of her mouth before lacing them together under her chin. "Well, that's an interesting story, actually. You see, my late husband and I, not long after we married, decided we wanted to expand our little empire. We were looking to invest our money into a business that was, let's say, a little less underground."

"You're husband was trying to go straight."

Surprise flickered across her eyes briefly before she sneered, "Who told you that? S.H.I.E.L.D.?"

"No," he answered flatly. "A friend of yours."

Her façade faded for a moment. "We have no  _ friends _ in common, Tony. But if you're referring to that Irish whistleblower you met with...? Well…" She grinned sadistically. "He's been taken care of." A chill settled over Tony. And, for some reason, a spark of anger. "For lack of a better explanation, yes, my husband was trying to legitimize his business dealings. We had put some feelers out and heard about some companies looking for investors. But the one that caught our attention was the one with big plans. Plans, specifically, to take over Stark Industries."

Anxiety slowly washed over Tony, as memories he'd thought he had long ago purged from his mind flooded his mind. Recollections of a standoff with a psychotic lawyer in a spacious Greenwich apartment, a surprise proposal, a little boy's voice shaking and scared behind a locked door. He remembered the sound of Loki's already badly beaten body hitting the floor after a shot rang out, the crippling fear that he'd lost the love of his life right then and there. She couldn't have known about all of that, he thought, trying to calm himself down.

Moira continued on as if she hadn't noticed his reaction, "It just couldn't be more perfect, honestly. So we put everything we had into Hammer Industries, and for a good solid year, we planned and plotted and waited for the perfect time to step in." Tony struggled not to show any emotion as he listened, but the edges of the arms of the chair dug into the skin of damp palms as he gripped onto them for dear life. "There was just one tiny complication we hadn't planned on…"

Fearing he knew exactly what — or who — she meant, he asked the question anyway. "What was that?"

"We didn't expect Loki to make a return." A sharp breath sounded across the table. "Of course, it actually worked to our advantage." She smirked at him and it made his skin crawl. "He was a good distraction for you. And it only made it better that our  _ lawyer _ had an 'in' thanks to your future brother-in-law."

Tony froze, his fingers easing the grip on the chair, a shiver running down his spine. "Who…? Your…your lawyer was…?"

"Thanos Anderson. Mmhmm!" Moira nodded excitedly, like he had just made her day. "Small world, isn't it?" Tony could hear his own heartbeat pounding in his ears. He fought, desperately, to steady his breathing through his rising panic. Moira's brow furrowed, her face scrunched in what was probably supposed to be concern, but Tony could see it was fake. "Granted, we did lose a bit of control over him. To be honest with you, he was only supposed to keep Loki torn between you and him; like I said, a distraction. But…I guess he got a little possessive with the guy, huh?"

Under the panic and rising bile, Tony was outraged, fighting the urge to leap across the short distance and strangle the woman. "He fucking  _ raped _ him, Moira! What the fuck is wrong with you?"

She pressed a hand to her chest, almost affronted, and lifted a brow. "Well,  _ I _ didn't tell him to do that. He wasn't very good at keeping us updated. Besides, everything fell apart after we discovered he had killed Justin and gotten himself killed.  _ So  _ inconvenient."

"He deserved a lot worse than a knife in the gut." Tony nearly spat the words, through clenched teeth, fighting not to be sick right then and there.

"I'm not condoning what he did, Tony. I kind of hoped Loki would have left you for him. Would've made  _ me  _ happy, at least. But Thanos kind of ruined that idea, so…" She shrugged, throwing up her hands. "But moving on with the story…" She flicked her hand, as if to literally brush the subject aside. "Losing everything…it was rough for my husband. Put a lot of unnecessary stress on him. And once again, everything worked out for Tony Stark. You still had your company, your money, your boyfriend. Everything just always comes together for you, doesn't it?"

Tony shook his head sadly, pushed a hand up and over his damp forehead. "My life is not perfect, okay?"

"Oh, I know." His eyes flicked up. "I had to keep an eye on you, Tony. You see, we did lose a lot of money in that investment. But I wouldn't have survived this long if I didn't know how to plan for a rainy day. Or how to keep a friend loyal. So after the tragic death of my husband, I set out to continue what I started."

With all the information being thrown at him, it was amazing Tony could still do some minor number crunching. "You've been planning this for over a decade? Is that what you're telling me? Seriously?"

"Don't make it sound so petty, Tony. People have killed for less."

"Look…" Swiping at a bead of sweat trickling down from his temple, Tony sat up, shifting forward in his seat. "Let's stop this stupid dance, okay? I have somewhere to be."

"Hmm," Moira hummed, examining her nails closely. "You're not going to make it to your kid's play, Tony."

Temper flaring, Tony's hands balled into fists. "Oh, yeah? What makes you so sure?"

The smile Moira sent him was almost sweet; it was her eyes that made it sinister. "Dear, sweet Tony," she cooed patronizingly. "If you don't leave in the next…" She made a show of glancing at her watch. "Five minutes? You won't make it."

"I could just get up and leave, Moira," he pointed out. But the softness of his voice betrayed his conviction.

"I'd certainly love to see you try, honey."

Scowling hard at her, Tony started to rise only to have a heavy hand land on his shoulder and force him back down. He shook the guard's hand off, huffing indignantly. "What the hell do you want, Moira?" he demanded. "You want ten mil for each reactor? Fine. I'll get the money for you. But, Christ, why do you have to mess with my family?"

"What part of me wanting to ruin the Stark name do you not understand?" She chuckled, like it was all a little game. "I told you, Tony, I've been watching you for a long time now. I  _ know _ just how shaky that ground your marriage is on is. I also know you haven't told Loki anything about what's happened between us."

" _ Nothing _ happened between us!"

"Oh…" She angled her head, laughed again. "I'm going to have to disagree with you on that, sweetheart." Tony's eye twitched at the name, but she completely disregarded it. "You can deny it all you want, but I'm the only one who really knows what happened."

Tony remained tight-lipped. He knew she was right; he couldn't deny they had spent a night together, even if he would call her a liar to his dying day.  _ You should have told Loki. You should have been honest _ . "You're a piece of shit, Moira," he whispered harshly, unable to put any force in the statement.

Her shoulders lifted as she giggled. "Maybe. But I didn't cheat on my husband."

"You probably killed him," he muttered mostly to himself, dropping his head into his hands.

"Art. Drink." She crossed her legs, sitting up a little straighter in her seat as she made the order. The man standing behind Tony alerted the guard inside and moments later a bottle of champagne and two filled flutes were set on the table between them.

"What is this?" Tony asked sitting up again. "What do you think this is — a dinner date? Don't romanticize any of this, Moira. Because at the end of the day all you are is a former prostitute trying to blackmail me and break up my family."

The glass of champagne Moira had at her lips was lowered without one sip being taken. Stone-faced, she leaned forward to set the glass on the table and cleared her throat as she sat back. "Let me correct you on a couple of things there, Tony. I wasn't  _ just _ a prostitute, okay? I was a high-class escort. I was paid top dollar for my company. I know things about the men who run this country, the top of the top of the A-list, figureheads, and foreign dignitaries that the American public would kill to know."

"I think you forget who my father was. Or my father-in-law, for that matter. Or who I've been working with for almost ten years. You may have gotten it from the horse's mouth, but I know what you know. And I don't give a shit. Write the fucking book if you want and get your damn money."

Moira breathed a quiet chuckle. "Why bother, when I can just get my hands on  _ your  _ money?" Her lips curved further at Tony's glare. "And let's be clear about another thing: I'm not trying to blackmail you. I'm conducting a transaction. Twenty million dollars and you get your reactors back. It's simple."

"It's not simple, you crazy —" He stopped himself before calling her something insulting and had to swallow back tears. "You are threatening my marriage, my relationship with my children, and my livelihood. It's not  _ simple _ when you're doing it all for money and dangling this goddamn threat of running to the press about a night I can't even remember. You're sick."

With a sigh and roll of her eyes, Moira reached for her champagne and sipped. "The only thing I'm sick of is your whining. Jesus, what did Loki do to you? You had so much going for you twenty years ago." She clucked her tongue in obvious disapproval. "So let's break this down. You have one week to get me the money. If you don't get it to me in time, I sell the reactors to the highest bidder."

Tony swallowed thickly, his eyes lowering somewhere toward his feet. He would have to tell Loki now. He had no choice. "Fine."

"Wonderful."

"Wait." Moira paused halfway out of her seat and lowered again. "I'm gonna pay for this; in more ways than even you can imagine. Maybe you keep trying to take my company — and, personally, I'd really like to see you try to take on Pepper. And maybe…maybe  I lose Loki." The words were like acid in his mouth. "But you have to leave my kids out of this. They've done nothing."

"Aw...so sweet…"

"I'm serious, Moira." Tony’s voice was stronger now, firmer. He needed her to know just how serious he was. "Fucking with me is one thing. Fucking with Loki...you're digging your own grave. But you fuck with my kids...I will come after you with everything I have."

Moira stared at him expressionless for a moment before her lips curved in a sly smirk. "Well, now...see, that's just the point, Tony. I told you: I want to ruin the Stark name. They carry your name. Loki carries your name." Resting an arm over her leg, Moira leaned forward. "And once I'm done with you, there will be nothing left for you to fight me with."

Tony watched through pooling eyes as Moira stood, smoothed down her black skirt, and smiled almost sweetly at him. She twisted up her arm, checked her watch again.

"You've missed curtain. Why don't you stick around? Have a drink or even order up some...lasagna maybe."

Tony's lips trembled and he looked away, refusing to let any tears fall in front of her.

"It's on me." She reached out to pinch Tony's cheek, but he tore his face away, out of her reach, a soft hiss sounding between his teeth. Moira chuckled and finished off her champagne. "One week, Tony. One. Week."

Tony wasn't sure how long he sat there on that patio by himself, fighting back the tears that he would have likely drowned in. But by the time he forced himself up, and walked through the restaurant, and got behind the wheel of his car, and started the drive back to his house, he knew Sebastian's play was over.


	14. Déjà Vu

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony returns home to face Loki about missing Bash's play, and has to fight through yet another crisis, before he faces Bash himself. Later, Natasha gets overwhelmed by Loki’s latest revelations and almost loses control of her emotions.

Pressing the button to lift the garage door, To ny pulled his car into the driveway, jerking the sleek black vehicle to a sudden stop. Loki had parked his car extremely crookedly across the center of the garage, leaving no room for Tony to park his own. Sighing heavily, he banged his head back against the headrest. “Jarvis, where is he?”

_ “In your bedroom. But, sir…” _

“Not now. Fuck,” he muttered to himself, shutting off the engine.

Taking his time, Tony locked the car and closed the garage door as he walked out to the front of the house, choosing instead to enter the house through the front door. It was eerily quiet and dark on the downstairs level as he stepped in; it made him wonder where the kids were — they were never this quiet. That must have been what Jarvis was trying to tell him, he thought absently. Taking a deep breath, Tony climbed the steps to the second level. He frowned as he reached the top, seeing that the kids’ rooms were also dark and quiet, their doors wide open.  _ Were they even home? _ Creeping slowly toward his own bedroom door, slightly ajar and spilling a slim beam of light into the hallway, Tony could hear Loki moving about.

Stepping up to it, he reached out to push it open...and felt his entire being go cold. For sitting there, on their bed, wide open and already more than half-filled, was Loki’s suitcase.

Loki chose that moment to step out from the walk-in closet with a hanger in each hand, freezing when he noticed Tony standing at the door. Tony inhaled in the dead silence between them, but it sounded more like a gasp. Loki’s eyes darted to the suitcase and back to Tony, and a moment later, he moved, crossing to the bed to set one shirt beside the suitcase, pulling the other off it's hanger before folding it and setting it inside with the others.

“What are you...” Tony's voice shook as he stepped tentatively into his own bedroom. “What are you doing?”

He saw the muscles in Loki’s jaw clenched and those pale red lips were tight as he muttered, “What does it look like I'm doing?”

Panic was making his breath come faster as Tony moved to the foot of the bed. “Stop.”

“No.” Loki gave a sharp shake of his head.

Lunging forward and around the bed, Tony slammed his hands down over Loki's on top of his clothes. “Stop!”

“No!” Loki yelled the single word in Tony’s face, causing him to jerk back. This close Tony could see deeply into Loki’s eyes; red-rimmed and pupils blown wide. He hadn’t seen this level of anger in Loki since the fight with Odin in his dorm all those years ago. Everything in that face, his eyes, his chin, his lips, trembled, and Tony couldn’t decipher if that was a sign of his anger or his effort to hold everything back. “I told you." His voice was strained, as if someone was holding his throat in a vice-like grip. "I told you I would not put up with this much longer. Tonight was the last straw.”

Tony reached for Loki’s wrists, gripping tight even as he tried to fight him off. “No, Loki, you don't understand. I —”

“You're right; I don't understand, Anthony.” He shifted, fully facing Tony now. “I don't understand how you could so easily miss such an important night in your son's life.” His eyes filled, and he blinked rapidly as he pulled away from Tony and moved to his dresser. “But then, he's not really your son, is he? So why should you care...”

“That’s not fair! Sebastian is every bit my son as he is yours!” Tony jolted again as Loki whipped around.

“Then where were you tonight? Do you have any idea how devastated he was when he learnt you'd not been there for him?”

“I swear, Loki, I wanted to be there.” He choked back a sob, hands pressed together in front of him, almost pleading with Loki. “I did! I  _ tried _ , but—”

“Not hard enough!”

“Loki.” His name was a whisper on Tony’s lips. But Loki wanted none of it. Pushing past him, Loki continued to pack, with Tony trailing behind. “Babe, listen to me.”

“No.” He slammed a stack of briefs into the suitcase then faced Tony again, and Tony stumble back a step. “For months I have been trying to get you to talk to me and you have refused. And now — because you know you have fucked up — you want to talk?  _ No _ .”

_ Shit, he swore _ , Tony thought to himself, mind working, trying to find the right words to get him to stop and listen. “Loki, please.” He looked at the suitcase again and something twisted viciously in his gut. “Where are you even gonna go?”

“To my mother's.”

For a second, Tony stopped breathing. “You would go all the way across the country just to get away from me?  _ Again? _ Wh...what about the kids?”

“I will be taking them with me.”

Stomach cramping painfully, Tony doubled over, throwing a hand out to steady himself against the bed. “Loki…”

Loki continued to pack, arranging his clothes neatly as he spoke, flatly. Emotionless. Empty. “We will stay there until I can figure out another place for us.”

Tony tried to steady his breathing as he fell to the bed with a thump, clutching at his stomach. “You can't…” The rest of the sentence tapered off as he focused on Loki’s face. He flinched when those dark eyes flicked over to him.

“Can't I?”

A thick lump lodged in Tony’s throat. “You — you can't take them from me. You can't leave me again. Please,” he whispered. “Just let me explain.” Tony stiffened as Loki stopped his movements, straightened from his arranging.

“I don't feel the need, nor do I have the energy to sit and listen to you explain about your mistress.”

Tony blinked sharply, some tears spilling, as he shook his head, in both confusion and denial. “What...I don't have a mistress. Jesus, Loki. Is that what you really think?” He dropped his head in his hands, swiping at his eyes.

“Oh no? You’ve been acting off for weeks. You’re almost a stranger to me, Anthony. You don’t want to spend any time with us. You’re keeping  _ something _ from me. If I’m wrong, then tell me: where were you tonight? While I was with our children, watching Sebastian excel in his play, where were you?”

Tony struggled to catch his breath, wiping at his damp cheeks, before looking up to answer in a thick voice, “The Chateau Marmont.”

Loki went still and several tense moments passed before he spoke. “Why...what were you doing at a hotel?”

Tony scrubbed his hands hard over his face, sniffling before finally looking up at Loki with wet, tired eyes. “Give me an hour? Please?” he asked through a broken voice. A spark of hope flickered in him when he noticed Loki softened — minutely. “Just hear me out and...” He let out a breath, closing his eyes for a moment. “And if you still want to leave…I won't stop you.”

* * *

 

Loki's movements were rushed and jerky, moving about the bedroom he had shared with Tony for the last six years, as he packed his suitcase. His hands were shaking and the sense that he had been here before, had done this before, was making him feel dizzy with nausea. He hoped he would be out of the house before Tony returned. He wasn't sure what a meeting between the two of them would be like in his current state of emotion.

He was livid. A small part of him thought he  _ might _ be overreacting. And maybe he was. But anybody with eyes could have seen the devastated look on Sebastian's face as he took his final bow, and saw only one of his fathers in the audience. It broke Loki's heart. For once, he was grateful for Anastasia's lifelong crush on Sebastian; she meekly asked if the three Stark children could come over to the Barton house for a group sleepover. Natasha must have sensed both Loki and Sebastian's upset, for she didn't argue, she didn’t complain. And, surprisingly, she didn't ask questions.

Loki had held off the tears, returning to their home determined to pack a bag for him and the children and leave — just as he had warned Tony he would do if things did not change. The kids had no idea what he had planned, and he was sure he would be able to weave a story they would believe. Keeping up the lie would be a challenge. And keeping them from Tony. He already knew little Audrey would put up the biggest fight; she was so attached to her father. He only hoped he could help them understand why he was doing this. Eventually. One day.

He nearly caved in and abandoned the idea when he walked out from the closet and saw the horrified look on Tony's face. Gathering his resolve, Loki continued to pack, but it didn't take long until he lost his cool and he was shouting. He would scold himself later for that remark about Sebastian. It was cruel, and Tony was right; Sebastian was every bit his son as he was Loki's. But his anger, for his son and for himself, was there, simmering at the surface, ready to boil over.

Loki could practically feel his heart breaking when Tony nearly collapsed to the bed. He wanted to scoop him up, to apologize. But things had deteriorated so much between them. And, Loki told himself, he had to stand his ground. Then there was Tony, begging for an hour, begging for Loki to listen.

"One hour," he stated before leaving the bedroom and heading downstairs. He put the kettle on and busied himself grabbing a tea bag and a mug while Tony shuffled in, sniffling, and sat at the dining table. It tore at Loki. "Do you want something?" he asked softly, but tartly.

"No," Tony murmured back.

Loki crossed his arms and faced Tony. It made him ache to see him so beaten down, but he honestly felt that Tony had no one to blame but himself, and therefore, he couldn't feel too sorry for him. At least, not very much. "Well?"

Tony lifted red-rimmed, bloodshot eyes to Loki, and launched into his explanation.

It was déjà vu. Loki felt like that college kid again, sitting on his boyfriend's couch in his dorm room, listening to him spin a tale about a hooker and his father and their still-new relationship. Twenty-one years had passed, and though the story had changed, the players were, mostly, still the same. Numbly, Loki dropped onto the chair adjacent from Tony, his tea set aside for now. It went deathly quiet between them as Loki processed all of this new information. He stared blankly at the table until Tony broke through his deep reverie.

"Loki…say something."

Loki’s eyes flicked up, steadily held Tony's gaze until he began to squirm in his seat. "Let me see if I understand this," he started, laying his hands, palms down, on the table.

Tony muttered a mild oath under his breath.

"You may or may not have slept with a woman you met at one of your galas; and for the past seven and a half months, this woman has been trying to blackmail you to keep it from me and the tabloid-loving world, threatened our children, and paid a man — an incredibly dangerous man — to break into our home and steal the only remaining sources of life you have; and upon meeting said woman, thusly skipping your son's theatrical debut, she turns out to be the prostitute my father hired twenty years ago to sabotage our relationship. And to add insult to injury, she was working not only with your rival, Justin Hammer, but also with Tha..." Loki breathed out slowly through his nose, his throat closing on the name. "The man whose name shall not be uttered in this house. Have I understood all of that correctly?"

Tony nodded, then let out a quiet, mirthless chuckle. "When you put it into words like that it sounds really bad."

"It sounds like a Shakespearean tragedy."

Tony hunched into himself a little. "Well..."

Loki struggled to keep his temper in check, remaining tight-lipped, and fought the urge to jump up and punch his fist through a wall. He couldn’t decide who to be angrier at: his dead father for bringing that wretched woman into his life in the first place, or his husband for…so much.

"You hate me?" Tony asked quietly. Loki lifted his gaze to him and sighed, his brows drawn up and together. On the table, his hands balled into fists.

"No. I am  _ furious _ with you. But I do not hate you.” He scoffed sharply, thinking of Natasha’s words from their heavy discussion just before his birthday. “I will never understand why you automatically assume I should hate you when you’ve upset me."

"It's what I'm used to, Loki," he countered flatly, looking away from Loki's sad eyes. "That's how everyone usually responds."

_ "I am not everyone!" _ Loki roared the words, swiping a fist across the table, knocking his abandoned mug of tea off. The crash of the ceramic to the floor had Tony jerking up, eyes wide and lips parted in shock. "I am your husband and I wish you would have a little more faith in me."

"Babe, I do; I do have faith —"

"Don't you dare!" Loki’s fists slammed to the table with each word. His eyes, as dark and frightening as Tony had ever seen them, locked onto his. "Do not sit there, look me in the eye, and tell me that, when you've spent the last seven months lying to me and keeping all of  _ this _ from me.  _ None _ of this would have been an issue had you told me from the beginning what was going on."

Guiltily, Tony lowered his head, nodding solemnly. "You're right," he croaked out.

Forcing himself to calm down, Loki pressed his fingers to his forehead, trying to think through his haze of anger. "Who else knows of all this?"

"Coulson and Fury," Tony mumbled, lips trembling as he fought tears. Loki had to tear his eyes away, his rage soaring at the sight. He covered his face, rubbing at his tired eyes, and wished he could figure out a way to erase this entire situation.

"What are your plans from here?" Loki questioned, holding his head in his hands, elbows resting on the table. He could hear Tony take an unsteady breath.

"I'll just go pack a bag." Loki's head shot up, cheeks damp from the angry tears he’d failed at stopping. "I'll stay at a hotel or something tonight. There's no reason for you to leave. I'll be back in the morning so we can tell the kids."

Loki stared at Tony, his anger slowly dissipating to shock and regret, waiting for Tony to look at him. When he finally did, Loki's eyes began to fill. "I m...meant about Amy — Moira — whatever she's calling herself these days."

"Oh." Tony cleared his throat and the pressure in Loki's chest eased slightly at the way Tony's cheeks colored a light shade of pink. "Um. I'm gonna pay her, obviously. I can't risk that technology getting into the wrong hands. If the Japanese ever got their hands on it, Asia would be taking over in one giant empire in the span of a couple of years. If that. And they wouldn't even have to do it forcefully 'cause they —"

"Anthony."

"Would have the — oh. Right. Rambling. Sorry. But, yeah. Pay her off."

Loki's mind worked, his fingers tapping in a quick tempo against his forehead. "And how do you plan to get the money to her?"

Tony shrugged. "Probably through S.H.I.E.L.D. She'll want another one-on-one, but..."

Loki nodded once. "Get the money together and set up a meeting directly with her."

When Tony simply stared at him, Loki cocked a brow. "...Why? I don't wanna see her again."

"You're not going to.  _ I _ am going to meet with her." Loki pushed his chair back and rose, moving to the pantry to pull out a broom and dustpan.

"What? Are you seri — Loki!" Tony jumped up and followed, sputtering a little as he went. "What do you mean you're —"

"I mean exactly what I said, Anthony," Loki answered calmly as he began to sweep up the mess of his broken mug. "I will be meeting with her."

"Why?"

Loki turned, brows furrowed, head tilted in question. "Why? Because our family is falling apart."

"We're not falling apart."

"Aren't we?" He threw out the hand holding the broom in an exasperated gesture. "Audrey won't stop taking out her aggression on the poor unsuspecting boys at school. Jameson refuses to speak up in class because his classmates will not stop picking on him for always giving the correct response. Sebastian likely hates you right now, and me for not doing a better job at keeping you around." He paused, the words he was about to say making his insides tremble. "I was on the verge of leaving you tonight, Anthony."

The silence that followed that statement was almost deafening.

"And we're trying to bring another child into this mess?" Loki set aside the broom and dustpan and dropped his head into his hand, exhausted from it all, doing his best to stave off that old familiar feeling of everything crashing down on him. "I will not give this woman the satisfaction of separating us. And, I am tired of sitting here like the good little husband waiting for you to fix everything. Clearly, it is time I stepped up."

Tony's brows rose at the same time his mouth fell open. "What are you gonna do?"

Loki lifted his eyes to Tony's. "I am going to beat her at her own game."

The worried expression on Tony's face did not dissipate. "What do you mean? What game?"

"Blackmail."

"Loki...we don't have anything on her."

"No, not yet. But we will." He straightened, pushed back a stray strand of black hair, and carried the dustpan to the trash to empty it.

"How?"

"I'll let you know," was Loki's only explanation, replacing the broom and dustpan to their spot. Tony just shook his head.

"We don't have anything on her, Loki,” he repeated more firmly. “We don't have an  _ inkling _ of anything. I mean, even S.H.I.E.L.D. can’t get anything on her. How are we supposed to?"

Loki crossed his arms, fixing Tony with a hard look. "Anthony, do you trust me?"

Tony blinked. Then made a frustrated noise in his throat. "What does that have to do with anything?" Loki lowered his chin; his expression read  _ Answer the question _ . It gave Tony the chills. "With my life, okay?"

"Good." The harsh look gone, Loki moved around Tony and started out of the kitchen.

"Wait — what are you gonna do? Loki." Tony followed, stopping short when Loki turned to face him.

"Let me worry about it. Though, I do need you to do something for me."

"What?"

"Have Jarvis hack into the security system of the hotel where the gala was held. Make sure he checks the elevators, the hallways, and the lobby. And if it's available, any outside security systems that have a view of the hotel, specifically the room you were in." Tony stared at him, wide-eyed and slack-jawed. Loki rolled his eyes and reached out to tap the earpiece Tony wore in his ear every day to communicate with Jarvis when he was away from his lab. "Jarvis? Did you get all that?"

_ "Yes, sir. I have already started." _

"Good." He looked at Tony and nodded, starting out again.

"What made you think of that?"

Loki chuckled and slowly faced him. "You know, Anthony, there was a time before I was a househusband and father of three. I caused a lot of trouble at the orphanage and at home. And in school I was known as quite the trickster. Plus, I watch a lot of  _ Law & Order _ .” He grinned, weakly, before sobering again. “Sometimes, in order to catch a criminal, you have to think like one."

"You're not a criminal."

"Not in this life."

Tony smiled wistfully, knowing very well he should be down on his knees thanking whoever it was that decided to put this man in his life when they did. "I wish I had known you then. When you were in school."

"I don't know that I would have let you." A small part of Loki wanted to enjoy the way Tony's face fell. But he couldn't take any pleasure in his pain, no matter how angry he was with him. Remembering his more braggart and overconfident ways, he sighed, shrugged. "I was a different person then.” Stronger. Braver.  _ Better _ . “You should probably let Coulson know of our plans."

Tony nodded as Loki turned away again. "I'll give him a call. Loki." He stopped and turned again. For a moment Tony forgot how to speak. His face felt hot as those eyes, eyes he knew so well, eyes he’d always seen the best of himself in, bore into him. "I  _ am  _ sorry...for all of this. I thought — I thought I could take care of it." His eyes lowered gradually as, once more, Loki gravitated back toward him. "And the longer I waited, the harder it got to tell you." Tony's voice shook as he spoke, and tapered off until he was near whispering.

"I know how strong you are, Anthony," Loki began, fingers twitching, aching to slide through that dark hair, to comfort and soothe. "There are lot of things you do, daily, that do not require my help." Because he couldn't get his mouth to work, Tony could only shake his head. He eyes threatened to spill over as he lifted them to meet Loki's gaze. "You know it's true. The issue I have here is…how am I supposed to teach our children that they can trust me and come to me with their problems when I cannot convince my own husband of the same?"

Tony heaved a sigh, swiped quickly at his face. "Loki, it has nothing to do with you. It's  _ me _ ."

" _ No. _ " Loki inhaled sharply, not wanting to lose his temper, not after holding onto it, for the most part, up to this point, and ignored the way Tony jumped. "When are you going to understand that everything,  _ everything  _ that affects you affects me. Affects  _ us _ ! How many times must I repeat it?"

Tony hung his head, still fighting back tears. "Okay." He hated how weak and defeated his voice sounded. But he knew Loki was right and that he deserved so much worse than what Loki was giving him. "I'll call Coulson...then I'll go up and pack a bag and go."

"You're not going anywhere." Tony remained still for a moment, sure he had misheard. Sheepishly, keeping his head down, he peeked up at Loki, unable to recall seeing such a determined look on his face. "I will not let that woman split us up now. Not over a damned  _ possibility _ of infidelity. You will stay. We will work this out. You need to be here to speak Sebastian tomorrow.  _ If _ he will allow you to, that is."

With that, Loki pivoted on his heel and headed toward the stairs, leaving Tony in the kitchen.

"And no more sleeping in the lab," he shouted over his shoulder. "You have a perfectly comfortable bed upstairs. Use it."

* * *

Tony stayed frozen to his spot for several long minutes. It'd been a long time since Loki had taken that tone with him. So authoritative. Domineering, even. He found it oddly comforting. He called up Coulson, explained briefly his meeting with Moira, Loki's reaction, and set up a time for the agent to meet with Loki and discuss Loki's plans. Whatever they were. Once he had finally hung up the phone, Tony was exhausted, through and through. He wanted a drink. No, not just a drink; he wanted to get drunk. Blackout drunk. Into a stupor drunk. But he was literally too tired to search for his nearest bottle of Jack. And now, climbing the steps up to his own bedroom, Tony felt like he was climbing the steps into Mordor.

_ Fucking Jazz _ , he thought with a half-hearted snort. Having sped through the books, Jazz was lately obsessed with  _ The Lord of the Rings _ films and had been watching them on repeat. And when Tony was home, the kid talked his ear off about them to the point he was dreaming about pretty elves that looked more like Loki than Orlando Bloom and cursed gold rings.

Stomach in knots, Tony stepped into the bedroom and went still.  _ That was fast _ , he thought. The bed had been cleared and turned down but Loki was nowhere in sight. The switching on of the faucet had Tony turning his head toward their bathroom where Loki was going through his nightly ritual. Unwilling to go near the bed just yet — it felt so foreign after all this time — Tony made himself busy changing into pajama pants and an old black tank. Loki stepped out just as he'd pulled the tank over his head. Loki briefly met his gaze, then moved to his side of the bed as Tony ducked into the bathroom. It was an awkward dance.

In the bathroom, Tony did his best to stave off the emotional breakdown he'd been avoiding since spilling everything to Loki. The pitiful sobs he had held back burned in his chest and unshed tears prickled at his eyes. No matter how many times he splashed water on his face, it still felt heated with the embarrassment, panic and fear he had been pushing deep, deep down for months.

The bedroom was shrouded mostly in darkness when he exited the bathroom, but for the lamp on his side of the bed left burning, and the dimmed glow of the arc reactor under his tank. Halfway to the bed, Tony realized he had been tiptoeing on carpet. Feeling like an even bigger fool, he switched off the light and carefully slid between the sheets, careful not to jostle the bed, and covered the light of the reactor with his hand.

Finding relief in stretching out on a soft mattress, instead of sleeping slumped in a chair, or half bent over one of his worktables, and comforted by the simple knowledge that he was lying beside his husband — even with the space between them and their backs to each other — Tony curled into himself. But now that he was so relaxed, he was unable to fight back his overwhelming emotions much longer, and finally, he let the hot tears fall. He fought to keep his breathing even, or at the very least quiet, not wanting Loki to hear him. He knew he had failed at that too when he heard a soft sigh and the bed dipped and shifted with Loki's movements.

But he hadn't expected the arm to slide over his waist. And hold on tight.

"Stop blubbering, you fool," Loki murmured into his hair. The sentiment only served to make Tony laugh briefly through his tears before he continued to cry.

"I'm so sorry, Loki. I'm...such an...idiot," he managed through his sobs and gasping breaths.

Loki hummed against him, gently pressed his hand over Tony's heaving chest, just beneath the arc reactor, and rubbed back and forth. "Yes. But you're  _ my _ idiot."

Tony sniffled, noisily, and clutched at Loki's arm, still firmly around him. "I...m...s-sor-ry." Loki pulled him tighter to his chest, brushing the hair sticking to Tony's damp forehead back, before he nuzzled softly into him.

"I know, you silly man. Now, stop your tears."

"Will you...h-hold me...'t-til I f-f-fall aslee-eep?"

"Yes, Anthony. But you need to calm yourself. You're going to hyperventilate."

"But I —"

"Shh..." Loki began to rock with him, cooing softly. Like he did with the kids when they had nightmares. "I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere."

Tony’s tears, making him all the more exhausted, eventually stopped and he finally began to simmer down to soft mewls. Loki knew Tony had finally given himself up to sleep when the grip on his arm started to ease. Comfortably wrapped around his Tony, quieting his worries of what lay ahead of them, for now, Loki slipped into a peaceful sleep himself.

* * *

Despite sleeping the night, and a good portion of the morning, in his husband's arms, Tony was still hesitant to believe that Loki had completely forgiven him. He had woken up before Loki, slid from his arms and crept downstairs quietly, snatching up his keys and sneaking out to his car. He couldn't cook like Loki, so instead he stopped off at a local diner and picked up a pancake breakfast for him, a steak and eggs breakfast for himself.

Loki was appreciative, but things were still slightly strained.

And it didn't get any better when they reunited with the kids. As always, Audi was happy to see Tony, and even Jazz's face lit up when he spotted Tony behind the wheel as they pulled up to the Barton house to pick them up. But Bash said nothing as he climbed into the car; he wouldn't even meet Tony's gaze, and with his headphones on, he easily ignored both his and Loki’s greetings.

When they returned home, Bash, still sulking to himself, marched straight up to his bedroom and stayed there for the rest of the night. Loki even fixed a plate for him at dinner and allowed Bash to eat his dinner in his bedroom. Tony knew better than to argue.

After a few days of the silent treatment, and Bash's blatant avoidance to be anywhere near him, Tony had had enough. Loki's unwillingness to intercede didn't help the situation. Bash would come around in his own time, Loki had said. Bullshit, Tony had countered. If Bash was anything like Loki, and he  _ was _ , he would hold that grudge against him until Tony was on his deathbed.

Finally, Tony caught a break when Jazz ran low on supplies for his final history project, and Tony was able to convince Loki to take him to the craft store for more paper, and to drag little Audi along for the ride. Bash must have heard the commotion of the three of them leaving. Tony hadn't been alone but a few minutes when he heard the descending footsteps — and felt his stomach drop.

Tony was about to go to the kitchen to find some cookies or something to spoil their dinner with, and tried to make himself look busy. As opposed to looking like he was waiting anxiously for Bash to come into the room. He stood at the kitchen counter facing the steps, and pulled a handful of Oreos from a glass jar, watching the head of dark hair poke into the living room and move in further. Tony’s heart sank a little when those eyes spotted Tony and his face darkened.

“Hey, kiddo," he greeted with an enthusiasm he wished he actually felt.

Taking a page from his father’s book, Bash barely moved, and looked eerily calm. “Where’d Pop go?”

“To the store. Jazz needed some stuff for his project. And Audi went, too.” Awkwardly, Tony held out a cookie. “Want one?” Bash’s eyes rolled as he shook his head and started to turn away, pausing, but not turning around, when Tony hurriedly called his name. “You have to let me apologize eventually, kiddo.” He could practically see the muscles of Bash’s slim back bunch and tense.

“No, I don’t. You don’t have to anyway.”

Sighing wearily, Tony came around from behind the counter, and threw up his hands helplessly. “I  _ want _ to. Okay? I want to explain why —”

“Don’t bother.” Bash turned now, his shoulders jerking in a feeble imitation of a shrug. “You don’t have to. I get it.”

His mouth hanging open in mid-sentence, Tony’s lips slowly came back together, his face slowly creased into a frown. “What...what do you mean? You get what?”

“I shouldn’t have expected you to be there.”

_ Ouch _ . Tony scrubbed a hand over his face. “Bash…”

“I mean, you weren’t even there for Jazz. And he’s your  _ real _ son.”

“Bash.” Tony spoke his name in a sharper tone, but Bash continued to speak.

“Why should you give a crap about the one that’s not really yours?”

“Sebastian, that’s enough.” Tony’s voice, firm and short, echoed in the silence that followed, in the spacious room the two of them stood in. He sighed, swiped a hand over his mouth. “You're allowed to say one shitty thing like that to me, maybe once a year.” He set his eyes on Bash. “You just used every one up until you're thirty.”

Bash lowered his eyes to his feet, still pouting, but Tony caught the slight bob of his burgeoning Adam’s apple as he swallowed.

“Sit down,” he said, flicking his fingers toward the dining table. Bash made no move, except to peek up at him. “I said, sit down.” Sebastian moved now, grumbling softly, to pull out one of the chairs and sat, slouching and crossing his arms. The pout remained firmly in place. Tony blew out a breath as he leaned against the counter, facing Bash. It was a scene much like the one a few nights ago between he and Loki. “Look, I know you're pissed at me, kiddo. You probably even hate me a little. And you have every right to be. Not being there for your opening night was…well, it sucked. And it — it's on me.”

His eyes briefly lifted to peek at him, but otherwise, Bash had no response.

“I won't make any excuses, okay? Because there are none. But you have to know I wanted to be there. And it killed me that I wasn't.” Bash’s lips moved and Tony thought he may have said something but he couldn’t hear it. “What?”

“Why weren't you there?”

“Well, I…hm…” Tony hummed softly as he sat in the chair at the head of the table, adjacent to Bash’s chair. “It's kind of complicated,  _ but _ …” he emphasized the word when Bash scoffed, likely expecting Tony to brush him off. “I will explain as much as I possibly can to you.”

Appearing to accept that, Bash sat up a little straighter, and looked at Tony for longer than a few seconds. Tony attempted a small grin, not sure how he would explain the situation to a twelve year old boy, with the intelligence of a young adult, at times. Bash frowned, but nodded.

“You know your grandfather, your father's father, um, Odin…he wasn't happy about your father and I being together.”

“Why not?” Bash’s voice was barely above a whisper.

Tony shrugged, a noise somewhere between a scoff and a chuckle sounding in his throat. Folding his hands together on the table, he answered, “Honestly, a lot of reasons, kiddo. Number one likely being, he was a senator; he had a certain image to project to the public. I didn't fit into that perfect picture.”

“How come?”

Tony struggled to find the right words. “Again, it was a lot of things. Even your Uncle Thor had his concerns, too, because he knew me more than anyone, at the time. Bring my roommate and all. Most of our friends thought I was…experimenting at your father's expense. I had a moment myself when I  worried I was doing that too.”

“Were you?” Bash lifted a brow when Tony looked at him, dipped his head to the side.

“In a manner of speaking? Probably. But, even if it did start out like that, Bash, things between your father and I changed real quick.”

“Gee, I wonder why,” he scoffed. “Let me guess, you had sex?”

“You know, your casual way of saying that really freaks me out. So…stop it.” Tony thought he saw the flash of a smile, but didn’t want to spoil the moment by pointing it out. “It wasn't just sex, Bash,” he added quietly. “Your father made me wait a long time, believe it or not.”

“Yeah, right.”

“Bash.” Bash relented with a shrug. “Look, I've told you all of this before: your father was the first person I ever loved. The first and only person I ever  _ fell _ in love with. And that…that pissed some people off. And scared others. And even threatened some.”

“What are you talking about? Isn't people being in love supposed to be a good thing? And what does any of this have to do with you missing my opening night?”

“Okay, okay,” Tony rushed to quiet him before he stormed off. “Yeah, yes, it's — falling in love is life changing, Bash. But…it’s difficult to explain why people would have an issue with it. Um…my dad…didn't support our relationship either.” Remembering the words Howard had used had Tony’s eyes watering. “And your other grandfather Odin…” He blew out another slow breath. How the hell was he supposed to explain this one? “Well, he tried to break us up.”

Bash blinked, and his brows rose and came together. “Why?”

“It' s—” Tony shook his head, avoiding Bash’s eyes. “That's not important anymore, kiddo. In the end, your grandfather got to know me and he actually came to like me. But, you know, who wouldn't?” He chuckled, but it quickly died off, as Bash didn't even crack a smile. “Look, all the stuff that happened when we were in college is water under the bridge now. Except that…the woman your grandfather hired to break us up all those years ago…”

Bash’s jaw dropped. “W…woman? He hired a woman to…?  _ What? _ ”

Tony sighed, rubbed at his face, resting his elbows on the table. “You don't need to know the details, okay? It's way too convoluted to explain anyway.”

“What does that even mean?”

“It means…you're not old enough to understand. I know —” Tony was cut off by Bash’s sharp sigh, and he frowned as Bash dropped his fists to the table with a thump. 

“Dad, you said you were going to explain.”

“And I'm trying! But, Bash, there are some things that need to be kept between your father and I. And some things you can't understand because you're too young. If it was confusing for me at twenty-two, it sure as hell is going to be hard for you to understand at twelve.”

He saw the boy’s shoulders straighten, set. Tense. “Does Pop know at least?”

“Of course he does. Now,” he muttered, looking away momentarily. Tony heard another huff, and when he glanced up, Bash had stubbornly crossed his arms. “Kiddo.” He reached out, laying a hand on Bash's arm to draw his attention. “The point is that I don't want you to ever doubt that you are as much my son as Jazz is. You're pissed off at me and that's fine. You're allowed to be under the circumstances.”

Bash’s eyes went wide briefly, and Tony could feel him relax slightly under his hand.

“You'll get over it, because I know that deep down you  _ know _ I love you.” Tony forced himself to keep his eyes on Bash’s even as his voice broke. But then Bash looked away, his lip trembling. Tony pulled his hand back and when he spoke again, his voice was low and thick with emotion. “I know what it's like to have a father that hates you, Sebastian. The last thing I want is for you to feel anything remotely close to that for a second. A millisecond. A  _ nano _ second.”

“You…you never said your dad hated you.”

Tony nodded, fighting tears. “He wasn’t a very warm man. And he never really took the time to…get to know who I was.” Voice cracking again, Tony brought his hand up to press his finger and thumb to each corner of his eyes, trying to hold back the tears stinging them. A few moments had passed when suddenly two skinny arms wrapped around Tony’s shoulders. He opened his eyes, lips curving, and heart swelling, at Bash’s uncharacteristic display of affection. Tony gave Bash’s arm a small squeeze before pushing to his feet and pulling the teen into a hug, holding him tightly. “C'mere, kiddo.”

Bash went willingly, to Tony’s happy surprise, resting his head against Tony’s shoulder, sniffling softly. “I'm sorry, Dad.”

“No.” He pushed at Bash’s hair, sticking up and tickling his chin, before pressing a kiss to the top of his head. “You have nothing to be sorry for, hon.” Bash responded with more sniffling. “Hey.” Tony took him by the face, pulling him back to wipe at his tears. “You were really good, you know? In that play.”

“I was okay,” Bash said with a shrug.

Tony dropped his hands, grinning teasingly. “You get any phone numbers from this?”

Bash ducked his head, blushing lightly. “I might've…,” he answered shyly.

“That's my boy,” Tony beamed, chucking Bash under the chin.

“Don’t tell Ana,” Bash said, wiping at his nose with his sleeve. Tony mimed zipping his lips. “I really am sorry, Dad. About...your dad.”

Tony shook his head. “It was a long time ago, Bash. Maybe now you understand why your father and I have worked really hard to be good to you guys. Because neither of us had it good with our dads.”

Bash nodded, slipping his hands into his back pockets. “I guess I am pretty lucky then. Since I've got two of you.”

Tony grinned. “And a really awesome mom.”

“And an awesome mom,” he agreed, chuckling. It lasted for a few golden seconds before Bash sobered. “Is everything okay with you and Pop?  _ Really _ okay?”

Tony inhaled deeply, his breath hitching from the earlier emotion, and because he felt like it, pushed at Bash’s hair so he could see his face fully. “We're getting there, kiddo. I think we'll be all right. You know you should really stop worrying so much about your parents and their relationship.”

Bash scoffed, almost offended. “I’m not worried. I’m just curious…”

“I know you are. You ask a lot of questions. You ask your Pop the same stuff you ask me?”

“Well…” Bash looked away, biting his lip.

“Bash…” Tony drew out his name. “What are you keeping from me?”

“Nothing. I just…” His darted to something behind Tony. With a short sigh, he walked around Tony to grab the clear cookie jar still sitting on the counter, and carried it to the table, setting it down before Tony’s vacated chair and taking his own.

Tony moved toward his chair, but didn’t yet sit. “What are you doing?”

“You're probably gonna wanna munch on those. I've got some questions.”

* * *

“Are you out of your fucking mind?”

“Possibly,” Loki answered Natasha promptly. He looked toward the playpen in the corner of the living room, in the midst of being packed up, when Xander babbled incoherently, and smiled at the one year old boy. Sitting in the center of the pen, Xander grabbed a stuffed bear and tossed it over the edge.

“You can't do this, Loki.” Natasha crossed her arms angrily, but the action lost some of its heat as her arms settled on top of the roundness of her pregnant belly.

Loki returned his attention to her, lost the smile, and shrugged. “Why not?”

“Because you're not a goddamn action hero in a comic book movie!” She yelled the statement at him and looked at the playpen at the movement. “Stop it, Xander,” she scolded when he tossed another stuffed animal out.

“Darling, I'd hardly be the hero,” he said through a smirk.

“Whatever. You're not a villain either,” she returned vehemently.

“That's debatable,” he muttered.

“Stop it.” Natasha had reached for a stack of newspapers and slammed them down on top of the sofa in frustration. She had been doing what she could to pack up her living room when Loki decided to come over, seeking her support on his plan to deal with Amy/Moira. How that stupid bitch weaseled her way back into their lives, she’ll never know. But from what Loki had said, she had had her eyes on them for quite some time. And now he had this ridiculous idea to confront the psycho. 

And she had to be a thousand months pregnant, unable to kick Amy’s hooking ass like she had the last time.

At her outburst, Loki seemed to relent, soften even, and stood from his chair in the corner, crossing the room to pick up Xander. “I'm not sure I know what you are getting so upset about, Natasha,” he said, resting Xander on his hip, but looking only at him.

To keep from throwing the damn thing at Loki’s head, Natasha wrapped a clay something or other with Rowan's tiny handprint impressed upon it in newspaper and set it in a box with other wrapped knickknacks. “You're being stupid.” She looked up in time to see the hurt expression on Loki’s face, even as he dodged Xander’s tiny little fists. “Don't give me that look. That bitch tried to ruin your life twenty years ago. She's back, still trying and you, like a fucking idiot, want to confront her?”

“I can handle her, Natasha.”

“Really? 'Cause you couldn't twenty years ago.”

Loki frowned, huffing with it, and moved to put Xander back down. Why did everyone feel the need to point that out to him? “There's no need to insult.”

“That was hardly an insult and you know it.” Busying herself wrapping more items, Natasha set them in a box. When she started to try to lift it, Loki was there, doing it for her. She watched him move it to the floor, tape it closed. She waited for him to finish, looking up at him, her mouth set in a tight line. “From what you've told me, she sounds more dangerous than she already was. Don't go through with this, Loki.”

Sighing softly, Loki moved to close the short distance between them to take her by the arms. “You're worrying too much, Natasha; which is not good for the baby.” He rested a cool palm on her belly. “And you forget who you're talking to.” He took her hands in his, linking their fingers. “She may be a different person now, but so am I. And she's screwing with my family. I've had enough.”

Natasha lifted her eyes to his, searching them for any sign of hesitation or fear. But all she saw was determination, and that little hint of mischief that always had Loki’s eyes alight. She knew there was nothing she could do to stop him. “What are you gonna do?”

His lips twitched, and he gave her hand a squeeze. “I have a plan. But I need you to check some things for me. Legally.”

“Legally?” She made a face and took a step back, but left her hands in Loki’s. “She's gonna go into S.H.I.E.L.D. custody. Why go about legally? They don't care.”

He released her hands and shrugged. “Perhaps they don't; but I do. If I can incriminate her legally, I want to. In case S.H.I.E.L.D. decides to give her up. Her husband, from what the information Anthony has gathered so far suggests he was a dangerous and ruthless man, with his fingers in a lot of pockets. She aided in a lot of that once they married, in the short time before they decided to, as Anthony put it ‘go straight.’ If this is done right, Amora will be locked up for a long time.”

Natasha still wasn't convinced. “Aside from the legal stuff, will you let me help in some way?”

“Yes. Of course.” His eyes lowered to her belly. “ _ If _ you can.”

“You let me worry about that. When do you meet with Coulson?”

“In a few days.” Her lips parted. “No,” Loki cut her off firmly. “You are not coming with me.” Natasha’s lips snapped shut, and her face pinched into a dark frown. Loki grinned and took a step forward to kiss her cheek. “I have to go now. I am to meet Sif at the obstetrician's office.”

The glower remained on her face, softening only minutely when he moved to the playpen again and lifted Xander for a quick kiss. “You gonna find out the sex today?”

“Sif will, likely. Mmff.” Loki’s face scrunched as Xander's little hand landed palm-first to his face and grabbed hold of his nose. He carefully peeled it away and bounced him lightly in his arms. “You know Anthony and I don't like to know until the birth.”

“Weirdos,” Natasha mumbled, slowly walking around the sofa, as Loki just laughed and set Xander down. “How can you choose names if you don't know if it’s a boy or a girl? How can you design the nursery?”

Loki breathed a quiet sigh, smiling affectionately at his old friend. “We keep it neutral, you know that. We’re not always planners. We didn’t choose Jameson’s name until moments before he was born. Besides, just as we did with Audrey, we’ve looked at names for both sexes.”

Natasha nodded, rolling her eyes as Loki went on. “Yeah, yeah… How are the kids taking it?”

He made a noncommittal noise. “Sebastian acts as if he doesn't care, as he does with most things that don’t directly involve him, but when names are suggested, he's very vocal about what he likes. Jameson is the most excited,” he said with a small smile. “He phones Sif every day when he returns home from school to find out how she and the baby are doing. And Audrey is…still adjusting. She's not happy about not being the baby anymore.”

“We went through that with Rowan. I think if Xander had been a girl there would have been issues. You better pray for a boy.”

Loki chuckled as she followed him to the door. After opening it, he turned back and gave her cheek another kiss. “Speak to you soon, darling.”

Natasha latched onto Loki’s arm, giving the long limb a sharp tug that had him jerking back into the house after he had stepped out. “Loki.” He lifted a brow in question, his eyes startled wide. “Be careful. She’s still watching you.”

Loki relaxed, and turned to grasp her by the arms again, shaking his head. “S.H.I.E.L.D. and Anthony swept the house, the cars, his lab. They’re not sure how she has kept track of us, but we’re being careful. We…,” he let out a soft breath. “We’ve agents guarding us now. They keep their distance, but they keep watch when we leave the house. The agents following Anthony were able to catch one of her men, actually.”

Natasha’s fingers slowly went numb and released Loki’s arm, her jaw dropped. She blinked, and jabbed a fist into Loki’s shoulders, making him cry out. “Why didn’t you tell me any of this before, you stupid shit?”

“Ow! Natasha!”

“Tony may have kept  _ you  _ in the dark, Loki, but you kept  _ me _ in the dark, too!”

Rubbing at what was likely to be a bruise, Loki had to blink away the tears that had sprung up from the sharp pain of Natasha’s fist. “Darling,” he stressed through clenched teeth. “Don’t you understand: this is not your problem to solve. How many times must I rely on Anthony or you or Thor to fix everything?”

“I  _ can’t _ fix this,” she shouted in his face, her breath ragged from panting. And fighting emotions she didn’t want to have. “I know you’re going to do what you want to do, Loki. But you don’t need to do it alone. This has all been going on for months. You’ve been suffering for  _ months _ ! And you didn’t say a word!”

“You wouldn’t have believed me,” Loki countered, matching her level and tone. They both went quiet and looked toward the living room at Xander’s cry. Natasha shot him a look and started toward her baby, growling softly when Loki tugged on her arm to stop her. “You didn’t believe me in January.”

Her shoulders stiffened with guilt.

“I didn’t want to see that look in your eyes if I brought up the subject again. I…you’re my closest friend, Natasha. Even if I was wrong — which, technically, I was not. He was lying; just not about an affair. But even if I was wrong, I needed to keep you on my side.”

“I’m always on your side, you dumbass.” She shoved off his hand on her arm, only to wrap her arms around his torso. As best she could with the belly. Her lips pressed together, refraining from curving up in a smile, when Loki’s arms went around her. “Go on. Get out of here. I need to check on my kid.” She pulled back and shoved him away.

Loki laughed softly and reached for the doorknob, putting one foot out on the porch. “I love you, Natasha Romanov-Barton.”

“Yeah, well, who wouldn’t?” She indulged him, giving him a rare smirk, as he blew her a kiss and gave a wave before he closed the door behind him. She let out a long breath, rubbing at her neck, stretching her aching back, and groaned a little as Xander began to cry a little louder. “All right, all right. I’m coming, kid.”


	15. Revenge and Weapons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony helps Loki prepare for his meeting with Moira, but not without trying to talk him out of it, again, first.

Tony watched Loki as he moved about the room getting dressed for his meeting with Moira, his brow knitted with worry, but a small grin tugging at his lips. It was so utterly Loki that he would don his nicest suit to meet the woman that was trying to rip their family apart. “They're gonna pat you down,” he mumbled from his spot at the foot of the bed.

Loki finished buttoning up his shirt, and selected a thin black tie, wrapping it around his neck before he began to tuck the shirt into his black slacks. “Yes, likely,” he answered, his eyes moving from his own image to that of Tony’s in the mirror. The mood had been tense all morning in their bedroom. And Tony hadn’t left Loki alone for a second since he had declared his intention to meet Moira on his own. He was going so far as to find reasons to speak to him through the shower door while he bathed. “Do you not trust your own technology?”

Mentally, Tony ran over the schematics of the two-way earpiece he had built himself, currently in his hand as he turned it this way and that, waiting to fit it to Loki's ear when he was ready. It was the smallest piece of machinery he had ever made. “'Course I do,” he mumbled, not at all sounding like the confidant genius he usually was.

Zipping up his pants and smoothing a hand down his shirtfront, Loki moved to stand before Tony and reached out to caress his cheek, running his fingertips along his jaw to his chin, lifting his face. “What are you so concerned about?” His thumb rubbed lightly at Tony’s chin.

Tony jerked his face away from Loki's hand, glancing down to his hands, to the earpiece again. “What am I not concerned about might be the better question,” he answered, setting the earpiece aside on the bed covers.

Biting back a sigh, Loki lowered to the bed next to Tony, laid a hand over his wrist, and pulled at the rough hand until he could lace their fingers together, resting their joined hands between them. “Anthony, you need not worry about anything. I'll be fine.”

“How do you know?” he asked almost accusingly, looking up at Loki. As if remembering himself, that this was all his fault, he swallowed thickly, squeezed Loki’s hand. “Don't do this, Loki.” His voice had lowered considerably. “You don't know what she's capable of.”

“But I do.” Loki covered their linked hands with his other, gripped them firmly. “We’ve checked her out as thoroughly as possible. We have prepared. And I have to do this, Anthony.”

His mouth tightened briefly. “Why won't you let me come with you? We can do it together. I'd feel better — Loki —”

Loki shook his head adamantly, pulling his hand from Tony's tight grip to cup his cheek. “Anthony — Anthony, darling. Stop. Stop! Listen to me.” Tony went quiet, surprisingly quick, and Loki took a moment to compose himself before looking directly into Tony’s eyes. “I need to do this, Anthony. I have to do something more than just…sit by, twiddling my thumbs, waiting for you to fix everything for us. Besides…” He raised a hand to Tony's hair, brushing his fingers through the hair at the side of his head, at his temples, wondering if all this had it turning a little more gray than it was before. “I have handled her before. Remember?”

Tony had missed those affectionate little touches Loki was so free with, and now that he was slowly giving them away again, Tony wasn’t about to let his errant thoughts distract him from enjoying them. Too much. He leaned slightly into those long pale fingers, eyes drifting closed, and scoffed softly, a sly grin ghosting around his lips. “Could’ve sworn it was Natasha that handled her. Ow!” He jumped in his spot, swatting at Loki, when he twisted his ear and shoved at him before laughing softly. Their laughter slowly faded, and they both went quiet again. This time it was Tony who reached for Loki's hand.

“When this is all over, when we're back to our boring little lives —”

“S’not boring,” Tony said firmly, shaking his head, holding Loki's hand even tighter.

Loki smirked at Tony's profile. “You know what I mean. When it's done, we should start clearing out the office.” His lips curved softly when Tony lifted his head and frowned at him.

“ _ Your _ office?” Loki nodded. “Why?”

He cocked a brow, smiled fully now. “In case you forgot, we have a new baby on the way.”

Tony tilted his head more, eyes narrowing as he pondered. “And…you want to put it in your office?”

Loki laughed, nudging Tony with his shoulder. “No. I was thinking we should convert my office into a bedroom.” Tony frowned more and Loki made a little noise of exasperation. “For Sebastian. He'll be a teenager soon.” That line formed between his eyes, the thought, the words making his heart ache a little. “He should have his own bedroom.”

“Great idea,” Tony muttered with a roll of his eyes and half-scoff. Leaning forward, elbows on his knees, he dropped his chin onto his hands. “Put him in the one bedroom it would be easy for him to sneak Ana into. And we'll be upstairs, oblivious.”

Loki breathed another laugh, slipped an arm around Tony's middle, and gave him a gentle shake. “Do you not trust your son?”

“No,” he answered promptly, making Loki laugh again. Groaning softly, he pressed his fingers to his eyes. “I did once. When he was a sweet little boy. But it’s harder now that he’s got raging hormones and the curiosity of his father.” He chuckled at another nudge from Loki then sighed heavily, pushing a hand up through his hair, angling his head in Loki’s direction. “When the hell did we become the parents of a teenager?”

Loki settled his cheek on Tony's shoulder, his fingers idly rubbing at the skin on the side of Tony’s neck. “I told you once; it was the day he stopped calling me  _ Pappa _ and his voice started to change.” Tony made a small noise of agreement. “We can put the baby in one of the other rooms, with either Jameson or Audrey. Depending…”

“Mm.” Tony hummed in agreement and draped an arm over Loki’s legs, absently caressing his knee. They both looked toward their half-opened bedroom door when arguing was heard coming from the boys’ bedroom. “Ah, damn it…” Tony contemplated jumping up to close the door — did that make him a bad father? — but before he could finish the thought Sebastian and Jameson came bursting into the room, the smaller one tugging at the taller one’s shirt. Tony and Loki barely moved from their position, only moving in unison to sit up straight.

“I didn't do anything!” Jameson shouted in a tone that suggested he had been saying it repeatedly. Sebastian shook him off easily and stomped to his fathers.

“Liar! Dad, Pop, look!” He shoved a stereo with a cracked screen at them. “Spaz broke my iPod player!”

“I did not!” Jameson’s face went red with his denial and he shoved at Sebastian. “And don't call me that!” Sebastian simply pushed him back, making the smaller boy stumble back a few steps.

“Stop it,” Loki scolded both of them and reached for Jameson so he didn’t fall on his butt, and tugged him away from Sebastian. Jameson moved next to Loki, leaning on him, his little fingers finding their way into Loki's silky black hair.

“Knock it off,” Tony snapped, more irritated that the two of them had interrupted him and Loki in their quiet moment. He held out his hand for Sebastian's stereo and started to examine it. “Stop calling him that, Bash. I told you that shit isn’t cool.”

Loki elbowed Tony, who slid him a sly smirk before looking back at the stereo. Loki slipped an arm around Jameson, watching Tony twist and turn the stereo, inspecting it much like he had the earpiece. He grinned, biting his lip, seeing Tony’s “work face” emerge.

“I can fix this, no problem,” Tony finally declared after a few minutes. He looked up at Sebastian, who aimed a glare Jameson’s way. Tony followed his gaze. “Did you break this?” He gave the stereo a shake and something inside rattled around. Jameson’s eyes darted between Tony and Sebastian, and he held onto Loki a little tighter, pouting at them both.

“No.” He aimed a hard look right back at Sebastian. “If he asked me nicely, I coulda fixed it for him.”

Sebastian rolled his eyes, but Tony’s lips twitched. “Yeah?”

Jameson nodded and glanced down at Loki when he turned up his face to him and asked, “Could you?” Jameson blushed and hid his face in Loki's hair. Loki chuckled and turned to Tony, sharing a knowing look. At Tony’s subtle nod toward their bedroom door, Loki looked and sighed. “Audrey?”

A dark head of hair and half a face peeked out from behind the doorjamb in the doorway. “Huh?” Loki crooked a finger at her then patted Jameson on the leg. “Sebastian, I think you owe your brother an apology.”

Busy glaring at the doorway, Sebastian turned his scowl on Loki. “Fine, whatever. Sorry, Sp — Jazz.”

"Hey, genius.” Tony reached out to yank on Jameson’s shirt just as he started to step away from Loki, and plopped the stereo in his hands. “Get started on this for me, all right?”

“Dad!” Sebastian shouted in protest even as Jameson’s eyes went wide.

“Oh, don’t get your tighty whities in a bunch. I'll make sure it's fixed properly.”

Sebastian only groaned irritably and started out of the room. “Thanks a lot, brat,” he muttered to Audrey as he walked past her. Her lip wobbled.

“Sebastian.” He stopped and looked at Loki again, muttering an unapologetic sorry before leaving the room.

Jameson grinned at Tony. “Thanks, Dad.”

Tony tried to hide his proud grin as Jameson left, though he quickly switched on his Stern Dad Face as Audrey edged closer, a finger at her mouth. “C'mere.” She went straight to Tony, leaning into him immediately, as Jameson had with Loki. “No, no, no, no,” he chuckled, pulling her back and forcing her chin up even as she tried to keep it down. “Did you break Bash's stereo?”

Audrey lifted those big hazel eyes, looking to Loki first, then Tony, still chewing on her fingernail, and shook her head.

“Are you telling the truth?” Loki asked. Audrey went still a moment, staring at Loki, then shook her head again. Leaning over, Loki reached for her arm, taking her finger from her mouth. “What were you doing in the boys' room?”

“Nothing. I didn't mean to break it. Honest.”

“I'm sure you didn't mean to, darling, but that doesn't answer my question. Why were you in there?”

Audrey’s chin quivered. “I was just looking around. I couldn't find my baseball glove and Jazz said he was gonna take it back 'cause it was his first. And then I-I-I tripped on Bash’s shoe and fell into the desk and knocked it off and it broke on the floor.”

Tony frowned and touched the back of his fingers to Audrey’s cheek, drawing her attention. “You should have come and told us before, Audi. Jazz has a new mitt, you know that.”

“But Jazz said —”

“No buts,” Loki interrupted, giving Audrey a firm look when she looked at him with big watery eyes. “How would you like it if your brothers came into your room, poking around in your stuff?” He poked at her belly with a finger to show he wasn't very mad and she pouted more, curling into Tony.

“They wouldn't do that.”

“They wouldn't,” Loki agreed. “Because they respect your privacy.”

Audrey sniffled, wiped at her nose. “Am I in trouble?”

“Well…kinda, Monkey.” Tony drew her closer, slipping an arm around her. “You broke something that wasn't yours.”

“I didn't mean it.” She turned her face into Tony’s shoulder and started to cry. Unable to help himself, Tony chuckled and cupped Audrey’s tiny face in one hand, wiping at her tears with his thumb.

“Stop crying, Audi. Nobody's yelling at you, princess, but you did something bad.” Loki ran a hand down her black curls and Audrey sniffled and she turned her face to look at him.

“B-but Bash called me a brat,” she cried, breath hitching as she rubbed at her eyes.

“Hmm. I think somebody is due for a nap. Come here.” Loki tucked his hands under his little girl’s arms and lifted her into his as he rose. She immediately laid her head on his shoulder, little arms and legs wrapped around him.

“Apologize to Bash. And tell him he owes you another one, too,” Tony called out to her. Audrey nodded at him, tears still falling silently as Loki carried her out of the room.

Alone, Tony fell back onto the bed, listening to Audi's tearful apology and Bash starting to argue about apologizing back then doing it reluctantly. It made him laugh because he could picture both of their faces the whole time. Sighing, Tony threw an arm over his eyes, the worry about Loki going to meet Moira seeping back over him. He listened to the sounds of his family: Bash angrily throwing things around and slamming drawers shut; Jazz humming to himself as he undoubtedly started to take Bash's stereo apart; and Loki and Audi's muffled voices as they spoke quietly and, happily, her quiet giggle quickly following.

His fear for what the day would bring had him, for a moment, imagining the whole scene…without Loki. He didn’t have Loki’s patience with the kids all the time, especially Bash. He couldn’t always draw Jazz out of his shyness, like Loki could. And he always gave in too easily with Audi. The thought of Loki not being there… It frightened him to the point that he bolted up, his stomach dipping sharply, panting in panic just as Loki stepped back into the room.

“Gods forgive me, but I hope we have another boy. I don't think I could handle another girl,” he said with a sigh. “At least she’s getting better at learning how to tie a tie.” He chuckled and started to fix the crooked tie he had instructed her through. Belatedly, he noticed Tony's breathing and the look on his face and paused. “What? What's wrong?” Saying nothing, Tony stood and went straight into Loki’s arms. It didn’t make Loki relax at all. “Anthony, what? You're starting to frighten me.”

“Don't you leave me here alone.” His voice was rough, raw with unshed tears and suppressed emotions. “Don't you leave me with four kids to raise on my own.”

Slightly confused as to how in the short time he was gone Tony had gone from joking with Audrey to him not being there, Loki wrapped his arms around Tony, his fingers sliding up and curling into the short strands of his hair. “Oh, my darling…” Loki held him for a moment, pulling back only when Tony’s hold made it difficult to breathe, and only enough to cup his bearded face. “Look at me…”

Tony’s eyes were red and watery when he lifted them to look at Loki, and struggled to hold his gaze. “If you're gonna patronize me, don't.”

He smirked softly, rubbing his thumbs over the apples of Tony's cheeks. “I won't.”

Tony’s jaw tightened. “Loki…” He paused to sniffle. “You come back to me. You hear me? You. Come. Back. To. Me.”

“…Anthony…” Loki moved his hands down from Tony's cheeks over his neck, settling them on his shoulders, pressing his fingers into his shirt there. “Listen to me. Everything will be fine. I will go and speak to her, get her to admit to what she's been doing to us and be done with it. Then Amora Armstrong, or Moira Khan, whatever she calls herself, will be gone from our lives. She'll just be another one of the ghosts that we knew.”

Tony suppressed a sigh, pressed his lips together. “You talk like it's gonna be so easy. You don’t know that. You don’t what she has planned. And the fact that she doesn’t even know it’s you that’s coming and not me…? Loki —”

“Enough.” Loki gave Tony a rough shake, then catching himself, eased his grip on his shoulders. “It will be easy, love. She is just a bully. And bullies never win.”

“Sometimes they do.”

“Not this time,” Loki replied promptly and firmly. “Not against us. We've beaten bigger monsters than her.”

Tony breathed in deep, raising his hand to touch Loki’s face. “I love you.”

Softening immediately, Loki’s brows came together, hitched up. He didn’t, couldn’t, fight his eyes filling as he whispered, “I know.”

“I'm a shit husband sometimes.” Tony fought his own tears as he spoke, but he had to get the words out. Just in case. “I know it. I don’t deserve you, Loki. But nobody loves you like I do. And nobody ever will.”

“Anthony, don’t —” Loki didn’t get to finish his thought. The sharp tug on his tie had him stumbling into Tony and falling into a hard, deep kiss. He whimpered softly, allowing Tony to pour his emotions into the kiss, clutching at his shirt as he breathed Tony in, going dizzy with the scent. Eventually Loki broke the kiss, needing to breathe, but kept close to Tony, chuckling breathlessly as he leaned his forehead against Tony’s. “Don't get sentimental on me now, darling.”

Tony kept his hold on Loki tight, doing his best not to wrinkle his shirt. “What if I just bought you a bigger house?”

“…Because I called you sentimental?”

Tony’s laugh was loud but short, and he moved his head to press a kiss to Loki's neck. “No, you dope. To make room for the baby.” He leaned back to look at Loki, resting his hands at his hips, eyes roaming over his pale face. “This way you don't have to give up your office.”

Loki’s grin was slow, almost smug, as he leaned in to kiss Tony's cheek. “There's my genius. Using his brilliant mind for good.” Said genius rolled his eyes, laced their fingers of both hands between them. Over Tony’s shoulder, Loki caught the time and his smile faded. “I should get going.”

“Right.” That fear, the icy, sliver of panic, settled heavy in Tony’s belly again, his eyes following Loki as he moved to the closet to take his black suit jacket from its hanger. He picked up the earpiece from the bed, rolling it between his fingers.

“You will be all right?” Loki asked, sliding his arms into the jacket and fixing the collar, buttoning the one button at his waist.

Tony nodded. “Yeah. I’ll just go busy myself in the lab or something.”

Stepping forward, Loki cupped Tony's face in one hand, and kissed him again. Long and soft and slow. “I love you, Anthony Edward Stark.” Unable to form any words, Tony simply nodded, trying to smile. “I will see you later.” He said the words firmly, as if reassuring both Tony and himself.

Loki stepped back, starting around Tony for the door, but Tony kept a hold of one of his hands. “Be careful, baby,” he murmured slipping the earpiece into his palm.

Emotion swelled in Loki’s chest, forcing him to breathe out slowly, blink back more stinging tears. Tony hadn’t called him that in a manner that wasn’t pleading for something — patience, understanding, a sympathetic ear — in a long time. Suddenly another thought came to him and he faced Tony fully again. “Say it. It is our tradition after all.”

It took Tony a moment, but he quickly understood what Loki meant and he gave his hand a tight squeeze. Like the one currently around his heart. His voice was going to shake, he knew, but he said it anyway. “The sooner you go, the sooner you'll come back to me.”

Happy he caught on, Loki grinned even as his lips trembled. The way Tony’s voice cracked on the word me squeezed at his heart. “I will always come back to you.” Tony started forward, choking back a sob, but Loki stopped him with their joined hands on his chest. “Remember that.”

Tony nodded, understanding again, as Loki started out. He kept the grip on his husband’s hand, iron tight, until he couldn't anymore.

* * *

Following a brief discussion with Agent Coulson and Director Fury, Loki made his way to the meeting place designated by Moira. This time, she opted for a less conspicuous hotel — as in one not dead center in one of the busiest streets in Hollywood. Though it was the famed Beverly Hills Hotel, Loki was thankful he could waltz right in without much attention drawn to him. He carried with him a silver briefcase, the Stark Industries logo imprinted across it.

He knocked at the suite door on the first floor, and waited, barely batting an eye at the large guard who opened the door. In his most courteous manner, Loki asked the guard to let Ms. Khan know that Mr. Stark was there to see her. The guard allowed him into the room and escorted him into a living area. Loki sat in a stiff-padded chair, setting the briefcase at his feet, keeping his surprise at not being frisked to himself. Twenty minutes passed before Moira finally entered, smoking a cigarette from a long holder between her lips.

“Mr. Stark. It’s about time, you —”

Loki held back his grin when her steps stumbled, not hiding her shock well at seeing him instead of Tony. “Hello, Amora,” he greeted smoothly, rising from the chair, ever the gentleman. “My apologies. It’s  _ Moira _ now, yes? Or…have you undergone yet another name change in the last two weeks?”

She looked ready to burst. A thick vein began to pulse in the middle of her forehead. “Where the hell is Tony?” she demanded, through clenched teeth, fisting her free hand at her side before slapping it to her hip.

“Unavailable. We couldn't find a decent babysitter," he said with a sarcastic grin. "You will be dealing with me today.” Loki motioned to the identical chair directly across from his, a sleek, mahogany coffee table between them. His eyes on her, Loki lowered to his chair as she did.

“I guess I should have expected this,” she huffed quietly, settling in her chair, crossing one leg over the other. “I did sleep with your husband after all.” Her lashes lifted, bright green eyes glinting at Loki.

He knew she was trying to rile him up, get him to slip. Get the upper hand. But Loki simply rested his elbows on the arms of his chair, laced his fingers calmly. He could already see his cool demeanor was pissing off the woman. Because unbeknownst to Moira — so far — was that Jarvis' search revealed video of one of Moira’s bodyguards carrying Tony from the elevator into her room, the blonde herself following. Other, somewhat grainy footage from a hotel across the street showed that Moira Khan spent much of her night filing her nails and ordering room service.

“Was that not reward enough for you?” he asked with a raised brow. “After all, getting Anthony into bed has been a goal for you for some time, has it not? Your aim was to make him forget all about me. Yes?”

Moira sucked on her cigarette deeply, expelling the smoke on a sharp laugh. “That was only the beginning of what I have planned for the two of you, sweetheart.”

For a split second, Loki nearly lost the tight hold on his control. No one had called him ‘sweetheart’ since Thane. He and Tony had consciously removed it from their vocabulary, avoiding the word like the plague. The two syllables, even now, sent a chill up his spine that he had a hard time masking. But Moira said nothing, so he hoped he had hidden it well enough. “Tell me, Moira, was is it about my husband and myself that seems to obsess you so?”

“I am not obsessed!”

He cocked one slim black brow high over an amused eye. “Oh, my mistake. What word would you use then, hmm? Interested? Intrigued? Enamored, perhaps?” His face split darkly with a soft grin.

Moira reacted just as he expected; with a frustrated and annoyed sigh. “I am none of those things.” She plucked the cigarette from its holder and stabbed it into a glass ashtray on the coffee table. She finally looked at Loki as she sat back in her chair, settling once again with her legs crossed.

“Yet here we are, twenty years after our first meeting, and you are still intent on…what? Breaking up our family, our marriage? Tearing apart his company? Why do you want to ruin my husband’s life?”

“I can’t be the only person who’s ever wanted to ruin Tony Stark,” Moira scoffed, rolling her eyes away.

“No. You’re certainly not the first. But you are the most adamant.”

Like a pouting child, Moira crossed her arms and scowled across the room at Loki. Her brightly painted red lips pushed out. “Tony Stark has lived a privileged life. He’s had it easy every inch of the way, gotten everything he’s ever wanted handed to him on a silver fucking platter.” She lifted her eyes once more. “Including you,” she added in an accusatory tone.

Loki listened, having the distinct feeling he was listening to one of his children making excuses. Moira definitely had the mentality of a child. He couldn’t suppress the derisive snort that escaped at the silver platter remark. He angled his head at her last comment, brows lifting with an air of condescension. “Incredible how wrong one’s perception of another can be, isn’t it?”

Her eyes narrowed.

“For example, at first glance, you appear to be a woman of distinction and class. Your attire speaks of money and you carry yourself with pride.” A small smirk bloomed on his lips even as Moira puffed up. “But, really, it’s a veneer; a shiny gloss to cover up the simple truth that you’re nothing more than a common whore out to get whatever she can with the least amount of effort possible.”

The color drained from Moira’s face immediately. But before she could speak Loki continued.

“I’m aware it’s easy to dismiss Anthony as another philandering, partying rich boy whose grasp of reality runs as deep as a child's wading pool. Why, when I first met him, I thought he was an obnoxious spoiled brat. And he was. But there is so much more to him than you will ever know, Moira.” Loki set his gaze on hers; not hard, but focused. “And if you think Anthony Stark has ‘had it easy,’ your efforts of surveillance have been wasted.”

He saw her lips tighten, then the muscles in her jaw clenched.

"Did you think we were not aware?"

"No…I just didn't think Tony would tell you. He didn't tell you about our night. Who knows what else he hasn't told you?"

Loki chuckled, softly, covering his irritation that she would pick up on his first thought after Tony revealed everything. "You've been watching us, or more accurately Anthony for a while. Why?"

Moira coyly shrugged a shoulder. "Not that long. Actually, it was around the time you came back into the picture. But my dearly departed husband had had an interest in Stark Industries before I came along."

That was news to Loki. But Moira had at least given him an opening. "Oh? Tell me about your husband."

The face she made was similar to the face a child would make when told to eat their vegetables. "What do you wanna know?"

Loki shifted, settling back against the chair and lifting one long leg, to rest an ankle atop his knee. "What would you like to share? I am curious; did he know of your…past transgressions?"

Moira’s face turned to stone, but her eyes shot to the guard still standing at the door. She sighed, appearing to have made some decision, and looked at Loki. "No. I made sure he didn't. I gave him a false name, which ultimately became my new identity. He knew I was paid to keep powerful men company. He just didn't know how far that company went."

_ How stupid was he? _ was what Loki would have liked to have said. "You met him while working, then?" He cocked his head, smiling a little, when she narrowed her eyes again and her lips curled up.

"Yes. We met at a party."

"What was his interest in Stark Industries?"

Those lips curved now and it gave Loki a deep sense of foreboding. "He wanted to annihilate it."

Keep cool. "Why?"

Moira regarded him silently for a moment. Loki felt like she was trying to see through his cool, calm exterior. But what was she looking for? "You know who my husband was?"

"Not really," he answered slowly. "We looked him up, of course. He's a…colorful character."

She gave an unladylike snort. "He was a gangster, plain and simple. I didn't care, obviously; he was rich and he adored me. Going after Tony and his company wasn't just my idea, Loki. Tony Stark made a lot of enemies when he stopped making weapons. His were the best, after all."

A chill shivered through Loki. "You're confusing Anthony with his father, Howard," he said in a quiet voice. "He was the brain behind the weapons; not Anthony."

"But it was Tony who stopped production on them, therefore ending a generous supply of funds into my husband's bank account."

Loki let out a scoff before he could stop it. "Revenge and weapons. That's what this is all about? You're putting my children's lives at risk for  _ revenge _ and  _ weapons _ ?" His voice was rising but he couldn't seem to stop that either.

"And money," she said with a smile, completely disregarding Loki's point. "Speaking of which, where is my money?"

Seething, Loki forced himself to suppress the rage making his blood boil and spoke through clenched teeth. "Not yet. I want to know more."

"More of what? You know why we went after him now. It's not my fault you chose to marry the guy and build a frickin' family with him."

"Do you honestly think you will get away with this?" She smiled smugly at him. "You said it yourself, Moira. Tony Stark always gets his way. But now you've made the mistake of bringing my children into it. You will regret that. I will make sure of it."

She snickered. "And what's the stay-at-home, neglected wife gonna do? Don't you get it? You're just leverage, Loki. You're a casualty of war that your dear husband will sacrifice in order to please me. Your kids are worth even less than you. Once Tony's taken care of, they'll be easily ruined, too."

Loki smiled tightly, mostly to keep himself from spewing a lecture of just how amazing his children were. It would be a waste of breath and would only fall on deaf ears. He almost took pleasure in her assumptions of his weakness and unimportance. It would make defeating her that much more satisfying. "I suppose we shall see."

Moira rolled her eyes, muttered, "Whatever."

Loki lowered his eyes, dragged a finger over the polished wood of the arm of the chair, mind working, reevaluating. "Tell me, Moira, what did you do with yourself after you were released from prison?"

When he lifted his gaze, Moira was staring at him. "You mean the shithole  _ your father _ put me in?"

He inadvertently laughed. "You put yourself there, Moira. How long had you been out before you met your husband?"

Looking away, she jerked her shoulders. "Few years. We got married six months later. Spent a good two months in the Caribbean, doing some business and honeymooning. Then we —"

Loki cocked his head as Moira suddenly cut herself off. A sense of apprehension made his belly quiver when she shot a look of exasperation at him. Hoping to appease her, he lifted the corners of his mouth in a weak smile. “Then…?”

Her eyes shot to something above his head. “Did you check him?”

Loki assumed she was speaking to the guard behind him, because she was certainly not speaking to him, and his answer must not have satisfied her. Suddenly, Moira shot to her feet, gave a snap of her fingers, and in the next moment, Loki was being hauled to his feet and manhandled roughly.

“You idiot. Why didn’t you check him for a wire?” Moira spat, pacing angrily in the small space of the sitting area, while hands poked and prodded in places on Loki that even Tony's hands hadn't been in some time.

He said nothing, only hoped the dumb guard wouldn't reach for his hair. It had been styled to hide his ears. To hide the earpiece Tony made that had been secured there. Words of reassurance and praise were spoken softly into his ear.

"He's clean," the giant of a man announced in a deep, gruff voice that reminded Loki of Thor.

"Stay here, dumbass," she said to the guard, stalking straight up to Loki.

He looked away from her to stare pointedly at the fat-fingered hand curled around the biceps of his right arm. "This is a very expensive suit," he pointed out, a black brow arched high over a harsh eye.

"Shut up!" Loki jerked his head back at the shout, wincing at the stink of smoke lingering from Moira's mouth as she had moved in close. "Where the hell is my money?"

Loki didn't respond fast enough, apparently, as he was jostled around by the guard. "The lady asked you a question."

"Zip it. Let me talk." She didn't yell the words in Loki's face this time, thankfully. But those eerie green eyes, too wide and too bright, bore into him. "Well?"

Loki sighed, leaned his head back. "There is a briefcase on the floor beside my chair, that —" He didn't get to finish, as Moira turned away, hair whipping about, to grab the silver case. "You won’t be able to open it," Loki said with a smirk, his tone flat and listless, almost bored.

"The hell I can't." She slammed the case on top of the coffee table and went still as she stared at it, and the two-line keypad on the handle. "What the hell is this?"

Loki grinned smugly, head held high. "Stark technology at it's best, my dear. The case can only be opened by a four-digit code." He aimed the smug expression at her. "A code which only I know. And I will give it to you, after."

Moira straightened, a disgusted face screwing up her usually pretty features. "After what?"

"After we set some new conditions." Loki saw the incredulity flash across her face before it was gone and she gave a nod to the guard. A shift from the man beside him, then Loki heard the cocking of a gun quite close to his ear. He spared it a side glance, that belied the fear that struck him down to his core, and slid his eyes back to Moira. She smiled. "You won't allow him to kill me. You need me. Without me, you cannot open that case," he said with a nod to the silver briefcase.

"I'll shoot it open," she answered with a shrug.

Loki sighed with feigned impatience. "It is made of a near indestructible titanium alloy, Moira. You can shoot it, you can burn it, you could have this ogre of a man jump up and down on it for hours. You will never get it open."

The room went silent for a moment, Moira and her guard having a silent conversation while Loki stood there between them. "Sit," she finally said, doing so herself on the sofa adjacent to Loki's chair. Giving the guard a side glance, Loki waited for him to release his hold of his arm — and to uncock his weapon — then took his seat again. "Amuse me. What are these new conditions?" Moira asked, a smile as real as her name widening her lips, one shapely leg crossing over the other.

Loki’s own grin matched hers in realness. "You return Anthony's arc reactors —undamaged," he amended with a finger pointed in the air, then flicked his fingers toward the case. "You take your money, plus an additional five million, and remove yourself."

Moira's face turned to stone. "…What?"

"S.H.I.E.L.D., or any other judicial body, will not prosecute you for the unlawful entry to our home, the stealing of government-owned technology, or the plot of extortion if, and only if, you remove yourself from the country. The agency will keep track of you and should you return, the moment your foot hits American soil, you will be apprehended and tried for all of these crimes."

She stared open-mouthed for several seconds. "Are you serious?"

"Quite. And I am sure you're aware, with an agency such as S.H.I.E.LD. there is no such thing as a statute of limitations."

Moira stared at him, snapping her mouth shut in a tight line. She looked away finally, blowing out a long breath. Then started laughing. It started off a tickled chuckle and grew into an annoying guffaw. Loki let her continue for a few moments. Until he got bored.

"Is this maniacal laughter your way of agreeing to the terms?"

"No!" She chuckled once more and turned to face him fully. “Are you kidding me with this, Loki? You have nothing to bargain with. Maybe you know about my past as a woman of the night; I paid my debt for that. Maybe you go to the police, or S.H.I.E.L.D., or whoever, and tell them this crazy story about a hooker bent on revenge.”

“I am not sure it is as absurd as you believe.”

Moira rolled her eyes and leaned on the arm of the sofa, toward him. “The point is, Loki, you and your idiot husband, can’t prove anything. You can’t connect me to the break-in. Your proof had his throat slit in his cell.”

Loki didn’t have to pretend his disgust for that revelation was real. Dangerous as the man was, he didn’t deserve to die like that.

“You can’t prove it was me that sent those letters. I went through a lot of trouble to make sure they couldn’t be traced back to me.” She lifted her shoulders and sat back, her grin arrogant. “Without anything to threaten me with, why would I ever agree to those terms?”

“You’re right. We have no proof…,” Loki lamented. He sighed softly, defeated. “Of course…” Lifting his eyes to Moira once more, Loki slowly let his lips curve as he started to speak. “It might help if…somehow, you were on record admitting to all of this.” His name was a shout in his ear.

Moira’s face fell, muscle by muscle, her jaw going slack, her eyes growing wide. “How?” is all she could muster.

“My idiot husband’s little secret,” he spat, his tone laced with venom. In his ear, Fury confirmed they had everything on tape, though he sounded stressed. Loki relaxed. Minutely. “You’re finished, Moira.”

For a moment, Loki believed he had her. The woman looked spitting mad, her face going red with anger. She rose, and Loki followed her with his eyes as she moved to the window directly across from him, peeking out through the curtains. “Get the others!" She shouted to the guard. "Tell me how, goddamn it! How have they been listening?” Her hands made the curtains flutter around her as she turned away, glaring at Loki. “You don’t have a wire. How the fuck are they listening?”

_ Coulson is on his way with a team _ , Loki heard in his ear. Calmly, he crossed one leg over the other and laced his fingers in his lap. "Like you, when you were a hooker, as you so succinctly put it, I will never reveal my tricks."

Moira fumed. Her eyes moved to the door as it opened and another large dark suited man entered the room. Loki was hauled up from his chair again, but before he could gain his balance a fat fist landed a swift punch across his face. Another came down before he could catch his breath.

"Tell me, right now," Moira nearly cooed from somewhere behind the punching guard. "And I'll call them off."

Loki panted, tasting blood in his mouth. He couldn't answer; he was seeing stars and pain — sharp, blinding pain — had his jaw throbbing. Seeing it as more reluctance, Moira barked another order and the second guard pummeled his fist into Loki's stomach. Fury was saying something in his ear, but Loki was too busy fighting the urge to vomit to hear it clearly. His body had slumped forward, and he leaned heavily on the guard for a moment, before he was pushed off, and he fell back into the arms of the other.

"Come on, Loki. I don't have all day. I want my money!"

Loki was able to steady himself, though the guard behind him still had a grip on his arm. Straightening, he swiped a knuckle over the corner of his mouth, chuckling darkly when he pulled his hand back and saw the blood staining his finger. "We all want things, Moira."

She practically growled. "Again!"

Loki braced himself as the guard reared back and dealt another hard blow to his face. He cried out as his body was thrown with the force, and would have fallen but for the other man holding onto him. And when he opened his eyes, he watched the earpiece tumble to the floor. A loud gasp sounded in the room, prompting Loki to glance up at Moira.  _ Shit _ , he thought, when her face darkened. She shoved at the guard, and he easily hauled Loki aside so the woman could crush the piece with her heeled shoe. "Damn," Loki whispered to himself.

“You two think you’re so clever, don’t you?”

Loki let out a sigh, low and long, his body already aching from the beating it had taken. “It’s over, Moira. They’ve got you on tape. And now that you’ve destroyed the connection to me, it’ll be moments before they come for you.”

“Liar!” She was panicking, Loki could tell. Her cheeks were flushed, her eyes too wide. He had to fight not to wince or flinch when she brought her face close to his. “It’s over when I say it’s over. It’s over when I get my goddamn money!”

The whole room went eerily still at an impatient knock on the hotel room door. Loki and Moira even exchanged a confused look. Whomever it was, they were not expected. Moira looked at the guard behind Loki and jerked her head toward the door. While he moved toward it, leaving Loki in the other guard’s hands, she moved back to the window, uneasily searching the grounds outside it. The man who appeared to be Moira’s head guard reentered the room, in a rush, taking the woman aside to speak quietly to her. Loki watched them carefully, straining to hear what they were saying. It worried him that he couldn’t communicate — however one-sided it was — with S.H.I.E.L.D., but he had to comfort himself with the knowledge that they were close. But that tiny sliver of panic started to rise again when Moira pushed past her man and approached him, a sordid smile twisting her lips.

“I’m not overly fond of that look on your face,” he commented softly.

“New deal on the table, pretty boy.” She crossed her arms, and Loki hoped her overconfidence would come back to bite her in the ass. He eyed the guard, then looked back at Moira and shrugged nonchalantly.

“I highly doubt it would be anything better than what I already offered, but, please…feel free to attempt to change my mind.”

Moira groaned, rolled her eyes. “You and that fancy talk. You always thought you were better than me. Here’s what’s gonna happen, honey. You’re gonna call off S.H.I.E.L.D. I’m gonna take the money in that case there, and then I’ll  _ think  _ about returning the reactors.” Loki fought again not to cringe as she leaned close, her face inches from his own. “And…you’re going to call Tony and tell him to sign over his shares to Stark Industries to me. Immediately.”

Loki blinked. And started laughing. “You must be joking. There is no way I would ever ask Anthony to do that. Nor would I let him. Even if it meant my freedom.”

“Hmm.” Moira breathed a small laugh and took a few steps back, shaking her head. “Oh, I think I can make you change your mind.” She turned to her guard. “Do it.”

At her command, Loki tensed, expecting to be hit again or dragged off somewhere, and prepared to fight back if it was called for. Instead, he felt his stomach plummet to his feet, struggling against the guard’s hands, his mind screaming  _ No! _ as the first guard reentered the room…hauling Sebastian with him.


	16. Daddy's Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natasha and Clint arrive at the Stark house, with the whole family, to wait alongside Tony for news about Loki. And are there when he learns about Loki’s connection to S.H.I.E.L.D. being cut unexpectedly. Back at the hotel, Moira delights at gaining just a bit more leverage.

Once Loki was gone, and after he allowed himself a good twenty minutes to calm down — and maybe he let out those tears burning in his throat — Tony wandered down to the lab. He tried fixing up that old arc reactor. But he got bored with it fast. He went out to the garage and decided to inspect the ignition and fuel systems in his car. But it wasn’t taking his mind off Loki or the anxiety driving him absolutely mad waiting to hear it was all over. He finally gave up and went back into the house, rummaging through the refrigerator for something to eat. He had just decided on a red apple when the doorbell rang. He was heading for it, taking a bite as he went, and heard the pounding footsteps coming down the stairs.

“Freeze.” He mumble-shouted around the bits of apple in his mouth. Jazz stopped just before he reached the door.

“Aw, Dad…”

“Move it, Jazz cat.” Tony mussed the boy’s hair as he passed, taking another bite of the apple as he opened the door.

“About frickin’ time,” Natasha grumbled as she pushed into the house. “Hey, kid,” she said to Jazz.

“Hi, Auntie Tasha.” Jazz perked up considerably when he saw Rowan trailing in behind his aunt. “Hey, Ro!”

"Hi!"

“Whoa,” Tony stepped back as the rest of the Barton clan filed in. “What are you doing here?”

Natasha turned, clearly finding the task difficult with the ball of weight at her waist, and glared at him. “Did you really think I was gonna sit at home waiting to hear from you? I came to keep you company and fret.”

Tony started to protest, but Clint clamped a hand on his shoulder, taking his attention from Natasha aiming to make herself comfortable in his living room. “Don’t fight it, man. At least we brought pizza.” Clint gave his version of a smile and gestured with the pizza box in his hand.

“And chicken wings!” Rowan offered, holding up his own box.

"Is Bash here, Uncle Tony?” A soft voice asked from behind him.

“Uh...Jesus…” Tony sighed, as Clint and Rowan headed for the kitchen with Jazz tagging along, and glanced at Ana, who was carrying Xander in her arms. “Yeah, he’s up in his — Bash!”

“He’s not up there.” Jazz offered from his perch on a stool, waiting for someone to give him the go-ahead to grab a slice of pizza.

Tony frowned Jazz’s way. “What do you mean he’s not up there? Where is he?”

Jazz shrugged. His eyes bugged out when Clint set a paper plate in front of him with the biggest piece of pizza he’d ever had for himself. “Whoa…”

“Jazz.”

“What? I don’t know. He left right before  _ Pappa _ did. I thought he was going to Uncle Clint and Auntie Tasha’s.”

Tony swore to himself, irritation seeping in. He didn’t need to deal with Bash’s shit today. Not when he was concerned about Loki’s well-being. Blowing out a breath he looked at Ana again. “You really don’t know where he is?”

“No,” she answered with a half laugh and a shake of her head.

He eyed her closely for a second, but seeing the slight worry in those big eyes, he decided she was either a very good actress or she was telling him the truth. “All right, go. Go put Xander down and get some pizza. I should go wake up Audi.”

Ana nodded, hefting Xander up on her hip, and wandered into the living room to pass him off to Natasha. Tony climbed the steps to the second floor and headed for Audrey’s room, finding her still sleeping peacefully. She’d been asleep for about two hours, so he figured she’d be in a better mood. He hoped. He woke her gently and lifted her into his arms to carry her downstairs.

Tony had hoped she would perk up when she saw everyone visiting and the pizza, but she was still groggy and didn’t want to leave his arms. So Tony carried her with him as he went into Loki’s office, and cradled her in his lap as he pulled out his cell phone to call Sebastian’s. It went straight to voicemail.

“Bash. Where the hell are you? Get your ass home  _ now _ . I don’t have time to deal with you taking off like this today. You call me the second you get this. And come home!” Ending the call, Tony shoved his phone into his pocket, and taking one deep, cleansing breath, he prepared himself to be a social host…

When all he really wanted to do was curl up in bed, waiting for Loki to walk through that door.

* * *

_ “No!” _  Loki found his voice again and lunged toward the guard holding Sebastian.

“Hold him back!”

His fear soared, questions tumbled over each other in his mind, and Loki, a usual wordsmith, was unable to form any coherent sentences. Loki glared at Moira when she smirked at him, and growled when she cooly ran the back of her hand down Sebastian’s cheek. He cringed and flinched visibly away from her touch, turning big, damp eyes to Loki, audibly gasping at Loki's likely bruised and bloodied face.

_ "Pappa...?" _

“Let him go,” he managed through trembling lips.

“Oh, I don’t think so,” Moira nearly giggled. “This is my ticket to gold. And freedom."

Loki didn't know whether to sob or scream. “S.H.I.E.L.D. are on their way. You’re finished, Moira! Holding my son hostage will gain you nothing. Let. Him. Go.”

She tapped a finger to her chin. “Mmm, no, but thanks for asking. I think I’ll keep him close by.” She smiled sweetly, making Loki’s stomach turn, and started barking orders, demanding her men find her something to tie them up, and getting Loki a phone to call Tony. He was forced back into his chair and Sebastian was forced into a chair across from him, the one Moira had occupied only moments earlier.

Loki wanted to know what he was doing there, how he’d gotten himself caught up in this mess his fathers were trying to fix. But the look of fear on Sebastian’s face broke his heart, the tracks of the tears he’d already shed making his jaw clench. “Sebastian,” he said loud enough so he would hear, but soft enough that it wouldn't draw the others' attention.

Those big green eyes shot to him and Loki could see him struggling not to start bawling. As grown up as he always seemed, at the moment, he'd never looked younger. He was ashen and shaking.

_ “Er du skadet?"  _ Chin trembling, Sebastian shook his head. A whispered 'no' followed.

"Call Tony," Moira commanded, holding her own phone out to Loki, while her men zip-tied his wrists and ankles to the chair arms and legs.

Loki glared up at her, wincing at the pain that shot down the side of his face. "No."

She scoffed, rolled her eyes. "Why must you be so difficult? Fine. You wanna wait for S.H.I.E.L.D. to come busting up the place, we will. But I still need to talk to Tony."

"This is pointless, Moira," Loki nearly shouted. She was directing her men into position — one standing by inside the room with her, one just outside the hotel door, the others at key entrances to the hallway, he overheard — and spared him a glance.

"You know what I find pointless?" She wandered back, resting a hand on the back of Sebastian's chair. "Your trust in the agency that almost killed your son eight years ago."

"Shut up," Loki growled. Sebastian's head twisted to look at Moira then he straightened to look at Loki, a pleading look in his eyes. " _ Elskling…pust _ ."

Sebastian looked on the verge of a panic attack. He was breathing too fast, and pulling at the ties holding his hands together in his lap. Thankfully, they hadn't tied him to the chair. "What...what is she…? What…?"

_ "Ikke hør på henne." _

"But she said..."

"What is that?" Moira looked to her guard who only shrugged. "What are you saying? Stop it."

_ "Hør på meg," _ Loki continued to speak to Sebastian, to calm him, ignoring Moira's confusion. " _ Jeg elsker deg. Vi vil komme oss ut herfra. Bare hold fast. _ "

"Stop that! Shut up!" Moira looked around frantically, then suddenly remembered she had a scarf on. Pulling it from around her neck she waved it at the guard. "Shut him up," she demanded.

"No — _Ikke få panikk_ , Sebastian. _Hjelpen er på vei!_ ” Loki continued to shout at his son, repeatedly telling him not to panic, that help was on the way, and struggled against the guard’s hands as he tied the scarf around his head, effectively muffling his words. He shot a dark glare at the man then aimed it at Moira as she pulled up a chair next to Sebastian’s.

“Sebastian,” she cooed. “So you're the big brother. The firstborn.” She slid an arm around the boy when he tried to lean away from her, even as he nodded. “Stay close, Sebastian. So…did your fathers ever tell you about me? They knew me as Amy back then. Or Amora. Do you know who I am?” Sebastian shook his head no, his lips in a tight line as he fought to control his tears. Moira scoffed, insulted. She squinted her eyes at Loki, trying for a menacing look and trailed a finger along Sebastian’s forearm. “How rude of them. Especially since it was me who cemented their relationship. Didn’t I, Loki?”

He growled again, shaking his head. She laughed.

“Tell me the truth, Sebastian: do you love one of your dads more than the other?” Her lips curved when he turned his head to her, his expression confused. “You can tell me, it’s okay. Do you love Tony more than that one?” She jerked her head Loki’s way.

“No,” Sebastian managed to say.

“No? Huh. Do you remember what your dad was like before Tony came back?”

“I don’t —”

“Do you remember that man that your dad dated before Tony? Shut up,” she shouted at Loki when he tried to speak behind the scarf. “Do you remember that man, Sebastian?” She softened her voice as she spoke to him, brushed her fingers through his hair. Loki grunted. Sebastian tried to jerk away.

“Not — not really…”

“Hm. Do you remember being locked in a room all alone? Crying for your Daddy? But he never came?”

“Mm!” Loki jerked in the chair, moving it, nearly tipping it over. He stopped when Sebastian looked up meeting his eyes. And started to breathe heavily again. “Mm-mm!” he mumbled, shaking his head.

“Keep him quiet, would you?” Loki’s muffled yelling continued until he heard the gun being cocked at his temple.

“ _ Pappa _ . What…is she…talking…ab-bout?” Sebastian was on the verge of hyperventilating. He looked to Moira with big eyes, nearly gasping for air. “P-please…let us…go…please?” Dropping his head, Sebastian began to ramble in Norwegian, repeating his pleas to Moira to release them. Loki yelled his name behind the scarf, but he was lost to his panic and fear.

Letting out frustrated grunt, Moira rose and stomped over to Loki, ripping off the scarf. “Tell him to shut up already.”

He shot her a glare. “You're frightening him. He doesn't remember that day." He looked to Sebastian now, calling his name softly. " _ Elskling. Pust. Jeg trenger deg til å roe ned, min kjærlighet. _ Sebastian! Listen to me! You’re going to hyperventilate. Calm. Down.” Loki was still trying to ease Sebastian’s fears when one of Moira’s men came running back into the room.

“They’re here. A line of black cars just pulled up. They’ve started evacuating guests.”

For a moment, Loki thought he saw a look of fright pass over Moira’s face. “Get back out there. Keep them out of this building. Go!” The guard obeyed and Moira went to Loki, pushing him into the back of the chair. “Why would they do that? Why wouldn’t they just burst in here or start shooting or something?”

He grinned darkly. “Perhaps they have learned from their past mistakes…”

A trill of the hotel phone had the room going silent, but for Sebastian’s soft crying. But even that died down as the phone continued to ring. Loki’s eyes moved to the phone and back to Moira. And prayed to the gods that it was S.H.I.E.L.D. on the other line.

* * *

Tony’s thumb punched the screen of his StarkPhone again, keeping it on speaker as he tried Sebastian. Again. For the upteenth time. He made an angry noise in his throat, hearing Sebastian’s voicemail message. Again. For the upteenth time. He looked up when a ball banged against the window of Loki’s office. He decided it would be a waste of breath to yell at the kids playing outside, since they knew better anyway. And Rowan yelled a muffled “Sorry!” through the window as he retrieved the ball, anyway. Tony lifted a hand, giving a tiny wave, then fumbled with his phone as it started to ring. He answered without looking at the name.

“Sebastian!”

_ “No… Stark?” _

Tony fought not to roll his eyes. There could be news after all. “Yeah, Fury. What’s going on? Is the meeting over?”

_ “...Not exactly.” _

Foreboding. A strong sense of foreboding had Tony sitting back in the chair — in Loki’s chair. “What happened?”

_ “Ms. Khan must have found the earpiece. The connection to Loki has been truncated.” _

“What? How — you…” A flurry of questions came flying from his mouth; too fast for the director to adequately answer. "How could you let this happen? I thought you people were professionals!"

_ “Stark! Shut up!” _

“Don’t tell me to shut up! That’s my husband down there! With that psychopathic — god! You know what? Once again I foolishly trust in S.H.I.E.L.D. to help my family, and once again, I get fucked over. Screw you and your trained agents, Fury. I’m going down there myself!”

_ “Stark, don’t do anything —” _

Tony ended the call before Fury could finish what was inevitably a warning. Taking several moments to compose himself, to clear the angry tears from his face — and silence Fury’s returned call — Tony stepped out of Loki’s office, and as calmly as he could, asked Natasha and Clint to come to the office. By the time they reached the room, Natasha waddling in, a hand pressed to her back, Tony was in the middle of pacing.

Clint's usual resting expression was now a frown. “What’s wrong?”

Tony stopped, faced them. “Did Ana notice you come in?” he asked, unconsciously lowering his voice.

“Why?” Natasha questioned before Clint could say anything.

“I don’t want her to hear.”

“She’s busy with…Xander.” Clint glanced at his wife when she laid a hand over his arm and gripped his wrist tightly.

“Hear what?”

Tony’s eyes dropped to their joined hands then moved between their faces. “Loki’s connection to S.H.I.E.L.D. got cut.”

“Oh, no…”

Natasha inhaled sharply, leaning into Clint when his arm went around her. “Now what?”

“I’m going down there.” He ignored their dropped jaws, plowing through as he walked back around the desk to snatch up his phone. “I need you both to stay here and keep the kids occupied.”

“Yeah, of course,” Clint agreed immediately.

“Wait.” Both men turned to Natasha. “I don’t like this. You don’t have any idea what you’ll be walking into. What did S.H.I.E.L.D. say? Was it a clean break? Was there a struggle? And where the hell is Bash? How could you lose sight of him today, of all days, Tony?”

“Natasha, stop.”

“No —”

“Hey!” Tony slammed his fist to the desk, rattling the neatly placed items atop it, knocking over a frame with a picture of the five of them at the beach two years before. When Audi was still a toddler. “I know this was a shit day for Bash to disappear on me. I’ve been calling him, but I’ve been a little preoccupied, okay?” Natasha huffed softly and shrugged off Clint’s hands. “Now, look, I need to go down there. I need to make sure Loki’s okay and that I can get him out of there. She’s probably pissed it wasn’t me anyway. But I need to know that Jazz and Audi are safe with you here. I can’t be worried about them. And Bash. And Loki. Please, Natasha?”

She glared at him for several long moments then rolled her eyes. “Yes, of course, you idiot,” she scoffed. “Go. Go get him and bring his stupid ass home.”

Stuffing his phone in his pocket, Tony started around the desk and headed for the door. Steps away, Natasha grunted softly, arching her back, a hand pressed to her belly, and both Clint and Tony froze. “Baby…?” Clint held his arms out to her.

She breathed out slowly, then waved a hand at Tony. “I’m fine, I’m fine. Go, go!”

Tony nodded and pulled open the door to the office, all the way so Clint and Natasha could easily walk out. He was halfway through the kitchen when Audi came running back into the house. And straight to him, attaching herself to his leg. “Daddy, come play with me.”

“I can’t, Monkey. Not right now.” He bent to peel her off of him, lifting her by the arms to press a kiss to her cheek. “But you go back and play with your cousins, all right?” He kissed her again and set her on her feet.

“No, Daddy. I wanna play with you. Don’t go.”

“Audrey…” Tony held up a hand to quiet Natasha and dropped to a knee in front of Audrey.

“Baby doll, I want to play with you, I do. But I gotta…I gotta go do a thing. With  _ Pappa _ , actually. And when I get home, I promise, we’ll play whatever game you want.”

She smiled, showing a perfect row of baby teeth, and Tony swore he saw Loki's mischievousness in that little face. “Can I put bows and ribbons in your hair?”

A loud snort was heard, and Tony glared over Audi’s head at Clint. “Yes, Monkey. If you want to. But I gotta go, all right?” He started to rise, but her tiny little fingers clenched in his shirt.

“Bring me back something pretty?”

He playfully narrowed an eye. “Does your  _ Pappa _ count?”

She giggled, “No.”

“All right, fine. I’ll see what I can do.” He grabbed her head, pulled her forward to kiss her forehead. “I love you.”

“I know!” She declared, and as quickly as she had run to him, she was running away again.

There was a small sting there, but he had to brush it aside. Trusting Clint and Natasha to watch over the kids, he advised them to help themselves to anything in the kitchen — as if they didn’t know their way around already — and rushed out to his car. Once he’d made it to the freeway, Tony dialed Coulson.

_ “Coulson.” _

“Give me the room number,” Tony demanded, unceremoniously, not bothering with a greeting. It wasn’t a friendly call.

_ “Stark?” _

“Give me the room number, Phil.”

_ ”Tony. Trust me, we’ve got this, okay? Don’t come down here and —” _

“Give me the fucking number, Phil!” Coulson sighed on the other side and gave him the number. And when he tried again to talk Tony out of going to the hotel, Tony hung up on him. “Jarvis, get me a line into that room.”

_ ”Right away, sir.” _

* * *

“Answer it,” Moira instructed one of her goons.

Loki looked to Sebastian, frustrated he couldn’t break free of these ties to go to his own son, as the man dropped the gun from beside Loki’s temple and crossed over to answer the phone. “Sebastian…?”

Moira shoved at Loki’s shoulder again. “Shut up.”

“Go to Hel, you maniacal bitch,” he spat back at her, only inciting her to laugh.

“Kiss your son with that mouth?”

“Moira.” She looked at the guard and he held the receiver out to her. “It’s him.” The guard’s eyes dropped to Loki. “His husband.”

Relief flooded through Loki, but he kept the scowl on his face, eyes locked on Moira as she sashayed her way to the guard. Smug bitch. He glanced at Sebastian, jaw muscles clenching at the way he sat, hands clasped tightly in his lap, head lowered. Tear drops stained his jeans where they seemed to fall endlessly. He returned his attention to Moira, if only to keep the tears from his own eyes. She looked back at him as she brought the phone to her ear.

"Hello, lover," she purred into it.

_ "Put Loki on the phone." _

"No." She pouted, crossed one arm over her middle. "You have some explaining to do, honey bunch."

_ "Stop calling me those ridiculous names. I say nothing until I know he's okay. Put. Him. On." _

Rolling her eyes, Moira carried the phone to Loki and put it up to his ear. "Talk. And make it quick."

Loki's eyes didn't leave hers even as he leaned into the receiver. "Anthony."

_ "Babe! Are you all right? What happened to the —” _

"Anthony, Sebastian is here," he broke in, speaking quickly. He heard a breathless gasp escape his husband over the line.

_ "What? How?" _

_ "I'm not sure; they dragged him in here and tied him —" _

"That's enough." Moira was almost cheery as she took the phone from his ear and brought it to hers, moving away from Loki when he struggled again against his restraints.

"Anthony!"

_ "Loki! No —!" _

"Excuse you. My turn. You know he's fine. So explain to me exactly why he's here and you're not."

Tony was breathing fast and heavy, fear and panic evident in his voice. "How the hell did you get your slimy hands on my kid?"

Throwing her head of blonde hair back, Moira laughed, and wandered toward Sebastian. When she reached him, she nudged his head back, and began to toy with the strands of his hair. "I didn't do a damn thing, Tony. He literally popped up on my doorstep. You see, my men were expecting  _ you _ and that ridiculous hot rod you drive; not Loki and the family station wagon."

_ "Fuck you, that's a damn good car." _

She snickered. "Anyway…the sweep of his car was a tad delayed. Imagine their surprise when they open the door and find your boy huddled in the backseat." She cupped Sebastian's chin, giving it a pinch before flicking his face away.

Sebastian looked at Loki, embarrassed and sniffling. " _ Jeg beklager _ ," he mumbled to his father. Loki's lips parted to speak but before he could, Moira's hand curled into Sebastian's dark hair, yanking his head back roughly.

"Shut up!"

"Unhand him!"

_ "What are you doing? Leave him alone!" _

Moira smirked at Loki, moving behind the chair, running her red-tipped nails along Sebastian's cheek now. And kissed the top of his head. "Get your ass over here and find out, Tony. We've a lot to discuss and it seems I'm running out of time. You're not here in fifteen minutes, your kid is gonna pay for it."

Loki watched, horrified at her declaration, as she hung up on Tony. His expression darkened instantaneously. "You harm one hair on my son's head…"

Moira's laugh was loud, one obnoxiously so in the relative quiet of the room. "And what are you gonna do? You're tied to a chair, Loki. You couldn't do a thing if you tried. All you can do is watch." Those green eyes, snakelike and venomous, slid over to the guard, and she motioned with her head for him to move over to Loki. While she took her seat beside Sebastian's chair once again. "Hi, there," she said sweetly to him. He cringed away from her, watching her with weary eyes. She smiled softly, running her hand along his forearm. "Relax, hon. I'm sure your dad will get here soon. He loves you, right? He wouldn't let anything happen to you. Would he?"

Sebastian swallowed visibly and looked to Loki for reassurance. "He'll be here," Loki said with a firm nod. It gave Sebastian the assurance he needed. With watery eyes, Sebastian looked at Moira and nodded. "He'll be here," he whispered.

"Tell me something, Loki." She sat back in the chair, settling into it, and ran her fingers through Sebastian's hair just above his ear. Much like Loki had done to Tony earlier that day. It made his stomach twist painfully. The chair brushed along the plush carpet as he shoved forward, hands reaching out for Sebastian. "Why didn't you tell little Sebastian here about me? Hmm?"

"Would you tell your child about the wretch that tried to separate you and and the man you loved?"

"Sassy as ever," she murmured with a smirk. "And who paid me to do that, Loki? Huh?" She grinned triumphantly as Sebastian’s eyes darted between her and Loki. "Oh, that's right. Your grandfather." She pinched Sebastian's cheek but he shoved her hand away with his shoulder.

Loki swore under his breath, glancing away in disgust. When he looked up, Moira had reached for Sebastian's face again, turning it this way and that. He wanted to break every single one of her fingers.

"God, you look so much like him when I met him," she marveled. Sebastian sniffled, but his lips twitched, a ghost of a smile inching them up. "Are you as much of an effeminate bitch as he is?" His jaw dropped, those watery green flaring.

"Curse you, Moira!" Barely a second passed after he spoke the words, and Loki had a fist pummeling into his stomach.

"Stop it!" Sebastian shouted, nearly leaping out of his chair. But Moira was there, pulling him back down. And laughing.

"Ooh, look who suddenly found his voice."

He jerked his arm away from her but she held on. "Leave my father alone,  _ kjerring! _ "

"Sebastian!" Loki's voice was strained as he sat hunched over his now sore stomach. "Watch your mouth."

"Seriously?!"

Moira roughly grabbed Sebastian's head, turning it toward her. "What did you call me, you little brat?" Sebastian struggled against her hands, but pinched his lips tight. And earned a smack across the face.

"Don't!"

"You little shit."

"Bitch," Sebastian muttered under his breath, though his eyes filled with tears again. Moira jumped to her feet, fisting one hand in his shirt, and pulling the other back, ready to strike Sebastian again, this time with her fist.

"Moira. Wait."

She paused at Loki's soft voice and looked at him, turning and lowering her arm. He sighed, heavily, weakly. "Could we stop this? Just…please. Leave him be." He grunted softly, shifting in the chair. "Perhaps we could come to an agreement before Anthony arrives."

Curious, Moira released Sebastian, cocking a brow as she straightened. "Why? What's with the change of heart? Why before Tony gets here?"

Loki inhaled, eyes closing over as he held it. When he opened his eyes, he settled his gaze on Sebastian, and let out his breath on a long, soft sigh. "I'm so sorry." Sebastian blinked, black brows coming together as he flicked a glance Moira's way before looking back at Loki, a question on his lips. Loki squared his shoulders, seemingly steeling himself, as he lifted his face to look up at Moira. "Because…it's over. I'm…I'm leaving him." His jaw clenched as Moira's eyes lit up. "I can put up with a lot, but…this was the last straw. We — we wanted to settle things with you before we told the children."

Sebastian made a noise, a quiet, broken whimper, and Moira spun around to see his chin trembling, big eyes filled and ready to spill over. " _ Pappa…? _ "

" _ Jeg er så lei meg, elskling _ ," Loki spoke, his voice breaking as he did.

A wicked, sickening gleam in her eye, Moira approached Loki slowly. A cat ready to pounce. "Are you serious? You really gonna leave him? Are you gonna divorce him? Please tell me you're gonna divorce him."

Loki tore his eyes from his heartbroken son, jaw clenching, and when he spoke again he did so through his teeth. "I am going to take him to court for everything he's got." He paused, rolled his eyes a little. "Everything you don't manage to get your hands on, that is."

She laughed again, the laugh of a lunatic. It sent shivers up Loki's spine. "Excellent."

A cry, soft and choked off, drew Loki's attention. He looked at Sebastian, his arms flinching, instinctively moving to want to comfort and soothe. "Sebastian…" Sebastian brought his bound hands to his face, muffling his sobs behind them. "Moira. Untie me. Please. Let me get to my son."

_ She looked between the two, deliberating. Her head shot up, and the room went still again, as someone knocked incessantly on the door. "No," she breathed, her lips curling in a feral smile. "Looks like Daddy's home." _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translations (apologies if they aren't actually correct. I tried other sites besides google translate lol)  
> Er du skadet? = Are you hurt?  
> Elskling = darling  
> Pust = breathe  
> Ikke hør på henne = Don't listen to her.  
> Hør på meg = Listen to me.  
> Jeg elsker deg = I love you.  
> Vi vil komme oss ut herfra = We'll get out of here.  
> Bare hold fast = Just hold on.  
> Ikke få panikk = Don't panic  
> Hjelpen er på vei = Help is on the way  
> Jeg trenger deg til å roe ned, min kjærlighet = I need you to calm down, my love  
> Jeg beklager = I'm sorry  
> kjerring = crone  
> Jeg er så lei meg = I'm so sorry


	17. One Shot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony arrives at Moira’s suite and Moira continues to reveal things to Sebastian that Loki would rather leave in the past.

Agent Phil Coulson came through.  _ For once _ , Tony thought with a sneer. Apparently, the S.H.I.E.L.D. agent had called in a favor and sent two police cruisers to catch up with him, providing an escort to the hotel. It cut down greatly on his driving time — not that Tony would admit to that. His tires screeched as he pulled to a stop behind the line of black, unmarked cars, and was out of it before the engine had completely died and storming up to Coulson.

"Mr. Stark," he greeted genially. "Why don't you take a deep breath, okay?"

"Deep breath? You want me to take a deep breath, Coulson? Fuck you! My fucking kid is in there!" was Tony’s response. The shock that registered across Coulson's face only served to deepen Tony’s fear. “How do I know this before you? Aren’t you doing any kind of surveillance here?”

Coulson threw up his hands, to calm, to ward off. Tony didn’t give a fuck. "Whoa, whoa, whoa. What are you talking about? Which kid?"

"Bash! Bash is in there!"

Coulson’s brow furrowed and Tony could see his lashes moving behind the dark lenses he wore. "H-how did he…—  _ how? _ "

"Ugh…I don't — he snuck into Loki's car. And don’t give me shit about that,” he rattled off before Coulson could speak. “I’ll get enough when Natasha finds out he slipped in there right under my goddamn nose.”

Coulson’s lips snapped shut and his expression told Tony he was trying not to laugh or smile. Tony watched him with a near-glare as he composed himself then finally asked, “Is he all right?”

Focused on Bash again, Tony sighed. “I don’t know. Moira. I think she hit him when I was on the phone with her.”

Coulson blanched. “You spoke to her?” Tony jerked his shoulders in answer. “Is Loki okay? What are they doing in there? She’s got her guys blocking off the building. They’ve got handguns, as far as we can tell. We’ve got snipers but this place isn’t really conducive to aerial shots, you know?” He looked up at the palm trees surrounding them, swaying lightly in the spring breeze.

Tony released a frustrated sigh and threw out a hand to another agent passing by, stopping their fast walk. “You got a knife?” It was a female agent he’d stopped, and he watched her gaze flick to Coulson, questioning. “Hey. Don’t worry about permission here. That’s my husband and my kid in there So, one more time, do you have a knife? Nothing major, I’m not looking for Crocodile Dundee’s blade here. Just a little pocket knife will do.”

The agent’s dark eyes, unflinching in their stare, stayed on Tony as she reached down and pulled a small blade from a notch on the side of her thigh and handed it over. Tony took it, testing the weight of it.

“Perfect. Thanks.”

“Tony.” He looked at Coulson and tucked the knife into the sleeve of his zip-up sweater, palming the handle.

“Don’t, Phil. I don't need a lecture. I’m not going in there without something to fight with besides my brain. She tied my kid up to something or somewhere. If I can slip this to Loki, maybe I can distract Looney Tunes long enough to let him get to Bash.”

“And if Loki’s tied up too?”

His jaw clenched. “Then he can get himself out. He’s better with knives than I am anyway. He is the chef of the house after all.” He smirked softly.

“Tony…”

“I’m going in,” he insisted firmly then turned and started for the building, but Coulson snagged his arm.

“Tony! What if they check you?”

“I won’t give them a chance.”

“Stark! Come on. You know I can’t let you go in there. You’re not equipped to deal with a hostage negotiation.”

“I wasn’t the last time either.” Coulson’s fingers eased but he didn’t remove them; a quick flicker of guilt swept over his face. “We came out fine then…if a little bruised,” he allowed softly, swallowing the emotion that rushed up at the thought. “Just tell Fury I hit you.” He shook off the man’s hand and let a chuckle slip when he heard Coulson’s shouted retort of  _ “Like he’d believe that.” _

Tony was surprisingly calm as he approached the building that encompassed Moira’s large suite and one other. Thankfully, the other one’s inhabitants were either out for the day or it was empty. Hopefully, this time there wouldn’t be a shootout. He wondered, as he reached the room, if he should have alerted someone to his imminent arrival. The man at the door, one he didn’t recognize, pulled it open as Tony approached and the engineer stepped in.  _ Never mind _ , he thought with a mental shrug. The hallway stretched out before him and it was eerily quiet but for the hum of an ice machine he passed. He reached the door, eyeing the man standing guard — one of the men that was with Moira at the restaurant — and pressed his arm, the one with the knife up his sleeve, closer to his side. Luckily, the man seemed to recognize who he was and rapped his fist against the door to the room, as a warning it seemed, since in the next moment he pushed open the door and gestured Tony in with the grimmest of faces.

Once inside, Tony didn't hesitate to run straight to Loki's chair, calling his name as he dropped to his knees before him. And he wasted no time slipping the knife, as discreetly as possible, under Loki's palm, then raised a hand to cup his husband's face.

"Are you okay?" Loki stared at him blankly, and aside from the brief squeeze to his fingers and the jerk of his face from Tony's reach, he made no movement. But by the intensity of his husband's gaze, Tony sensed something was up. "Lok —"

"Check on your son," he snapped. Tony rose, still trying to decipher the look Loki was giving him. Confused, he turned to rush to Bash but was halted by Moira moving in front of him.

"Is it true?"

"That you're a deranged bitch? Totally." Tony's quip was sharp and immediate, like he didn't have to think about it — and he didn't. He heard Loki's short impatient sigh behind him, but his eyes stayed on the woman before him. She looked…amused. And almost gleeful.  _ What? _

"Cute," she murmured through a smirk.

Tony rolled his eyes and took a step toward Bash, only to be cut off again, this time by a hand to his chest. He instantly swatted it away. "Let me get to my kid!"

"I will. Tell me first; is it true?"

At his wits end, he barked a short,  _ "What?" _ That was when Loki spoke, softly, a whisper of just his full name. He turned himself, standing so he had Loki to one side, Moira and Bash behind her, to the other.

"I've told her."

"Told her what?" Loki dipped his head slightly to the side. He looked so sad and tired, Tony wasn't sure if this was a put-on or not.

"The truth," he answered solemnly.

"The truth? Babe, what —" He looked between his husband and his captor, and suddenly went still, quiet, brain scrambling to catch up.  _ Think, Stark. _ His eyes narrowed slightly, and Loki seemed to be trying to express something to him again. Loki lifted a brow briefly, then lowered his eyes and turned his head away. Something clicked in Tony's mind and he looked at Moira again. She looked like a lunatic, smiling so wide it was creepy, and breathing heavily. The one thing she wanted was to break him and Loki up. It was the one thing that would have made her happiest. Besides his money.

Letting out a long breath, letting his shoulders droop, Tony tried to sell it, and let his gaze fall to Bash, sitting stiffly in that chair, eyes already welling with tears, but a question there, too. He shrugged at his son.

"Sorry you had to find out like this, kiddo." Tony's stomach dropped when Bash's face crumbled and he began to cry silently. His own eyes started to sting and he had to blink it away. "Let him go," he said gruffly before clearing his throat. "He doesn't need to be here for this. Let me hand him over to S.H.I.E.L.D."

"No," Moira answered promptly. "I think there's more you're keeping from him. And I think you need to tell him about it."

Loki bristled in his chair, making it creak under his weight. Tony didn't like where Moira was heading, but he needed to give Loki enough time to cut through the bind on his wrist. "He knows enough, Moira. He's a damn kid, for Christ's sake. He's scared out of his mind. Let him go."

She scoffed. "Enough? He didn't even know about  _ me _ ."

"We don't tell our kids horror stories." He hoped Loki liked that one.

Moira slapped a hand to her waist, jutting it out in that way women did to let you know she was pissed. "Does your precious little boy know that you cheated on his father with me? Does he know that you lied to the whole family and spent a night screwing me?"

Sebastian gasped, his big green eyes bulging wide, and Tony threw up a hand to silence him. "We don't tell our kids lies either."

"It's not a lie," she argued vehemently. "Why are you trying to deny this? You don't remember that night anyway."

"Making yourself sound forgettable. Smart." He cried out in pain when she slammed her fist into his chest, narrowly missing the arc reactor.

"Shut up, Tony! Maybe you can't remember, but  _ I _ can. And I can still sell my story. There's a lot of people out there who would die to hear what it was like to have sex with Tony Stark."

"And how the hell would  _ you _ know?" Tony shouted in her face. He hoped Loki was through that zip tie by now. Moira huffed indignantly, a nervous laugh trilling after it.

"How wouldn't I know? I slept with you."

"Oh, really?"

"Yes!"

"You wanna swear to that?"

"I'd swear on a bible!"

Reaching behind him, into his back pocket, Tony pulled out his cell phone. A few buttons pressed and he shoved the phone screen at Moira. "You're a goddamn liar, Moira."

Moira rolled her eyes and glared at the phone. Until she realized what she was watching. Her face went ashen. Her eyes shot up to Tony, who was smirking triumphantly. "Where did you get this? How did…" Tony watched realization creep into those cat-like eyes and felt his heart start to pump a little faster.

"Babe?" he called, without moving a muscle.

"Got it," Loki muttered the words just as Moira seemed to catch on. And slapped Tony across the face.

"It's a trick isn't it? Son of a  _ bitch! _ "

Everything seemed to happen at once.

Moira shoved hard at Tony, catching him off-balance, and had him falling back onto the coffee table, shouting Loki's name. Sebastian lunged for him, shouting for him at the same time. Loki, with his now free arm, reached behind him and blindly stabbed at Moira's guard, getting him somewhere in the belly, then quickly cut his other hand and legs free, and ran to lock the door before her other guards could rush in.

"Stop!" Tony had shoved Sebastian behind him, and pulled the gun from the hidden compartment in the suitcase Loki had brought in, aiming it at Moira as she dropped to her knees to crawl for her guard's gun. Ignoring him, she reached for it anyway. But just as her fingers were about to wrap around the handle, a fancy black shoe kicked it away and a knife was at her throat.

"Get up," Loki ordered, keeping the blade at Moira's throat.

"Dad?"

The soft call of his name, and the sniffles that followed, had Tony turning to find Sebastian behind him. "Oh, kiddo." Tony gathered him in his arms, giving him a tight hug, and a smattering of kisses to his temple, cheek, and ear. "Are you all right?"

"Yeah," Sebastian muttered through tears. Tony pulled back and started to work on getting the ties off of his wrists.

"You're lucky you didn't hit your head, Bash, trying to lunge at me like that. There." He was able to free Bash's wrists, rubbing at the red lines it left on his pale wrists, then cupped his face and wiped at his wet cheeks. But Bash wasn't looking at him. Tony followed his gaze to where Loki had Moira pinned in the middle of the room. "Shit. Loki."

Moira's eyes darted to him then back to the man holding the knife against her jugular. "What are you gonna do, Loki? Kill me in front of your kid?"

Tony could see Loki trembling. Probably resisting the urge to jab the knife into her throat. Which is exactly what he would want to do had he had the woman in the same position.

"You…will leave us alone from now on." Loki's voice shook with his barely controlled rage, easing the knife back only a few centimeters. Moira laughed. And leaned back into the blade, daring Loki to slice her throat.

"Do it, Loki. Show Sebastian what a big man you are now. Show him that you can easily kill an unarmed woman. Show your son that you're not that weak little slut who couldn't fight off a man..."

"You bitch," Tony spat, shooting to his feet, but not stepping any closer. From his spot, he could see Loki's eyes fill, his lips tremble as he told the woman to shut up.

Moira mockingly pouted her lips at him. "Let me guess. You didn't tell him that either?" A sardonic smirk twisted her lips as her eyes traveled to and settled on Sebastian, now standing beside Tony, slightly behind him, shielded by him."You want to know everything about your father, don't you, kid?"

"Don't listen to her." Tony spoke the words, not knowing if he was saying it to Loki or Sebastian. "It's bullshit."

"Anthony, get him out of here!"

Tony jumped at Loki's shout, unused to him speaking like that. "Loki. Baby, Coulson's here. He's just outside. Don't do anything you'll regret later. Let her rot in jail, for f —"

"Anthony! Please!"

"For Christ's sake, Tony. Shut the hell up. You know your little princess here isn't gonna —" Moira made a choking sound as Loki twisted his wrist, holding just the tip of the knife toward her, his other hand flying up to grip tightly around her throat.

Tony jerked forward, throwing one hand up toward Loki, the other went behind him protectively over Sebastian's arm. "Loki!"

"Do  _ not _ underestimate my rage, woman." Tony watched, in horror, shock, and with a slight hint of pride, as Loki squeezed his fingers around Moira's throat, evident by her grabbing at his wrist. He was sure Loki didn't even realize he was lifting the woman off the ground. "You  _ will _ cease these pathetic attempts to ruin my husband's life and livelihood. You will leave my family alone. Do. You. Understand?"

Tony felt movement beside him and wrapped his fingers around Bash's elbow, tugging him back as he stepped around him. "Bash."

Sebastian simply pulled his arm from Tony's grasp and walked over to Loki and Moira. Moving slowly, he raised his shaky hand and laid it on Loki's shoulder.  _ "Pappa?" _ Tony inched forward and caught the startled look on Loki's face as he turned to look at his son.

_ "Elskling…?" _

Sebastian spared Moira a glance and pressed a hand to Loki's elbow, urging him to lower it from around the woman's neck. "Let's go home,  _ Pappa _ ," he said softly through a thick voice. "Let's just go home. Jazz and Audi are waiting for us. Let's just go.  _ Vær så snill, Pappa? _ "

Tony watched the exchange, remaining perfectly still. Relief allowed him to breathe again when, slowly, Loki seemed to come out of the rage-filled haze he was in, his face relaxing, eyes dimming to a more neutral light. He nodded at Sebastian and started to ease his grip. And just as he loosened his fingers from around Moira's throat, she twisted the wrist holding the knife, forcing the blade into Loki's thigh.

Tony watched, frozen with fear, as Loki fell to his knees. Snapping out of his trance, he moved to grab for Bash, but Moira got her hands on him first. "No! Bash!"

"No!" Loki yelled, throwing out an arm for his son, but crumbled against the pain in his leg. "Ah! Moira. Don't." Tony took one step forward, but stilled when Moira held the blade to Bash's throat. His stomach plummeted, his heart stopped, and he couldn't get his voice to work.

"Dad!  _ Pappa! _ "

"Shut up, kid! Don't move. Either of you," she warned, dragging Sebastian with her as she backed away from them.

"Moira. Please…" Tony's voice was barely a whisper, his eyes darting between her and Bash's wide eyes, almost making him go dizzy. Noises and shouts outside indicated Moira's men were down. Heavy thumps against the door had to be someone throwing his or her weight into pushing it open. Moira looked at Tony.

"You want him; I want my money. And I want it  _ now _ . Give it to me or so help me, you will both sit there and watch him die. And I will smash every single one of your reactors."

Loki was making small grunts of pain, and Tony could smell his blood, seeping from his wound, from where he stood. When Loki spoke to Moira, his voice was strained with it. "Don't do this. Please. Let him go. H-he's only a child. Take me instead. I won't fight you."

She lowered her bewildered eyes down to Loki. And Tony recognized panic in them, in the way her hands shook against a mildly struggling Bash, in the way her breath came fast and heavy. "My money, Loki. That's what I want. And a way out of —"

All four of them jolted, and Moira screamed, at the sound of the door being pushed open, the force of which had it flying off its hinges. Tony dropped down over Loki, covering his head to avoid the wooden shards flying through the air. "Loki —  _ no _ —!" Tony tried to grab for him as Loki, taking advantage of Moira's distraction, and clearly on a surge of adrenaline, leapt up, arms outstretched for Sebastian. Sebastian's eyes widened even further, his lips parting in a scream. Before Tony could move, unsure whether to reach for Bash or Loki, or both, a shot rang out, silencing everything.

* * *

It was the most frightening moment of his life.

Even more than that day in his old Greenwich apartment when he couldn't get to his young son, stuck behind a locked bedroom door. This time a maniac of a woman stood only feet away from him, holding his son hostage. With a knife at his throat. He could see the blood starting to ooze out from where the sharp tip had superficially, if he could guess, pierced his skin. Loki's whole being jerked at the slamming of the door to the floor, and without a moment's hesitation, he pushed himself up and grabbed for his son. He had heard the shot, ringing in his ears, and immediately after, the scared shriek ripped from his son's mouth.

Then…the undeniable sound of a body hitting the ground.

Sebastian had fallen straight into his arms, knocking them both back to the floor. And as any parent would do, Loki frantically checked over him — throat, chest, arms, legs, face, fingers, toes — his name and common endearments spilled out from his lips over and over. Sebastian looked dazed, pupils blown wide, breath coming much too fast. And when Loki pull his hand from his throat and Sebastian spotted the swatch of blood, he went into a full-on panic attack.

" _ Pappa! Pappa! _ I'm bleeding!" Sebastian's arms and body flailed, his legs kicked out, and it took all of Loki's remaining, and dwindling, strength to calm him down again. He held Sebastian close to his chest, cradling him as much as he could, wincing in pain — physical and emotional.

"No, Sebastian. Shh, shh, shh…it's only a scratch,  _ elskling _ . You're all right."

Sebastian's shrieks of panic quieted into muted sobs against Loki's shirt. " _ Pappa. Ikke gå fra meg. Vær så snill, ikke la meg. _ "

It tore a deep hole in Loki's heart the way Sebastian gripped onto him so tightly, curling himself around his father's form. "I'm here.  _ Jeg er akkurat her, min kjærlighet _ . I will always be here." Sebastian continued to sob, heavy, body-wracking cries, clutching at Loki, even as S.H.I.E.L.D. agents moved around them. "It's all right. You're all right." Loki repeated the words, tightening his arms around Sebastian, kissing at his sweaty forehead and dampened hair.

Finally, Tony was there, wrapping his arms around them both from behind Sebastian. "Bash? Hey, kiddo, it's okay." He laid a hand over Loki's on Sebastian's cheek, fighting tears. "We're okay, hon."

Loki turned up his face to Tony, still rocking Sebastian. "Moira?" Tony glanced over his shoulder to where Moira's lifeless body laid in an awkward twisted shape, his eyes drawn directly to the bullet wound in the center of her forehead. He had to give Coulson credit for being a great shot. He looked back at Loki, shaking his head. "And the guard?"

Tony's gaze shot to the scene behind them. "Not dead. And getting a talking-to by an angry-looking Coulson." He looked at Loki again, and because he needed to, planted a hard kiss to Loki's mouth. 

They broke apart and both looked up when Coulson crouched beside them, a small grin on his lips. "Sorry for the delay, kids."

Tony frowned, and remembering Loki's wound, pressed his hand to his thigh, making him groan, to stop anymore flow of blood. "What the hell happened to you?"

"Believe it or not, they had more than handguns on them. It's a mess out there." Tony scoffed softly, absently giving Sebastian's leg a squeeze as he had finally started to calm down. Coulson looked to Loki, motioned to his shirt. "That's a lot of blood on you. His or yours?"

Loki dropped his gaze down then flicked his eyes briefly up to Coulson, then back at Sebastian quieting down to soft whimpers now. He feared the childhood nightmares that had plagued him after that day with Thane would return. "His," he answered, stroking his jet black hair. "She nicked his throat."

"But Loki's got a wound here. It's not deep and it's starting to clot now, but he should be looked at."

"No," he said firmly. "I'm not leaving him."

"Babe…"

"They can come in and work on me here. I'm not letting him out of my sight." Giving in to his fear, Loki's voice broke as he silently started to cry, and pressed his tightly closed lips to the crown of Sebastian's head.

Coulson glanced between Loki and Tony, as Tony settled on his bottom next to Loki, holding both Loki and Sebastian in his arms, wondering if they realized that this was exactly how he had found them eight years ago. "Will you let us look at him? To get him checked out and get that cut looked at." He clarified when Loki's fingers tightened around Sebastian.

"Babe, let them. We'll stay right here with him. I won't leave you."

Loki looked at Coulson, still holding Sebastian tightly. "Don't disturb him? He needs his rest."

Coulson waved someone over and nodded in agreement. "We'll take good care of him, Mr. Stark."

Two S.H.I.E.L.D. agents came over then, moving in as Coulson rose and stepped away. They cut through Loki's pants and dressed his wound, and carefully checked over Sebastian. Once they had both been cleared to go home, Tony had to talk Loki into letting them take Sebastian to the car. After he had finally agreed, the agents lifted Sebastian from his arms and carried him out, with Coulson following.

Giving in to his exhaustion, Loki turned to Tony, leaning into him. Tony's arms went around him immediately. "Promise me…?" he asked brokenly.

"Anything, baby. The world."

"No." Loki leaned back, cupping Tony's face, glad they had cleaned the guard's blood from his fingers before he touched his husband like this. "Just promise me this one thing. Promise me that, from here on, we'll be alright." He settled again, with his head against Tony's chest. "Just promise me that."

Tony tightened his arms around Loki again, fiercely, fighting his own tears again, because he could feel the dampness from Loki's soaking into his shirt. "I promise, baby. I promise."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translations:  
> Ikke gå fra meg = Don't leave me.  
> Vær så snill, ikke la meg = Please, don't leave me.  
> Jeg er akkurat her, min kjærlighet = I'm right here, my love.


	18. A Little Too Late, Much Too Soon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the aftermath of the hotel incident, Tony and Loki wrestle with Sebastian’s shock, Sif’s ire, and an emergency with the Barton family.

"Mr. Stark…s." Tony felt a nudge to his shoulder but didn't move, didn't budge one bit from holding Loki. He felt the warmth of a hand on his shoulder now, could smell the latex of the glove it was encased in. "Mr. Stark?"

Tony opened his eyes to find a stocky, brown-haired man in a charcoal gray suit kneeling beside him. "Yeah?" The word came out softly, bewildered, as Tony was still a little dazed, exhausted, crashing from drain of adrenaline.

The man held a cell phone out to him. "Is this yours, sir?" he asked with a hesitant smile.

He dropped one arm from around Loki, nodded, and took the phone. "Yeah. Thanks, um…"

"Koenig. Agent Koenig."

"Agent Koenig."

"No problem, sir. Uh, look, I don't mean to rush either of you. I know it's been a trying day for you both. But we really have to get in this area here and get everything cleaned up before the hotel staff notices anything is amiss."

Tony looked around and realized there were other agents, dressed just like Koenig, buzzing around them, putting the room to its rightful order. "Oh, shit. Yeah, okay. We'll be out of your way soon. Loki…" Agent Koenig gave him another pat and rose to continue with his work. Tony shook Loki lightly. "Baby, come on. Let's go. We gotta get out of here. And Bash is waiting for us outside."

Loki groaned and pushed away from Tony, reaching out for something to help him up. "Those damn agents couldn't give me something for the pain? My thigh is  _ aching _ ."

Tony chuckled as he got to his feet and held out both hands to Loki, after stuffing his phone into his pocket. "I'll keep my dirty thoughts to myself," he muttered, laughing more at the dirty look Loki shot him. "Sorry. Let's go home and get you some pain killers, babe."

They both groaned with effort as Tony pulled Loki to his feet and quickly slipped an arm around his waist. "Don't you mock me, Anthony Edward Stark. I just took a knife to the leg for you and your son."

"And we love you for it, baby," Tony said through pursed lips before pressing them to Loki's cheek. He helped Loki hobble his way out of the suite, down the hallway, S.H.I.E.L.D. agents dodging out of their way, and out to the parking lot where Tony's car was parked. The agents who had carried Bash to the car were standing guard beside it. They gave Tony and Loki a nod as they approached and went about their regular business. "We're gonna have to have someone drive your car back to the house."

"Later. I want to get Sebastian home."

"All right. Maybe I'll just call up Phil later and tell him to drive it back, huh? What the — shit." They had just approached Tony's car when AC/DC began to blast from his pocket. He paused, balancing Loki as he reached into his pocket for his phone.

"Who would be calling you now?" Loki griped.

Tony's lips lifted on one side as he read the screen and swiped his finger across the green 'answer' bar, bringing the phone to his ear. "Hey, Barton. We're good here —"

Loki sighed, irritated, and tried to start forward, but Tony tugged him back. "Ow. Anthony," he hissed, scowling at him, swatting at his hand.

"Where are you?" Loki tensed at the urgency in Tony's voice. "…and Jazz and Audi? Are they with you?" Loki's hand went to Tony's, squeezing as his eyes rose to meet his. Tony returned the squeeze before releasing Loki altogether and searching for his keys. "Okay. We're on our way."

"Where? What happened?"

"We gotta go," Tony said, reaching for the door to the passenger side.

"Anthony, where?"

"Uh, the hospital. Clint's taking Natasha to the hospital. And he's got the whole brood of kids with him. They're waiting for us. Come on!"

Loki stared at him with wide eyes as he moved around him. "Why? Is it the baby? It's too early. It's too early for her to have the baby. She's not ready —" Tony stepped forward, cupping Loki's face in both of his hands to silence him.

"Which is why they're going to the hospital, Loki," he said slowly, as calmly as he could. All he needed was Bash  _ and  _ Loki freaking out on him. "She was having some pains and Clint got concerned. So…come on. I told Clint we'd meet them there."

He started to move Loki toward the open door, hesitating when Loki hissed in pain. "Jameson and Audrey? They are with them, then?"

"Yeah, they're fine. It's okay, babe. I'm sure she's fine. It's probably just a false alarm with all the excitement going on today." Tony spoke his reassurances as he settled Loki in his seat and buckled him in, then did a quick check on Bash. But his heart was racing, his mind working, calculating what he knew of Natasha's progress, the baby's progress, and its chances of surviving if born this early.

* * *

Halfway to the hospital, Sebastian started to stir and woke still slightly panicked, and unsure of his surroundings. Loki was able to talk him down, as Tony sped and wove through traffic. He got one scolding look from Loki and slowed. Minutely. Arriving at the hospital, Tony helped Loki out first and had to spare a few minutes to urge Sebastian from the car. Once he finally had emerged, he immediately went to Loki's side, and the two of them helped Loki hobble inside.

"Where's the maternity ward?"

"Third floor," Loki answered, tightening his arm around Sebastian, who was clinging to him.

"Of course it is," Tony mumbled, guiding the trio toward the elevator. "You want me to get you a wheelchair?"

Loki grunted, once Tony had settled him against the wall, and shook his head. "I can manage. We'll likely be sitting for a bit when we get up there."

"Okay." Tony turned to Sebastian, dipping his head slightly to be eye level with him, trembling as he was. "Hey, kiddo. How you doing?"  _ Eyes too wide, sweating too profusely, bottom lip still trembling _ , he mentally listed.

"'M okay," he muttered. But he flinched when Tony reached up to cup his face. Tony pressed a kiss to the top of his head and looked at Loki as he moved to put Sebastian between them. They shared a worried look.

"You will be, hon. You will be."

As the elevator doors opened, Tony immediately spotted the group of kids in the waiting room, Ana dead center with Xander in her lap; Rowan and Jazz playing with whatever toys the hospital provided. Ana must have alerted the others because suddenly little feet were pounding on the tile; Audrey, a dark-haired blur, as she headed straight for them.

"Daddy!"

"Shit," Tony muttered under his breath, halting Loki and Sebastian and moving in front of them. "Hey, Monkey." He caught her just as she launched herself at him, groaning as she slammed into him, and lowered to a knee.

"Daddy, where have you been?" she demanded loudly.

"Shh, shh. Monkey, we gotta use our inside voices, okay? And no running, not in here. Now, let's go sit down." He rose, taking Audrey's hand, just as Jazz approached, eyeing Loki's exposed and bandaged leg with wide eyes.

"What's wrong with  _ Pappa? _ " he asked in a soft voice.

"Nothing, darling. Just a little accident." Loki held out a hand to him, urging him closer. Jazz hesitantly slipped his hand into Loki’s larger one and moved to stand beside him. "How are you?"

"Hungry. Your pant leg is missing."

Loki forced a small laugh. "I know. I'm terribly sad to lose it. I liked these pants very much." Jazz giggled softly and tightened his grip on Loki's hand, moving slowly with him, eyeing his brother on their father's other side.

"Where were you, Daddy?" Audrey asked, tugging on his arm to turn his attention back to her. "How come we had to come here for Auntie Tasha?"

Tony sighed heavily, holding on to the tattered shreds of his patience, leading the whole group back to the waiting room. "Told you, baby, had to do a thing with  _ Pappa _ . I'm not sure about Auntie Tasha yet. Hey, Little Red," he greeted Ana with a head bob. She smiled softly, her eyes going first to Tony. "Where's your dad?"

"In the room with Mama. What happened to Uncle Loki? Bash?" She frowned at him, her arms tightening around Xander, watching him closely as Loki guided him to sit beside her, then sat himself. "Are you okay?" He looked at her, not really seeing her, and nodded, stiffly, keeping a tight hold on Loki's hand.

"Sebastian.  _ Lette opp, min kjære _ ," he murmured, asking him to ease his hold.

" _ Beklager, Pappa _ ." Over his head, Loki caught Ana's stunned look. She knew Sebastian rarely spoke his native Norwegian, nor called Loki  _ Pappa _ . Unsure how to respond to her, he looked to Tony for an escape.

"Should I go look for the room?" Because she was clawing at his shirt and repeating his name, Tony lifted Audrey into his arms, settling her on his hip. "Zip it, princess. I'm talking to your father."

"That's mean, Daddy."

"Pssh." He pressed a kiss to her cheek to quiet her.

"Or ask a nurse what's going on," Loki suggested. Sebastian leaned into him, pushing his head to rest on Loki's chest. Loki slipped his arm around him and pressed a kiss to the crown of his head. He felt more like that four year old boy from so long ago at the moment. "I'm here, love."

Tony looked around for the nurse's station, spotting Clint just as he stepped out of a room. "Clint!"

"You made it." He jogged over, already dressed in scrubs, and looked around the room at his kids, angling his head when he spotted Loki. Realization sprung quickly, and he inhaled sharply. Loki gave a firm shake of his head, and Clint turned to Tony.

"Long story. Later. How's Natasha?"

"Ahh, that's why I came out here." He turned back to look over his shoulder, just as Natasha was being wheeled out of the room. "They couldn't stop the contractions, and her water just broke, so they're taking her to delivery."

"It's too soon. Much too soon."

Tony and Clint looked to Loki, and Clint shrugged. "I know. But they don't really have a choice. Aside from a raised heartbeat, the baby seems to be okay. They think she might be all right, even this early. Listen, I gotta get back or they won't let me in with her."

"Go." Tony flung his arm out, urging Clint to follow Natasha. "We got the kids."

"Tell her we're here," Loki called after him and Clint shouted back that he would. Tony set Audrey down and asked her to go join Rowan. She pouted, but obeyed, and he moved to kneel before Loki and Sebastian. "It's too soon, Anthony," he said as Tony took his hand.

"I know, babe. But she's strong. She'll get through this. And that baby, too." Loki nodded, grunted softly, wincing. "You want me to see if I can get you something for the pain? I'm sure they've got some Advil or something around, real handy."

"Please." Tony tried a smile, but knew it was weak so opted for bestowing a quick kiss to Loki's lips instead. It took a little finessing, and some mild flirting, but Tony was able to procure Loki a couple tablets of ibuprofen and some water. And, finally, he took a seat beside Loki, letting him rest his head on his shoulder as Loki ran his long fingers through Sebastian's hair.

They sat like that for a while, waiting to hear from Clint, idly watching the children, but mostly leaving the job in the capable hands of Ana. Loki felt himself nodding off on Tony and barely registered the hard slap of boots on the hospital floor. Until Audrey shouted out Sif's name.

"Oh, shit," Tony muttered under his breath at the same moment Loki opened his eyes and saw her barreling toward them. There was definitely something terrifying about an angry pregnant woman. "Did you call her?"

"I've been a little busy all day, Anthony." Loki sat up, nudging Sebastian to sit upright, too.

" _ Mamma _ ," he murmured.

"Sit tight, Sebastian," Loki said just as softly, his hand giving Sebastian's a squeeze.

"What the  _ hell _ is going on?" She demanded, slapping a fist to her hip. Loki felt rather than saw Sebastian flinch beside him.

"Uh…hey, Sif," Tony greeted with a toothy grin.

"Don't 'hey, Sif' me. What the hell is this?" She jammed a hand toward Loki's bare, bandaged leg. "What the hell happened with your husband? And why didn't I know what was happening with  _ my  _ son?"

Tony got to his feet, hands out toward Sif, silently begging her to calm down. "Sif. I can explain. Just…cool it in front of the kids, huh?" He mumbled, jerking his head toward the group of kids under ten, bar Ana, raptly watching them.

"No! I give you two an awful lot of leeway, Tony. You know that I do."

"I know that, but, Sif —"

"But when you don't tell me when my son's life is in —"

"I  _ know _ , Sif, but —!"

"What if something had happened to him? Would I have even known if Clint hadn't called me? It could have been Sebastian in the hospital for all I —"

_ "Siflena!" _

Every eye in the waiting room turned to Loki, pale-faced and trembling slightly, whose voice alone made the windows shake. His own children cowered slightly in fear, knowing well just how angry he had to be to shout like that. He rarely raised his voice like that at home. Breathing slowly through his nose, Loki lifted his eyes to Sif, and calmly began to explain to her, in Norwegian, that he was teetering on the edge of sanity.

"If we can find someplace quiet and away from the children, Anthony and I will gladly explain everything," he continued in his second language. "All right?"

Tony looked between the two, willing Sif to accept whatever Loki had offered. He had heard his name spoken and assumed Loki had offered up some sort of explanation. Sif looked none too pleased at the use of her full name, but seemed to relax a little, nonetheless.

"Seems a little late for that, don't you think?" Loki said nothing in reply, and the heat of his gaze didn't appear to have any effect on Sif whatsoever. After a few tense moments, Sif rolled her eyes and threw up her hands. "Fine." She looked to Tony. "Can you find a spot for us to talk?"

"Yeah." He glanced at Loki, who gave him a nod, and went to the nurse's station once more. Thankfully, the maternity ward housed another, separate waiting room that was smaller and more private, holding copies of Christian bibles, Jewish bibles, and other prayer books in several different languages. Tony returned to help Loki up, asking Ana to watch Sebastian, who looked ready to pass out again, and led him and Sif into the room.

"Start explaining," she demanded the moment the door closed behind the two men.

"Can I at least get my arse in a chair before you start making demands?" Loki growled out, hissing as Tony lowered him to a cushiony armed chair.

"No," she spat back stubbornly, laying one hand on her swollen belly, the other at her lower back.

"Sif, for Christ's sake, you can see he has an injury." Tony tried to retain his frustration, because Sif wasn't the cause of it, and she didn't deserve him unleashing it on her. "Give us a break here, all right?"

"Why should I? You deliberately kept things from me! About my child!"

"We did not!" Loki shouted, apparently not sharing Tony's sentiments. "Now, sit down, be quiet, and let us explain."

"Don't you talk to me like that, Loki Odinson Stark," Sif barked back, her hazel eyes flaring as they bore into Loki. "I am the mother of your children. I deserve far more respect than that from you."

"All right." He pressed a hand to face, sighing heavily. "Sif, please. Sit down."

Slightly appeased, Sif crossed her arms over the top of her belly and lowered slowly onto the lone sofa in the room, tucked into the corner, and waited. Taking turns, Loki and Tony explained the entire situation, from the beginning, when Moira entered their lives, up to that day. She listened, registering expressions of shock, and sometimes dismay, but remained silent until they finished.

"Why didn't you tell me any of this while it was happening?" she asked after a few moments of silence. "I could've helped. Somehow."

"No," Loki murmured. "It was between Anthony and I. Our marriage. Our relationship."

"No," she said more firmly, drawing a surprised look from Loki. "It was not between you and  _ Anthony _ , because Sebastian was also involved. Who's to say she wouldn't have gone after Jazz and Audi as well?"

"Sebastian involved himself, Sif," he countered, black brows coming together. "Had he paid any attention to either of us, he wouldn't have gotten in that car and followed me there. And he wouldn't have gotten caught in the crosshairs of something that had nothing to do with him."

"Maybe you should have paid more attention to your son than some batty woman trying to extort money from your husband!"

"Don't talk at me as if you know how to run a house full of children and manage a marriage? You've no idea what I've been through these last few months!"

"What is that supposed to mean? Is that a dig? You think I don't know how hard it is? You think I don't see what you and Tony, or Clint and Natasha, or any of my married friends go through? You think I don't want that?! I could have that if I did want it, you arrogant son of a —"

_ "Stop it!" _ Tony's voice echoed in the tiny, windowless room. The only sound was the hollow sound of his heavy pants behind his hands, clamped over his face, as he fought to catch his breath. "Stop it. Both of you." He lowered his hands and looked first at Loki then Sif. "It's  _ my _ fault, okay?"

"No, Anthony, it —"

"Loki," he cut him off, nearly whining his husband's name, turning to face him, his eyes brimming with tears. "I'm the one who lied. I'm the one who screwed up. I…" his words died off as his voice broke. "I almost lost you both today. Again." His voice was a raspy whisper, the words tasting like acid on his tongue. When he spoke again, he had to fight through gasping breaths. "This all happened…because of  _ me _ ."

Loki shook his head at his husband, his eyes beginning to fill. "Anthony…" His face crumpling, Tony gave in to the tears, and he dropped to his knees beside Loki, grappling for his hands. Apologies spilled from his lips, between gasps of air. "Oh, darling…"

As Sif watched the scene unfold before her, the anger she felt started to slip away. Realizing they needed some time alone, she painstakingly slow, got to her feet. "I'm going to take Bash home. To  _ your _ home," she amended when Loki's head shot up. "He needs to not be here in this place right now. Do you want me to take the others?"

"Jameson and Audrey —  _ if _ they want to go. Let the others stay." She nodded and moved to the door. "Sif. I'm sorry. And thank you."

She smiled, eyeing Tony sadly. " _ Ta vare på ham. Han trenger det. _ "

Loki grinned softly down at Tony, sniffling quietly in his lap. "I will. I always do." The door closed quietly behind Sif; the room remained silent but for Tony's sniffles and muted sobs. "Anthony. Love. Stop crying."

Tony turned his head enough to look up at Loki, and Loki took the opportunity to wipe at his wet cheeks. "But I could have lost you, Loki. And Bash. I don't know what I would've done…"

Loki slipped a hand under Tony's cheek and lifted his head from his lap. "But you didn't lose me. Or Sebastian. Hmm? We are still here with you. Because of you, we are still here." His voice broke at the tail end of his sentence and he didn't fight it when Tony surged up and pressed his mouth firmly to his, briefly, before pulling him into a fierce hug.

They sat like that for several long moments, letting themselves dwell in the emotional struggle of the day and the relief that they had survived it, mostly intact.

"What did Sif say?" Tony asked through sniffles, falling back to his knees. He let Loki fuss over him, swiping at his wet eyes and dragging the sleeve of his shirt over his cheeks.

"She told me to take care of you. That you need it."

Tony chuckled. "Smart lady."

"Very." Tony's cheeks dry now, Loki cupped his face and pulled him close, resting his forehead against his. "Can we put all of this behind us now? Please." Tony wrapped his fingers around Loki's wrists, nodded. "Our focus should be on Sebastian."

"Yeah. Absolutely."

"And the new baby on the way."

Tony smiled, breathing a soft sigh. "Have I ever told you how much I love seeing you with one of our babies in your arms?" Loki grinned, blushing softly. "We should start looking for a house."

Loki leaned back, lips curved, their hands, joined, falling to his lap. "You were serious about that?"

"Well…yeah. Babe, I don't want Sebastian on a floor by himself. And, frankly, I don't see either Jazz or Audi being okay sharing a room with a crying infant." Loki chuckled softly. "And I don't want you to have to give up your office. You need it. It's your space." He reached up to brush his fingers across Loki's cheek. "I have my lab; you have your office."

Grinning, Loki nuzzled at Tony's fingers, kissed them as far as his lips could reach. "I do love you. So much."

"Yeah, I know." They both chuckled and Tony lowered his hand to their joined ones in Loki's lap. "We should get back out there."

Loki sighed as Tony got to his feet. "Yes. We should. Poor Anastasia has been stuck with them all day."

"Ah, she's tough. She knows how to keep them in line. How's your leg?" He took Loki's arm, slipping an arm around his waist as quickly as he could, and helped him to his feet.

"The pain has subsided a bit, for now. I wonder how long it will last."

"Couple weeks, maybe? We should really have someone check that dressing. And maybe I should see if I can get you some scrubs or something 'til we get home. Jazz looked pretty freaked out seeing the bandage."

Loki looked down at the bandage on his leg, his blood already seeping through it. "Hm. Yes, that sounds good. I can only handle one traumatized child today." He tried to grin, but it saddened him to think of Sebastian's current condition.

Tony noticed this and gave him a squeeze. "Should we be worried that Audi, a, didn't seem to be bothered that you were bleeding, and b, that she didn't seem to care about anybody but herself?"

Loki chuckled. "She's only a child, Anthony. They don't tend to see beyond their own wants for some time. We just have to keep on her. Jameson is simply a little more astute than she."

"That's because he's practically attached at the hip to you."

"Well, he does have  _ your _ genes," Loki smirked.

"Ha, ha. Funny man." Loki almost giggled as they exited the room, and with Tony's help, he was walking a little better. Tony drew them to a halt at the nurses station, and asked about a spare pair of pants. Taking him into the nearest restroom, Tony helped Loki into a pair of scrubs, the both of them giggling through it because Loki couldn't keep his balance and Tony couldn't resist tickling his soft flesh. Finally, after tossing Loki's pants in the trash, they joined the kids in the waiting room once more. 

With Sebastian gone now, Loki moved to sit beside Ana, smiling as Jameson immediately jumped up to sit beside him. Tony gave him a look that read  _ See? _ , and was headed to join them, but was cut off by Audi and dragged to the floor to play with her and Rowan.

"Is your leg okay now, Uncle Loki?"

Loki nodded, smiling softly. "Yes, it's fine, Anastasia. Thank you for asking." He reached out to poke Xander in the belly, enjoying the spit bubble-filled smile and giggle, but beside him, he could feel Jameson's eyes heavily watching him. Turning slightly, a soft grin on his lips, Loki cupped Jameson's chin. "Why are you not playing with your cousin and sister?" He shrugged, and slowly, Loki shifted more to face him better. "Jameson. Tell me the truth."

His eyes fell, his fingers wringing together in a nervous habit reminiscent of his father, and Loki dropped his hand over them to still them. "Are you okay?" he asked quietly, as if it were a secret.

His heart aching from the utter sweetness of Jameson's face, Loki couldn't stop himself from turning up his face to place a kiss to his cheek, ignoring the way Jameson made the obligatory 'ick' face. "I am fine. Really."

"But you have a bandage," he poked lightly at Loki's leg with his finger. "How did you get hurt,  _ Pappa? _ "

"I told you. A little accident." He raised those big brown eyes to Loki.

"Like the kind Dad has?"

"What the heck is that supposed to mean, you little punk?" Tony shouted from his spot on the floor.

Loki laughed, slipping his arm around Jameson when he leaned into him, hiding his face from Tony's, his giggles muffled in his shirt. "Oh, hush. You act as if he's not speaking the truth." Tony feigned an insulted gasp and Loki laughed again, giving him a conspiratorial wink, before he looked back to Jameson. "I will be just fine, darling. You don't need to worry."

His little brow creased, eyes dropping to study Loki's injured leg. "…Okay."

Knowing he wasn't satisfied with that, Loki took his arm and pulled him to his feet to stand him up between his legs. "You are my sensitive one, aren't you?

He scrunched his nose, making a soft whine. " _ Pappa. _ "

Loki grinned and held Jameson by the waist. "I…do have a small wound in my leg, Jameson. And I will likely be in some pain for a bit. But I promise, it shall heal. Do you trust me on that?"

Jameson seemed to study his face for a moment, and Loki worried for a moment he would continue to push the issue. Instead, in the next moment, he nodded and threw his arms around Loki's neck, who gave a quiet  _ oof _ .

With a soft sigh, Loki slid his arms around Jameson, hugging him tight, humming, "My boy." His eyes had slid closed as they hugged, opening slowly when hard little stomps sounded close to them. "Yes, dear?" he said to Audrey as she stopped in front of them.

"Where's  _ my _ hug?"

"Hey." Before he could begin to speak, Loki looked at Tony, who waited for Audrey to look at him, too.

"Darling, go play," he murmured to Jameson under his breath, who quietly obeyed.

"What is that? You don't go walking around demanding things like that." Audrey continued to pout, glancing at Loki briefly before looking back at Tony.

"But I want a hug too!"

Loki motioned to Tony then touched the little girl's arm. "Audrey…" She faced him, her hazel eyes starting to glisten, her tiny mouth turned down at the corners. Loki threw up a finger, wagging it at her. "No. No tears. You do not need to ask for hugs, my sweet girl. Nor should you demand them. Do you remember how you, Daddy and I talked about the new baby Auntie Sif is going to have?" She nodded, sniffled. "What did we tell you?"

"That I was gonna have a new brother or sister and that I had to, um, share you and Daddy with it."

Loki had to stifle a laugh at 'it' but nodded and tugged Audrey closer, letting her settle against him, making sure she didn't lean against his injured leg. "We are going to be very busy with the new baby, darling, but we will always have time for you. And Jameson and Sebastian. But the baby will need our help, all of us."

Tony rose and moved to sit beside Loki. "You have an important job, too, Monkey."

Her eyes widened as she turned in Loki's arms to face Tony. "I do?"

"You're the big sister," Ana offered quietly, patting a hand over a slightly fussing Xander's back. Audrey looked up at Ana, her dark brows furrowed slightly.

"Big sister? What does the big sister do?"

"Boss anyone younger than her around?" Rowan piped up from the floor.

"Shut up, Ro."

"Anastasia." Looking duly reprimanded, Ana looked at Loki and lowered her chin.

"Sorry." Smiling again, she shifted Xander so he was in a more comfortable position on her lap, and focused on Audi. "You're new brother or sister is gonna depend on you to take care of them, Audi, and make sure nothing and nobody hurts them. Especially when your Mom — I mean, your dads," she corrected with a small laugh, "aren't around."

"Yeah, she kinda does that, too. When she feels like it," he mumbled to a giggling Jameson, loud enough for them all to hear.

"You see?" Audrey looked up at Loki. "You're going to be to the new baby what Anastasia is to little Alexander there." At that moment, Xander laughed, tilting his head back to look up at his sister, pudgy, little fingers reaching for her face and latching onto a red curl.

Audrey giggled, looking up at Loki with a big smile. "The baby's gonna like me, huh?"

They all laughed and Loki gave her a one-armed hug. "Yes, my sweet girl," he said before placing a kiss at her temple. "He or she will love you to bits. As long as you're a good big sister."

"'Kay." Tears forgotten, she darted back to sit on the floor with Rowan and Jameson.

"I swear that kid is gonna give us more trouble than Bash or Jazz ever will combined," Tony muttered near Loki's ear. Loki leaned back into Tony, watching Audrey play with the boys, the hard set of her jaw as she took over whatever game it was they were playing.

"Don't jinx it, love."

"I'm gonna run to the bathroom." Tony kissed Loki's cheek, making sure he was sitting up comfortable before rising. Loki watched him go, and once he disappeared, turned to Ana and Xander.

"Anastasia."

"Yeah?" She looked up at him with a soft smile, bouncing Xander who reached out for Loki. To give her a break, Loki slipped his hands under Xander's arms and settled the chubby cheeked baby on his uninjured leg.

"I'm going to need your help, darling."

"With what, Uncle Loki?"

Like the seasoned father he was, Loki wiped up some of Xander's drool before he could get it on his clothes. "With Sebastian."

Her auburn brows furrowed. "Is he okay? He didn't…seem like himself."

Loki bit back a sigh, dodging grabby little fingers. "That's what I need your help with. You know, he isn't always willing to come to me, or his father." She hesitated before nodding slowly. "You two have a very…unique friendship. You probably know each other better than anyone else."

She blushed, brightly, and shrugged a shoulder. "I guess."

"We've been through…hmm. An event. I will leave it up to him if he wants to tell you more. The thing is, you might notice quicker than I if something is…off with him. Will you keep an eye on him for me…Princess?" He reached out to gently tug on a stray burgundy curl, like he often used to do with Natasha, a soft smile on his lips.

Ana had been looking up at him as he spoke, her green eyes, so much like Natasha's, going soft at the old nickname. Her eyes fell away from his face, and he could see the concern dim them the tiniest bit before they lifted again, back to him, the concern all but gone.

_ Just like Natasha _ , he thought.

"Yes,  _ dyadya _ . I'll keep an eye on him."

Loki's grin grew, recognizing the word for uncle in Russian. "Thank you." He glanced up just as Tony returned to the room, and spotted Clint coming down the hall. He laid a hand on Anastasia's arm. "There's your father."

Red hair whirled as Anastasia turned to look. "Dad!" She rose and ran straight to him. Clint hugged her close when she reached him.

"Hey, baby girl."

"Is Mama okay?" she asked, pulling back enough to look at him.

"She's fine." He cupped her cheeks, looking up at the others as Rowan, Jameson, and Audrey got to their feet. Tony moved to Loki to take Xander and help him up. "Baby's fine. And…Tasha's good."

"Awesome," Tony cheered, glancing at Loki when his fingers tightened around his. "What?"

Loki barely looked at him and released his hand. "Nothing. Are you going to keep us in suspense? Is the newest Barton a pretty little girl like her mother and sister?"

"Oh! Yeah! She's beautiful."

Anastasia let out a high-pitched squeal, throwing her arms around Clint again, as Jameson and Rowan groaned in unison. Tony moved toward them to smack them both upside the head, lightly, of course, before moving to congratulate his old friend. Loki hobbled his way over to do the same, using Anastasia to lean against after pulling away. She slid her arm around him to hold him up better.

"Everything's good. Tasha's sleeping now; she was pretty exhausted after all of that. But, um, they're gonna keep them both overnight, just to make sure they're okay. And, Mama being Mama," he said cupping Anastasia's cheek, "she kind of ordered me to take everyone home," he said with a laugh.

"Are you sure?" Loki asked quietly.

"Yeah — well, I'm gonna come back later. Stay the night with her. You can handle your brothers for the night, right?" he asked Anastasia, running his hand over her hair. She nodded.

"Sure, Daddy. No problem."

"They can stay at our house," Tony piped up. "Uh…if Loki's okay with that."

"You already offered, Anthony," he said with a chuckle. "It's fine," he said to Clint. "Anthony will have to feed them and watch them all, as I am incapacitated."

"Godda — arn it." He groaned, scoffed, rolled his eyes, but did it all with a smile.

"But you should get something to eat before you come back," Loki said to Clint, speaking softly, seriously.

"Yeah, absolutely. I'll grab a change of clothes for Natasha and the baby, too. It all happened so suddenly, we didn't really have a chance to come prepared." He blew out a breath, pushing a hand through his hair.

"Anthony, Anastasia, why don't you take the kids out to the cars and get them settled?" Loki suggested, nudging Anastasia toward his husband. "Give me a moment with my old friend here."

"Okay. Be careful helping him out, huh, Clint? I don't need him anymore broken." Tony reached for Loki's hand to press his lips to his knuckles, earning a sassy flutter of black lashes. He let Anastasia take Xander from him and held out his hand for Audrey. "Come on, rugrats. Let's blow this popsicle stand."

"Ooh, Dad, can we get popsicles on the way home?" Jameson ran to catch up with him, latching onto his free hand.

"No."

"Aww, please, Daddy!" Audrey chimed in.

"Yeah, please, Uncle Tony!" Rowan added.

The last thing Loki heard from Tony before he disappeared into the elevator with all the kids was a pained groan that made him smile. Sobering, he turned to Clint, eyeing his friend.

"I'd ask what went down, but I gather it's a long entailed story," he started, motioning toward Loki's leg.

"Yes. Very. Perhaps when Natasha returns home, we'll all sit down for coffee and tea and Anthony and I will divulge the entire saga." Clint laughed, but Loki only grinned tightly. "Clint." He went still, brows rising. "What didn't you tell us?"

For a brief moment, Clint tried to laugh Loki off, but then his breath hitched and he pressed a finger to the corner of his eye. "How the hell do you do that, man? Damn it…"

Loki laid a hand to Clint's arm, giving it a brief squeeze. "I've known you a long time, Clint. You don't hide things very well. From me, at least."

"Apparently." He breathed in deeply, his cheeks puffing out as he blew out the breath, and cleared his throat. "She sto…hm." He paused a moment, to collect himself. "She stopped breathing," he managed before pressing a fist to his mouth.

Loki pressed a hand to his heart. "Oh, that poor baby."

"No." Clint lifted bloodshot blue eyes to Loki, fighting tears again. "Natasha." Loki froze. "It was less than half a minute and they don't even know why she stopped breathing, but...I was talking to her and she closed her eyes and I thought — I thought she was just resting her eyes."

"Oh, gods," Loki whispered to himself, watching Clint's face turn red with the effort to fight his tears.

"Damn, Loki. What if I…what if she had —"

"Don't say it." Clint blinked and a few tears escaped before he covered his face with his hands. Having never seen him like this before Loki hesitated a little before stumbling forward to wrap his arms around him. "She's all right now, yes?" Clint nodded and sniffled. "And the baby's all right?"

"Yeah."

"That's all that matters." Loki pulled back, shakily breathing in. "We've had a lot of scares today, so let's just…bask in this happy for a while, shall we?"

"Yeah. Definitely. Yes, let's do that. Thanks, Loki." He smiled and Clint reached for his arm this time. "Let's get out there. The sooner I get food and some clothes, the sooner I can get back."

"Oh, I'm all right, I think. The pain medication has helped out quite a bit." But Loki took his arm anyway and they started for the elevator.

"You sure you guys can handle all the kids? They seemed a little hyped up today." The doors slid open just as they reached it and Clint let a few nurses exit before he helped Loki inside. Loki shook his head in answer.

"It's fine. Tony will manage; they will tire themselves out, and we will all celebrate Natasha and…Baby Girl Barton coming home tomorrow. Hopefully."

Clint grinned, as much as Clint ever grins, and nodded in agreement. "Charlotte Francine."

Loki cocked his head. "What?"

"That's what we named her. Charlotte Francine Barton."

The two long-time friends smiled at each other and Loki nodded his approval. "Beautiful."

"Yeah. I picked it," Clint chuckled, scratching at his head, blushing slightly. "Gonna call her Charlie, I think."

"Charlie Barton," Loki announced almost proudly. He chuckled and let Clint take his arm again as they started off the elevator and headed outside. "Sounds formidable. I fear her already."

"You and me both, man!" The two of them were still laughing when they reached their cars with their families buckled up inside.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translations:
> 
> Lette opp, min kjære gutt = Ease up, my dear boy.
> 
> Beklager, Pappa = Sorry, Pappa.


	19. Pancakes, Guilt Trips, and Sebastian's Acceptance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Starks begin to adjust to life without the threat of ’M’ hovering around them. Loki and Sebastian are still healing, in their own ways, and Tony is doing his best to keep the household running and spirits lifted, which includes urging Loki’s writing career.

In the days following the incident at the hotel, Tony found himself having to step up his househusband duties. Loki was still dealing with a slowly healing leg, and his attention was being pulled in all different directions, so Tony did everything he could to keep things as normal as possible for Jazz and Audi. A month had passed, and the routine of school, practices, appointments, and the rush toward the end of the school year was exhausting Tony to no end. He wasn't looking forward to the kids being on summer vacation in just two weeks. His only respite from the stress was an overly amused Loki, watching it all with no small amount of glee.

Tony groaned as his alarm sounded off early on a Saturday morning, smashed a fist to the snooze button, and rolled over to curl up to the warm body beside him. He was rewarded with a sleepy grunt. "Five more minutes," he grumbled into Loki's hair. He heard the creak of floorboards outside their door, a muffled shout from Jazz, a snicker from Bash, and groaned again. "So much for sleeping in," he whined, starting to shift away. A cool hand tightened around his forearm and pulled him back.

"Five more minutes," Loki mumbled, pressing back into him.

"Can't, baby. I gotta get Bash to his appointment and drop Jazz off at Barton's so he can catch a ride to the ball game. You've got Audi though." Tony kissed his cheek, several times with a dash of nuzzling, then rolled away. He headed for the door first, to make sure Bash and Jazz were awake and getting ready then made his way back to the room to shower.

Ten minutes later, his bedroom had turned into a madhouse. Loki was sitting up in the bed listening to Jazz rattle on about something that had happened at school, that he’d forgotten to share at dinner the night before, while Loki tied the laces of his cleats; Audi was jumping up and down on Tony's side of the bed asking no one in particular about breakfast then stopped to pull open the bedside drawer, while Bash stood in the doorway, silently watching it all with calm eyes. It took Tony dragging the younger two out by the ear so he could get dressed.

"It's not their fault, you know," Loki pointed out as Tony moved about the room pulling on his clothes. "I haven't been around as much as they're used to seeing me. And, no offense, darling, but I am a better active listener."

"I listen," Tony argued, receiving an amused and incredulous look from Loki. "All right, fine, so I'm not the greatest listener." Lacing up his tennis shoes, Tony stood and grabbed his wallet, stuffing it into his pocket before heading around the bed to kiss Loki goodbye. "Audi can hog you all she wants when I'm gone. And Jazz can have you tomorrow. How's the leg today?"

"Mm," Loki looked down at his leg, under the covers and still bandaged, and shrugged. "A pain in my arse."

"At least it's a cute ass." Tony laughed at the look Loki gave him and kissed his pout before rising. "You want me to help you downstairs?"

"No. I can manage. And Sebastian will be late if you don't leave now. Go."

"Okay. We'll be back after Jazz's game. Love you."

"I love you, too." Loki listened as Tony gathered the boys and left, arguments of who would get to ride shotgun commencing, and a short, quiet conversation with Audrey. He heard her footfalls coming back up the steps and counted down the seconds to when her little head would pop up around his door.

" _ Pappa? _ " Audrey peeked into the room briefly before pushing the door open fully, and Loki grinned because she had dressed herself in jean shorts and a purple top.

"What's wrong, love?" he asked, knowing full well what it was.

"Daddy wouldn't let me go with them," she said with a pout as she climbed onto the bed from Tony's side, crawling to plop next to Loki.

"He has a busy day planned with your brothers, darling. He wouldn't be able to keep up with you. And someone had to stay behind and keep me company, hmm?"

Audrey smiled shyly, ducking her chin into her shoulder, and moved closer to Loki. "I'll keep you company."

"Thank you," he murmured, wrapping an arm around his little girl. "You mentioned breakfast earlier. Shall we make something together?"

"Yeah," she answered, perking up.

"What would you like?"

"Umm…" She tapped a finger to her chin, contemplating. "How 'bout…pancakes?"

"We can do pancakes," Loki answered with a nod.

Excited now, and being left behind forgotten, Audrey moved onto her knees, bouncing again. "Can I put 'em on the cooker and everything?"

"It's called a griddle, my love. And, yes, you can. With my help," he added a bop to her nose.

She giggled and scrunched her nose up. "Okay! I'm gonna go downstairs and get started," she scooted to the end of the bed, making a mess of the blankets and skipped toward the door.

"Hold it." Audrey froze then slowly turned to face Loki, a mischievous little grin on her lips. "Do not turn anything on. You may take out the mix and grab a bowl, but you wait until I get there, do you understand?"

"Yes,  _ Pappa _ ," she nodded, and when she got the go-ahead, bolted out of the bedroom.

With some effort, eventually, Loki managed to dress himself and make his way downstairs to the kitchen. He had been given a cane to walk with while he healed, but he refused to use it. With Audrey propped up on a stool, together they mixed the batter and Loki guided her in scooping it up and pouring the batter to the griddle. They stood together, side by side, waiting for the first few cakes to brown. Audrey's eyes never left the stove, but Loki's drifted from the griddle to his little girl, reveling in the one-on-one time he was getting with her. He loved how attached she was to Tony, and understood why each of his children preferred his husband's lighter approach to parenting, but there were times, like this, when it was just him and one of them, that he could remind them he was just as much fun. He touched his fingers to her cheek, rubbing them against the softness of her skin.

"Did Bash do something bad?" Audrey suddenly asked out of nowhere.

Loki’s brows drew together, surprised at her question, then flipped two pancakes as he answered absently, "Not that I'm aware. Why?"

"'Cause he's gotta go to the 'syke-olgist.'"

Loki grinned and touched his finger to her chin, waiting for her to look up at him. When she did he sounded out the word for her. "Psy-chol-ogist."

"That's what I said!" The big smile on her face warmed Loki's heart.

"Say it again for me. How you heard me say it."

"Psy-chol-gist," she sounded out the word like she had heard it. Loki gave her chin a pinch and took up the spatula in his hand again.

"We'll work on it. Why would you think your brother had done something bad?" He bent his knees, just lifting a small part of one of the cakes to check the bottom.

"'Cause. When I was bad I had to go."

Loki went still, then slowly straightened. He forced back that familiar feeling of guilt seeping into him, and watched Audrey gently poke at a pancake then stick her finger in her mouth. "What…?" Brows drawn together over worried eyes, Loki switched off the heat.

" _ Pappa _ , wait! It's not done yet!"

"I know. Come here." Slipping his hands under her arms, Loki lifted Audrey from the stool, and set her to sit on the island, lowering to be eye level with her. "Audrey. Is that what you think? That Daddy and I sent you to the psychologist because you were bad?" She stared at him silently for a moment before slowly nodding. " _ Min skatt _ , no." Loki cupped her tiny face in both of his hands, shaking his head. "We sent you there to find out why you were acting out in school. Remember? We spoke of this. Do you remember that?"

"Yes," she whispered.

Loki turned to drag the stool closer and sat, taking Audrey's hands in his, holding them to rest on top of her knees. "Do you remember what the nice lady said when she explained why you were speaking with her?"

Audrey’s eyes darted around. "She said…um, that sometimes we did stuff but we didn't always know why."

"Yes. Exactly. Also, sometimes we experience something or something happens to us or someone we love and we don't know how to respond. Psychologists and therapists, and others, they can help us figure that out."

Her head tilted to the side slightly. "Is that what happened to Bash?"

He nodded slowly.  _ Smart girl _ . "Yes, darling. I'm afraid so. You see…" Loki studied her tiny fingers in his, searching for the right words. "Your brother saw something happen to Daddy and myself a long time ago. And then…again, more recently."

"Was it bad?"

Loki lifted his eyes to hers now, his thumb running over her fingers in one small swipe, and nodded again. "Yes. But I need you to understand that  _ he _ was not bad, Audrey. And neither are you. That is not why either of you were sent, do you understand?"

She nodded again. "…Yes…"

Loki wondered if she did understand, his brow furrowing as his eyes wandered over her small face. "Why didn't you say anything? You could have asked me or your father…at any time. We would have explained it better for you."

"I dunno…" She looked away, pulling her hand from Loki's grasp and bringing it to her mouth to gnaw at her thumbnail. Loki simply reached up and pulled her hand back down.

"Tell me, darling," he murmured. "I won't be angry or upset with you. I promise. But I'd very much like to know."

She lifted those big hazel-green eyes to his, slowly starting to glisten; her bottom lip pushed out. "Because I didn't want you to send me away."

Loki felt the drop of his jaw and quickly closed his mouth again. His chest ached at this revelation, but he did his best not to let it show. "I don't…why-why would we send you away, my sweet girl? We love you."

"I dunno," she mumbled again. "I thought that's why you wanted a new baby. And so — if I went to talk to the lady like you said, maybe you wouldn't send me away."

"Audrey…" Loki pushed up to gather the little girl in his arms, giving her a tight squeeze before pulling back and swiping at the dampness in her eyes. "We would  _ never _ send you away. And we are not having a new baby to replace anyone. Daddy and I love all of you so much, we just wanted…one more to love just as we love all of you." Her lips turned up on one side and Loki caught a glimpse of himself in her; the image of a lost little boy clinging to Frigga was mirrored in Audrey's face as her tiny hand curled around his wrist. "Don't ever think that I don't love you with all my heart, do you hear me?"

"Mmhmm," she nodded. He scooped her up again, clutching her close even as he leaned most of his weight against the island, sighing in relief when her tiny arms wound around his neck, her legs around his torso, tightly. " _ Pappa? _ " she whispered after a few moments of silence passed.

"Yes, darling?"

"Can we finish the pancakes now?"

Loki laughed, a watery one, as he set Audrey back on the island. He turned away to turn the heat back on, and discreetly wiped at his own tears, then returned the stool to its place by the stove and Audrey to stand atop it. Later, once she was happily settled at the dining table, munching away, a calmer Loki slid onto a stool at the counter and pulled out his phone.

_ "I could kill you!" _

Loki frowned at the words coming from the other line. "Well, that's a lovely way to say hello."

_ "What? Oh. Sorry," _ Natasha muttered, not sounding anywhere near apologetic.  _ "Hi, Loki. Clinton Francis Barton, if you do not stop fussing over me…" _

_ "I'm just trying to help,  _ sweetheart _." _

Loki chuckled at the strained words coming from Clint, and brought the wrath of Natasha back to focus on him.  _ "You laughing at something, beanpole?" _

"A little bit, yes. Is this a bad time?"

_ "No. Your kid’s here and Clint was just about to leave. Hold on." _ Loki heard a brief swipe and when Natasha spoke again, her voice was more distant.  _ "Go. I'll be fine. I have taken care of three other babies you know?" _

_ "I know, but, honey —" _

_ "If you 'but, honey' me, one more time, Clint…" _ Loki nibbled on a dry pancake as he listened to the exchange. He was sipping on milk when Natasha returned to the line.  _ "Okay. What's up?" _

"Nothing. I wanted to find out how you're doing." He popped another piece of pancake into his mouth as she answered.

_ "I'm going nuts in this bed, that's how I'm doing. I need to be up and doing shit. There's packing to be done. I feel like such a fucking invalid. And a horrible mother for making my kids do all the damn work." _

"You experienced a difficult birth, darling."  _ And nearly died _ , he thought, but didn't dare say. "You need your rest."

_ "I guess. How's things over there? Bash doing any better? He's been texting Ana a lot, so I'm assuming he is." _

Loki hummed noncommittally, glancing up when Audrey brought her plate to him and announced she was done. "Leave your plate in the sink. Go wash your hands and brush your teeth."

"Do I hafta?" Loki gave her a stern look and she winced. "Okay, okay. I don't like it when you make that face,  _ Pappa _ ," she said as she turned away.

"Don't make me give it to you." He laughed when she scoffed and listened to her steps ascending the stairs. "I understand your frustration," he said into the phone.

_ "Still can't move around a lot, huh?" _

"Not really. Once I've taken the pain medicine I'm fine. Physical therapy starts this week. Hopefully, it'll help."

_ "Use the cane, Loki." _

"No," he nearly pouted. "I am not an old man. I can get by without it."

_ "Fine, you stubborn ass." _ A brief moment of quiet passed.  _ "…And Bash?" _

Loki set down his fork, sighing softly. "I'm not sure, to be honest, Natasha. He seems fine when he's with his brother and sister. Or Sif. And obviously, he's conversing with Anastasia, in some form. With Anthony and I, he's…quiet."

_ "Well, Ana won't say what they talk about, so I'm just as in the dark as you. And I'm not one of those mothers that compulsively tracks her kids messages." _ Loki snorted.  _ "Shut up, I'm  _ not _. But, seriously. Does he seem okay? Is he sleeping? Is he having any nightmares?" _

"Mm. He seems to be sleeping fine. Jameson hasn't said anything to the contrary; not that I would expect him to. They've been getting along much better than they usually do. There have been some nights, I can hear him and I know he's dreaming. He speaks, but it's unintelligible, and he almost calms himself down before he fully wakes."

_ "What, are you standing outside his door, checking if he's breathing?" _

Loki frowned at the phone. "Like you wouldn't do the same?" There was a slow inhale, as if Natasha was ready to speak, but only silence followed. "That's what I thought. There is nothing wrong with me worrying. It would be a tragedy if I didn't."

A sigh was heard on the other line.  _ "I know. He'll get through it, Loki. He's a strong kid, and — oh, damn, hold on." _ The phone rustled on the other line and the faint sound of fussing then crying came through. Loki smiled as he listened to Natasha murmur to Charlie, quieting her cries with soft coos.

If their college selves could see them now.

" _ Pappa _ , can I watch TV?" Audrey asked as she came down the steps again, smiling sweetly at him.

"Mm, yes, but keep the volume low. And only for an hour!" He shouted back, after checking his watch. He heard a defeated  _ 'aw, man' _ just before the TV was switched on.

_ "Loki?" _

"Hmm?"

_ "Sorry, I'm back. She's just hungry again." _

"That's all right. Is she feeding better now?" he asked, remembering the trouble Natasha had had breastfeeding while still in the hospital.

_ "Oh, yeah. She's good now. Latches on like a pro. So, how about you and Tony? Things better in that department? I imagine you'd be tearing down buildings like Godzilla if it weren't." _

A small smile curved Loki's lips, a snicker escaping him at his best friend's words. "Oh, hush, you. Honestly, that might be the only area where we've seen improvement.."

_ "Yeah? Good. So, are you guys doing it like bunnies again?" _ she laughed, but it was cut short by a hiss when Charlie dug a fingernail into her skin.

Loki laughed with her. "Really, Natasha. How old are you again?"

_ "Younger than you! And please. Most of the shit I learned to do in the bedroom I heard about from you!" _ She chose to ignore the offended gasp-laugh heard on the other line.  _ "Besides, this is you and Tony we're talking about. Sex is kind of a given with you two." _

"Well, if you must know…"

"I must."

He chuckled, glanced toward the living room to make sure Audrey wasn't within earshot. "We talk a lot more. Aside from simply about the children, I mean. We haven't actually…been intimate yet," he said, lowering his voice. "It's difficult with my leg. But…it's nice actually. At night, once the kids are down, and it’s just the two of us, we just lay in bed and…talk."

_ "Well, good. Enjoy that. Because in about four months, you can forget all about those quiet moments." _

Loki laughed out loud. "Thank you. I've not forgotten, I promise."

_ "Lena speaking to you yet?" _

"A little. She's easing up on us. Slowly. She's one of those that mellows when she's pregnant, usually. Took awhile to kick in, but she's coming around again." He glanced up when he heard Audrey laugh at something on the television and frowned slightly as he rose from the stool. "Listen, I better go. It's rare when I get Audrey all to myself. And I need to spend some time with her."

_ "Of course, of course. Give her a kiss for me. And do me a favor? Tell Bash no more texts after midnight. I don't need my kid having bags under her eyes before she reaches her teen years." _

"I'll speak to him. Take care, darling. And…go easy on Clint, would you? Remember: he loves you."

_ "Yeah, yeah. I love the nutball, too. Bye." _

* * *

Loki sat with Audrey for some time on the sofa, watching some loud, flashy cartoon she enjoyed, before her attention wandered away and she decided she wanted to color. Her books and crayons were spread across the dining table, and Loki took up a few crayons coloring in a picture of a Disney princess in a book that Audrey apparently never colored in. After awhile, she got bored again, and headed into the backyard to play on the swingset. Loki poured himself a glass of iced tea, grabbed the most recent book he'd been reading, and settled on the back porch bench to keep an eye on her. They hadn't been outside more than fifteen minutes when Loki heard Tony's car drive up and car doors slamming. He called to Audrey to come inside, and limping slightly, walked back into the house just as Tony entered, the blurs of Sebastian and Jameson heading straight upstairs behind him.

"Hey, babe," Tony greeted absently, his phone in one hand, mail in the other. "Got a few houses sent to us to look at later. L.A., Pacific Palisades, Malibu…" he sighed wearily, dropping the mail onto the counter, looking up just in time to see Loki hobbling toward the counter. "What are you doing? Why are you walking around? You're not supposed to be on your leg. Why aren't you using the cane?"

Loki threw up a hand to silence him and chuckled. "Why are you talking to me like I'm an adult, Anthony?"

"Loki —"

"I have been sitting most of the day. Audrey and I made…" He trailed off, looking around, before turning back toward the back door. "Audrey! I said come inside!"

_ "Okay, I'm coming!" _

Tony was still giving him a look when he turned back and Loki forced back an irritated sigh. "Anthony. I'm fine."

"You're not  _ fine _ . You're limping and hobbling." Jameson's footsteps came thundering down the stairs, skidding as he reached the bottom, and before Tony could say more, Jameson ran straight to Tony.

"Dad, can you help me with my science project? I don't know what to do for it, but maybe you can help me choose?"

Tony turned his eyes from Loki down to Jameson, plopping a hand to his spiked hair. "Sure, buddy. What are the options?"

"Uhh…hold on. I gotta get the paper." He took off again, as quickly as he had arrived, and left Tony laughing.

"Why didn't you just bring it with you?"

_ "I forgot!" _

"I swear, that kid." His attention was back on his phone, and the houses they were considering, scrolling through photos of each when Loki sidled up to him, a bowl of grapes in his hand. "What?"

Loki grinned and shook his head, offering a grape to Tony. Tony eyed the green fruit then parted his lips for Loki to feed to him. "Perhaps he just wanted to make sure he had your attention first."

" _ Pappa _ ," Audrey broke the moment as she finally came back into the house, using all her might to slide the heavy glass door closed. "I'm hungry," she announced, stomping straight up to Loki. Then she spotted Tony. "Hi, Daddy!"

"Hi!" He mimicked, catching her as she leapt into his arms after Loki moved aside. He leaned on one elbow and combed down Audrey's hair, messy from her running around.

"You just had breakfast not too long ago, my dear." She turned in Tony's arms to look at him and shrugged, patting her belly.

"Sorry. My tummy is growling again."

"Another bottomless pit. Great," Tony muttered as he sorted through the mail.

"That's not true, Daddy," Audrey argued, turning to look at him with a frown on her little face. "I have bottoms on."

Tony looked at Loki and they both stifled chuckles. "That's, ha, that's not what I meant, Monkey. I meant your tummy is never full." He grabbed at her belly, tickling and scratching, making Audrey giggle hysterically. While Tony busied himself tickling Audrey to death, Loki limped into the kitchen to grab a knife and a piece of fruit from a nearby bowl and sliced up a green apple, putting it on a plate with a glob of peanut butter.

"Here, darling." Tony finally stopped and set Audrey, still catching her breath, onto the stool at the counter. "That should suffice until dinner."

"Thank you," she sang, picking up a slice and dipping it in the peanut butter.

"You're welcome." Loki looked toward the living room as Jameson re-entered waving a paper excitedly at Tony.

"Dad, look. These are my choices." Tony took the paper, reading over it quickly and scoffing.

"This is it? Any one of these would be a cinch, Jazz."

Loki hummed, popping a grape into his mouth. "For a scientific genius with several degrees, I imagine they are."

"Shut it," Tony retorted, not yet lifting his eyes from the paper. When he did, he bobbed his brows at Loki. "You didn't hear me say anything when you practically dictated that short story for him a couple months ago, did you, Professor English Lit?"

Loki's smile was slow and amused. "Touché," he said with a chuckle, wiping his hands on a dry towel. "I'm going up to check on Sebastian. Watch her," he said to Tony, nodding toward Audrey.

"Mmhmm." Tony glanced at his happily munching little girl before looking back at Loki, still leaning heavily on his good leg. "Be careful going up the steps, would you? I don't need you pulling a Scarlet O'Hara down the steps."

"Stop fussing, would you?" He moved next to Tony, puckering his lips for a kiss, which Tony easily offered. "I can manage." He started for the steps, but Tony tugged him back for one more kiss and Loki happily indulged him.

As he headed out of the kitchen, Loki could hear Jameson begin to talk excitedly about which project he wanted to do and Tony demand a bite of apple from Audrey. By the time he reached the top of the steps, Loki was feeling a little winded and had to pause to catch his breath. He could see that Sebastian and Jameson's door was slightly ajar, and stepped toward it, smiling to himself because the music playing was an old album of Tony's. Something loud and metal that they used to listen to together back in college. He knocked lightly, peeking his head in, spying Sebastian lying back on his bed, staring up at the ceiling, feet tapping to the driving beat of the music. At the knock, he lifted his head from his pillow, and Loki nudged the door open further.

"Hello."

"Hi."

"How was your session?"

Sebastian jerked a shoulder and shifted to rest his head back on the pillow and still have Loki in his view. "It was okay," he murmured. Concerned, Loki stepped in further, pausing and sighing softly when his leg hit the edge of Sebastian's bed. Sebastian shot up, moving toward Loki.

"Are you all right? You didn't hurt yourself, did you?"

Loki lifted a hand to ward him off. "I'm fine." Breathing out slowly as the slight ache subsided, Loki crossed to Sebastian's desk and lowered the music then moved back to his bed, sitting at the end of it. "So, why was your session only 'okay'? Is it helping at all? You will tell us if it isn't, won't you?"

Sebastian bent his legs to make room for his father, and rested his arms on top of his knees, nodding at Loki's last question. "It's fine. Promise. It's just…I was thinking. Can I ask you something?"

Loki shifted to face him better, moving a little closer. "Of course."

"H…how come you never talked about… _ it? _ "

Black brows came together. "About what…?"

Sebastian stared at him for a few moments and visibly swallowed. "What that man did to you. Wh-what you did to  _ him _ ."

Loki was stunned frozen for several seconds. This was the moment he had feared for eight years. Taking a deep breath, he steeled himself for this conversation. Forcing himself to relax, he turned up one side of his mouth slightly, attempting to look much more calmer than he felt. "It was…not exactly polite dinner conversation." Sebastian's quasi-grin matched Loki's, but Loki could see he wasn't happy with that answer. Loki reached out, hesitantly, to rest his hand on one of Sebastian's arms. "You were very young when it happened, Sebastian. You had nightmares then, after what happened at the Greenwich apartment. For a month or so. They were…terrifying, for us. I cannot imagine what they were like for you. But…then your father and I were married. And Jameson came along…" He grinned more, looked up at Sebastian, and gave his arm a squeeze. "You had forgotten; I was not going to be the one to remind you."

He seemed to absorb that, and to Loki's relief, nodded.

Loki pulled his hand back, folding them both in his lap. "Neither was it one of my better moments.” It went silent between them for a moment; Loki’s mind raced with several questions. “May I ask what brought this up?"

"My therapist…he thinks…" Sebastian shook his head as if shaking off a thought. "When I try to remember what happened at the hotel, I mention stuff that didn't happen —  _ then _ . He thinks I'm confusing it with what happened —"

"The day at the apartment," Loki finished for Sebastian, horrified. Lowering his head and his eyes to his bed, Sebastian nodded again. Loki sighed heavily, lifted a hand to cover his face, then dropped it to his chest. "I am so sorry, love. I…I've not done a very good job of protecting you, have I?"

"No, no." Scooting closer, Sebastian set his feet on the floor. "But you have. The therapist said this was a good thing."

"How?" he asked incredulously.

"He said that I wasn't old enough to deal with it then. That's why, in my head, I, like, buried it. Forgot about it. But, now that I'm older, I can work through it, and — so I can deal with it. And it won't…inhibit me."

Even as he fought tears, Loki grinned, feeling a rush of pride. He ran his hand over Sebastian's dark hair, much like he had with Audrey. But he dropped his hand when Sebastian shied away from the affection.

"Did, did I ever tell you what my nightmares were about back then?"

Loki sobered, nodded. "You did. Why?"

_ He shrugged and bit his lip. "Do you think you could come with me next time and tell me and the therapist what they were about?" _

The idea of rehashing all of that made Loki nervous, but he didn't want Sebastian to see it, and did his best to suppress it. "Is that what you want? Or is that what your therapist wants?"

"No, me. Maybe it would help…"

Thinking it over briefly, Loki agreed. "If you're sure."

Sebastian's brow furrowed. "You don't think it's a good idea?"

"It's not that, no. I…" He sighed again, thinking of his words. "I want to help you,  _ elskling _ . I want you to be able to move past all of this. I'm just not completely sure how reminding you of such a traumatic event would help."

"Well…I can't get over it until I know what I need to get over. Right?"

"That would be correct." Loki grinned slowly, chuckled softly. "You're growing up too fast, Sebastian. I hate that you cannot stay my little boy forever."

Predictably, Sebastian scoffed and rolled his eyes. "I hate to break it to you,  _ Pappa _ , but I'm not a little boy anymore."

"I know." His eyes on Sebastian, Loki reached to cup his face, turning him to look directly into his eyes. "But neither are you grown up yet, Sebastian." He lifted a brow, silently asking if the teen understood. He nodded yes and Loki released him. "Be patient with me, darling. I've a good, maybe five years left, before you leave me and go out into that big, scary world on your own."

Sebastian's shoulders rose and fell. "Well…then you and Dad just have to make sure you really prepare me for it." Taking pause, Loki studied his face. After a moment, Sebastian started to squirm. "What? Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Have I told you lately how very proud of you I am?"

"Aw, man… _ Pappa _ …don't start…"

"No…" Loki laughed as Sebastian tried to get away and pulled him back to sit beside him again. "Sebastian. With all that you've been dealing with these past few weeks, I didn't know how you were handling it. You are no longer that little boy you were years ago, when you would simply come and sit with me or crawl into bed with me, and your little fingers would tug at my hair, and we would talk for hours. But that was back when you used to talk to me. About everything."

Sebastian was grinning as Loki spoke, even reached up to playfully tug at Loki's long, dark locks, but he sobered quickly, dropping his hand and looking away. "It's not that I don't want to, you know."

Loki pondered that for a beat. "No? Then what is it?"

Sebastian snuck a glance at Loki, but quickly darted his eyes away, shrugged. "I dunno. It's dumb."

" _ Elskling _ ." Loki hadn't meant to sound so harsh, but he realized the word came out sharper than he had intended when Sebastian looked at him with wide eyes. So he softened his voice, but still spoke firmly. "Nothing you could ever tell me would be dumb. You don't have to talk to me about everything. I just want you to know that you can."

Those soft green eyes of Sebastian’s darkened right before Loki, an expression of determination sliding into place as Sebastian huffed softly. "I  _ know _ I can,  _ Pappa _ . But how come  _ you _ can't talk to  _ me? _ "

Loki angled his head to the side, not completely pleased with Sebastian's tone, but he chose to let it slide. "What do you mean? I do talk to you."

"No, you don't. You didn't tell me about that lady and what she was doing. You didn't tell me that you and Dad were having problems. And I kept asking and you kept saying everything was okay.  _ Both _ of you did. And it wasn't! I really thought you were going to get a divorce." Sebastian's voice started to rise as he spoke, then cracked on the word 'divorce.' An old force of habit had Loki looking over his shoulder and rushing to quiet him.

"Keep your voice down. And listen to me. That's a very different situation, Sebastian. I am not obligated to talk to you about my problems, whether or not they involve your father. Frankly, it is none of your business what goes on in my marriage.  _ We _ are responsible for  _ you _ . I don't ask to be nosy. I ask because I am concerned for your well-being."

Sebastian made an angry noise of frustration in his throat that jarred Loki. He'd made that noise himself. Often. "You lied to me."

Loki didn't have it in him to argue, so, again, he let this slide. "When you're a little older, and you have experienced a relationship for yourself, perhaps you will understand why that kind of problem must remain between the two parties involved." The stern look he was receiving from Sebastian gave Loki a tiny glimpse of the adult waiting to emerge from within.

Sebastian scoffed, pulling Loki from his thoughts. "Like, you didn't talk to Aunt Tasha about it." It was more an accusation than a question and Loki shook his head.

"Not in detail, no, I did not. I don't share everything with her, Sebastian. Do you share everything with Anastasia?" Sebastian's response was to press his lips together then clucked his tongue in exasperation. Dropping his head into his hand, Loki rubbed at his temple, pulling back his rising temper, searching for a way to ease Sebastian's. " _ Sønn _ , did you ever think I didn't tell you because speaking of it out loud made it all the more true?"

Sebastian watched him silently, processing. "What does that mean?" he asked quietly.

"Your father has been an important part of my life since I was eighteen. The time we spent apart was…difficult for us both. I can't imagine what my life would be without him as my husband, my partner." He looked to Sebastian. "Your  _ father _ ." He watched some of the anger ebb from Sebastian's eyes. "None of that is anything to be discussed with your  _ child _ ."

Sebastian's shoulders twitched, guilt sweeping across him, if his body language said anything, for pressuring Loki to tell him that, and his head bobbed in an awkward nod. It went quiet between them, again, and trying to lighten the mood, Sebastian nudged Loki's arm and said, "Maybe you and Dad should go to therapy, too…"

Loki looked at him, a forced laugh in his throat. But remembering his conversation with Audrey, and wanting to be more open with Sebastian, as he apparently wanted, he hesitated only a moment before responding, "Actually…we are."

Sebastian's jaw dropped. "I was just kidding."

"I know," he laughed. "Your father and I are not perfect, Sebastian. We have our own issues that we need to work through. But we love each other very much. We infuriate each other — often. He more than I. And, like all couples, we get into silly arguments about insignificant things. But there is no one in this world with whom he or I would rather have those silly arguments."

As kids often did when their parents spoke of love, Sebastian blushed lightly and avoided Loki's gaze. Bumping his feet against the frame of his bed, his voice was low when asked, " _ Pappa _ , do you think I'll have to go to therapy forever?"

"No." He smiled affectionately when Sebastian looked at him with eyes full of surprise. "I think you're much stronger than you give yourself credit for, my love." He cupped his chin, giving it a light shake. "Going to therapy does not make you weak. Being scared, feeling anxious, even having a cry now and then — none of these are things of which you should be ashamed. If and when you feel it's not helping anymore, you tell me. Or your father. But all of this is only meant to make you a better, more well-rounded adult. Yes?"

Sebastian nodded. "I hope it does."

"It will." Loki softened his hold on his chin then dropped it to give his leg a pat before he pushed up to stand. "Well. I just wanted to see how you were doing." He grunted softly as he straightened and turned toward the door.

"… _ Pappa? _ "

"Hmm?" He paused, half-turned, and began to turn back, going completely still when Sebastian was suddenly there with his arms wrapped around him; his own arms pinned to his sides.

"I know I don't say it often. But… _ Jeg elsker deg. _ "

"Oh…" His lips stretching wide, Loki pulled his arms from Sebastian's hold to hug him back, even tighter. "Now, that wasn't so hard, was it?" Sebastian snickered against him and stepped back and Loki resisted the urge to keep him close. "In no way am I complaining, but I am wondering…what that was for?"

Again, Sebastian shrugged. "To say I'm sorry, for…being such a shi — er, jerk, to you and…" His brows came together, and Loki recognized guilt when he saw it. "I shouldn't have gotten in the car."

Briefly, he cupped Sebastian's cheek. "No, you shouldn't have. You put yourself, and us, in danger. But I know — at least, I hope — you did it because you were concerned about your father and I."

"It was. I — I did. I knew something was going on. But…” His shoulders rose and fell again. “I still shouldn't have butted in."

"Family trait," Loki muttered with a grin, and a fleeting thought to Thor. A dull ache began to pulse in Loki's thigh, and he slowly lowered to the bed again. "Listen…" He touched a hand to Sebastian's arm and he sat again, too. "I do appreciate and accept your apology. And I'm touched that you care enough about your father and I to be so proactive, but, darling, you have to know where to draw the line. You cannot fix everything." Sebastian didn't argue, simply nodded. "As for the 'jerk' thing…" He laughed, sighed. "You're only twelve."

Sebastian opened his mouth to speak, but Loki beat him to it.

"Almost thirteen, yes, I know. There will be many moments to come when I will infuriate you, too; when I will tell you no; when I will make you do something you don't want to do. We may fight. We will definitely argue. But it's all a part of life. All fathers and sons do it. Odin and I were famous for them," he said in a lowered tone, making Sebastian laugh. "There will be times you will irritate and annoy me, too. Just do me a favor, and in the moment,  _ try _ to remind yourself that I do these things, not to purposely upset you or to be cruel, but because I love you, and sometimes — albeit, not always — but sometimes, I really do know better. Can you do that for me?"

"I won't make a promise I don't know if I can keep.” His smile grew wide at Loki’s straight face. “But I can try."

"Good,” Loki said with a laugh. “It's all growing pains,  _ elskling _ ."

"Hah, that's what Dad said."

_ "Well, your father is an intelligent man and he had more troubles with his father than you and I ever will. Much as I wish you didn't sometimes, you really do take after him," he said affectionately, brushing his fingers through Sebastian's hair in the same manner. "That's a little scary, to be honest." _

Sebastian breathed a chuckle. "You're the only one who says that, you know," he muttered, pleasing Loki by not dodging his hand this time. "Everybody else tells me I act like  _ you _ . Especially Dad and Mama."

It secretly thrilled Loki to hear that, but he did well to suppress it. "Hm. I know how much that bothers you, but…"

"No." Loki cocked a brow at the way Sebastian rushed to say the word, pulling his hand back, and Sebastian rolled his eyes. "Yeah, okay, it used to. Before."

"Before what?"

"Before when I thought…it was before I realized that you're actually kind of…badass." He smiled so brilliantly Loki was almost distracted.

"I —" He scoffed audibly. "I'm really not, Sebastian."

"You were with that lady in the hotel," he said with a shrug that belied the excitement that lit up his eyes.

"I was protecting what is mine. There is a difference." He flicked at the hair covering Sebastian's eye then grazed his cheek with the same fingers. "My darling, there is no denying you have my sass and my smarts. And you've no idea how frustrating it is that you have my attitude. But…" He reached for Sebastian's hand, bringing it to his lips to press a light kiss to his fingers, then pressed Sebastian's palm to his own chest. "You have the heart of your mother."

Sebastian had sobered as Loki spoke, but at his last revelation, the smile that bloomed across his face had Loki's eyes stinging. "Really? I do?"

"Mmhmm. You love fiercely and unforgivably, just like her."

He chuckled shyly and Loki released their hands. "Thanks. You know…it's not so bad being like you. I guess."

"Thanks," Loki replied, tongue firmly in cheek.

"And Mama. And a little bit like Dad."

"Please. Don't be anymore like your father. I've already got Jameson, and frankly, even  _ he's _ too much like him sometimes. Then there is my little diva. She didn't get it  _ all _ from me."

"What's wrong with being like Dad?" he asked on a tickled laugh.

"Yeah, what's wrong with being like Dad?" Tony questioned as he kicked the door open further and entered the room, stopping to stand by Loki.

"You eavesdrop, for one thing," Loki said, looking up at his husband.

"What lies you tell, Trickster. That wasn't eavesdropping." Casually, as if it was an old habit — and it was — Tony slipped a hand under Loki's hair, massaging lightly at his scalp. "I just came up to see what was going on. You've been up here for awhile. Everything all right?"

"It's fine, darling. We were just…talking." Sebastian nodded in agreement, and Loki reached up for Tony's hand, lacing their fingers and checking Tony's watch. "Should we start thinking about dinner?"

Tony shook his head. "Nope. Dinner's set."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, Barton called. Asked if we'd be up to coming over and helping pack up the rest of their stuff. He bribed us with pizza and beer. Forgot to ask me at the game earlier."

"Well, I can't lift anything, and Jameson has to do his school project."

"Not a problem, babe." He scored a finger down Loki's cheek, his hand still in the other's. "You can sit back and relax and give Natasha a break from Charlie. And Jazz is already working on his little hovercraft. He won't be long."

"Are you sure? I don't want him to rush it."

"Baby, he's fine. He's a Stark. He can do this in his sleep."

Loki snorted. "Well…I suppose it would be nice to spend some time in the house before they leave. And you can talk to Anastasia in person, for once," he said to Sebastian nudging his shoulder. Sebastian frowned but blushed at the same time.

"What…? I don't know what you're talking about."

"Speaking of lies," Loki murmured before pointing a stern finger at his son. "No more texting after midnight. I hear about it again, I'm taking your phone away for a month."

Sebastian started to protest, but knew exactly how Loki found out and how he would hear about it again, so he relented. "Fine," he muttered, his bottom lip pushing out.

"Something I don't know about?" Tony interjected. Loki looked up and shook his head.

"I'll fill you in later." Tony was about to argue with him, but a screech from downstairs interrupted.

_ "Daaaaad!" _

"Whaaaaaat?" Tony laughed when Loki smacked their joined hands against his stomach. The pounding of feet was heard coming up the stairs and then Jameson was bursting into his own room, running up to Tony. "What's up, kid?"

"I'm almost done," he said with a big smile, nearly out of breath.

"Already?"

"Yeah. Wanna come see?"

"Yeah, absolutely. Get it all set it up, call us when it's ready. We'll be down in a sec."

Jameson darted out of the room just as Audrey stomped in, slightly pouting, and moved to stand in the center of the room, arms crossed, tiny little hip popped out. "Why's everyone in here without me?"

"We're planning to run away and leave you behind," Sebastian answered without missing a beat. A snicker sounded from Tony, but he turned serious quickly at the look Loki shot him.

"Dude…" was his attempt at scolding Sebastian.

Loki bumped his elbow into his arm. "You know, she's going to believe you." Sebastian scoffed, nearly laughing. Loki looked at Audrey, her eyes wide, her mouth hanging open, and shook his head. "He was only joking, Audrey. We're not going anywhere." He looked pointedly at Sebastian.

As usual, he rolled his eyes, and slowly got to his feet. "I was totally kidding, Audi. We're not leaving you," he mumbled half-heartedly, stepping closer to her. Her head dipped back more as he did, her bottom lip pushed out.

"You're mean, Bash."

"Yeah, sometimes. Still love you though, you brat." He held out his hands to her, beckoning her with his fingers. Pout vanished, Audrey's eyes lit up and her arms shot up so Sebastian could lift her into his. He said something as they walked out and Audrey's giggle echoed as they headed down the steps. Loki grinned at the sight and looked back at Tony. His jaw was practically on the floor.

"What's that look for?" He touched a finger to Tony’s bearded chin, urging it back up. He pointed limply at the door.

"Who the hell was that? That wasn't the kid that was in my car on the way home."

"He's in a good place, Anthony. Don't question it," he said, gesturing for his husband to help him up.

"I won't." Tony moved forward, taking Loki's hands and pulled him to his feet. "Guess that means you two had a good talk then?" he asked, slipping his arms around Loki's waist.

"We did." His grin faded a little. "He’s asked me to go with him to his next appointment."

Tony stiffened a little. "Why?"

"He wants me to describe, in front of his therapist, the nightmares he had…back then…" Loki's eyes searched Tony's when he felt his husband tense even more in his arms. Tony frowned and shook his head.

"That a good idea?"

Loki shrugged one shoulder. "Sebastian seems to think so."

"Do  _ you? _ "

"I…am inclined to let him decide."

Tony seemed to relax, breathing out slowly, and dropped his head to Loki's shoulder, pulling him close against him. "You think he's getting better? That all this therapy is helping him?"

Loki ran his hands over Tony's back, nodded. "I do. He's not as traumatized as he was…after. He's opening up. Slowly. He'll be fine." He contemplated quietly for a moment. "Anthony." His face buried in the crook of Loki's neck, all Tony did was hum in question. "…I told him. Sebastian. That we are also receiving counseling."

Loki blinked at the speed with which Tony pulled back, his eyes flashing. "Loki."

"I know," he murmured at the soft, but firm reprimand from his husband.

Tony stepped back more, released Loki's hands, and clenched his jaw. "I thought we agreed we weren't going to tell anybody," he said, his voice rising gradually.

Loki wobbled a little when Tony let go of him, and he stumbled to find his balance. Still, he raised his hands, pleading with Tony. "Keep your voice down. You're starting to yell."

"You agreed. Why did you tell him?"

"Will you let me explain?" He gestured for Loki to continue, then crossed his arms crossly. "Firstly, he  _ suggested _ we should go." He paused, waiting for Tony's reaction, which was to straighten his back, but he said nothing. "I didn't want to lie to him. And I didn't want him to think it was something to be ashamed of."

_ "I'm not ashamed. But…you were the one who said you didn't want anybody else involved in our relationship anymore, Loki. You can't just back pedal on me like this. You said —" Loki threw up another hand, holding onto his steadily increasing frustration. _

"Let me finish," he said calmly.

"Fine, finish," Tony muttered stubbornly.

This time, Loki's jaw clenched. "Audrey thought we sent her to the psychologist because she was…'bad.'" The angry look on Tony's face melted away, his arms dropped to his side.

"She…what?"

"She also thought we were having a new baby to…" He sighed, the thought making his heart hurt.

"To what?"

"Replace her."

Tony brought a hand to his face, rubbing at his jaw as he dropped to Jameson's bed. "Jesus." Loki crossed the space between the boys’ beds intending to sit, but because of his leg, remained standing instead.

"It's fine now. I think. I explained everything as much as I could."

"Yeah…" He lifted his gaze to Loki. "Why would she think that, babe?"

Loki knew the flare of temper from Tony had subsided when he heard that endearment. He shrugged, a small smile ghosting around his lips. "She's ours. She has an imagination on her."

"She is. And she does." Because it was close, Tony took Loki's hand, holding his knuckles to his bearded mouth, keeping it in place as he got to his feet again. "You fixed it all again, though. So thanks." He gave the hand a squeeze and lowered their joined ones between them. That was the closest to an apology Loki would get, he knew.

"You would have done the same."

"Maybe. Would've taken me longer." Absently, Tony trailed a finger along the band of Loki's jeans, under his shirt. "Did you tell anyone else?" he asked in a lower voice, eyes flicking up, sharply on Loki's. Distracted by the finger, he belatedly noticed Tony's dark expression.

"No."

"Not even Natasha?"

"No," he said on a laugh. "I told you; I wasn't planning on telling Sebastian. I just wanted to be honest with him."

"All right. I believe you." He smirked at Loki and laid his hands on his slim waist. "You know, you should take up one of those book offers you got after all that shit went down. Then you can let the whole world know what's going on in the Stark family."

Loki bristled. "You don't mean that."

He shrugged. "Partly no. But…"

"But…?" Loki urged him to continue.

Tony angled his head, an incredulous look on his face. "Babe. It's gonna come out sooner or later. Headlines will scream about Tony Stark's kids being in therapy and rumors will fly about you and me and our marriage." His head lowered again, eyes unfocused on the floor.

Loki lifted his hands, trailing the pads of his fingers along Tony's jaw, but he didn't force Tony to look at him. "Then why would you want me to author a book about our family?" he asked in a soft murmur.

"Because…" Taking each of Loki's hands, Tony pressed a kiss to both of his wrists then looked at him. "At least you'd be telling the truth." Loki gave him a sympathetic smile and curled his fingers around Tony's. "Admit it, Loki. Your life and my life alone are worthy of their own best-sellers. Together…? And under your deft hand?  _ That _ book will put other biographies to shame."

Loki breathed a laugh, lips slightly turned up, but his brows were drawn close over his eyes. "Do you really want me to do this?"

Tony jerked a shoulder. "At the very least, it'll keep you busy when the new baby comes. And, I promise, I'll authorize everything."

Loki scoffed. "Let me think about it, all right? I'm not sure I want to put our lives and the childrens' on display like that."

"I'll leave the decision up to you." With Loki's hand still in his, Tony chucked him under the chin. "Hey, you're cool about going over to the Bartons' place tonight, right?"

Suddenly feeling affectionate, he tugged Tony closer by curling his fingers in his shirt. "Yes, it's fine. It will be nice to help them out for once. Well…at least you and the children can."

"I told you how you can help."

Loki made a soft noise in his throat and Tony made a face at his pout, reaching up to plant his lips to his husband's. Loki was surprised at first, but quickly sunk into the kiss, his craving for Tony's touch being shoved into overdrive. When Tony started to pull back, intending on a brief, sweet lip-lock, Loki took his face between his hands, holding him in place, and kissed him more aggressively. A shocked noise escaped Tony, yet he tightened his arms around Loki anyway, humming into the kiss. Needing to breath, Loki reluctantly broke the kiss.

"Loki…" Tony breathed heavily. "Fuck, I want you so bad…"

"And I you, my love," he managed through his pants. "Soon." He brought their mouths together again, his tongue sliding between Tony's welcoming lips. Their bodies were pressing closer and warming up, the kiss growing more heated, when the sound of something breaking downstairs caused them to pull apart.

_ "Daaad!" _

_ "Pappaaaa!" _

"Gods damn it."

Tony had his forehead pressed to Loki's chest once he lifted his mouth away, and chuckled through his light panting. "Five bucks says it was Jazz."

"You should be ashamed of yourself, betting against your child like that."

Tony laughed again and raised his head. Their eyes met, locked, desire and longing evident in darkened green and nearly-blackened brown. Arguing voices started to rise toward them and something crunched dimly.

"Ten dollars, both boys blame it on Audrey."

_ "You're on." Finalizing it with a smacking kiss, Tony slipped his hand in Loki's, twisted out of his arms and pulled him out of the room. _


	20. Sentimental Fools

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A year after the situation with M, the Starks have moved on, enjoying their new house. And their new baby.

Loki Stark was sleeping peacefully, dreaming that he was walking down a hallway he didn't quite recognize. It wasn't their old house near Malibu. It wasn't Stark Tower in New York. Idly, he wondered where he was, but at the same time, he didn't seem too bothered not knowing. He was wrapped in a soft, fluffy robe as he padded barefoot toward a pair of closed French-style doors. When he reached them, they opened on their own to reveal a large and empty, but fully functioning, Jacuzzi. Behind the bubbling tub, an opened window displayed an ocean-side scene that looked remarkably like the coast of Monte Carlo.

Loki felt his lips curve, his mind recalling all the memories of his time spent in the French getaway, mostly with Anthony. Images of their wedding, their wedding night, and later, a more recent New Year's Eve trip for just the two of them, flitted over his dream self's eyes, projecting softly around him, as things do in dreams. Untying the belt of the robe, Loki was more than a little surprised to find himself already nude. He didn't often wander around in the buff anymore. Perhaps that meant the children weren't around. His dream self froze suddenly, stress making his sleeping form tense under the sheets, as he wondered just where their children were and who was minding them. As quickly as the feeling rose, it ebbed away; somehow, he knew that they were fine and being cared for.

Needing the relaxation the Jacuzzi offered, Loki stepped toward the tub, and seconds later, sunk into the hot water, a long sigh emitting from him as he settled in with the bubbles coming up to his shoulders.

Letting his eyes close, he felt his cheeks and forehead, and the hair at his temples and crown, dampen. He started to reach up to push at his hair, but a weight that wasn't there before prevented his arm from moving. His lips parted, ready to question, but something, or rather some _ one _ , nuzzled at his cheek and throat. He chuckled softly, his mouth curving into a smirk, knowing exactly who it was.

_ Loki… _

"Mm, yes, darling…?" he murmured, his hand searching for Tony's beneath the water's surface.

_ Loki. _

He could all but feel that hot, damp breath fan across his skin; the prickle of his husband's facial hair as he continued to nuzzle; and the thrilling scrape of teeth over the usual sensitive spots. He moved to shift his leg, but found it immobile like his arm. "Anthony…?"

The answer he received was a muffled grunt and then a weight suddenly landed on his stomach, forcing an expulsion of air to leave Loki's lungs as his eyes flew open. He started to question what was going on when Tony's leg tightened around his torso, and he all but crawled over Loki.

"Anthony —"

"Shh!" Rough hands grabbed at his face, soft lips captured his own roughly. "It's still early," Tony muttered in hushed tones, his mouth just hovering over Loki's.

The sound he made was part chuckle, part scoff. "What are you doing —"

"If you have to ask…"

"Anthony, I wanted to sleep m — oh," he gasped as in a span of just a few seconds, the blur of dark, mussed hair above him disappeared beneath the sheets and a hot, damp, needy mouth was wrapped around his half-hard cock. "Oh…gods…"

"Mmm," Tony hummed around him, blunt nails scraping up his torso, then down and removing Loki's shorts, already hanging off his hips, spreading his legs, and pushing at his thighs to bend them back.

Loki's head rolled to the side, lashes fluttering as he pried open his still sleep-heavy eyes to look at the clock on his nightstand. He groaned, in both pleasure and irritation, as the LED display showed a time that told him he could have easily slept another half-hour — at least! — child-free. Hips lifting to meet that eager mouth, Loki reached down, slipping his hand under the sheet, to slide through soft, thick strands. Just as he was finding a good rhythm, a wet slurp sounded, and Tony flung the sheet aside as he rose to his knees, and with the same fervor, flung himself at Loki. Loki’s laugh was muffled as their mouths came together in a hard kiss.

"What…has gotten…into you?" Loki managed to ask the question while Tony busied himself attacking Loki's neck, which he'd kindly stretched, offering more for Tony to bite and lick at. He heard a pop, caught the scent of sour apple, and hissed softly as Tony's lube-slicked fingers wrapped around his length.

_ Where the hell had that come from? _

His hand working Loki to full hardness, Tony sought Loki's lips again, speaking against them. "Dreamt about you. Woke up wanting you. Been too long, baby."

"Mmm…yes." Fully awake and alert now, Loki placed his hands on Tony's chest, framing the reactor, and shoved at him, flipping their positions. Tony let out a laugh when his back hit the mattress.

"Ooh, there's my feisty little kitten."

"Oh, shut it." Loki silenced Tony himself — much to his pleasure — and settled himself over Tony, pressing into him, grinning wickedly. He reached down, hooking his hands in the crooks of Tony's knees, and hitched his legs up high around him.

"Fuck. Hurry," Tony demanded through clenched teeth, shifting until he could feel Loki prodding at his entrance.

"Mm, someone had time to prepare himself, I see," he mused, his tone teasing as he spread Tony's cheeks apart.

"Someone wouldn't wake the fuck up," he growled back, hips twitching up to meet Loki's. Strained whines and low, guttural moans sounded between them as Loki continued to tease Tony. "Loki," he nearly begged.

"Hmm?" His lips remained curved, even as he dipped his head to nip and lick at Tony's throat. "You're sexy when you beg, do you know that?"

"Oh, fuck you!"

"Shh." Loki placed a finger over his parted lips, dodging his snapping teeth with a deep chuckle. "You'll wake the children."

"Mm-mm. C'mon. I'm ready. Fucking do it."

"Well, that's romantic, Anthony," Loki deadpanned, moving his hips so Tony was sliding along his length. He laughed, desperately, reaching up to plant his lips on Loki's.

"Baby…" he drew out the word, his hands gliding up into Loki's silky hair, pulling him down for more kisses. "You know, I love you. But I  _ need _ this.  _ You _ need this. And we need to  _ do _ this before one of the monsters wakes up."

"Anthony…"

"What?"

"Shut up."

With that soft-spoken order, Loki eased himself into his husband, meeting little resistance, until he was fully sheathed inside him. Pushing up onto his fists, Loki waited for Tony to relax around him before he pulled back, almost completely, and slid back in. He did this twice more before his own desires and urges — and Tony's nails digging into his shoulders — had his hips snapping until he was driving himself deeper, harder into Tony.

It had been months since they had been together like this. Even after Loki's leg healed, something always came up, or someone got in the way; a game, a rehearsal, a performance, a play date; and in one case, a broken wrist — "Klutzy Jameson strikes again," Tony had joked at the time. Between the kids needing rides and attention, Tony busy fielding calls and emails with the Realtor helping them find the right house, Loki preparing and planning for the packing and the move itself — all while keeping an eye on Sif, waiting for the end of her pregnancy to come — they simply hadn't had the time. Or energy. Not even in the shower, or the wee hours of the morning or night, like they used to.

As much as their bodies were screaming for the release, neither man was inclined to rush it. Every time Loki felt Tony or himself just teetering on the edge of orgasm, he pulled back, drawing out the sensation until they were both sweaty, writhing messes, panting and gasping for air, sprawled among wrinkled piles of dark linens that were once their nicely made bed.

Until Tony was physically clawing at him, dark red scratches marking his pale back, begging for release, pleading to finally come. Tony was on all fours now, face pressed to the mattress to keep his cries muffled, twisting and crinkling the sheet beneath him in his closed fists. A weakened heap of taut muscle, still he moved his hips, pushing back onto Loki. He tried to rise up to his knees, but Loki was there, all of his weight pressing Tony back down to the bed. A hand slid over his hip, between him and the mattress and took hold of his aching, leaking cock, stroking slower than Tony would have preferred. Tony threw his head back, bumping into Loki's, who was busy dragging his tongue along his spine and nosing up into his hair, as his hand moved lazily, up and down, a twist here, a pinch there.

" _ Mnh _ , Loki."

"Now, Anthony?" he breathed into his ear, making him shiver and goosebumps rise where his breath touched his skin.

"Yes, please. Let me come. Please, baby, let me come." The muscles of his legs trembled until finally giving out, and Tony laid out, sprawled on his belly, as Loki relentlessly fucked into him, holding his hips in a bruising grip. Bottom lip caught between his teeth, Tony struggled to hold back his moans as Loki repeatedly hit his prostate, their sharp movements of their bodies over the sheets causing just the right amount of friction on his cock. Just as his orgasm overtook him, and he was about to shout his release, a hand slid over his mouth, muffling the cries that left him as he emptied himself onto the sheets.

Not a second later, Loki went still behind him, face buried in his neck and shoulder, and grunted as he rode out the waves of his own climax. He remained there for a few moments, softening inside Tony, before he slid out of and away from his lover, rolling onto his back beside him, breathing like he'd just run a marathon.

"Was that…worth the wait…darling?" He questioned through his heavy panting. Finding Tony's limp hand between their sweat-slicked bodies, Loki laced their fingers together. Tony only groaned, gave Loki's fingers a weak squeeze. Loki chuckled and let his heavy eyes close, about ready to let sleep overtake him again.

But someone else had other ideas.

Just as he started to drift off, soft cries came from the monitor on Loki's bedside table, and gradually grew more insistent. Loki brought a hand to his face, rubbed at his eyes. "I'll see to that."

"Th'nks."

Chuckles melting into groans, Loki rolled until he could set his feet on the floor and padded into the bathroom, where he splashed some water on his face and quickly cleaned himself up. He dampened a fresh washcloth and tossed it to Tony as he headed back into the bedroom. It made a wet splat as it landed on his back. Not up to searching for his own shorts and shirt, and rushed by the increasingly stressed cries from the monitor, Loki snatched up Tony's discarded pajama pants and t-shirt from the night before.

"Anthony?" A mumbled grunt came from the boneless lump that was his husband and he yanked the shirt over his head before leaning over Tony's form. "Darling. Can you at least clean yourself up?"

"Mm-hmm…"

"Thank you for leaving your mark all over my back, my love." He said the words against Tony's ear before pressing a kiss to his cheek. Tying the strings on his pants tightly, Loki slipped from their master bedroom, tucked into the corner of the second floor of their new home, passed a storage closet separating their room and the nursery, and paused in the doorway. Audrey had beaten him to the room to tend to the baby, but unable to reach into the crib, she could only stick her hand through the bars to pet at her baby brother.

"Good morning, my sweet girl."

She jolted around, pulling her hands behind her, and smiled sheepishly at him. "Hi,  _ Pappa _ ."

He grinned, stepping in, and patted her cheek when he reached her. "I didn't mean to startle you. Has he been crying long?" he asked as he lifted the fussy baby boy into his arms, pressing his lips to his soft cheek before settling him against his chest. "Hello, baby."

"No," Audrey answered. "But he was kicking his legs a lot." She followed Loki as he carried the baby to the changing table on the other side of the room, patting his bottom.

"Oh, it's a wet diaper, that's all." He laid the baby down, making soothing noises as he unbuttoned his onesie.

Audrey grabbed a clean diaper from the spot Loki kept them in — at a low level, because Audrey often liked to help him — and a bag of wipes, then set them on the changing table by the baby's head. "Here you go." She giggled when her brother's eyes, more hazel than brown now, wandered toward her.

"Thank you, little one," Loki murmured as he pulled chubby little legs from the onesie.

"I'm not the little one anymore,  _ Pappa _ . He is."

Loki chuckled and quickly disposed of the dirty diaper. "That he is. But you are still my sweet girl, yes?" Audrey nodded, and as had become her habit, watched Loki clean the baby and put on a fresh diaper. She was still learning how to do it, and Loki discovered her one day practicing with one of the diapers and a teddy bear. "There we are. All clean." Loki lifted the now quieted baby from the table, nuzzling his cheek, and removing the onesie completely.

"No more pjs?"

"No, darling. Do you want to pick out an outfit for him?"

"Yeah!" Audrey went to the dresser and began to search through the tiny shirts and pants. Loki watched as the baby's eyes followed her then wandered aimlessly around the room, turning toward the door when Jameson poked his head into the room, dark hair spiked at odd angles.

"What's wrong with Dad?" he asked rubbing at one eye. Loki couldn't resist and kissed his baby son's cheek again.

"Good morning to you, too, Jameson."

"Hi," he said softly.

"Got it," Audrey stated as she returned to the changing table. "I like this and these." She placed a navy onesie that read  _ If You Think I'm Cute You Should See My Dads _ and a pair of tiny jeans.

Loki felt a pang of embarrassment at Jameson's question, but showed nothing on his face as he turned his eyes to the baby. "Your father was fine when I left him. Why?" He set the baby down again, picking up the onesie Audrey chose, and undid the buttons. "The jeans are a bit heavy for a warm day, darling. We'll just keep him in this."

"Okay." Audrey took the jeans to return them to the drawer.

Jameson moved further into the room, closer to the changing table, slipping his finger into the baby's tiny hand, and shrugged. "I went to see if you were up so I could tell you my tooth is loose and I heard him, like, making noises like he was in pain. Or he just turned into a zombie. In which case, it's a good thing he didn't know I was in there."

As he got the onesie over the baby's head, Loki's lips curved in a smirk, even as he struggled with a wiggly baby for a moment. "He's fine, love. Probably was just startled by your brother's cries. And stop watching those zombie movies. Your imagination is wild enough." He reached over to cup Jameson's chin, tilting his face up. "Which tooth?"

"Here." Jameson touched a finger to the loosened tooth on the bottom row of his teeth. Loki bent to look closer, holding the baby still, even as he wriggled around, with one hand on his belly.

"Oh, I see! Well, I suppose the Tooth Fairy will be visiting us soon, then." He glanced at Audrey then turned back to the baby. "Are either of you hungry?" Jameson nodded and Audrey said yes, as Loki snapped the buttons closed on the onesie. "What would you like?"

"Pancakes!" Audrey said.

"French toast," Jameson suggested, before sticking his tongue out at the baby, and dodging his grabby hand.

"That sounds better. I want french toast instead."

Loki smiled at Audrey. "All right. Jameson, go ahead and get everything out. The bread, the eggs, the milk. And wash your hands, both of you."

"'Kay. Come on, Audi."

"Is your brother awake?"

"Don't know!" He answered as he started out, Audrey following behind him, pushing past him. "Hey!"

"Last one downstairs is a rotten egg!"

" _ Hei! _ Don't run in the house!" Loki sighed and stood the baby on his feet. "Why do I bother, little one? They don't listen to me. But you will, won't you, my precious?" His answer was a giggle accompanied by spit bubbles and a crooked smile. Loki immediately melted because the smile was so much of Tony. "Oh, you cute little bugger. Let's go get your father." Settling the baby on his hip, Loki returned to their bedroom where he found Tony, lying on his back now, eyes closed, and still groaning softly. He moved quietly to the bed, and shifted the baby, holding him over Tony, biting his lip as the baby kicked out a foot and just brushed Tony's torso.

"Babe, is that you?" he asked through a mumble. Loki stifled his laughter when the baby slapped a saliva-covered hand to Tony's chest and babbled incoherently. "What the —" Tony opened his eyes and lifted his head, his face softening when he saw the newest member of the family giggling over him. "Hey…" When he started to rise up, Loki lifted the baby away and waited for Tony to sit up against the headboard. "Gimme." Tony wriggled his fingers and Loki placed the baby in his arms before sitting beside his outstretched legs "Hey, Squirt." Tony brought him close and pressed a loud kiss to his cheek.

Loki grinned, amused by his husband's chosen nickname for their youngest. "What were you doing in here? Jameson came in and thought you were in pain."

Tony was busy making faces at and blowing raspberries on the baby's neck and face, but paused long enough to throw a smirk Loki's way. "I  _ was _ in pain. You practically broke me, babe."

Loki only grinned back, fluttering black lashes playfully. "You asked for it."

Tony eyed him, even as he dodged a tiny fist. "Told you. Had a good dream. Then it became a better reality." He bobbed his brows for an added affect, only making Loki roll his eyes.

"Not in front of the boy, darling. Would you like some french toast?"

"You makin' it?" Grabbing the baby by his sides, Tony began to lift him, like a human barbell.

"Unless you've hired a chef recently…"

Tony snickered and muttered under his breath, "Smart ass. Three slices, please. Extra powdered sugar."

Loki shot him an exasperated look and reached out to run his hand over the baby's soft, dark hair. "Your sugar intake rivals that of Jameson's, do you know that?"

"Yup." Ignoring Loki's next stern expression, Tony tossed the baby up a little, successfully turning his husband's focus to him.

"Anthony." Loki held out his hands under the baby, ready to catch him.

"What? Relax. I'm not gonna drop him." At that moment, the baby's arms flailed and he cried briefly, and Tony cuddled him to his chest. "Oops. It's okay, baby."

Loki clucked his tongue and took him back even as he clutched onto Tony's shirt. "It's all right, darling. I think he's just hungry," he said sitting the baby on Tony's legs.

"Well?" When Loki glanced up, Tony motioned to his chest. "Whip it out. Give him a taste."

Despite himself, Loki snickered and looked down at the baby. "Daddy thinks he's funny, doesn't he, Axel?" Loki kissed the baby’s fingers when he reached up to touch him.

"Hey." Tony nudged him with his foot. "I'm hilarious. And you love me for it."

"Yes. Seems I love you enough to let you name my son after a figure skating jump." He made a face at Axel, who simply giggled.

Tony scoffed, throwing up his hands. "Babe, I told you; it's not after a figure skating jump. It's symbolic. You got the Shakespeare kid, I got my car kid, and we got the mixed one," he explained. "Axel represents my favorite genre of music.

Enjoying Tony's frustration, Loki cocked a brow, grinning sweetly. "Axel is not a genre of music, my love."

"The name represents it!"

At his shout, Axel jolted and started crying, turning his face into Loki's chest. He chuckled and lifted him to hold him against his chest, rubbing a soothing hand over his back. "Oh, now, now, darling. It's all right. Daddy didn't mean to frighten you. Did you…?"

"No. Sorry, Squirt." Tony shuffled around the bed, moving behind Loki to make faces at Axel, holding the sheet at his waist to cover himself.

"Hey,  _ Pap  _ — oh, god, Dad!" Sebastian jerked to a stop in the doorway, shielding his eyes. "Nobody wants to see that!"

"What? Me making your brother laugh?" Tony replied, not looking at Sebastian. Loki glanced down at his body.

"I believe he's referring to your bare ass, darling." Rolling his eyes, Tony shoved the sheet around him to cover himself. "I don't mind seeing it."

"Eww!" They both turned to look at Sebastian with matching grins. "When did I get old enough to hear  _ that? _ "

"You've been hearing it since you were four, kiddo," Tony pointed out, blowing a raspberry at Axel, who had stopped crying and returned to his giggling self, pawing at Tony's face.

"Okay, yeah, but do you have to corrupt my baby brother, too?"

"Zip it, Bash."

Sebastian crossed his arms, making a displeased face that only made him look more like Loki. "Fine. But then I won't get to tell you that your kids are making a mess in the kitchen."

"What? Damn it." Loki handed Axel off to Tony and rose from the bed. "I should get down there."

"Don't worry." Loki paused by the bed, lifting a brow in question at Sebastian, as Tony laid Axel down, keeping a hand on his belly. "I took care of it already. I just came to ask if you were eating, too. So I can get started and calm those two down."

For a moment, Loki just stared, surprised. But knowing Sebastian would be irritated if he made a fuss, he just nodded. "I'll have two slices, please."

"Three, extra pow —"

"Powdered sugar. Yeah, I know," the teen mumbled as he turned around to leave. "I hope you plan to put pants on, Dad."

"If you insist!" he called after him. He chuckled to himself and looked up at Loki. "What's with him?"

A small sense of pride filled Loki's chest, and he lowered to the bed again. "Nothing. He's trying to step up and do more things on his own." Ignoring the feeling that his son was slowly not needing him anymore, Loki looked to Axel, brushing a finger down his cheek. "He's just declaring his independence, that's all."

Axel cooed, eyes darting between his fathers, and a rougher, more calloused hand covered Loki's by his cheek, pulling it away. "You know, when they're all grown up and out of the house and on their own…" His chest constricting slightly at the thought, Loki turned his glistening eyes up to Tony's, leaning into his hand when he cupped his cheek. " _ I'm _   still gonna need you."

There was a twinge of embarrassment, a hint of color to Loki's cheeks. He was so transparent at times. He covered Tony's hand, pressed his lips to his palm, and lowered them both to the bed. "Good. You'll need it the most."

Tony snorted and surged forward to plant his mouth on Loki's, even as Loki laughed against his lips. "You shit," he muttered between kisses.

Laughing more, Loki pushed him back. "Go, get dressed. Your children are waiting."

"You took my pants."

"You have a dozen more pairs in your closet, Anthony."

He leaned forward, nuzzling at Loki's neck. "I like the ones that you've been in." Loki snickered because Tony didn't even bother to whisper the sentiment.

"Behave yourself, husband. Your son is watching." Still nestled in Loki's neck and hair, Tony turned his head to see a pair of dark hazel eyes on him and Loki. A toothless grin followed.

"You little pervert." He tapped a finger to Axel's chin.

"Just like his father." Loki mimicked the move to Tony's chin.

"Oh, ha-ha." He laid a smacking kiss to Loki's cheek then jumped up, tossing the sheet aside — and it landed on Axel's face. He squealed and Loki pulled it away to find him laughing, until he saw Tony had gone. To distract him, Loki bent over the baby, smiling, and let tiny hands and fingers grab at his face and hair.

Like his brother before him, Axel Edward Stark had arrived earlier than expected. Fortunately, he hadn't had any health issues, as Jameson had. He was perfectly healthy, and even a little bigger than Jameson had been. Happily, both Tony and Loki felt as if their family was now complete. They had moved into the new house — this one also not far from the Bartons' new home — not a week before Axel's arrival. While Tony and Loki were coaching Sif through the birth, Natasha and Clint were rushing to set up the nursery.

Nearly a year had passed since the incident at the Beverly Hills Hotel. And they had all put it behind them — at least, Loki hoped. Sebastian's nightmares had once again gradually disappeared on their own. And it was just a few months ago that he decided, on his own, to stop seeing his psychologist. He was back to his old self again — with the occasional minor teenage outbursts here and there — but, much to Loki and Tony's surprise, he had taken up a more responsible role in the house with Axel's arrival. He helped with the baby when needed, offered to babysit his two younger siblings, and even helped Loki with preparing dinner for the family of six.

On the business front, Stark Industries was thriving once again. The threat from a takeover long gone, Tony and Pepper were preparing for another Stark Expo to be held near the end of the third quarter in it's usual spot in Flushing, New York. Though, with a new baby in the house, Tony was distracted and sleep-deprived, so Pepper was doing the majority of the planning.

Tony had changed, Loki noticed. Understandably. They all had. He was more attentive to the kids; as attentive as a man whose mind worked light speeds ahead of everyone else’s could be. But it was a vast improvement. He still drove Bash to school every day. He finally gave in and welcomed the conversation to discuss Jazz skipping a grade. And, he was working hard not to spoil Audi, or give in to her whims so easily.

And he was completely smitten with Axel.

The youngest, newest Stark was only five months old, but already they could see his personality emerging. He was a giggly, happy baby, who smiled and laughed more than the others had. And he was, surprisingly, already very attached to Tony — who never let a chance to rub that in Loki's face pass by, since Sebastian, Jameson, and Audrey had been more attached to Loki in their first year. As for the stay-at-home dad himself, after several long discussions with everyone from Tony and Sif, to Natasha and Thor, and even with each of the children, the one-time creative writing professor had decided to author a memoir.

The risk of scrutiny and unwanted attention it would bring to the family was heavily taken into consideration. Tony promised to do his best to wield his influence with the media; and Loki made the choice early on to focus on himself and his life as a senator's adopted son, before one Tony Stark entered his life. He would save his life with Tony for another memoir, depending on how the first one did. And he would take his time with it. At this point, he had only drafted an outline and began mapping out the major points of his childhood and his time in Swiss boarding schools. Reminded of his time in the orphanage and those first rough years with Odin, Loki was much more appreciative of Tony and the kind of father he was.

It was still difficult for him to accept that Sebastian was increasingly becoming his own person. Having an infant and two younger children to focus on — and now a book — made it that much easier to not dwell on his melancholy feelings. All in all, Loki couldn't complain about his life at the moment. Which, for a person used to always having something to complain about, was only slightly annoying.

Axel began to fuss again, and shouts and laughter from downstairs pulled Loki from his thoughts. He grinned, relishing the sound of his older children getting along — for the moment — and lifted the baby into his arms. Rising, he moved around the bed to find his slippers.

"All right, Gorgeous," Tony called, stepping out from their new bigger, walk-in closet, dressed in sweatpants and a black tank, and joined Loki as he moved near the foot of the bed. He handed Axel over to Tony when he clapped and started leaning toward him. "Ready to head down?" Loki nodded, smiling softly when Axel gnawed at Tony's bearded cheek with his toothless gums. "Hey, knock that off, you little weirdo," he laughed, dodging Axel's toothless gums. He looked up at Loki and his laughter faded. "What's wrong?"

A startled look crossed Loki's face. "Nothing."

"Babe…" he drew out the word, adjusting Axel in his arms. "You got that look on your face."

"What look?"

"That  _ thinking _ look. Why are you thinking? It's Sunday. It's universally known to be a lazy day. What are you thinking?"

"I'm not…" Loki laughed then huffed softly. "I don't want to tell you now. You'll just think I'm being silly. And overly sentimental."

"Oh, man," Tony groaned. "Are you about to get all mushy on me?"

Loki's face hardened. "Not now." He started to move to walk away, but Tony managed to slip an arm around his waist and snag him back. "Anthony."

"No, no. Tell me what you were gonna say. I want to know."

"No," he pouted. "You will only ridicule me. And I feel silly enough as it is."

"Loki. Stop being a baby. Axel's got it covered." He dipped the baby toward Loki making him laugh, and Loki's lips twitched.

"I was only going to say…that…" He lifted his eyes to meet Tony's, leaning into him. "I love you. And there isn't anything in this world that I would trade for the life I've had with you."

Concern filled Tony’s eyes for the briefest of seconds. "Jeez, babe," he muttered, shifting uncomfortably. "You make it sound like we don't have the rest of our lives to be together."

Loki raised a hand to Axel's soft dark hair, curling slightly as Audrey's had when she was that small, and grinned when he turned his dark hazel eyes to him. "We do. I only want you to know how much I love and appreciate you. I know I'm not the easiest to love at times…"

Tony sighed, humming softly, and dipped his head back. "Okay, now you're just dragging me into this."

Loki started to pull back, but Tony simply tightened his arm around him. "I didn't…"

"Shut it. Look. Loki…if anyone should be grateful it's me." Already feeling the emotion welling up in his chest, Tony couldn't look into Loki’s eyes, choosing instead to keep his gaze on Axel.

"Anthony…"

"No, it's true. If you hadn't come back into my life when you did…hell, I'd probably be dead by now." His eyes flicked up to Loki’s, a shoulder shrugged at the horrified look on his husband's face. "You gave me two damn good reasons to change."

Loki frowned, confused. "Two…?"

"Yeah. Being a father to Bash. And…mostly, being with you."

Loki inhaled sharply, breathing it out shakily as he leaned his head to Tony's, murmuring, " _ Min søte kjærlighet _ ."

"I should be thanking you. For these little monsters that I can't…" he paused to clear his throat. "I can't live without," he finished with a weaker voice than he expected. "And for you putting up with me and my mistakes and errors of judgment."

"We both make them," Loki said softly, but firmly before pressing his lips to Tony's temple.

"Yours don't cost us millions of dollars and threaten our lives."

"Anthony." It was a soft, affectionate reprimand. He breathed in to speak but Tony beat him to it.

"Anyway," he said in a firmer voice now, cutting off whatever Loki was about to say. Tony shifted again, making sure not to squish Axel between them, and finally met Loki's gaze. "I might be a billionaire, babe, but none of it would be worth a penny it if I didn't have you and the monsters."

Loki grinned through his eyes filling and brushed his fingers over Tony's cheek. "Sentimental fools, the both of us," he managed through his constricted throat.

"And I should also thank you for something else."

"What's that?"

"This morning." Loki scoffed and gave him a half-hearted shove. Tony laughed, glad the emotional moment was over, keeping his arm around Loki, and bobbed his eyebrows. He cried out in pain when Axel's tiny fingers grabbed at one. "Oh, you little…damn that hurt."

"That's what you get for spoiling that beautiful moment by being so crude," Loki said with a smirk.

"Whatever. You love me crude, and you know it, kitten."

Loki groaned and slipped out of Tony's arms, heading for the stairs. "Ugh! There's that name again."

"What?" Tony laughed as he followed, coming down the stairs faster than Loki would have liked with the baby, had he seen. "You love that name."

" _ You _ love that name.  _ I _ want to claw your eyes out when you call me that," he playfully growled, turning for the kitchen.

Tony laughed, jostling Axel in his arms. "Hear that, Squirt? He wants to claw my eyes out. Just like the feisty little kitten he is."

Loki laughed, tickled. "Be quiet, you fool."

"Spoken like a true lover," he quipped with his trademark grin.

"You  _ are _ my true love," Loki pointed out as he turned to face his husband, and pressed a hard kiss to his mouth.

A chorus of  _ ewws _ echoed behind them, and they pulled apart.

"Jeez. Think you guys can keep your hands off each other long enough to let us eat breakfast without throwing up?" Sebastian stomped over and took Axel from Tony's arms, carrying him to his high chair at the table. "You guys are gross."

Still laughing, and taking each other's hand, the couple moved into the kitchen to enjoy breakfast with their family.


	21. Epilogue: Picture Perfect

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fifteen years later…

Anastasia Barton always got what she wanted. And for as long as she could remember she wanted Sebastian Daniel Stark. Having known each other all their lives, thanks to their parents' close friendship, there was never a time Ana didn't know that one day she would be carrying the Stark name. Her parents and his parents had jokingly dismissed what she felt as puppy love, assuming when they grew up they would grow apart or that they would each find someone else. But Ana's will never wavered. Considering her parents had been together for almost four decades, and Sebastian's fathers an equally long time, she didn't understand how none of them could grasp her want to have a long-lasting relationship. It was all she knew.

Of course, it wasn't the perfect fairytale she had always imagined. They hadn't spent their childhood and adolescence inseparable. He hadn't asked her to run away with him when they were eighteen to start the adventure she knew their life together would be. She wasn't even his first real kiss; though he had been hers — even if she lied about it being 'practice.' No, instead, Ana had to first suffer through being in different schools, and when she had finally caught up with him, she was forced to listen to girls and boys, of all grades, fawn over her own personal green-eyed Adonis.

_ Hers. _

Ironically, she had been the envy of them all. Even if she wasn't his girlfriend — yet — she was his closest confidant and best friend. Sebastian never took the attention, the looks, the whispering, and the soft giggles from the girls and wolf whistles from the boys, all that well. He found it confusing and overwhelming, he had once told her. And he wished, out loud, that if someone had liked him that they would just be brave enough to come to him and say so.

So Ana prepared to do just that.

But again, things hadn't gone the way she expected — at least, not then. Someone else had beat her to it, and Ana had to suffer — as did the entire Barton household — for four whole months as Sebastian experienced his first relationship with his first girlfriend, at fifteen. Ana remembered Uncle Tony had liked the girl, but Uncle Loki thought she was a little too fast for his eldest boy. Mama repeatedly told her it wouldn't last; it was just a high school thing. And Daddy said she was a small-time fizz compared to his little firecracker.

Unfortunately, it wasn't the only setback Ana would have to face in her quest to claim Sebastian.

After the first girlfriend, there was the short time Sebastian had with a foreign exchange student in his junior year. Being the sole student in school who could speak Norwegian, and well, it became Sebastian's responsibility to acclimate Magnus to the Southern California way of life and be his translator through his high school classes. It wasn't long before the boys were spending more time away from Ana, alone. It didn't anger her — much. She had known from a young age that Sebastian found the odd boy attractive and had minor crushes. Considering how open-minded his fathers and mothers were, and the way his birth parents alone had bounced between sexes, it wasn't a surprise. But it stung.

After Magnus had returned to Norway, leaving Sebastian with a minor broken heart, Sebastian spent his senior year focusing on his studies. He’d remained single for the year — not for a lack of trying on his fellow students' parts — but he also found his new love. And what would eventually become Ana's greatest competition.

Having taken an art class as a random elective in his freshman year, after the drama classes were deemed too full, Sebastian discovered he had a hidden talent. Hidden to him, but Ana could recall Aunt Sif and Uncle Loki pointing out to their son that they themselves were artistic in their own right — her with food, he with words. It made sense, then, that their offspring would inherit some of that artistic ability as well. And since Audrey, who was presently in her third year in college, had, like her big brother, found her niche in theatre — with a not so minor talent for graphic design, as well — it showed that it truly could be in the genes.

Through the art classes Sebastian discovered he was good with pencils and charcoal and sketching; canvas painting was simple enough, though, much too time consuming for the impatient, burgeoning artist in Sebastian. But, in his senior year, when he tried sculpting for the first time, he fell hard and fast. And when he found he could sculpt with more than just clay, he began to experiment with wood, wax, and eventually started raiding his father's workshop for scrap metal. Occasionally, Sebastian could be found working in the garage side-by-side with Tony, both of them wielding a torch.

The next obstacle Ana's fairy tale faced was college. Sebastian decided he wanted to go to a school where his focus would be on art. Clear across the country. And Ana had seemed to be the only one against the idea. Both his fathers and mother, and his step-mother, supported his decision, so Ana suffered in silence, relying on Skype calls and text messages, and awaiting every holiday he would come home during the four years that Sebastian spent in Rhode Island — and the following two years when he lived and studied in France in a special arts program.

She hadn't spent all her time pining away for the love of her life, however. As determined as she was to win Sebastian, Ana was equally determined to have success of her own. Following in her mother's footsteps, Ana decided early on to study law and planned to apply to law schools near wherever Sebastian might be. Natasha was heartbroken Ana opted not to attend USC, but the highly intelligent, and sharp-minded — like her mother — Ana still excelled in the state college she'd chosen. Though, she had discovered early on that law wasn't as interesting to her as she had expected it would be. It took nearly three years of pre-law classes before she got the nerve to change her major. Various history courses, and classes to improve her Russian, sparked an interest in Russian history for her. It became something of a passion for Ana — a secondary one to Sebastian, but a passion nonetheless.

It was a passion that had her working as an assistant in the Russian studies department through the rest of her time in college, and fielding offers to study and teach overseas before she even graduated. But even as more academic success came her way through graduate school, and with a string of half-hearted romances trailing behind her, Ana always held hope she and Sebastian would somehow cross paths again.

After he returned from Paris, Sebastian settled in New York, where interest in his sculptures had started to simmer — and where a flourishing student just happened to be attending graduate school and working part-time as an interpreter. The lifelong best friends had no problem picking up where they left off, each blending in seamlessly with the other's collective group of friends.

But Ana wasn't satisfied just being friends. And she noticed that things hadn't changed much since high school, with both males and females expressing interest in Sebastian. Only now Sebastian wasn't so shy or hesitant to act on mutual feelings. It was disheartening, and had Ana second-guessing her feelings for the first time in her life, and her relentless pursuit of her closest friend.

In the end, though, her persistence would pay off.

All it took was a bottle of cheap vodka and a game of Truth or Dare while they sat on the rooftop of Bash's apartment building, on a sultry summer night. Bash was hesitant to participate at first. Like his father, Loki, Sebastian did not hold his liquor well. A fact of which Ana had been well aware.

It started innocently enough, with each of them doling out silly and juvenile dares of flashing and mooning neighbors and crank-calling friends and strangers, alike. But after a few shots, giggles fits were running rampant and inhibitions were steadily fading away.

There was very little the two hadn't known about each other — or so they thought. Through a couple rounds of Truth questions, Ana learned of the serious French boyfriend Bash had kept secret from everyone — even his fathers — for nearly a year. Bash, in turn, learned of Ana's brief dalliance with drugs in her second and third years of college. Something, she was able to admit later, that was a result of her unhappiness with studying law.

Ana's growing frustration with Bash's resistance to view her as more than his closest friend, or the little girl he had grown up with, only built with his inebriated complaints of being unable to find that one great love of his life, and his longing to have a close relationship like his fathers'. When he had collapsed beside her, stretching out on the pile of blankets they had laid out, and dropped his head in her lap before drunkenly mumbling that he wished she still saw him in that light, Ana had burst out laughing. Likely influenced by the liquor, she had calmed herself long enough to ask him, seriously, "In what light?" and waited for his answer as she brushed his jet black hair, long and near his shoulders at that time, back from his forehead.

Long-legged and slim, Bash had turned those soft, but intense green eyes up to her, raising a hand to flick at a burgundy curl hanging over her face, dangling over his, and grinned lazily. "You know," was all he had said.

"Tell me anyway," she'd murmured, lightly tracing his sharply defined cheekbone with the pad of her finger. He'd laughed again, the kind of tickled laugh only those who'd been drinking could emit.

"C'mon, Ana Banana. You know…like when we were kids."

She had to bite back another laugh, a nervous breathy one. Needing something to distract her just one second, Ana had reached for the bottle of vodka, foregoing the shot glass, and swallowed down several gulps. "And what makes you so sure I don't?"

Another little giggle from the man in her lap escaped, and when he'd reached up this time, it was to press the backs of his cool fingers to her cheek, an affectionate gesture he'd learned from his father. "'Cause I'm not that lucky,  _ kjæreste _ ."

Ana's lips had twitched up as she smirked the smirk of her mother, an auburn brow cocking with it. A calm façade that effectively hid the chaos she felt inside, came over her as she had coolly stated, "You  _ could _ be."

She'd hoped then, as their eyes locked, that she'd get that kiss she had been waiting for. But, with Bash being one of the few Stark men who didn't always act so impulsively — at least, not as an adult — the two had ended up sitting on that rooftop throughout the night, nervously confessing their feelings, awkwardly discussing where they would go from there. It was about the time the sun had started to lighten the sky, and the city started to awaken, that the lifelong best friends finally had shared their first kiss since they were teenagers.

After he had fallen asleep in her arms, Ana had watched Bash, watched his chest rise and fall steadily, brushed the tips of her fingers over his chiseled cheekbones and strong jaw, and eventually, she had closed her eyes, with a satisfied smile curving her lips.

Because Anastasia Barton  _ always _ got what she wanted.

* * *

Ana and Bash's smiles were bright and brilliant for the camera as they posed with their hands around the silver knife, ready to cut into the specially designed cake. It was shaped in a replica of one of Bash's works, of a couple embracing — a gift from the owner of the gallery that regularly showed Bash's work. And Ana's cheeks were beginning to ache, along with her feet and her back. Finally, they were able to cut a good-sized slice, taking pieces from the marble cake to feed each other. Ana let out a short squeal when Bash swiped a dollop of frosting over her nose. Laughing, Bash took her chin in his hand, bringing her closer, and flicked his tongue out, licking up the frosting.

"Hey! Keep it in the bedroom! There are children present."

"Zip it, Dad…" Bash groaned, but grinned at his father. He watched, with a small smile, as Loki reprimanded Tony simply by saying his name, and Tony responded by reaching up to press a kiss to Loki's lips that Bash could hear from his spot, several feet away. Absently, Bash reached down for Ana's hand.

Ana turned away from her teenaged sister, Charlie, as Bash's fingers closed around hers. She looked up then followed his gaze to where his fathers stood, smiling and looking at each other like the lovebirds they still were. She gave Bash's hand a squeeze, set her chin on his shoulder, a habit that started when she'd grown tall enough to do so. "After all these years, they're still crazy about each other, aren't they?"

"They have to be," Bash scoffed, leaning into her. "Like there's anyone else who could ever put up with either one of them?"

She chuckled and poked him in the side. "I think some of the people in this room might say the same about you and me."

Bash turned his head a fraction, setting that deep, penetrating gaze on her. Even after twenty-seven years, her stomach still did a flip. He leaned forward to press a kiss to her temple. "Good."

She cocked an auburn brow. "Why 'good?'"

"Because you're mine," he said simply.

Ana’s red-stained lips quirked up in a smirk. "Took you long enough to figure that out, дурак." He didn't smile or grin, but Bash’s eyes danced with mischief, and he mouthed once more  _ Mine _ . "Right back at ya, baby."

"All right, newlyweds, move it." Natasha gave Ana a light shove as she moved behind the table, cutting in front of most of the people to pick up two plates of cake. "They're trying to serve some cake here. Move it along."

Bash slipped his arm around Ana's waist, still wondering why she would voluntarily put herself in a such a binding dress, and moved with her away from the cake table. They stood together, watching as Natasha carried the plates to the table assigned to their parents, and dropped down next to Clint, sliding the plate in front of him. Ana's youngest sibling, Charlie, immediately ran over and sweet-talked her way into stealing half of her father's slice. Stick-straight blonde strands swishing, Charlie wandered away, bolting over to Matt, Bash's Uncle Thor's oldest son, bouncing his first-born, a boy, in his arms, and started chatting with his pretty wife.

Another flutter in her belly had Ana turning to wrap both arms around her new husband. "Bash."

"Hmm?" he hummed absently. His eyes roamed around the room, over her head, stopping, lips curving as he spotted Jazz, talking closely with their 'Uncle' Steve's youngest daughter. "Oh, shit. Look at Jazzy, babe. He's trying to hit on Ava. Gods, he's still totally a spaz."

Ana shot a quick glance over her shoulder at the scene, before giving Bash's waist a small shake. " _ Sebastian _ ."  _ That got your attention _ , she thought, as his eyes darted to her. She rarely called him by his full name — only when she was upset or exasperated by him. Or, as in this moment, trying to get his attention.

"What,  _ Anastasia? _ "

She looked at him quietly for a moment, discreetly swallowed. "When are we going to tell them?" she asked softly.

Bash’s tense stance relaxed instantly and he looked up again, searching for his fathers and Ana's parents. The four sat at the same table, Tony now happily eating cake from the fork Loki offered, his worker's fingers, as ever, absentmindedly twirling in Loki's still mostly raven strands, pulled back today in a slick tail at the nape of his neck. Clint and Natasha sat beside them, discreetly making fun of them. "Worry about it later,  _ min vakre Russisk rose _ ," he finally answered, bringing his hands to her face. "Let's just enjoy today."

As she always had when he spoke Norwegian to her, Ana melted into him.  _ My beautiful Russian rose _ . That was what he'd started to call her after he finally admitted how he felt about her. And he knew exactly when to pull that endearment out, to calm her down, to extinguish her easily flared temper. Or simply to soften her to where he wanted her. The sneaky little shit.

"It's  _ our _ day. Just...let's just focus on us."

Ana grinned softly as Bash’s thumb brushed across her full bottom lip. "We have to tell them soon."

The way he angled his head, in mild irritation, made her chuckle. "Why? You know what's gonna happen. They're gonna get all crazy and start planning everything.  _ Again _ . Don't you remember how crazy they drove us planning  _ this _ ?" Bash lowered his forehead to hers, his fingers curling into her red curls, loose and flowing down her back, as she always did when she wasn’t working over a textbook. Golden red silk against the white satin of her dress. "Are you honestly ready for all of that to start again so soon?"

She laughed, hard enough to throw her head back. Bash straightened and tightened his arms around her as she gripped his lapel. "Fine. We can wait. But...we can't wait too long."

"Why not?" He nearly whined the question, dropping his hands to her hips, and started to sway lightly with her.

"Bash." She looked around discreetly and leaned in to whisper, "I'm almost twenty weeks already. I'm going to start showing probably soon. I had four people trying to get me into this thing." She flicked her fingers at the full skirt of her dress. "I told them I'd been stress eating. For a week."

His lips twitched up, his hands gave her hips a light squeeze, his thumbs running up and down her flattened belly. "I know, hon. We'll tell them after the honeymoon or something. I'm looking forward to that little belly you're gonna have." He had to suppress a bigger grin when Ana predictably groaned miserably. She rolled her eyes, letting her hands slide over his chest and down his arms to grip at his elbows.

"Why? I'm not. I am not looking forward to being all fat and pudgy. You're probably just looking forward to my gigantic boobs."

Bash laughed, deeply, and tugged her closer to kiss her cheek. No one could see him brush his thumbs along the underside of her breasts between them. "I hate to be the one to tell you this, baby, but your boobs are already gigantic."

She snickered, hunched her shoulders, and moved his hands away. "Shut up."

"But that isn't what I was meant,  _ kjæreste _ ." Before Ana could ask what he meant, Bash took her face in his hands again, his artist's fingers light and gentle as he tipped up her face. "I can't wait to see you all round and perfect, with the life we created together blossoming inside you."

Fingers winding around his wrists, Ana sighed, whimpering softly with it. "I didn't realize I'd married such a sap. You should have been a writer."

He smirked and kissed her lips softly, sliding his hands down to link with hers. "Pop's the one who's magic with words. I'm better with metal."

She smiled widely. "Just like your dad."

Bash laughed and pursed his lips. "Hey, there's a lot of Loki in me, I'd hope."

This time she cupped his face. "There is. You've got the best of them both. Now. Come on. Your knocked up wife wants more cake. And a lot of it."

* * *

"Jameson Anthony Stark, put that flask away. You know very well there is no alcohol allowed."

Jazz flashed bright brown eyes at Loki, smirking, and looking so much like his father it made Loki ache for his and Tony's college days. "I don't know what you're talking about, Pop," he nearly crooned, sliding the silver flask back into his vest pocket. "I promise, it's just Coke."

"Charmer." Loki nudged him with his elbow, his hands occupied with two flutes of sparkling cider. "You forget, I can always tell when you're lying. My bullshit radar is pinging madly around you. Just like your father."

"Yeah, yeah…love you, too."

Chuckling, Loki carried the cider back to the table where Natasha now sat alone. "Hello, darling..."

"Hi, honey bunch." She batted long dark auburn lashes at him as he took the seat beside her and handed her a flute. "Thanks."

"Where has Clint gone?"

"To get more cake probably. Charlie ate most of his. Mm!" She sipped at the sweet beverage, her lips smacking as she swallowed it down. "It ain't vodka, but it's pretty damn good."

Loki sat back, crossing one long leg over the other, and drank some of his own. "You and Sif did a wonderful job with the planning."

"I know." Loki chuckled. "Who knew, right? I didn't even put that much thought into my own wedding."

"Perhaps it's different when it's your child." He caught sight of Sebastian and Anastasia speaking with a group of his art friends. "Gods. I cannot believe I am the father of a married man. A man who's almost thirty. Where did the time go? When did my precocious little boy become this successful artist?"

Natasha rolled her eyes, lazily slapped a hand to Loki's thigh. He flinched only slightly at the dull ache from a long ago injury. "Face it, Loki. We are old bitches. My little brat bullied your kid all the way to the altar, just like we said she would." They fell into a fit of giggles together. "And now we're stuck with each other, for  _ real _ , for the rest of our lives."

Loki raised a hand to Natasha's hair, dyed monthly to keep that rich auburn tint, he knew, but she would never admit, smoothing a hand over the practical short cap, then rubbed his hand over her back. "I wouldn't have wanted it to be anyone else, darling." He curled a finger under her chin, turning her face up to his. "You will always be the girl who hated poetry, but loved me enough to always tell me the truth."

She met his gaze, a silent conversation being exchanged. When her eyes began to tear up, Natasha turned away, bringing the cider to her mouth. "You did well, too." Her voice was a little shakier than she'd like, but, of course, she ignored it. "With the tuxes." She chanced a glance back at Loki, her best friend of thirty-five years, flicked a finger at his royal blue and Byzantium striped tie.

Loki grinned. "I'm lucky you and Sif let me do anything at all." His eyes lifted as Clint returned, with Tony not far behind.

"Want some more, babe?"

"Mm-mm," Natasha grunted, shaking her head as she finished off her drink.

"What the fuck is with this no bar at the wedding shit?" Tony griped as he plopped down next to Loki, pulling his own flask from his inside jacket pocket.

"Language, Anthony." Loki leaned forward to set his glass down, doing a double take when he saw the flask. "Are you serious? You have one too?"

"Oh, please." Tony unscrewed the cap and took a quick swig. "Don't act like you're surprised, babe. Besides, it was a gift to all the boys in the wedding party from the fathers of the groom."

"Oh, really?" Loki only grinned and shook his head. "I'd be a fool if I was surprised." He laid a hand on Tony's arm, giving it a light squeeze, glancing up when he saw their youngest, Axel, come running toward their table.

"Can I get the keys to the car?" He held out his hand between the two, shrugged when Loki asked why. "I left my iPod in my jacket and I left my jacket in the car and I wanna show Charlie something. Can I get 'em?"

"Why the hell would you leave your iPod in the car?" Tony questioned, turning to look up at Axel.

"Anthony…"

"You're the one who told me not to take it into the wedding ceremony!" Axel argued.

"We're not at the ceremony right now, are we?"

"Stop," Loki nearly shouted through a chuckle, throwing out his arm between father and son. "First of all, why don't you try saying please?" Axel responded by rolling his eyes. "Do you want the keys or not?" he asked shortly.

"Can I  _ please _ get the keys?"

"Thank you." Loki gave a nod to Tony, who reached into his pocket and handed over the keys to Axel.

" _ Don't _ turn the car on," he called after Axel as he ran off to join Charlie. "I mean it, Axel. If I ask Jarvis and he says that car has been moved I'm gonna smack you so hard, your grandkids will feel it!" Slightly embarrassed, Loki shushed Tony, taking his hand to keep him from pointing.

"What's that all about?" Natasha asked, nosy as ever.

Loki sighed and laughed. "Axel took the car out for a joyride a few nights ago."

"No shit?" Clint asked through laughter.

"Fortunately, he didn't cause any damage, but he damn near gave us heart attacks when we found the car missing. Anthony's had to put Jarvis on alert. If anyone aside from he or I are behind the wheel, he locks the driver out."

"Fuckin' fourteen year old little smart-ass," Tony mumbled before sipping from his flask again. Loki reached under the seat of Tony's chair and dragged it closer, leaning in so his mouth was near Tony’s ear.

"Should I remind you what you did with a car at fourteen?" he murmured against the shell before pressing his lips to his bearded cheek. To soften him up even more, Loki brushed his fingers through his hair. It still bothered him that Tony's hair seemed to refuse to gray completely and was mostly the same salt and pepper mix it was over a decade ago. Tony turned his head enough to encourage Loki to nuzzle.

"Why do you think I'm so pissed, babe?" he whispered back. "I'm worried, okay?"

"He's fine, my love. He has  _ you _ for a father, not Howard. And he will think twice before getting behind a steering wheel before he is legally allowed. Lest he incur your wrath again. Come now. It's your son's wedding day. Smile." He dipped his head to force himself into Tony's vision. Tony jokingly stretched his lips over his teeth and Loki nuzzled him again.

"Knock it off. God, you guys are still nauseating," Natasha groaned as Loki pulled away from Tony, but kept his hand firmly linked with his husband's. "Speaking of nauseating. Look at them. They're so disgustingly happy."

The three men followed Natasha's gaze toward the dance floor where Sebastian and Natasha were still slowly swaying together, eyes only for each other, even as the music thumped a fast-paced beat. Until Sif and Sian interrupted for a picture. Loki hummed softly in agreement with Natasha and snuck a sideways glance at her.

"When do you think they'll tell us?"

"They better make it soon," Natasha replied without missing a beat. "She has to be fifteen, sixteen weeks, if I'm guessing right."

"Sounds about right."

"What the hell are you two talking about?" Clint asked, spinning his cup of punch in one hand as he lifted his other arm to rest on the back of Natasha's chair. She turned her head, giving him that look that told him he'd missed something she caught on to quickly. "What?"

"Tell him," she urged Loki, jerking her head at Clint.

"Uh —" Loki was taken aback and he laughed as he stuttered. "Why me? He's your husband. And she's your daughter."

"Your kid did it."

"Did what? What are you talking about?" Clint leaned forward causing Natasha to sit back.

"Shut the front door." All three turned to look at Tony after his declaration. Loki smirked. Tony's eyes bounced between Loki and Natasha before shooting over to Sebastian. How did he not pick up on this? "Oh, shit…"

"What?" Clint demanded, growing frustrated he hadn't figured this out yet. Loki laid a hand on his forearm behind Natasha's back.

"Calm yourself, Clint. They've yet to confirm, and I'm expecting any day now they will, but until then my  _ suspicions  _ — and Natasha's, which I did not doubt she would have — are that…" He leaned in, beckoning Clint forward and whispered two words.

He shot up straight.  _ "What?" _   


"Clint." Natasha nearly hissed his name. He looked around, but he had only drawn a few people's attention. "Hey. Hon." Natasha tried to get him to look at her.

"You telling me this is a goddamn shotgun wedding?"

Both Loki and Natasha said a firm no. "Babe, think about it. They got engaged months ago. She probably didn't even know until after he proposed. From what I can tell, she's probably barely into her second trimester. "

"Well —"

"Shut up, Loki," she snapped.

"Can't believe that little shit is making me a grandfather." Loki snickered at Tony and pinched his cheek. "Don't laugh!" Though he could barely hold back his own chuckles. "I'm still young. I'm gonna be the youngest-looking grandpa ever."

"You're nearly sixty years old, Anthony. That is quite a suitable age to be a grandparent. And keep your voice down. Sebastian and Anastasia have yet to say anything."

"About what?" Sebastian's voice came from out of nowhere.

Four sets of eyes shot up, staring at the bride and groom as they approached and stopped at the table, hand-in-hand. Everyone looked at Loki to reply; a genuine smile stretched his lips. "About why it’s a dry wedding, darling. That's all. Your father is, not surprisingly, unhappy."

"How do you celebrate without liquor? Our ancestors did not fight Prohibition so we could toast with fruit punch."

"Dad…"

"I'm just saying."

Sebastian and Anastasia exchanged a glance, and Loki recognized the look in Anastasia's eyes. It was a look he had seen often in Natasha's that expressed a need for something to get done, and soon. So it wasn't too surprising when Sebastian requested Loki join him outside on the hall's quasi-porch, facing the parking lot.

"It was a lovely ceremony, darling," Loki said, as he followed Sebastian outside. Sebastian bobbed his brows at him, grinned softly. "I only wish your grandmother had been able to see it," he said softly.

"Yeah, me too." Sebastian sighed and turned to Loki. "You know, don't you?"

Feigning surprise, Loki's brows drew together. "Know what?" He had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from grinning when Sebastian angled his head in exasperation.

"Pop."

With the single word, Loki relented with a tiny laugh. "I only had an inkling. You've just confirmed it,  _ sønn _ ." As Sebastian looked down into his own glass of cider, Loki could see he was blushing slightly. "How far along is she?"

He took a long drink. "Eighteen weeks," he breathed out. "Almost nineteen."

"Was it planned?"

" _ No _ …" Sebastian answered emphatically, followed by a nervous laugh. "But…we are happy about it."

"Good. Surprise pregnancies are not all that uncommon, Sebastian. Particularly in this family. There is no need to feel embarrassed. You are both adults." He watched Sebastian for a moment, as he nodded in agreement, giving him the time to compose himself. "You know, you're about the age I was when your mother told me she was pregnant with you. Actually, a year older."

Sebastian lifted his eyes to Loki, inhaling deeply before releasing the breath slowly. "Were you scared shitless, too?"

Loki's sympathetic expression slipped away as he chuckled. "Considering, at the time, I was still harboring feelings for a man I hadn't set eyes on in five years, and I had only known your mother for roughly six months? Yes." Loki nodded with pursed lips. "Shitless sounds about right."

Sebastian grinned again, softly, then shifted a shoulder anxiously. "Listen, Pop…I know this all came about pretty fast — the wedding and everything. And now the, um…baby. And I know you were disappointed I postponed my next showing, but —"

"Wait a minute." Loki threw up a hand. "Firstly, I have no say in your career, Sebastian. You made the decision you thought was right for you. I was only looking forward to the trip to New York and the break from writing." Sebastian laughed. "Secondly — and, honestly, I thought you knew — but this wedding has been in the planning stages since before you were out of diapers."

Sebastian snorted and drank more of his cider.

"My little Princess finally got what she wanted."

"I guess so."

"We all knew this day would come. Did it come a little sooner than we expected? Perhaps. Are we any less ecstatic for you both? Not at all."

Sebastian's smile dimmed. "And the scared shitless thing? Does that go away?"

"Never." They both laughed and Loki glanced out toward the parking lot, spotting Axel, sitting behind the wheel of Tony's car. "Damn it. Axel Edward Stark, get your behind out of that car this instant!"

Sebastian turned to see what was going on and watched as Axel stepped out from the driver's seat of Tony's car. Charlie Barton was beside him in the passenger seat. He snickered softly to himself as Axel threw up his hands in frustration.

"We're just listening to the radio, Pop!"

"I don't give a damn what you are doing! Turn off the car and get out  _ now! _ "

Axel and Charlie both started to climb out and Sebastian snuck a look at Loki. He recognized the look of exasperation, saw the lines of worry and every other emotion etched into Loki's handsome face. He had more questions and things he felt like he needed to say, but he swallowed everything back as Axel and Charlie started up the steps into the hall.

Loki's arm shot out, fingers curling into Axel's dress shirt at his arm. "Hold it. Charlotte, you may go inside."

"Oh, but…" Loki gave her a stern look. "Never mind. See you, Ax."

Loki waited until the young girl was inside before releasing Axel and holding out his hand. "Give me the keys."

Scowling darkly, Axel dropped the keys in Loki's hand. "I wasn't gonna go anywhere. I just wanted to show her —"

"I care not what you  _ wanted _ to do, Axel. You asked to retrieve your music player, not waste your father's gas fooling around to show off for Charlotte."

"Ew! I wasn't showing off! She's like my sister. I'm not into incest. Unlike  _ some _ people." He slanted a look at Sebastian, with long-lashed honey-colored eyes, and earned a sharp shove from his older brother. Name-calling and more shoving ensued between the brothers separated by more than a decade.

"Enough!" Loki wrapped his fingers around Axel's arm and pulled him away from a giggling Sebastian. "Do you want to extend your punishment another week?"

Axel frowned even more, looking to Sebastian once more. "I thought parents were supposed to get mellower as they got old." Sebastian's response was to snort and Loki nudged Axel's shoulder.

"Watch it. You're already on thin ice, young man."

"Sorry I can't be all perfect like the Golden Child over here." He shoved a hand in Sebastian's direction.

"Hey, don't drag me into this, Squirt. If anybody knows I'm not perfect, it's Pop."

"Get inside, Axel," Loki lightly ordered before Axel could sass Sebastian further. After he disappeared into the hall, Loki sighed and grabbed for Sebastian's cider, swallowing it down. "Is Anastasia being pregnant why we don't have any bloody champagne at this wedding?"

"Yes," Bash answered with a laugh. "For the record, the only complaints we've had came from Dad and you." Loki glanced his way with a slight smirk.

"I could have used the liquor at this very moment, that's all."

Sebastian looked up, inside, at Axel, still pouting as he joined his cousins and siblings. "You want me to talk to him?"

Humming in thought, Loki turned to lean on the porch railing. "What, and tell stories of the Golden Child's brightest moments?"

They both laughed. "Hey, Axel wasn't around for my best work. And he was still a baby when I was in high school."

"That's true." Loki looked at Sebastian again, a wistful half-smile on his lips. "You were worse than him." Sebastian laughed, shrugging a little. "You gave me more gray hairs than your brother and sister ever did."

Quieting, Sebastian swallowed. " _ Jeg er redd, Pappa _ ."

Straightening up, Loki laid a hand on Sebastian's shoulder, giving it a good shake. " _ Jeg vet, kjærlighet _ ." His hand slid down to give Sebastian's elbow a squeeze. "You'll be fine, Sebastian. Your father and I are only a short flight away. And your mother and Sian are close by in Boston. And Pepper and Happy. And your Uncle Thor and Aunt Jane…"

"I know,  _ Pappa _ . I know all that." Sebastian nodded, working his jaw in thought. "But, actually…"

"I knew there was something brewing in there." Sebastian chuckled and Loki leaned an elbow on the railing again.

"We're contemplating a move back to L.A."

"Really? Is that feasible, with your gallery here? And Anastasia's work and school?"

Sebastian shrugged. "I can work from anywhere. And I might have to fly back for shows, but that's what? Once, maybe twice, a year. If that. Or I could just find a showroom in L.A. And Ana…she hasn't told her parents yet, but she's been offered a position out there. That's why we're thinking about it."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. Came out of nowhere, really. She wasn't expecting something like this for at least another five years." Loki lifted a brow in question. "She's been offered a teaching position. Teaching courses in the Slavic Languages department. History and probably a couple of languages courses, too."

"Wow."

"Right?” Sebastian beamed with pride for his new bride. “And she can continue working on her PhD. If she gets it by a certain date, she can be upgraded to assistant professor and eventually get tenure. Aunt Tasha will flip when Ana tells her."

Loki grinned. "It's at USC isn't it?"

"Yup," he answered with a nod.

"Well." Excitement bubbled up in Loki's chest, but he suppressed it as best he could, not wanting to get his hopes up just yet. "We would love having you both closer. Especially when my first  _ barnebarn _ arrives." Sebastian agreed cheerfully then paused to inhale deeply. "Darling. Don't stress yourself." Loki stepped closer to cup Sebastian's cheek, still awed that, standing at full height, Sebastian was taller than him, and gave Sebastian's cheek a pat. "There's a lifetime of worry ahead of you. I promise. But…I happen to think you're going to be a wonderful father. I may be biased, however."

Sebastian grinned down at Loki, his black lashes fluttering as his eyes stung. "As long as I'm half as good as you…"

"Mm," Loki smirked, forcing back the emotion that clogged his throat. "Sentiment, darling," he said tightly. He started to drop his hand and Sebastian reached for it, giving it a tight squeeze before releasing it.

"It's my wedding day. I'm allowed to be sentimental."

"Hmm, if only your younger self could hear you now." He moved again, to rest against the rail, looking inside the hall. He grinned, seeing Axel and Jameson trying to show off on the dance floor with their male cousins.

"Pop, can I ask you something?" Loki hummed affirmatively. "It's kind of weird, but…how did you know Dad was…The One?" Frowning slightly, Loki turned up his face to him. "You hated him at first, right?"

Loki chuckled, shifting to face him. "Hate would be a bit strong. He was just…so obnoxious and loud. And arrogant as Hel."

"So not much has changed in, what, thirty years."

"Thirty-five, smart ass." They both laughed, but Sebastian watched as Loki's laughter faded, and a nostalgic expression crossed his face. When he spoke again, he was so serious, it almost concerned him. "I was filled with anger when I met him, Sebastian. I was angry at Odin, angry at Thor — at the world. It took one weekend, one drunken conversation, for me to see that he and I were both so much alike. Both lost, both scared. Both  _ broken _ . He was just better at hiding it." He shifted again, then straightened. "You asked how I knew he was The One?"

Sebastian nodded and Loki shrugged a shoulder.

"I don't know that I had that moment, honestly. I knew I loved him more than anyone, and I knew our connection was nothing I had ever experienced before, but… Your father and I were never a conventional couple. I mean, it really all started off heat and hormones."

Sebastian groaned. "Yeah, I read your second biography, Pop."

"Then you know it developed from there. Even when we were apart, we were never really free of each other. He healed whatever it was inside me that was broken, Sebastian. And I like to think I did the same for him."

"I'm sure you did," he agreed with a soft smile.

"But the moment I knew I simply could not live the rest of my days without that man beside me was when this…adorable little four year old monster…" Sebastian scoffed, rolled his eyes. "…oh so innocently asked him if he could call him 'Daddy,' and Anthony, after only being in your life for, I don't know, two months? He so freely, and eagerly, said yes."

Sebastian blinked, narrowing one eye."You mean to tell me you knew he was The One because  _ I _ asked him to be my dad?" he asked incredulously.

"No. What I am saying is that I knew because in that moment, my dear Sebastian, my life was complete." Sebastian decided not to point out the sentiment of Loki's statement, only nodded in understanding.

The moment passing, Tony came strolling out, flask in hand. "Hey, your wife is asking for you, kiddo." He stopped, frowned. "Holy shit. There's a sentence I wasn't ever expecting to say."

Grateful for the break in that serious moment, Sebastian smiled at him. "Thanks, Dad." He looked at Loki, gave him a nod. " _ Takk, Pappa _ ."

Returning the nod with a grin, Loki slipped his hands into the pockets of his dress slacks. Sebastian started for the hall, pausing by Tony long enough to grab his flask and take a long sip. "Hey! What the —"

"Thanks." He handed it back and took Tony by the shoulders. "By the way, you're gonna be a grandfather."

Tony was scowling, but at Sebastian's words he looked up with wide eyes. "No shit?"

"No shit."

Tony and Sebastian exchanged pats to the back, then Sebastian disappeared inside. Tony looked to Loki, bobbing his brows. "So you were right?"

"Mm-hmm," Loki hummed, allowing Tony to slide his arm around him as he neared. "How do you feel about that, Grandpa?"

Tony made a dissatisfied noise. "We're gonna have to work on that name. I'm not digging Grandpa Tony."

Loki chuckled and kissed his temple. "We'll figure it out. We've got time."

Tony turned, lifting his face to Loki's. "You two have a good talk about it?"

He grinned widely, brushed his fingers through Tony's hair. Thinking of their early days made him overly affectionate. "Yes."

Straightening, Tony's face changed instantly. "What?"

"What? Nothing. What?"

"You have that look again."

He practically chortled. "What look?"

" _ That _ look! The one you get right before you get all mushy and say something sugary sweet to me. Or about me. Or the kids."

"I do not have such a look," Loki argued, lifting his chin. "I was simply admiring my husband and marveling at how far we've come."

"Shit, here we go. Spill it, Loki."

Loki tried to resist, to hold back the emotions and thoughts that had built up during his conversation with Sebastian, but he couldn't anymore. He slapped his hands to Tony's chest. "Sebastian is married, Anthony. Married."

Unable to resist Loki's mixture of happiness and sadness himself, Tony softened. "I know, babe. With Kiddo Jr. on the way."

"And my little Jameson seems to have inherited his father's taste for science and partying. And is poised to take over Stark Industries whenever you finally decide to allow him."

Tony scoff-laughed, slipping an arm around Loki. "Yeah, that's not gonna happen anytime soon, babe. I'm not ready to vacate the premises yet. And he's only twenty-three. Kid's got a ways to go."

"You're not ready yet? Not even to chase the summer season around the globe with me in tow, like you once said you wanted?" Long, pale fingers danced up Tony's chest. Tony grabbed them in his work-worn hand, kissed them lightly.

"Tsk. That was years ago, Loki. Besides, you're creamy pale skin wouldn't fare very well in all that sun," he said, chucking Loki under the chin.

"Fair enough. Then there's our sweet girl…"

"Woman," Tony corrected, earning a curious glance. "She is woman. Hear her roar. Or she'll kick your ass."

Loki laughed and conceded, "Woman. Did she tell you of the offer in Washington D.C.?"

Tony's jaw clenched. "Mmhmm."

Smiling affectionately, Loki circled his arms around Tony's neck. "You don't want her to go."

"Do I want my very beautiful, very gorgeous, very talented daughter traveling to D.C. to work at some cheap start-up business that is completely dependent on her work, and her name, to get going? No."

Loki laughed. "She would be perfectly fine, love.  _ If _ she decides to go. She doesn't know if she wants to yet. She'd have to transfer her credits for her last year. It's a lot of work. And you know, Sif and Sian are close by. And Emma's still at our old alma mater."

"I know…but she won't be here."

"True. But she plans to head to New York anyway, darling. She wants to be on the stage. Only a good, solid role will keep her here." Tony pouted softly. "We've still got Axel for another three years. At least."

Tony groaned lightly, dropping his head to Loki's shoulder. "You know, the crazy thing is he isn't even as bad as Bash was. Or Jazz. And none of them gave me grief like my Monkey."

Loki chuckled absently, slipping out of Tony's arms to rest against the railing again, pulling Tony closer to rest against him, his back to Loki's chest, arms firmly around his waist, chin propped in the crook of Tony's neck. "I know. Growing pains, darling. Again. But he's our baby…"

"Yeah…"

"Look at them," Loki murmured beside Tony’s ear, watching as Sebastian and Anastasia posed for a photo with their respective siblings.

At Ana's side were her two younger brothers, Rowan and Xander. Xander's arm was wrapped around young Charlie's shoulders, pulling her further into the huddle. Beside Bash, was Jazz, shorter than his older brother and his baby sister, Audi, who was busy posing like she was walking a red carpet, jet black curls flowing down her back, glossy red lips spread in a bright smile, her dark purple bridesmaids dress sadly getting trampled among her brothers' clumsy feet. And oblivious to the bunny ears Axel was giving her.

"They look  _ almost _ as happy as you and I were."

" _ Are _ ," Tony corrected, giving him a nudge. Loki pressed a kiss to his cheek. "They got nothin' on us. This ain't Monte Carlo, but it's all right." Loki chuckled in his ear. It tickled Tony and he jerked slightly against him. "You think they're gonna be all right?"

"I think they'll be just fine, darling. They're strong individually; stronger together. Like Clint and Natasha. Like you and I."

"Nobody's as strong as you and me, babe," Tony murmured as he slid his hands over Loki's arms. "They really do look good together, though, don't they?"

Loki smiled, giving Tony another tight squeeze. "They're perfect, darling. Picture perfect."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translations:
> 
> kjæreste = sweetheart
> 
> дурак = fool
> 
> Jeg er redd = I'm scared
> 
> Jeg vet, kjærlighet = I know, love
> 
> Takk = Thanks


End file.
